Adaline's point of view:
I feel lonely. Incredibly lonely. There are no patients here in Swansea that I can relate to, but I wasn't really expecting that anyway. What I expected was Wlad to contact me in any way. I still have my iPhone but he hasn't called me. Not after he found out I got arrested. Not after he found out I got sued. Not after finding out I sneaked out in the middle of the night and gave away the Maserati. He didn't contact me at all. There were times we were in the same house, times when simply four walls separated us and he acted like nothing happened between us. He acted like the last years didn't happen at all. He acted like he didn't love me at all. He acted like we didn't spend two wonderful years together.
It hurt so badly that I wanted to scream. I wanted to yell at him. I wanted to throw things at him. I wanted to wrap my arms around him. Kiss him. Love him the way he loves me.
But I couldn't.
We are over.
I wince as a knock on my door interrupts my thoughts.
"Adaline, you have a visitor." Dr. Martin says to me, sticking his dark brown haired head into my room. I've been working with him the last four weeks. He suggested music therapy for me, so I've been sitting at the piano doing exactly what my mother does for her living: writing songs. Only mine are dark and full of pain. I don't know how she is able to write happy love songs. Love hurts. It sucks. Dr. Martin is a psychologist and I told him everything that ever happened in my life. Including Wlad and the pain he made me feel. The pain I made us feel. Somehow it felt good to pour my heart out towards a stranger. An independent third party that had a totally objective vision on us. Only he didn't like to share his opinion of us. He rather asks how I feel about it.
I don't work with my aunt and I'm glad it's that way. She would kill me for all the shit I created.
"Okay. Let her in." The visitor must be my Mom who got inpatient or my father... or maybe my sister. It can't be Brooke or Sophie because they know exactly how rehab works. No visitors in the first four weeks.
Dr. Martin turns around and leaves me alone. I stare at the half open door. Who the hell wants to see me on now? I can hear heavy footsteps walking down the hallway. It can only be my Dad as my Mom and sister aren't heavy enough to create such sounds. The door opens fully. I stop breathing.
Wlad is standing there. In my doorway in all of his glory. He's wearing a pair of dark jeans and a black Oxford shirt with matching shoes. He is standing there... right? This is not my mind playing tricks on me, is it?
Am I dreaming? I mean, this is not real... it can't be. We haven't talked to each other since Brooke's and Marco's engagement party. And now he's just standing here on my doorstep? This has to be a dream. It has to!
"Hi." I breathe out as I decide I'm not dreaming.
"Open or close?" He asks me.
I missed his deep voice. I missed everything about him. Goosebumps start covering my arms and legs. "Closed."
He nods before closing the door and stepping into my room. It's a single bedroom on the third floor. I have a view over the shores and sea. It's stunning. But it doesn't make me feel less lonely or hurt. I watch Wlad waking over to me and scanning the room for a place to sit. There's a chair at a desk but other than that there's only the bed to sit on. With me. "May I?" He asks, his grey orbs focused on the other end of the bed. Far away from me. It's like he's afraid of me.
Maybe he should be. I fucked up so many times in the last year and a half that I don't even recognise the woman who is staring back at me in the mirror.
But slowly... very slowly, the drug addict, the gambler, the street racer... all of them start disappearing in the mirror. And one day... one day, there will only be Adaline in the mirror when I look. Just Adaline.
"Of course." I whisper and catch myself smiling.
He sits down and I can feel how the mattress gives in under his impressive weight. He hasn't changed since I last saw him. He's still muscular. "How... how are you, Adaline?"
Adaline. We're back where we started over three years ago. I gulp down my emotions, doing the opposite what Dr. Martin told me to. "I'm good. How are you?"
"Good."
"Great."
"Great..." he echoes before brushing through his dark brown short hair. I used to do that a lot. I miss feeling his hair between my fingers. I miss him. Very badly. But I made my choice and he did, too. "Fuck that, I'm not good or great." He hisses through his teeth.
"I'm not good either. I'm bored here. This is not a place for someone with my capacity."
He stares at me, studying my face. I know that because he has a certain look in his eyes when he does that. And he cocks his head, just slightly, maybe three or five degrees, to the right. It's always the right. Never the left. I missed this look on him.
Suddenly, his gaze changes and he straightens his head position. Something happened. Something is wrong. Awfully wrong.
"What happened?" I ask him, feeling his sadness at the other end of the single bed. It crawls up my spine, filling my body with coldness and fear.
He licks his lips and looks away from me, "My grandma she..."
"She's dying." I breathe out, counting one and one together.
"Yes. It's... it's time for her to leave us." He shrugs. "But it still hurts."
Of course it does. It always does. "Then fly over to Siberia."
He looks back at me. "Not without you. I promised her to meet you."
My mouth falls open. What? Why did he do that? We're over. We have been over for a long time. "Wlad, how do you expect me to leave?" I ask him and shrug. "I'm in rehab. A judge is calling here once a week to see how I'm doing. I have doctors and therapists looking out for me. I have art classes to attend to and yoga and pilates and all sorts of other therapy to do. I am in therapy."
"But you're not crazy or an addict. You're just stuck here."
"Exactly, I am stuck here. I can't leave."
"I'm not asking you to leave with me."
Then why is he here? What does he want?
"I'm telling you to leave with me."
"What?" He can't just walk in here and expect me to walk out with him like nothing ever happened.
He gets off the bed, "I talked to Dr. Martin. He gave you green light for three days outside this facility. I'd like to take you with me. Maybe not for the funeral but for meeting her. As long as she's still on this earth."
"Wlad," I stop as he holds out his hand. I eye it but take it without thinking twice. The same electric shock as three years ago rushes through me. It's like we never ever parted ways.
"I have a car waiting for us and a plane ready to take off whenever you're ready." He whispers.
I nod. "I'd follow you everywhere."
He pulls me up to my knees. "I was hoping you'd say that."
The flight to Siberia is long and silent. I thought once we're alone together the words would flow out of my mouth. But they don't. And they don't flow out of his mouth either, that's not necessarily a surprise but I'm still surprised. The last time we talked was in front of a police station - no, that was our last kiss. Our real, uninterrupted, last talk... must have been when we broke up. When I broke up with him. Because of Parkinson's. My dream.
Because of my egoism.
And now we're on his multimillion pound jet and there's still nothing to be said, when in fact there is so much I'd like to say. We're sitting as far away as possible on the plane. I'm staring out of the window but I feel his gaze burning into my skin. He's keeping his distance. I don't want to pressure him. I won't make the first step. Not in a sensitive and vulnerable situation like this. I want to be there for him and I will be, but completely on his terms.
We start landing. It's not as smooth as I would land this beauty we flew in, but I didn't fly through the heavy fog.
We deboard the small jet, having arrived in the middle of nowhere. The landing field is tiny. We're surrounded by pines, heavy fog and nature. I walk down the three stairs. Suddenly a wolf howls. We're definitely no longer in Europe.
It's a chilly October morning as we flew through the night. I wore a cashmere cardigan over my shirt but I'm freezing. I shiver as I turn around to see him following me out of the jet. My breath condenses as I breathe. There might be no snow yet but it still feels like winter. I should have packed winter boots. In England there's autumn slowly approaching but here it feels like they skipped autumn all together and went straight to winter. I should have packed more warm sweaters and definitely more than just a parker. I should have asked a scarf and beanie. Why didn't he tell me to?
Wlad stops behind me and I can feel his body heat radiating, warming up mine. It feels so good! And his smell, that ocean breeze, mixes with the smell of the pines, creating a heartwarming smell.
Suddenly, I feel his heavy leather jacket that's padded with fake fox fur around my shoulders. At least I hope it's fake. "Thank you." I whisper, needing the warmth and smell of him. I hold the jacket by the collar as I follow him through the heavy fog. In his hands are our travel bags. I should have brought more clothes to layer. These three days are going to be freezing! I have no idea how he's going to drive in this weather. I can barely see my hand. It's going to be dangerous. Very dangerous. But I know I'm safe with him. I've always been safe.
We stop in front of an old SUV, a Lada. I thought by now the company died. But they clearly still exist. The car's a dark navy but I didn't see it earlier due to the heavy fog. He opens the door for me and I jump in. Then he opens the trunk and throws in our travel bags. A brown and black leathered bag that holds all our necessities. He closes the trunk and walks around the car. He gets inside and starts the engine without a word. He puts on the heating as it's as cold as outside in this car.
"How long are we going to be on the road?" I ask him after thirty minutes of driving. The heating system slowly starts working so I take off his jacket.
"About three hours." He answers.
Three hours? We just flew seven and now another three on the road? We both didn't sleep on the flight. He must be exhausted. "We should switch halfway." I suggest.
"No, it's too dangerous here. I'll drive."
"But you must be tired."
"I'm fine."
Stubborn man! "Wladimir," I sigh.
He looks at me for a second. "We're driving over frozen lakes and past places you've never heard of. We're going to drive so deeply through the woods that deers, boars, grey wolves and maybe even Siberian tigers may cross our way. We're in the middle of nowhere. I will not let you drive. End of story."
End of story. He sounds like my Dad. "Alright, fine."
His grey eyes turn back on the road ahead of us. "You can take a nap. I'll wake you when we're there."
"I'm not tired."
"Adaline, you didn't sleep on the plane. You have to be tired."
He is right. He's always right. "Alright, fine." I lean against the window and close my eyes, falling quickly into a deep sleep.
Wladimir's point of view:
I drive through the fog that has welcomed us as we touched Siberian ground. The further we drive, the colder it gets. Normally I would have taken the helicopter to fly to the dacha, but not with this kind of weather. The fog is getting even more dense as we drive over the iced lake. Snow is covering the ice and everything around me. The vast forest has wrapped its arms around the lake. I'm home. It's cold, so cold that I wear warm cashmere gloves on my hands as I drive through the beloved impassible roads to strangers. I heard a couple of wolves howl as we drove through the woods earlier. There are only dirt roads, not even a map would have those kind of roads. Let alone google maps. Here, right here, only the locals know which way to go, which way to turn and most importantly which ways to avoid. That's why I didn't want Adaline to drive here. It's not safe, not without me behind the wheel.
I look to my right and see that the love of my life is still fast asleep, holding on to my warm jacket. She fell asleep three hours ago and I had to restrain myself to not touch her. My hands are shaking despite the heating system that's on. I'm not cold, I'm not cold at all. The need to touch her makes me shake so much that it's getting hard to maintain the lane. It was hard during the flight, but this... this is almost breaking me in half. She didn't talk to me on the flight like I'd hope she would. I didn't think I'd get her to join me on the flight. Convincing Dr. Martin was surprisingly easy, Adaline must have mentioned me. He just glanced at me and nodded, giving me permission to get her out of that institute. He promised me to not let Shailene, Adaline's aunt, know although I have no idea how he's going to keep this a secret. But I trust him, I mean, I have to. But convincing her... I thought she wouldn't say yes. I thought she'd choose to stay there instead of going with me. But she did.
And now we're here.
I stop the car at a three story wooden house that I had built for my grandma as soon as I had the money. It serves as a home for her and my father as well as a dacha in the summer. In the summer the lake is behind the house is glittering, the smell of pines along with the warm kisses of the sun. It's beautiful. A stunning home.
