Chapter 13: Because You Live

Chapter Notes: It's ending *sniff* Thanks to all of you who stayed with me through this story...to those who favourited this story or put it on their story alert list :*

And a special thanks to the ones who took their time and reviewed the story again and again, always motivating me to go on...I am grateful for every single review made 333

I don't think I would have gotten this far without you 33

Soo...enough of the sentimentality for now :D

Here goes Chapter 13 (well 14 actually but yeah ;D):

"Merlin...Why are you glowing?"

Arthur asked the warlock, just staring at him with an incredulous expression while the glowing boy stared back with a no less confused look on his face.

Staring at each other and finding their confusion and disbelief mirrored in the facial expression of the other, both of them suddenly had to stifle a laugh.

Arthur was not sure whether Merlin was really there or whether it was merely a dream or illusion again, and he was sure that he wouldn't be able to bear it if he let himself believe he was back and be proven wrong. But just seeing Merlin's face and the dumbfounded expression on it was nearly too much for him to take.

Merlin on the other hand had no idea whatsoever about what had happened. He had told Arthur to stop trying to bring him back because he knew that the price of restoring a life was another. If he was truly back now, he should be mad, and worried. But when he looked at Arthur and saw the cluelessness of the prince it was all too easy to fall back into the old teasing pattern.

After another short moment of awkward silence it became too strong to hold back and the two of them broke out into laughter. The tension which had weighted heavily on them broke with the silence and left them gasping for air after several moments of uncontrolled laughter.

When the laughter cleared their gazes locked and the force of reality hit them. Arthur took a hesitant step forward, his eyes never leaving the glowing person in front of him. His emotions were jumbled, confusing. He wanted this to be true so badly, just to pull Merlin close and be sure that it was him and he wouldn't have to go on alone, but he was afraid of being hurt again, left again.

Merlin stepped forward as well, carefully assessing Arthur's every move. He could tell by the look on the blonde's face that something was wrong, the prince looked torn. He was confused, wanting to stop the glowing which emanated from him and he reached for his magic to do so. It worked and the glowing abated. He was pleased if a little taken aback by the result since the light of the moon and the stars was suddenly the only light.

His magic felt different from before. He could tell that it had changed during this adventure. He could not tell how exactly, but he was almost definitely sure that it was stronger now. But he would have to examine that later, as Arthur was now standing within an arm's length apart from him.

The glowing abated and Arthur closed in faster now, encouraged. Now that the golden glow was gone it seemed far more likely to him that Merlin had truly returned. But Merlin's eyes didn't stop glowing. In fact they seemed to glow even brighter now, if that was even possible.

"Merlin?" Arthur asked again his voice shaking this time.

The other just smiled at first and the prince felt his heart sink. Why didn't he say anything?

'Come Merlin...please...just say something...please...yell at me if you want to do whatever you feel like doing but don't just stand there.' the prince begged internally, staying perfectly still on the outside though.

Merlin took a deep breath and cleared his throat. He wanted to break through the wall that suddenly seemed to stand between them but he didn't know how. But he was aware that he had to say something anyways.

"Sire." he said faintly "I'm guessing you don't know how I got here either now do you?"

Arthur just shot him an unbelieving look.

"Yeah..." Merlin suddenly grinned "Figures. I should have known that now should I? After all there is no way I could expect a clotpole like you to understand"

"Why you...?" Arthur responded and then he was all over him pulling him into a tight hug, which was eagerly returned by the warlock, who soon struggled to pull free.

"Arthur..." he laughed "let go...can't...breathe..."

"Ohhh nooo...You're not going anywhere..." Arthur grinned holding him even tighter o whisper into his ear "I missed you...idiot." before he gently released his hold.

Merlin just shot him an affectionate look at that, pulling him down to sit in the grass next to him, not letting go of Arthur's hand.

"So...what happened after I...you know?" Merlin asked when they were seated in the cool, dry grass facing each other.

Arthur swallowed hard, dropping his gaze from the still glowing eyes of the warlock.

"Well..." he started hesitantly, carefully stroking Merlin's hand, assuring himself of his presence "it was all a mess. Gaius came up with a plan to bring you back and we got on it right away."

"Arthur!" Merlin scolded lightly "I told you not to. It was too dangerous."

"Yeah I know you did. And that didn't make it any easier for me you know?" Arthur replied, looking up. "Knowing that there was a chance to bring you back, even if it was small, but not being able to fully go for it because