I kill the engine, the fog has almost cleared up completely. There's only one car parked next to mine, another Lada Taiga in dark green. My father's car.
I pivot my body and stare at my love, she didn't even notice that I stopped the car. Her head is resting against the window, she used my leather jacket as a pillow. I let my eyes run down her body, seeing the light grey cashmere cardigan over a white shirt and light washed jeans. Her feet are tucked into her beloved black Gucci loafers. She looks thin, thinner than she did when I saw her last in that hotel room at the Ritz. Which was five weeks ago. I don't think therapy is so good for her, but that was the deal. Therapy or prison. She chose wise. I'm sure Troy made her choose that wisely, because she would have never caved. But Troy knows better. She would have died in jail.
I would have died if she went there. She means too much to me. She's the love of my life.
My left hand starts shaking as I move it closer to her. I can't believe the woman I love is here. Here in my home, my sanctuary. The woman whose smell reminds me of this, is here. Here. It feels surreal.
Adaline's point of view:
Tingles spread from my cheek that quickly turn into fireworks and I shiver from the touch, awakening from my deep sleep. My eyes flutter open and I stare at Wlad - he looks breathtaking. This chiselled chin, that five o'clock shade, that smile... and these glittering grey orbs. I missed seeing these eyes as e first thing when I wake up. I miss smelling that ocean breeze and running my fingers through that short brown hair. It wasn't a dream. I really did fly to Siberia with him. To visit his dying grandma.
I lift my head from the window, feeling the stiffness in my neck already. "Hi." I greet him, noticing my hoarse voice.
"We've arrived." He says with a smile on his lips. His voice is the most beautiful thing I ever heard. I can't believe this is real, that we are here... that we are together.
I feel my heart swelling in my chest, I missed this smile so much... I missed seeing him. I missed being with him. I missed him badly. "Did we?" I turn my head around and stare at a three story post and beam style house. There are huge French windows between the thick logs. A veranda is running around the house on the main floor, wrapped around balconies are on the other two floors. There's a lake behind the house. The Russian taiga surrounds the house, there's nothing and no one else here. Just this house, a lake and pure nature. That's his dacha? It's huge!
I could spent my last days here as well.
"That's where your grandma lives?"
"With my dad."
"Did he remarry after your mother died?" From Parkinson's, but I'd rather not mention the reason why we broke up. Selfish needs.
"No. He once told me that he's like a swan. Swans' love for their partners is so deep they mate for life. My dad's the same. He said he found his partner but there's no life for him after her."
I gulp, I have a feeling we are like swans as well. We mate for life, with occasional time off. Like for my Parkinson's study. "I see. So it's just the two of them in this huge house?"
"There's a nurse coming in daily for my grandma and cleaning staff of course."
"A cook?"
"No, my Dad cooks."
I smirk, "Your Dad cooks and you don't?"
He returns my smirk, "Didn't. I had the best teacher." He opens the door of the car and I watch him getting out.
I had the best teacher. Yet, I never cooked something from the Russian cuisine. I decide to change that while I'm here. Maybe his grandma can show me some things. Or his Dad. Maybe they can teach me his favourite dish.
I open the door and get out of the car just as Wlad closes the trunk of the Lada. In his left hand he's holding our leathered travel bags. I shut the car door close and watch him walking over to me without locking the car. But why would you lock a car here, in the middle of nowhere? The nearest hospital is four hours away, the closest village is three and a half hours away. All by car. No one will ever step a foot onto this property. Plus, I think it might be fenced as well. The property probably is protected by heavy gates.
I know the love of my life well enough.
Suddenly, he grabs my right hand with his. I shiver from the touch as fireworks explode inside of me. I missed this feeling so badly. It feels so right that this between us can't be wrong. It will never be wrong. It's just not the time for it to be right either.
Because of my selfish needs.
Hand in hand, we walk to the front door of the house. I stop walking as we reach the front door, suddenly panicking. What if they don't like me? What has he told them about us? What if- "Wlad, wait." I say, pulling on his hand.
"What?" He turns around and stares at me.
"What did you tell them about us? Do they know who I am? Who you are in relation to me? Do they know we've broken up? Do they know what I did in the past? About the street races? The drugs? Do they know I'm a doctor? A fucking wonder child? Do they know about the clinical trail? Do they know I'm in therapy? Wlad, what are we-" I stop talking as he seals his lips over mine. I let go of his hand and wrap my arms around his neck as a fucking atomic bomb explodes inside of. My body's on fire, my whole skin is prickling with the sensation that exploded in my heart. I pull him closer to me, until our bodies melt together. I can hear him dropping our travel bags with a loud thud. Our tongues entwine as his smell fills my nostrils. His hands are wrapped safely around my rip cage, holding me so close that I forget to breath for a second. How much I missed this... how much I missed him.
After what felt like forever, he pulls away from my lips first. "That's what we are. That's what we'll always be. You and me. Together. For the next three days. We can be ourselves here. There's no media, no therapy, no hospital." He says to me before picking up the bags again. "No judging."
There's no way we could be anything less after how he just kissed me. I nod, still totally overwhelmed by the kiss. The butterflies go crazy in my stomach. For these three days, the last year and a half didn't happen.
Suddenly, the door opens and I get greeted by a man in his sixties. His dark brown hair has silver lines, his face is slightly wrinkled despite his old age and his eyes... God, now I know who gave Wlad his stunning grey orbs!
"I thought I heard something fall." He says in fluent Russian before wrapping his arms around his son. I lock the image of this father-son embrace deep in my memory. It's a lovely picture. "I missed you, son."
"I missed you, too, Dad." Wladimir says back as he gets released form his father's embrace. Grey orbs stare into grey orbs for a second, both sharing the same smile. This trip feels right already, just for these thirteen seconds. It was worth it already.
The man tears his eyes off of his son, "You must be Adaline, I'm Sergei." Wlad's father's English has a very heavy Russian accent. It reminds me of his son.
"Nice to meet you, Sir. We can stick to Russian." I say with a soft smile on my lips. I've never been more thankful than now that I'm speaking Russian fluently. I never thought it would come this at handy. I never thought I'd fall in love with my bodyguard either.
"Right, Wlad told me that when he called to tell us you guys were coming. Call me Sergei or Seryozha, however you prefer. You're practically family."
I look at Wlad. He didn't call anyone as long as we're together. In the last fifteen hours, he hasn't even looked at his phone. "When did you tell him that?"
"Yesterday morning." He says with a smirk on his lips.
Wait, does that mean he told them we were coming before I knew about this trip in the first place? "But-"
"I told you I wasn't going to leave without you. I would have dragged you here nevertheless." With that he steps into the house, walking past Sergei.
I watch him walk into the impressive foyer that's floated with natural light. He sure as hell wasn't going to leave without me. There's a dome in the ceiling to let in as much light as possible. Thick dark logs are everywhere, but somehow the wood is not overpowering. It's welcoming, cosy and warm.
"Come inside. It's cold outside." Sergei's voice fills my ears.
Cold? It's freezing! I step inside and Sergei closes the door behind me.
"I'll bring our bags to our bedroom." Wlad disappears, walking up one of the two spiral staircases.
"I made a fire in the living room so you can get warm." Sergei says and I follow him through his stunning house! The high ceilings, the wood everywhere, the natural light coming from the huge windows... this place has something magical.
We reach the huge living room. There are big leather couches across the open fireplace and warm fluffy rugs on the floor. Another seating area is across the three floor to ceiling windows. A dining table is all the way on the left. A huge wooden table with sixteen chairs. The fire is cracking in the fireplace and I feel warmer already.
"Wow, this is amazing!" I stop across the three floor to ceiling windows. They go all the way from the main floor up to the third floor. I stare at the lake in front of me, the water is glittering underneath the ice layer. The ice layer is not thick enough to go ice skating but maybe tomorrow or the day after it will be since winter is practically here. Heavy snow is surrounding the house, making it the perfect getaway. The perfect sanctuary.
Suddenly, I see three children running through the backyard as a barefooted Wlad is chasing them in the midst of summer. Two boys with dark brown curly hair and blue eyes, about five and a girl with chestnut coloured curls and light grey orbs in a stunning white dress. Giggles fill my ears as he catches a little girl that's a little younger. He swings her through the air and her giggle turns into laughter as he starts tickling her.
I see a swing at the old oak tree that's to my left and two lounge chairs by the wooden jetty. I see two old wrinkly people sitting in those chairs, holding hands as the sun sets.
I see my future.
And I'm in tears.
I quickly wipe away the tears and inhale deeply. Shit, I thought only Ana was able to see those kind of things. My hands are shaking from the indescribable feeling in my heart.
"Hey, are you okay?"
Wlad's voice reaches my ears just a second before his strong arms embrace me from behind. I lean against his chest, I feel home. I am home. "Three." I breathe out as my throat is still tight from the emotions I'm feeling. His body heat starts warming up mine better than any open fireplace.
"What?"
I clear my throat, "We'll have three children."
He rests his head on my right shoulder, "We will?"
"Maybe four, but definitely three." I say as I only saw the two boys and the girl with Wlad. "One girl. Two boys."
He tightens the embrace, "I like that."
I do, too. "I know."
He places a kiss on my right cheek, "Don't close up from me."
"I'm not."
"It doesn't feel this way."
I tilt my head to the side, revealing my welled eyes. "We will raise our children here. We will grow old together. This is not only our present but our future."
He licks his lips at my words, understanding their deeper meaning. "Are you scared?"
"No."
His eyes widen at that simple word, "No?"
"I'm excited." I whisper. I'm so excited that for a split second I want to throw my Parkinson's study overboard. I turn around in his embrace and tilt my head back, "You are my past and you are my future. But not my present."
"For the next three days I am."
"Okay..."
"Okay." He kisses me softly, clearly not ashamed of showing his emotions in front of his father. I totally forgot about Sergei.
I break away from his lips and look over Wlad's shoulder, seeing his father's light grey eyes staring at us. With his dark blue lumberjack shirt and dark jeans, he looks like he fits just right in. Wlad embraces me tightly. "I'm sorry, I didn't-"
"There's absolutely nothing you have to be sorry for." The look on his face is the same Wlad has given me the last three years. It's full of love. No judging. Just love.
"I love you." Wlad's whisper fills my right ear, but it sounds like a cry for me. A cry to say it back.
But I can't. Not until I healed Parkinson's. Not until I've made an impact on this world. Not until I've helped millions of patients. "I know." I whisper back, squeezing him. I can't give myself to him. Not yet.
But soon. Whenever soon is.
"Come on, you two lovebirds. Let's have something to eat by the open fireplace."
Wladimir chuckles as he lets go of me. "He never called me a lovebird before."
"That's because he has never met you with me by your side." I say with a smirk on my lips. I embrace him with one arm as we walk over to the open fireplace. On the coffee table are typical Russian snacks: caviar on baguettes, salted herring with onions, piroshki, prickles, plyushka (a pastry that consists of bread coated with sugar) and bears in the forest chocolate bars (milk chocolate coated wafers).
"Wow, that's too much. We can't possibly eat all of that."
"You need to gain some weight. You're too skinny!" Sergei says with a smile on his lips as we all sit down on the floor. We eat casually with crossed legs, a coffee table full of food between us and an open fireplace in front of us. This house is not less luxurious than my home in Richmond, but we eat just the same. Like we're people, not multimillionaires. Because we are.
We're family.
I feel it deep in my heart.
I stick to the savoury dishes that are all delicious. "You made these all yourself?" I ask Sergei as I bite into another piroshok that's filled with minced meat and mushrooms.
He nods.
"They're amazing. You have to teach me how to do all of this."
"I always enjoy a pair of helping hands in the kitchen. My son is absolutely useless there."
I chuckle.
"Not any more. Della taught me how to cook."
Sergei raises one of his bushy dark brown eyebrows at me, "Did you?"
"Only the European cuisine."
"That's not true. Moroccan as well."
"And that." I give in. "We never cooked the Russian cuisine at home and we rarely went to Russian restaurants when I was younger." But I remember that their dishes weren't as good as this.
"We almost grow everything we use in the kitchen ourselves. We have chickens on the property for eggs. Our garden served us lots of veggies over the summer. I only buy the meat at the super market as well as grains."
"Amazing. What's your favourite dish?" I ask, looking at Wlad. The father of my future children. It somehow doesn't creep me out at all. It never did but having this reassurance... it gives me a feeling I never felt before. A feeing much stronger than love.
A feeing only my soulmate will understand.
"Oh, I'll show you that as well." Sergei says before Wlad can answer.
My head swings back at Sergei and I smile, "I'd like that. Where's your mother?" I ask as I suddenly remember the sad reason why I'm here with him in the first place.
"Sleeping. She had a rough night. But she might join us for dinner."
It's only early afternoon. I nod, "Well, you can show me around in the mean time. I want to see every centimetre of this property."
"That might take a while, since this is a 8.000 hectares property."
I choke on my piroshok, "What?"
"I bought a fair amount of land so we can have our celestial peace." Wlad explains.
I stare at him in disbelief, "Peace yeah, but 8.000 hectares?" My home in Richmond is five hectares big to ensure no one will ever bother us, but 8.000 hectares is a little excessive.
"I wanted to make sure no one will ever bother us here."
"So, you just bought the land between two villages?" I ask him shocked.
"Exactly."
"What?!" I breathe out shocked. He bought the land between two villages? I knew Wlad wasn't spending his multimillions lightly, but this... I shake my head in disbelief.
"It's worth it."
"I was never questioning whether or not it's worthy."
"Then what were you saying?"
I shrug, "I was just surprised over your protectiveness."
He raises an eyebrow at me, "After all we've been through, that still surprises you?"
I open my mouth to say something, but quickly realise that I have nothing to say. It shouldn't be surprising at all.
"Exactly."
Sergei's chuckle makes me look back at him. "You guys are so much like my wife and I used to be."
That's one of the best compliments he could have given me. I grab Wlad's hand and squeeze it. Maybe we are.
"Try some of the sweets." He says.
I shake my head, "I'm not really the sweet kind of type."
"Dad, I told you..." Wlad narrows his grey orbs at him.
I look at him, "You told him what?"
"That you can't have sugar."
"I thought you were joking." Sergei defends himself.
I look back at the man that created the love of my life. "No, he wasn't. I don't eat refined sugar. My body doesn't process sugar like every other."
"You're sugar intolerant?"
I smile, "Something like that. Whenever I have more than five tablespoons a day it keeps me awake for some time. I can't sleep for the next 24 hours and I work on overdose. My brain's overstimulation is the reason. So I stay away from refined sugar as much as possible. Fruits, veggies, carbs - they have another sugar to keep me going, but don't make me go crazy. It's always been this way, ever since I was little."
He nods, "More sweets for me then?"
I smile, "But I appreciate the effort, I really do."
"Wlad told me you're special." Special - that word doesn't even describe me properly. "He said you're very smart."
I inhale deeply, deciding to put my cards on the table. No games. Not with him. Not with his family. "I am highly gifted and talented. So is my sister, Anastasia. I have an IQ of 200, she has an IQ of 196. We started taking medical lessons when we were seven by a professor from Oxford. I graduated Oxford Med School with fourteen. Ever since I worked at St. Mary's hospital in Paddington, London. I am a surgeon there. Cardio, neuro and reconstructive surgery are my specialties. My hands have an insurance of 200 million pounds. I perform surgeries no one has ever dared to think of. I perform miracles as some might call it. The media labels me as a wonder child and your son has been with me every step I took. Wherever I went, he was there by my side. Special, doesn't even describe me properly and I don't think there is a word for it. But then again whatever we feel for each other is indescribable as well." I shrug, "I may only be twenty years old and there may be 22 years separating us, but-"
"Say no more." Sergei interrupts me. "My wife and me separated eight years but I would have married her if it were ten, fifteen or twenty five. My mother's husband was seventeen years older than her, so I am well aware that age is just a number. Soulmates find themselves one way or another. So, I don't judge you. I never could. I am happy that my son has finally brought you here so I can meet you. You're as amazing as he described you to be."
I stir the cooking buckwheat in the pot with a spoon. I convinced Wlad to go to bed a couple of hours ago, because that man hadn't slept in over eighteen hours. Sergei and I started to cook dinner. He's teaching me typical Russian dishes. We get along fine, much better than I hoped we would. I still haven't met his mother.
The kitchen smells delicious! It's a rustic country style kitchen with dark wooden cupboards and black marble countertops. There's a huge kitchen island in the middle of the room, two stove plates and two ovens. The window front to my right shows the stunning garden that they use here to grow their own veggies. I can only imagine how stunning this property looks without the snow in the summer. Not that it is any less stunning with fluffy snow covering the grounds.
"How about you wake up Wlad while I set the table?" Sergei asks me with a soft smile on his lips.
I nod, "Sounds like a good plan. Will your Mom join us?"
"I'll make sure of it."
I turn on my heel, "Where's our bedroom?"
"Third floor, left hallway, the last door."
I walk down the hallway before jumping up the wooden spiral staircase in the foyer. Three floors, that house is huge! It could hold my whole family with ease. I finally reach the top floor and turn left. I love how this whole house is made out of wood. It's such a contrast to my glass house in Kensington and even my home in Richmond. The hallway seems endless - and that's just the left wing!
I stop at the last wooden door. I wrap my hand around the gold doorknob and open the door. It's a stunning view that greets me. The outer walls are made out of glass completely, showing me the woods that surround this house as well as the massive lake. A white blanket is covering the pines and lake. Thanks to the window front it looks like we're flying in the sky. This is a stunning room. Now, I know why Wlad bought the penthouse in Parsons Green. The view over the water reminded him of this. Of his sanctuary. I look to my right and get greeted by an even more beautiful view.
My man is laying on his bed in just a white shirt and his black boxer briefs. He didn't even cover himself with a blanket, but with his body heat he doesn't have to. Two meters of pure strength and power sleep in this customised bed. Our leather bags are resting on a drawer that's standing between two wooden doors, probably the bathroom and walk-in wardrobe. There's no TV in this bedroom, but with a view like that why would you need it? The stars and moon must look stunning here as well as the rising or setting sun. Actually, no matter the time or weather, it will always look stunning. This panoramic view is breathtaking and so it the man sleeping in front of it.
My mouth dries out at the image. I haven't seen him like this in so long. I missed him. I missed him so badly.
For a moment I consider not waking him. He looks so peaceful, so stunning. There's no worry written all over his face. No pain or discomfort can have a hold on him when he's asleep. I love this man. God, I love this man to the moon and back.
But I can't tell him yet.
I inhale deeply before walking over to him. I knee in front of him and see how heavy my hand shakes as I reach out to touch him. The need to hold him, kiss him, just simply feel him is too much... I inhale deeply before carefully fondling his right cheek, "Солнышко," I whisper, slowly ripping him out of his deep sleep.
He stirs under my touch just like I did when he woke me up after our long journey here. He opens his eyes and I see a sparkle in his grey orbs I haven't seen since before I broke us up. Here, he is happy and carefree. Because there's absolutely nothing and no one that can separate us. Not here in his sanctuary. In the middle of nowhere. "Hi." He wraps his hand around my wrist and kisses every fingertip.
"Hi, slept well?" I ask with a smile on my lips.
"It still feels like I'm dreaming." He whispers before suddenly pulling on me wrist. A second later I am laying on top of him, on top of two meters of pure man. He rolls us over before kissing me deeply. I return his kiss, enjoying the warm mattress beneath my body and his radiating body heat on top of me. I run my fingers through his hair as I deep the kiss. My leg wraps around his steel hard ass and I press him further into me, until I feel his erection digging into my stomach. His smell washes over me, the ocean breezes mixes with the wooden smell from the house. It gives me a rush like no other. He is my drug. My only drug.
I pull away before we take it any further, "I left the door open."
"I don't care. They are three levels beneath us. They won't hear us."
I smile, "But I woke you up for dinner. Your Dad is waking up his Mom. I'm sure they're already sitting at the table, wondering where we are."
He stares deeply into my eyes and I can see his mind racing behind those stunning sparkling light grey orbs. "Fine." He growls before getting off of me. "But just to be clear, I will make love to you under the stars and moon tonight."
I feel the heat inside of me rising, "I'm looking forward to it."
"That makes two of us." He offers me his hand and I place mine in his. He pulls me up to my feet and kisses me quickly before turning around. He has an ass most men dream of. I watch him walking over to the left door and opening it. He switches on the light, revealing what I expected. A walk-in wardrobe that's wooden. It's a room that goes quite deep with an island in the middle. "Get in here. You should put on something warmer."
"But I didn't bring any warm sweaters. This cardigan is the warmest clothing item I brought." I complain, realising how stupid I sound. A wonder child with an IQ of 200 - the irony is definitely not lost on me.
"Get in here, Adaline." He demands.
I growl before following him. I stop in the doorway as I suddenly see why he wanted me to get in here. This is not his walk-in wardrobe. This is our walk-in wardrobe. There's a whole side that's full of feminine clothes. All colours, fabrics and designers I would wear. Jeans in all sorts of colours, blazers, sweaters, trousers, shirts, dresses, jackets, scarves, hats and beanies, shoes... even work out clothes. The cherry wooden drawers must be full of underwear and socks. He thought of everything. I can't believe my eyes. "Wlad..." I don't know what to say. Words fail me. He told his father and grandma I'd be here before I even knew of it. He bought me clothes long before I agreed to come here. I don't think he even sees our breakup as a breakup. For him it's more like time off, a break along the way.
Because we both know this is our future. Right here in this house. In this freaking walk-in wardrobe.
"I'm sure you'll find something to wear." He smirks at me but his smirk drops as I walk over to him. I pull him into a kiss, because no words could describe how I'm feeling. How safe and sound he makes me feel. How much love I feel for him. It's overwhelming. Truly overwhelming. "We will make love the whole night." I promise him.
He smiles at me, "I wouldn't stop before the sun rises anyway."
I turn around and stare at the many cashmere sweaters that are hanging in the open shelves. I slip out of my cardigan and get out of my shirt before placing them both on the cherry wooden island with a black marble countertop. I get into a beige coloured cashmere sweater that has a boat neck cut. I pull my chestnut coloured curls out of the shirt before slipping my feet into moccasins by UGG with lamb fur filling. My icy toes tingle from the warmth. The tingly sensation crawls up my legs, spine and to my heart. I am home. I know I am.
But the feeling still overwhelms me.
I turn around and stare at Wlad who put on a dark washed jeans and a navy cashmere sweater. His feet are kept warm in slippers by UGG as well.
"Ready?" I ask him, holding out my hand.
He places his hand in mine, sending shockwaves through my whole body. "As ready as I'll ever be."
The dinner with Wlad's grandma is lovely and easy going. It's clear that the ninety six year old woman is not going to live much longer, but that's not practically because she's sick. She's just old. Her joints have served her well, but even one day they're going to have enough. Her heart is a little slow, but that's expected with the age. She's an old lady after all.
But she's lovely. Natalya is absolutely lovely.
She's like the third grandma I always wanted. She welcomed me with open arms, shared embarrassing stories of Wlad's childhood over the cherry wooden dining table, causing him to redden in embarrassment and me to laugh my heart out. I can't remember the last time I laughed so hard that tears formed in my eyes. It feels like a lifetime ago. Just like her son, she doesn't judge our relationship at all. It feels bloody nice to be treated that way. Even if it's just going to last for three days.
I think she might still have a few years. She's active whenever she has the energy, those days have of coursed become more rarely, but they're still there. She doesn't smoke and doesn't drink alcohol. She has a healthy lifestyle in relation to her age and her physical state. I love her already.
Her death will shatter Wlad's world. Whenever her body decides to give up on her.
"Wlad told me you can play the piano and the guitar." Natalya says, her bright blue orbs focused on mine. Her eyes clearly haven't given up on her yet. Her long white hair is wrapped into a low bun.
After a delicious dinner we are now having tea in the living room with an open fireplace and a stunning view of the iced lake over night. "I do." I say a little surprised by her words. Clearly, she wants me to play something for her.
"And sing very well." She says with a smile on her lips.
I glance at Wlad, "I only sang for you once."
"And I will never forget the way we danced in the hallway of your hospital."
I lick my lips before turning back to Natalya. "Sure, I'll play you a song. Guitar or piano?" I'll just play one of my Mom's songs. She wrote thousands with me sitting next to her.
"Whatever you prefer, dear."
I hate Wlad for doing this to me! I rise from the couch and walkover to the piano. There's a guitar standing next to the black Bechstein piano. I stare at both instruments for a second before picking up the guitar.
"I've never sang in front of an audience. The last time I did this was when I was seven." I say as I walk back to them with the guitar in my hands. I haven't held a guitar in my hands for a long time. I sit down in front of them cross legged before playing a few notes and adjusting the guitar as it clearly hasn't been played in a while.
Suddenly, my mind is blank. I don't remember a single song my mother ever wrote, let a lone a note. Shit.
I look up at the three Krimovs sitting across me. "I've never sang in Russian." I explain as I want his grandma to understand what I'm singing. She doesn't speak English that well, so she was glad when she found out I am speaking Russian fluently.
"Adaline, just play." Wlad says to me in a soft voice.
So, I start playing a melody that comes to my mind and add words that come from my heart.
Mmm, ah
Stay right there, get away
I need space, I told you yesterday
"Slow the pace down, " then I see your face
Can we do that tomorrow? (Can we do that tomorrow?)
'Cause now you're moving in on my skin
I move back with my lips
It goes against my better judgement
'Cause I, 'cause I want it, ah
And I'm gonna be cliché here for a minute
And tell you that I've been hurt before (hurt before)
So I think I'm gonna need another minute
To not hurt no more (no more)
'Cause all I do is jump right into your arms
Every time I see you
I just wrap myself around you, yeah
Jump into something real
Even though I'm cautious, I just like the way it feels
When it's us, baby, when it's us
You make me forget that I'm not ready for love
I jump, oh, I jump
Look at me being soft
Cut it all, my mind is getting lost
From your touch, I can't afford the cost
Of me losing myself to you (losing myself to you)
And I didn't want these feelings, but I brought 'em
But I know that you know exactly when I caught 'em
And I'm trying not to think about it often, but, ooh
'Cause all I do is jump right into your arms
Every time I see you
I just wrap myself around you, yeah
Jump into something real
Even though I'm cautious, I just like the way it feels
When it's us, baby, when it's us
You make me forget that I'm not ready for love
I jump, oh, I jump
Jump, jump up in this foreign
Used to sleep on couches now, the boy is really tourin'
If they sleep on me, I tell them haters
"Go and sleep it away, " yeah
Fell in love, but it ain't no trust
If it ain't no trust, then that girl can't be my love
'Posed to put my love above
But instead you gon' sleep it away, yeah
Like a earthquake, yeah
I'm dealing with another lil' heartbreak
Man, I wish I'd never met you in the first place
And that karma gonna get you in the worst way, yeah
Don't throw your love away, don't throw your trust away
You always run away, I wish you would fucking stay
But I guess we need another break
'Cause all I do is jump right into your arms
Every time I see you, I just wrap myself around you, yeah
Jump into something real
Even though I'm cautious, I just like the way it feels
When it's us, baby, when it's us
You make me forget that I'm not ready for love
I jump, oh, I jump
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Wladimir's point of view:
She's resting her hand on my left thigh, underneath the dining table as we drink our camomile tea that's suppose to help us sleep better. My grandma went to bed a few minutes ago, but not without telling me how in awe she is of Della. I knew Adaline would mesmerise her the way she mesmerised me. She did the same to my father. He's staring more at her than me. I think he's seeing my Mom in Della. She would have loved Adaline. Sometimes I think she's giving me signs in my dreams, giving her approval. But I can't tell my Dad that I'm talking to Mom in my sleep. It'll hurt him. I don't want him to hurt. He has been through enough.
I stare at Adaline, watching her like other people watch TV. She's talking to my father about something, but my ears have stopped listening to their conversation a few minutes ago. I'm fascinated by the way her lips move when she speaks, by how every single of her 43 muscles in her face move... I love her flawless skin, her cheeks, her small nose and her dark blue eyes... I live for that sparkle in her orbs. The sparkle that's been there ever since I entered her room in Swansea. She's really engaged in the conversation as she uses her hands to talk as well, so whatever they are talking about it seems to be important to her.
After a while she stops talking and I hear my father responding, but I just can't stop staring at her. It's surreal that she's here. Here in Siberia, drinking tea with my father - talking about everything under the sun.
Suddenly, she squeezes my left thigh, ripping me out of my thoughts. She tilts her head to the side until she meets my gaze. "Stop staring at me like I'm the most interesting person on the planet. You haven't seen your father in years. He deserves your attention."
She sounds like a mixture of Troy's merciless demands and Gabriella's soft wishes. She uses harsh words but coats them in her angelic voice. She's so mesmerising...
She squeezes my thigh again, "Wlad,"
"What?" I ask her again.
She sighs, "Your Dad. Give him some of your attention. He loves you."
"I love him, too."
"Then show him that." Her dark navy orbs move across the table where my Dad's sitting at.
I finally tear my gaze off of her and look at my Dad who has an amused grin in his lips. I open my mouth to say something, but nothing comes out. There is no explanation, no excuse, nothing that could justify my behaviour. Nothing... expect "I love her." I breathe out with a shrug.
My Dad's grin widens, "Sweetheart that's as clear as the stars and moon tonight. Don't apologise for ignoring me. I get it. Really, I do. I used to do the same with your Mom when we were younger. I used to watch her talking to other people, totally fascinated by every single millimetre of her. I used to watch her sleep as well. A little excessive, I know." He shrugs. He has no idea I used to do the same. Almost every single night. "But I was so in love with her that I couldn't stop myself. And I didn't want to."
I'm so glad he understands me. He always understood me. I wouldn't be the man without him. "I love you, Dad."
He smiles at me, "I love you, too." His grey eyes soften before he looks at Adaline, "I'm going to call it a night. Make yourself at home, Adaline. I mean it. This is your home as much as it is Wlad's, Natalya's and mine. You're family."
She inhales sharply at the last sentence and then nods, "Okay. Good night, Seryozha."
"Good night." He says to both of us before getting up from his chair and walking down the hallway to his bedroom. I should visit him more often - I always think that when I'm here. He must feel lonely here without me. I mean I love my grandma, but she gave me my stubbornness that somehow skipped my Dad's generation completely. So I know she can drive him mad sometimes, just like I used to when I grew up.
"Don't beat yourself up." Her whisper rips me out of my thoughts.
"What?" I ask, looking at her again.
"You're a wonderful son. You visit him whenever you can. Don't beat yourself up for not being here more often." She rubs my left biceps, creating shivers in my body. "I really like your Dad. He's a wonderful human being. He gave you your eyes, your kindness... your patience."
"I'm not patient."
"You are with me." She whispers before pulling me into a soft kiss. "You're the most patient man I know. You have a heart that's too big to describe properly."
I chuckle, "I think you're mistaking your characteristics with mine."
She shakes her head, "No, Wlad, you are amazing. Inside and out. You are caring, protecting, loving, patient, kind..." she sighs before pressing her forehead against mine.
I get lost in her dark blue orbs that sparkle with emotion. With the same emotion I'm feeling - only I can say it out loud. Say it. I beg her with my glance.
Suddenly she blinks and when she opens her eyes again the emotion is gone. Just like the two and a half years when we were together. It was there, sitting on the tip of her tongue - but she doesn't say it out loud. "How about we stay here until the fire in the open fireplace dies?" She says instead. "We can talk about anything you like or nothing at all..."
There is one thing I want to talk about but this is not the right time. I need to have her come undone, need to have her surrender to me even more - that's the only chance I get to ask for the real reason why she broke up with me almost two years ago.
My fingers dance up and down her left arm and I watch goosebumps appearing every time I touch her with my fingertips. Every slight touch feels like tiny sparks, tiny electric shocks that causes my fingertips to tingle and her skin to create goosebumps. She's the only one who can make me feel that way. The only one...
We've spent the last hour laying on pillows in front of the open fireplace, enjoying each other's company without words. We just stared at each other and touched one another whenever the need washed over us. We never needed words to communicate. Our bodies were always the best language. Her body tells me everything I need to know. It tells me she missed my touch, she craved my touch... it tells me she missed my lips as much as I missed hers... it tells me that she likes my three day beard more than when I shave... Her body tells me she loves me just as much as I love her.
She tilts her head back to stare even deeper into my eyes. Her dark blue eyes sparkle in the light of the fire and I swear I can see the dancing flames reflecting in those orbs. She's too beautiful for her own good. She's the most stunning woman I ever met.
"Promise me to not go insane after those three days are over." She whispers as she touches me left cheek with her long and slim fingers.
I can feel her forefinger running over my lips, "Only if you stop screwing your life up."
She smiles at me, "Deal."
"Deal." I repeat before grabbing her hand and kissing her fingertips. I missed doing this... I missed her so much... "Why did you start taking drugs anyway?"
She sighs, "Trust me, you don't want to know."
"You'd say you would talk about anything with me."
She smirks at me before pulling her hand out of my grip. She wraps her left leg around my hips, being even closer to me now. "The night we danced in that club... the night you kissed me... six months after we broke up... Remember the photos?"
How could I ever forget those images. "I took care of those bastards."
"I know... but that night... apparently we did drugs that night. Cocaine. I'm pretty sure it was cocaine. The morning afterwards I went to work and first everything was fine... everything was normal, like it always had been... but then I went into the OR... and suddenly my focus was sharper than ever. I stopped focusing on everyone and everything around me, but instead I only saw the patient in front of me. The problem I had to fix." She shrugs, "Most people experience hallucinations but I... I guess, I have my very own kind of high. That got me hooked."
I stare at her in disbelief. She got addicted because of her work?!
"I started experimenting with different drugs." Her fingers run through my hair as she stares me in the eyes, "I ended up with a mixture of oxcycodone and crack. I got caught during a random blood test."
"Would you consider yourself an addict?"
She shrugs, "I can do without them... it's just different with them. It was new, exciting... it was a change of scenery. It helped me forget the heartache... that excruciating pain." She gulps as the emotions arise in her eyes. "The last year and a half hasn't been easy for me either."
I kiss her softly, tasting the saltiness from her tears. I hate seeing her in pain, far more than being in pain myself. "Your turn to question me."
Della stares at me for a long time, so long that I'm starting to think she didn't hear me. But suddenly she gulps and inhales deeply. "Is Natasha still in your life?"
Out of all questions she could have asked... she chose this one first? "Yes."
She smiles in relief. "I'm glad."
What?! "I don't understand."
"She's your drug cocktail. She's easing the heartache for you."
She does. But she's nothing more. "I don't love her."
"I know and I'll make sure you won't."
Adaline's point of view:
We are a mess full of tangled limbs on the bed. Wrapped into one another we stare into each other's eyes. I climaxed so many times that I lost count. I held back at first, although he told me his father and grandma sleep three floors beneath us in the right wing of the house - practically miles away from us. I was still unsure if they could hear us - and then he told me that this room was soundproof. From there on, there was no holding back. For both of us.
We loved, touched, kissed and fucked like our lives depend on it. Because they sort of do. We only have three days and we sure as hell won't waste a second without one another.
The moon and stars are shining into the room, coating our bedroom in dimmed lights. I brush through his dark brown hair, not believing we're really here. Just 24 hours ago I was still in Swansea, still stuck in that rehab centre. I was in therapy, going from single sessions with Dr. Martin to yoga and pilates classes in the backyard. I painted with oil - horrible, horrible paintings but I painted. I wrote songs using the piano in the sun room. I wrote songs about my feelings for this man. The very same man I am sharing a bed with. The love of my life.
The love of my life.
"I missed this." I whisper. I could stare at his light grey orbs for hours. I never want to leave this place. Not his arms. Not this bed. Not this house or country. I want to stay here forever.
And I know one day I will. I saw it. It was so real that I could almost grab it.
It was the best thing I ever saw. No beating heart, no pulsing nerve, no cleft repair will ever look brighter than my future with him.
"Me, too." He says, fondling my cheeks. "I'm sorry for what I said the last time we were together."
I brush through his hair, "I'm sorry as well. I was hurt. You were angry."
He licks his lips, his mind probably wandering to this day when he fucked me in my father's study. "I will never treat you this way again." He promises me.
"I know." I stare deeply into his light grey orbs that sparkle. "I wish we could stay this way."
"We can."
"No, we can't."
His features hardens for a second before relaxing again, "Why?"
"You know why."
"No, I don't. You never gave me a reason. You just said it wasn't my fault."
"And it's not. Believe me, this is all on me."
"Give me a reason. A proper reason."
I sigh, "I can't."
"Yes, you can."
He's going to think I'm selfish. Egoistic. Because I am. "Parkinson's."
"What?"
"I'm this close to healing that bastard. I was working with Fleming before this scandal. We put our heads together and we finished the preclinical phase. We were just about to start phase two, when they caught me working on drugs." I bite my lip. Fleming told me he would continue this trial without me until I was out of rehab. Without me he wouldn't be this far and he knows that. "The ten people we gave the medication have responded well. Fleming send me the report the day before you visited me. It's working. Our virus is working."
"You're healing Parkinson's." He breathes out shocked.
"I'm on my way. If all goes well, in maybe four years our medication can go public." I tell him, "Maybe a bit less if we put in the extra effort. In the next phases we will increase the number of patients and look for side effects, but it looks good."
"How many people know about this?"
"Just you and Sophie. And my Mom. Fleming and me agreed to not tell anyone until we can go public with it. I'm financing this out of my own pocket, the hospital doesn't know what we're doing exactly. It's more my clinical trail than his, but without his puzzle piece we would have never come this far. The material is still too sensitive to let people know."
A grin full of amazement fills his face, "Adaline, this is amazing!"
"I know, but we're not done yet. It's a long road ahead and I can't stop now. Not when we're so close to healing that bastard." I let my fingertips run down the right side of his face. "I can't torture you in the meantime. I'm barely at home. I practically live in the hospital, more than I did before. I am putting my life on hold until I healed Parkinson's. But I can't ask you to do the same from me. You deserve more than someone like me. You deserve someone who loves you from up close not from far away. I can't be who you need me to be. I can't be myself when I'm without but I also can't be myself with you. I can't allow my feelings to distract me from my goal." I stop talking as I feel tears rolling down my cheeks. I didn't even realise I was crying. "Trust me when I say I don't like to be apart from you, but there's no other way."
He wipes away the rolling tears from my cheeks, "Okay."
"Okay?"
"We'll enjoy these days here before we have to part our ways again."
Wladimir's point of view:
The rising sun starts coating the bedroom in stunning pastel colours. I missed this view so badly. But I missed the woman next to me far more. My world wasn't the same without her in it. I wasn't the same. I was angry and I constantly lashed out on my employees.
I was mad at everyone because she left me.
I let my eyes travel from the stunning white coated pines that are glittering in pale pinks and oranges over to the sleeping woman in my arms. She's wrapped closely around my body. Her left leg is hooked around my hip, her voluminous tits are pressed into my chest, her hands are wrapped around me. I watch her sleeping peacefully. Her smell starts filling my nostrils. Blueberries and warm summer nights mixed with the pine smell from this house. She used to bring back my best childhood memories but now she reminds me of our day yesterday. In sixteen years of protecting her, two out of those of being in a relationship with her, she has never been this open towards me. She saw our future. Children. Three children.
She gave me a heart attack with her words.
I love her and I will do anything in my power to make sure the future she saw comes true. I always wanted to grow old here on this property with my partner. Only when I build this house I had no idea who that partner would be. Never in the world would I have guessed it would be Adaline, Troy's and Gabriella's daughter.
But the heart wants what it wants.
And my heart wants her. All of her.
Whenever she's ready.
I wish I needed her a little less, just enough to make it bearable.
After a while I can't hold a self back anymore, so I seal my lips over hers, slowly awakening her. It takes her a moment to react, but eventually she does. I used to kiss her awake when we were still together and I appreciate the privilege to do so again after one and a half years. I roll her on her back as our kiss starts gaining passion. Her hands start running down my back, her nails creating valleys on my skin. I missed this feeling so much. We used to have lazy morning sex and stunning goodnight sex. We had a kind of sex life people say is crazy, but for us... for us it was normality. Until she ended us. Until abruptly, my whole world stopped spinning.
But now, right here, we're what we are meant to be. Together.
A feast for my dick. I spread her legs apart with mine and she lets go of my lips.
"Wlad," her navy orbs stare into mine, still full of sleep.
"I love you." I whisper.
She pulls me into another kiss as I slowly push through her slickness. She's just as tight as I remembered. It's heavenly.
She moans into my mouth before suddenly letting go. The look in her eyes says more than a thousand words.
She loves me, too.
But Parkinson is between us. The bastard she's healing. The bastard that killed my mom.
And she's making sure to eradicate.
How can I not love her?
She's my very own super woman. In a Victoria's Secret costume.
I'm the luckiest man on the planet.
Adaline's point of view:
I tilt my head back, enjoying the hot water touching my skin. My body is so sore that I'm not sure if I can walk down all these stairs to have breakfast with Wlad and his family. I wash my body and hair throughly. I missed being so sore, I missed waking up to morning sex. I missed going to sleep with the heavy smell of sex lingering in the room. I missed his touch, his smell, his smile... I missed him so badly that I'm not sure if I can part us a second time. In two days this will be over. But I don't know if I survive leaving him another time.
Last time was hard enough. But now? How am I suppose to leave him after this? I mean three days aren't even over yet and I'm already hurting from the decision I know I have to make.
I turn off the water and squeeze the excess water out of my hair. I open the glass shower door in this white marbled bathroom and step out. I wrap my body and hair in white fluffy towels and gasp at the view in front of me. The French windows offer me a view over the pines that are coated in a thick layer of snow. The Ural Mountains are on the horizon. The sun is peaking through the clouds, which are pregnant with snow. It didn't snow yesterday. It will look stunning.
I towel dry my body before getting into my underwear. I start drying my hair with a blow drier, staring at myself in the reflection of the mirror. I can't believe I am here.
It feels like a dream.
But it feels like home as well.
I jump down the last few stairs in my thick leggings and wide grey cashmere sweater. My feet are warm in UGG boots. It's chillier down here than up where we slept. I walk into the living room where the open fireplace is already lit and stop at the stunning view in front of me again. This time I'm just seeing the lake that's frozen. A layer of snow is on the ice. It looks stunning. That's the reason why I love winter. I don't get these kind of views in the summer. Or anywhere else.
Suddenly, Russian voices fill my ears from the kitchen.
"She's stunning." Sergei says to his son.
I walk around the dinning table and decide to eavesdrop on their conversation as I never heard Wlad talk to anyone about me. Because he couldn't. But those rules don't apply here. Here, there are no rules.
"She's amazing." Wlad agrees with a smile on his lips. It's that same smile my father has on his lips whenever he talks about Mom.
"Your grandma likes her as well. She's a keeper."
I sure as hell am! Wlad chuckles, "She would agree with you." Wlad knows me well.
"Don't let go of her."
"I'm not planning to. I'll marry her."
"I know. I can see it in your eyes and hers as well. You're soulmates."
My dad says the same about him and my Mom. She told me once that she didn't believe him in the beginning, but over the years he convinced her. Wlad doesn't need years to convince me. I might not believe in God, but I sure as hell believe in soulmates. Especially as I saw it happening in Marrakech right in front of my eyes.
I inhale deeply before walking into the rustic style kitchen. "Morning!" The smell of coffee starts filling my nose right away. Coffee!
I walk over to Wlad and grab his cup out of his hand before taking a sip. I'm not awake before my first cup of coffee.
"Good morning, Adaline. How did you sleep?" Sergei asks me with a smile on his lips.
"I've rarely slept better." I say with a smile. I've also rarely slept so little and was so happy about it. "I love it here. It's so peaceful..."
"I'm glad you're enjoying your stay. Wlad hasn't been here a lot in the last years."
I have a feeling I'm the one to blame. "What's on the plan for today?"
"Whatever you want to do." Sergei answers my question.
I think for a moment. "We should drive to a car seller. You guys need to get better cars. I would suggest Range Rovers or Jeeps."
Sergei stares at me confused before looking at his son. "Is she always like this?"
Wlad chuckles before embracing me with one arm. He looks down at me, "You have basically whole Siberia in front of your feet and you decide to go car shopping?"
"Well, we can order them online or over the phone if it makes you feel better. But those Ladas need to be stored in the garage."
Wlad grins at me.
"What?"
"You sound like your Dad."
"Because I'm concerned about your safety? Look around yourself, there's nothing but woods around you guys for miles! You need proper cars." I look back at Sergei, "How far away is the car seller? Can we leave your Mom for this long? When's the nurse coming?"
Sergei chuckles. "Martha will be here in an hour. The car seller's a bit too far away to go look at cars."
"Well than you should call the nearest seller and demand him to come here." Demand him to come here. I really do sound like my Dad.
"Which colour do you prefer?" Sergei asks.
I furrow my brows at his question. He thinks this is about the right colour? "Sergei, this is not about the colour. I couldn't care less about the colour. This is about what's beneath the hood, the wheels and the interior. You guys need proper cars. Badly."
"We'll get new cars. How about a walk on the property?"
I follow the footsteps in the snow, that both Krimov men left. Wlad has the same shoe size as his father. Both of them are carrying guns but refused to give me one as well. I know how to handle a weapon, I train yearly with my father. I know how to shoot and how to properly hold a gun. But they refused to give me one nevertheless. After having breakfast with Natalya we decided to go for a hike around the property. With 8,000 hectares there's a lot to discover.
"You sure there are no grey wolves somewhere around? Or brown bears? Or the Siberian tiger?" I ask them as we march through the pine woods. I don't know much about Siberia as I never had any interest in getting to know the area my man is from, but this is changing now. Even if it's just for another day. It's such a deliberating feeling to be able to walk here. With no one watching every step I take or every move I make. Wlad's of course watching, although he's in a deep conversation with his father a few meters in front of me.
He never let me out of his sight. Only here.
On his property.
In his sanctuary.
I feel privileged. Thanks to Wlad, I have the thickest clothes to keep me warm. I'm bundled up in a cashmere sweater underneath my down feathered coat. My feet are warm in UGG boots and a grey beanie is making sure my ears don't cool down. It's minus eleven degrees Celsius here - in October. The snow hasn't started to fall down yet, but it's only a matter of minutes. Falling snow is one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen. I look to my right and see the glittering lake. A thick layer of ice has covered the lake with a thin blanket of snow. "Hey, do you think we could go ice skating later on?" I ask them both although I know they won't hear me. I'm not used to getting ignored by Wlad. It feels nice.
The next thirty five minutes I spent staring at the backsides of the two Krimov men as we march through the snow. They look very much alike and I would like to know which features Wlad inherited from his mother. Has he her smile? Her cheekbones? Her stubbornness?
I should ask Sergei for a photo of her. I don't even know what she looks like.
Suddenly, I bump into Wlad and Sergei. My gaze was turned to the stunning lake. "What?" I ask them both as they stare at something in front of me. As both men are taller than me, I can't see anything. "What are you staring at?"
"Sh!" Sergei shuts me off.
I frown before lifting my left foot to step next to them. Wlad's arm wraps around me before I can do another move. "Don't move." He whispers to me.
I listen because I don't think it would be smart to not listen to him right now. Being my curious self, I bend to the left, using my core to stabilise my body.
And then I see it.
A Siberian tiger!
A freaking Siberian tiger about twenty meters in front of me. I can't believe my eyes! Magnificent, yet endangered, it is estimated only 500 or so of these beautiful beasts remain in the wild, their numbers declining thanks to poaching and the logging of their habitat. Also known as the Amur tiger, these solitary animals live in some of the most remote birch forests and woodlands in Siberia's southeast. Hunted down so that only around 40 remained in the wild in the 1940s, Russia was the first country to grant the animal full protection.
A Siberian tiger is standing in front of me. A three meter long beauty that must weigh about 270 kilograms. One of about 500.
What are the odds to come face to face with a wild beauty like this? I mean, we are in southeast Siberia and this is a 8000 hectares property.
Still, I'm breathless. Amazed by nature.
Suddenly, Sergei gets out his hunting gun.
"No!" I hiss at him so loudly that the birds start flying out of the trees. The Siberian tiger is off before I can look at it for another time. "Are you insane?!"
"He could have hurt us!" Sergei puts the gun away and turns around to face me.
"He's under full animal protection! A wild animal like this shouldn't face death like this." I hiss at him. How dare he even think of killing it!
Sergei opens his mouth, but his son interrupts him, "We should head back."
Sergei looks at me for another second before looking back at Wlad. "She's like a copy of her."
Of who? Of his mother? Are we alike? I open my mouth to ask him my questions.
"I know." Wlad says with a shrug before wrapping his arm around my waist.
I decide to hold my tongue. I don't think both Krimov men want to talk about the woman they loved so deeply. At least not yet.
We march through the snow as it suddenly starts to snow. Very heavily.
I am in heaven.
In my own paradise, the deepest winter here in Siberia. Held by the man I love.
There's no place I'd rather be.
I lean against his hard chest as we stare at the open fireplace that's lit in the living room. I watch the flames dancing and the fire cracking noises fill my ears. The snow is still falling heavily outside of the cocoon we call home. It's beautiful here.
"What's your mind?" Wlad rests his head on my right shoulder as he wraps his arms around my body, holding me close.
"I don't want to go home. Not tomorrow evening. Not ever." I breathe out before looking through the three floor to ceiling windows. It's dark outside but the snow hasn't stopped falling. It's so pretty. I feel so at home, so at peace...
"I know, but you can't stay here as well. As you said, there's a judge visiting you and calling in weekly."
I sigh and place my hands on his forearms. "I don't think I can let you go another time. Not after these three days." His grip around my tightens.
"But you will." He whispers.
I nod, "I have no other choice."
He kisses my right cheek, "I know. It's why I love you."
"How can you love me if I break your heart?" I tilt my head to the side to see him clearly.
"Because you're the most altruistic woman I ever met. You remind me of my mother - in almost everything you do. She used to be like this as well."
I'm like his mother? "Really? Are we so much alike?"
He nods, "She would have loved you. She was selfless and a brilliant cook. She was stubborn, she always spoke her mind no matter whom she hurt with her words. She was honest and loyal. She was passionate in everything she did, just like you. She was beautiful with her dark blue eyes and light brown hair. I inherited her discipline and her way of loving, but sadly none of her looks. I have this birthmark on the back of my neck, right underneath my hairline, that she had as well. It's the only thing I inherited from her." I know that birthmark. It looks like a heart. It's the size of my thumb. I smiled the first time I saw it and kissed it. I had no idea his mother had the same birthmark. "She loved with her whole heart, just like I love you. You can hurt me as much as you want - and I still wouldn't leave you. I never will. You can break up with me, but there is no end to us. We belong together. You and I know this. I don't care that you put us on a break for finding a cure for Parkinson's. In fact I admire you for that. It makes me love you even more, if that's even possible."
"So, you fell in love with your Mom?"
He chuckles, "Della, I just confessed my eternal love for you and that's all you heard?"
I turn around and cup his face, "It's the biggest compliment you've ever given me."
"Adaline," I hear Sergei calling my name.
I turn around at the sound of my name, "Yes?"
"Natalya would like to talk to you."
I frown. His Mom wants to talk to me? "Okay..."
"Down the hallway, last door on the right." His grey eyes are soft.
I nod before waking down the hallway, leaving both Krimov men alone in the living room. Natalya could have talked to me over dinner, but clearly this is too sensitive for her to say in front of her son and grandson. I don't know why but it makes me nervous. Really nervous. I pass several closed wooden doors before reaching her door. I inhale, knock and open the door. I've never been in here before. There are French windows in front of me, showing me the iced lake and the falling snow. Her king sized bed is to my left. She looks lost in it. "You wanted to see me?"
She nods, "Please close the door."
I do as she asked me to before walking over to her. Natalya's eyes are as grey as Wlad's. Her silver hair is braided into one thick braid. She's already ready for bed although it's only eight. But she must be tired. Being nearly 100, I understand.
"Sit down." She pats on the spot next to her.
I feel my heart pumping hard in my chest as I sit down next to her. Why am I having such a bad feeling about this?
"I don't know how much time I still have, so I thought I'd give you my advice while I still can." She says slowly, her grey eyes focused on me. "Don't waste your time apart from him."
The word shoot straight into my heart. It's like she knows everything that has happened between us although I know Wlad would never tell her. He's a very private person and I am as well. It's why we fit so perfectly. "Natalya,"
She shakes her head and places her hands on mine, "Allow yourself to love him. I know you want to. I can see it in your eyes, I can see it in your smile... I can see it in your heart. Your heart is bigger than his, bigger than all of ours combined. Love him, love him until your last breath."
I feel tears rolling down my cheeks, "I can't." My lower lip starts trembling, so I bite on it. "I can't focus when I love him so much. I can't think, I can't work, when I choose to let him in."
"He's your soulmate. Trust me, I see when soulmates find each other. I saw it when I found my husband and I saw it when my son met his wife. And I see it right now. You are soulmates. Who gives a fuck about the age gap? Your love is greater than this. Greater than anything."
I shake my head, "Not now. Not until..."
"Until what?"
"Until I've healed Parkinson's."
"Parkinson's?" She looks shocked. "Lydia died because of that."
Lydia. Wlad's mother's name was Lydia. "I can't turn my back on those patients. They suffer. Every minute, every second I waste being happy with him, they suffer. From immense pain. Physically and emotionally. I have to stop it. And I'm close." I start explaining, "The medication I developed with a colleague is working. We're testing it on patients already. In a few years we can go public with it. And maybe in a few decades no one will suffer from it."
"You want to eradicate it."
I nod, "As much as I love him. I want this to stop. The whole world is suffering. I want to heal Parkinson's and Alzheimer's, but Parkinson's is up first on my list."
"Alzheimer's as well?"
I shrug, "It's as much of a bitch as Parkinson's, isn't it?"
She smiles at me, "You're amazing."
I chuckle, "I'm alright. I think your grandson can live a happy life with me. Whenever I'm ready."
She squeezes my hands, "You can have a career and love at the same time in your life, Adaline. You don't have to choose between one or the other."
I shake my head, "No, I do. You don't understand, I can't think of anything but him! I can't sleep, eat or breathe without him on my mind. I can't work, I can't dedicate my time to those who need it the most, when all I think of is him."
"How long were you guys broken up before he brought you here?"
Her question surprises me. How can she read between the lines so well? "A year and a half."
"And did it help you in any way? Did you had your breakthrough in your trail?"
"Yes, I did."
She nods, "But you realise that you're not only hurting yourself by being apart from him, but him as well, do you? You don't want him to wait for you, but that's what he's going to do. He won't find himself another woman to love, because there won't be another. He may find someone to spend the night with because he's a man after all, but love... he will always love you."
I gulp, "He wants children. I can't give him children yet."
"He knows that. Just like he knows that you love him as well although you've never said it back."
I gasp, "You think so?"
Her grey eyes soften, "Of course he does. Your hearts beat in the same rhythm. You are one. There is no him without you, just like there is no you without him. The sooner you realise it, the sooner you can have your happily ever after."
I finish my black coffee, staring outside the windows in the kitchen as I sit at the kitchen island on a barstool. I woke up in the early hours and watched the sun rising above the lake and the Ural Mountains. The way the pastel coloured rays of the sun filled the the whole house was stunning. I spent a few minutes outside in the backyard, hearing the birds morning greetings until I was freezing and had to head back inside.
The whole house is still asleep and I love the silence. It's peaceful, reassuring... heavenly.
"Morning."
I wince at Sergei's voice. I didn't even hear him coming into the kitchen.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you." He apologises as he gets out a mug from one of the hanging dark cherry wooden cupboards. He's still in his navy fleece pyjamas and warm slippers. Just like me.
"I just didn't realise you're a morning bird as well." I say with a smile on my lips.
He fills his mug with the coffee that I brewed earlier. It's still hot. "I like to watch the sun rising when I'm still in bed. But as soon as it's risen, I get up and have my first cup of coffee." He walks over to me and sits down next to me. "A habit I can't kick no matter how hard I try."
"I watched the sun rising in the living room today. I even dared to spent a few minutes out in the cold. It was magical. I wish I could see that every day."
He smiles at me. "My wife used to love the sunrises as well."
"What was she like?"
"She was..." he pauses for a moment, "indescribable. Kind of like you."
"Wlad said we're alike."
Sergei's grey eyes sparkle. "You are. Very much." He smiles at me. "She was very passionate about everything and she loved the simple things in life. Like cooking or watching the sunrise every morning. She enjoyed the outside. Hiking, ice skating, biking, swimming - as long as it was something active and outside she loved it. She even went fishing with me. She woke up at three thirty or four without complaining and sat with me by the water. She made us coffee and packed breakfast."
"You didn't live here?"
"No, Wlad bought this land just a few years ago. We used to live in a tiny village with a few hundreds of people living there."
"So he built the house for you and your mother?"
He shrugs, "I thought it was excessive to build a huge house like this for only two people. I mean, there are sixteen bedrooms in this house. Sixteen!"
I smirk, "I have four siblings alone."
"Sometimes it feels like I'm living in a hotel rather than a home."
"I'm sure that's because of the cleaning staff that keep this house in top shape." I counter.
He chuckles, "Lydia would have loved you."
It's such a wonderful name. Wlad never told me her name, but I never asked. Talking about her used to hurt him and I don't want to cause him any pain. "Where is she buried? I'd like to visit her grave if it's possible."
"She's buried in her hometown. Next to her parents."
"Is it far away from here?"
"No. A two hour drive from here."
Considering the distances here it's really not that far away. "I want to visit her today." It's my last day here and it feels right. I may not be able to meet her, but I still want to pay my respect to the woman who raised a breathtaking man. I want to thank her for gifting him life.
"You will." He promises me before taking a sip of his coffee.
"How was Wlad growing up?"
Sergei smiles as memories start floating his mind. "Not much different than he is now." He says, "He didn't mock anyone growing up. He really loved his Persian cat, Снежика."
I nod, "He told me he had a cat growing up. He really loved her."
"Those two were inserepable. She even bathed with him when he was still little. I've never seen that before. Wherever he went, she was right beside him. My wife brought the kitten home one day. She found her on the streets. The little kitten was barely breathing. It was shaking and full of dirt. I didn't think the cat would make it through the night but Wlad and Lydia stayed up the whole night and fed her, cuddled with her and kept her alive that way. Wlad has his compassion from my wife - I'm far more realistic."
"Like me."
He nods, "I think that's why you're so compatible. You highlight each other's strengths and you balance out your weaknesses. His strength is your weakness. Your strength is his weakness."
"And what's that?"
"He calms you down. He is your home, your ultimate destination. He makes your heart race, he spikes up your adrenaline without you needing to take anything. He stabilises you."
I stare at him in shock. He knows I took drugs. He knows we broke up. How can he know that? "You know..."
"Of course I know. My son has been miserable in the last year and a half. He always talked very little but the few words he did share over the phone with me... You broke up. You tore him apart. You caused him a kind of heartache that won't heal."
I gulp. Shit.
"And now he's here with you. He's glowing from within. He's glowing like his Mom was when she was still alive. He's only happy with you. So don't break him another time - because I know he won't survive it, Adaline. I meant what I said, you are family. You know it, I know it and Wlad knows it, too. You may not be married, but that doesn't matter because your feelings are bloody obvious. You love him and he loves you. Stop playing games with him. Don't treat him like a doll that you stopped liking out of the sudden. He's my son and he hasn't lost his heart once in forty two years - but he did loose it to you. Or he gave it to you. Or you took it. I don't care which. But I'm begging you, be with him and stop treating him like dirt."
"You don't know what you're talking about. My relationship with Wlad is exactly that - mine. Don't put your nose in it and don't you dare try to interfere-"
"I am protecting what you left of him!"
Suddenly, I rise from the chair. "I am not the bad one in this."
"He did nothing wrong. All he does is love you and you-"
"And you think I don't?!" I hiss back at him. "Do you really think I enjoy breaking him?! Do you think I'm some sociopath - I don't get off on it! I hate hurting him. I hate-"
"Then why are you doing this?!" He yells at me, making me wince.
"I don't need to give you a reason! I don't have to justify my actions towards you. Not when they only concern your son and me. You think I broke him?! Look at him! He doesn't seem broken to me."
"Not right now but once you leave-"
"Sergei, I'm saying this with deep respect: FUCK OFF!" I yell so loudly that he winces. "You have no idea what I'm going through. You have no idea what your son's going through. You have no idea what our relationship is like! You don't know how deeply connected we are. You think I broke up with him because I like playing games?! I am not playing games with his heart! I love him on levels you will never understand! I love him so madly that a break up is impossible! My heart swells up every time I feel him in a room with me. My knees grow weak, my hands start sweating and fucking butterflies go crazy in my stomach. I love him so much that I can't say it to his face! I can't tell him how I feel because those words don't even grasp a fraction of my emotions!"
Suddenly Sergei smiles at me. "See? That's your weakness and his strength."
I frown, "What?"
"You're a coward when it comes to your emotions. You admit them to everyone - expect to the person you feel them for."
"You did this to provoke me?" I ask him shocked. He played me?
He shakes his head, "No. I meant what I said. I just wanted to see how far you'd go to protect him."
"I'd give my life for him."
"Yet you're not telling him how you feel."
"It's complicated." I say before sitting down on the chair again. "Admitting how I feel would change too much. I couldn't do what I'm doing right now if he knew I loved him as much as I do. First I need to... I need to finish what I started, then I can tell him."
"One step at a time?"
I shrug, "Otherwise I'd stumble and fall."
I can't love him and heal Parkinson's at the same time.
I stop in front of her oval white marbled gravestone. Lydia Krimov. A woman I never met, yet I feel like I owe her so much. Wlad lays a single red rose in front of her gravestone. She's laying next to her parents, Wlad's grandparents. I'm standing between the two Krimov men as we all pay our respect to that magnificent woman. Snow has started to fall from the sky. Neither of us says anything for minutes. I wish I could have met her. I wish I could thank her in person.
"I'm going to head back to the car." Sergei says to us.
Wlad nods. I feel the warmth coming from his hand. He hasn't let go of my hand ever since we climbed out of the car. It must be hard for him to be here. Just like for Sergei. I hope I didn't ask too much of them.
"Can you give me a moment alone with her?" I ask Wlad after another five minutes have passed.
"Yeah, sure." He lets go of my hand and walks over to the gravestone. I watch him placing his hand on the stone and telling her how much he loves her before leaving me alone.
I gulp down the golf ball in my throat. "I want to thank you for bringing this wonderful man into this world." I tell her, "He hasn't forgotten you, but I'm sure you know that. He's the love of my life, the father of my future children..." I lick my lips, "I'm so sorry that Parkinson's shortened your life so drastically. I'll kill this disease, I promise you. I will eradicate it. In half a decade no one will even know what this disease is. No one will suffer as much as you did ever again. My partner and I are doing really well, in a few years we can go public with our medication. Parkinson's may have taken your life, but I refuse to let it take another life. Not as long as I can do something about." I inhale deeply, "I can't promise you that I won't hurt your son. Because I will. I have to. Healing this disease requires sacrifices. I can't do both. But I want you to know, I'm hurt as well. I don't want to leave him..." I feel tears rolling down my cheeks, "I will come back to him. I will make him happy again. I will gift him children. At least three." I smile at my own words, " I will love him more than he loves me, because I already do. I will be there for him. I will be by his side, step by step. Just not now... Not until I've eradicated what killed you." I promise her, placing my hand on the gravestone. "I will bring down the stars and moon for him. I will do anything for him. But just give me some time... give me time to change people's destinies." I inhale deeply before turning on my heel. I walk through the cemetery, following Wlad's footsteps in the snow. I wipe away the tears that roll down my face. I'm grieving for losing someone I didn't even know. I'm grieving for a lost I didn't experience. I grieve for a meeting that will never happen.
Wlad is leaning against the dark navy Lada, while Sergei is already inside. It's icy cold here as we're about four hundred kilometres up north, but Wlad prefers to wait for me in the cold rather than the heated car. Dressed in black clothes he looks breathtaking. It's the perfect contrast to the white snow and the icy grey in his orbs.
I walk faster and wrap my arms around his torso as soon as I reach him. I pull him into a passionate kiss, not caring if Sergei sees us or not. He returns my kiss, probably tasting the salt from my tears. His arms wrap around my waist like ropes made of steel before lifting me in the air. The coldness around me disappears, even the falling snow flakes disappear as I get lost in his kiss... in his love.
After minutes, he pulls away first.
"Thank you." I whisper, staring deeply into his silver orbs.
"For what?"
"For bringing me here. For allowing me to meet your grandmother and your mother. For giving me the chance to voice my gratitude towards your Mom. For... For taking care of me. For looking out for me. For protecting me. For loving me." I gulp and brush through his hair that's wet from the snow, "For being in my life. For... for everything, Wlad." I whisper the last words because my voice breaks from the emotions I feel. It's so hard to describe what I feel for him.
A thin film of tears covers his eyes, but he doesn't blink to move it away. He wants me to see how I make I'm feel. "I love you, Adaline."
I nod as I fondle his right cheek, "I know." I say with tears in my eyes.
I love him more than he knows.
Wladimir's point of view:
I stop at the jetty, having my ice skating shoes on my left shoulder. It's icy cold but of course only a woman like Adaline would be brave enough to go ice skating in these freezing temperatures. I always wanted to go ice skating with her in London but we never had the chance. Because we had to hide. Because we broke up.
But now... now she's floating over the lake, performing a kind of dance like I've never seen before. She looks so free... so peacefully... so Adaline.
God, I love this woman.
She skates over to me in a fast speed before stopping right across. "Get your feet into those shoes. Come on!" She urges me with a grin on her lips.
I can't help but return her grin. "You're really enjoying these cold temperatures, aren't you?"
She grins at me, "I think I was made for this coldness. I was made for this place, Wlad. I was made for..." She inhales deeply and I can see the emotions in her eyes. "For you, Wlad. You are my destiny, my home. My future... you're my universe."
Sweet Jesus. This woman can't tell me she loves me but she doesn't even have to. Not when she can declare her love for me so easily. "Adaline..." Ever since we came back from visiting my Mom she's been different. She's clung to me like never before... like she's no longer afraid of anything. As she should be. There's nothing and no one she has to fear.
She smiles at me. "I know... I know." She repeats before kissing me softly. Only with these shoes on, she's at my eye level. "I know, Солношка."
I cup her face and stare into her navy eyes. They're sparkling like never before. "You love me not less than I love you." I think out loud.
She gulps before closing her eyes. She wraps her hands around my wrists as she presses her forehead against mine.
I can't take my eyes off of her. She loves me - and she knows it. I know it, too. It's time to admit her feelings towards me. It's time.
It's the perfect time. The perfect place. The perfect moment.
What else can she ask for?
Suddenly, a single tear starts rolling down her left cheek.
She's not ready.
I wipe the tear away with my thumb. Her lips touch mine and she kisses me with a kind of softness she has never before. "How am I suppose to leave you now?"
I have no idea. "I love you, Adaline. Even if you do leave me."
She opens her eyes, revealing the thin film of moisture that's still coating her dark blue orbs. "That's why it's so hard."
I agree with her on that one. "I'll never stop loving you. No matter what you do."
"Wlad, stop..." she begs me. "Stop putting pressure on me."
"I'm not doing this on purpose."
"Wladimir Krimov..." she sighs. "The things you do to me..."
She has no idea what she's doing to me.
I place the old brown leathered photo album on her lap. My Dad dug this out. It's full of photos from my parents and my childhood. Full of those carefree, happy memories. I have digital copies of those photos on various hard drives at home in London. I like to scroll through them on her birthday and my parents' wedding day. Along with a glass of Vodka. Those are the only two days when I usually need to be alone.
Her slim long fingers touch the scratched leather of the photo album as her eyes read my parents' names that are stitched in Cyrillic on the leather. Some of these photos are as old as me, others even older. Della's fingers start shaking out of the sudden and she inhales deeply before opening the photo album. She must known of the privilege she has been given.
I can't say a word. My throat is tight and it feels like there's a lump the size of a bear in it. I've never shown photos my mother to anyone. No one has seen those photos. No one but my family
That Adaline is a part of.
Her navy eyes sparkle with emotion as she sees the first photo. A black and white image of my Dad and Mom on their wedding day. She wore a stunning lace dress while my Dad wore the standard black suit. I don't look at the photo. I memorised it.
I'd rather watch her.
"Oh, she was a very pretty woman..." her angelic voice reaches my ears just as her lips form a smile. She flips the page and sees the first colourful photo. It was taken while she was thirty weeks pregnant with me. My Dad took that photo during a walk through the woods in the summer. She's grinning into the camera while holding on to her bump, on to me. She's dressed in a purple dress. It was taken in stunning lightning, so her dark blue eyes shine as much as her wide smile does. Her light brown hair is open and wavy... Whenever I see this photo I can hear her laughter in my ears and almost feel her arms around me. It makes me feel loved, safe... "Wlad, your Mom was stunning!" She says before looking up at her. There's a smile on her lips that reaches her eyes, which sparkle.
Adaline makes me feel loved and safe every time she looks at me. She's the only woman that could ever arise those feelings within me. The only one besides my Mom.
I fondle her left cheek and feel how my heart skips three beats. "Sometimes when you look at me like that, my heart skips three beats at a time. My Mom once told me that her heart did the same when my Dad touched her in a special kind of way."
She gulps down the tears in her eyes. "Is this why I remind you of her?"
I nod, "That and some of your characteristics. I think this is her way of telling me this is right. That this is the real thing... that we are meant to be. It's her way of making sure I'm happy from above."
She places her hand on mine and squeezes it gently, "I may not believe in God but I think that's a very lovely way of thinking. I'm sure your Mom is somewhere smiling down at us. I can't tell you she's up there standing next to angels or God, but I'm pretty sure she's still having an eye on you to make sure you are happy."
"I love you."
She smiles at me again, "I know. And that heartbeat skipping you were talking about - my heart does it too. It skips three beats, not just one. So maybe she's sending us both some kind of message this way."
Adaline's point of view:
I take another sip of my red wine, enjoying these last moments here. I loved every second in Siberia and I know I will be back. I saw it after all.
I stare at Wladimir's face, trying to memorise this look of pure happiness because I won't see it in years. He's in a conversation with his Dad but my eyes blend out the words. I love how his lips form words, how his eyes react to his father's words and how his hand is safely wrapped around mine like it's the most normal thing in the world to be having dinner with his father and his girlfriend. But for the last three days, this was normality. This beautiful little things I always wished for when we were still together, were suddenly normal. And it felt good. So good!
It's my last evening with him. I try to not feel too sad about it. After all, I promised his mother that I'll make him happy again - and Boltons don't break their promises. But it's such a bittersweet dinner. I don't want to leave this place and the people who live here. They've grown so close to my heart in so little time. I feel so at home here it's crazy.
I never thought I'd love his family as much as him.
Suddenly, Wlad turns his face to the side, meeting my gaze. He smiles at me, love enters his sparkling grey eyes. "Adaline, my father's been trying to get your attention for the last five minutes." He says to me but I'm too focused on how his lips form the words rather than the words themselves. I wonder how many times I can kiss them before we part tomorrow in Swansea. I wonder how much closeness is enough for me to try to live without him in the next years. "Della,"
I shake my head, "What?" I ask confused.
Wlad's eyes move to Sergei and I turn my head around. "Right. Sorry. What was the question?" I ask in fluent Russian. Talking in Russian is as easy as English.
Sergei smiles at me. The grey eyes, which he gave his son, sparkle as well. "It's nice to see you are equally as much in love with one another."
I feel my heart melting in my chest. Is it really that obvious? "Well," I lick my lips, "this here is the one place we can be completely open. I think we both enjoy just being together without any worries." I answer and feel Wlad squeezing my hand.
"Your parents don't know?"
I shake my head, "Not yet."
Sergei looks at his son, "They won't be as understanding as us."
"No, they won't." Wladimir agrees.
Sergei looks back at me. "Well, I'm glad you've enjoyed your time here." He says with a soft smile on his lips.
"I enjoyed every second of it."
I brush through his short brown hair as the sweat runs down my body. I should be exhausted after all the lovemaking, but I crave it only more. Dawn is slowly approaching. The soft lightning looks breathtaking on him. It's another cold morning in Siberia but it's my last for a while. I fondle his left cheek, my fingertips feel how his scratchy his beard is. He hasn't shaved once in the last three days. He looks darker, sexier even. "I like your beard." I whisper as we both recover from our last climax.
"I know you do." He says before kissing my fingertips as I run them over his lips.
I smile at his words, "You know me inside out." My left hand runs down his face, neck, chest and stomach before stoping at his erection. His body feels the same way as mine. Every time we climax, we're ready to go again. It's crazy. "How many times can we make love tonight before we fall into an exhausted sleep?"
He rubs his nose against mine, "We're about to find out." With that he rolls on top of me again. I widen my legs for his narrow hips. I feel his cock at my entrance that's still soaking wet. Slowly he pushes inside, "Wlad?" I ask, cupping his face.
"Yes?" He asks back.
I moan right into his face as he's balls deep inside of me. The connection we have feels so surreal. "Thank you."
His grey eyes soften at my words, "You don't have to thank me."
"I know. But I want to."
"You've never thanked me before."
"I hope that doesn't mean you didn't know how much gratitude I felt."
"No, it doesn't." He kisses me softly, "Because just like your father, you can make people feel what you feel without opening your mouth. It's a gift I feel so privileged to have received because I know not many are allowed to look behind your mask."
I lick my lips. "I'm grateful to have such an amazing man in my life."
He smiles at me, "Trust me, the honour is all mine."
His arms wrap around me, holding me tight. "It was so nice to meet you, Della."
The way he holds me remind me of his son. His arms are like ropes of steel, only his hold is not as tight as Wlad's. "I'm really grateful for the chance as well. I've had amazing three days here." I agree. I already said goodbye to Wlad's grandma. I even had a look at her medical cabinet and tossed out 2/3 of her tablets. She doesn't need to take all of these medications, the combination of those were probably making her so tired and weak. I wrote down the medication I would recommend. "Make sure you get the meds." I remind Sergei. "Natalya should be back to normal in a few days, a week max."
Suddenly, Sergei kisses my forehead. "You were sent from heaven."
I flush, but not before of the kiss but the words. "I was not sent from heaven. I was just here at the right time."
The grey eyed man smiles at me, "Lydia would have loved you."
My throats tightens at the mention of Wlad's dead mother. I never met her, but I feel like I owe her so much. "That's very nice of you to say." I gulp and smile at him.
"We have to get going." Wlad reminds me, nodding towards the helicopter that's waiting for us on the landing field. As it's a clear day we can fly to the airport rather than drive for three hours again. Th snow has only become heavier over the last days, turning this into a true winter wonderland. The triplets for sure would think that Santa lives here somewhere.
I know one day they will see this magical place.
I nod, not ready to let go of Sergei just yet. It's crazy how fast this man has made his way into my heart. He was even faster than his son! "Until we meet again, Sergei." I whisper, squeezing him one more time.
"I'll miss you." He says before letting go of me.
I watch him embracing his son that's a bit smaller than him. "Next time you bring her here she better have a ring on her finger." Sergei says in a low voice, but I can hear it never the less.
His words make me smile. They don't scare me at all. Not anymore.
Wlad turns around and wraps his left arm around my waist. Electricity runs through my body at the touch. Together we walk over to the helicopter before climbing inside. We fasten our seatbelts and put on our headphones before the pilot takes off. The flight won't take long. Just thirty minutes... in thirty minutes we'll be back on the jet. In a few hours we'll be in Swansea.
"We'll come back." Wlad says to me as I stare out of the helicopter. Sergei is getting smaller and smaller until eventually he's only little dot.
I turn my gaze on the man that's holding my hand. "You do know I could have flown us back to the airport, right?"
He chuckles at my response. "Yeah, but that means I couldn't have kissed you during this thirty minute flight." He takes off his headphones before doing the same with mine. A second later his soft lips meet mine.
I spent the whole seven hour fly back to Swansea sitting on his lap. On the flight to Siberia we were miles apart and now not even a sheet of paper could slide between us. We didn't even acknowledge the stewardess. She left us alone for most of the time.
But now we've landed an hour ago - and we still haven't left the jet. It's just too hard.
"I could drive you back." His head is still buried in the nape of my neck.
I shake my head, "No, if Shai sees you..." I don't finish my sentence.
He lifts his head, "I don't want you to go."
I lick my lips, "I don't want you to let me go."
"Why don't we-"
"No." I interrupt with shaking my head slightly. There is not another option. There is no second try for us. Not until I fulfil my promise.
Not until I've healed Parkinson's.
Thank you for all the great reviews on the last chapter!
So, I finally revealed what happened during the weekend that Della spent with Wlad while being in rehab. Was it as wonderful as you thought it would be?
This is my favourite chapter of their story so far. :)
Please review!
In gratitude,
Nicole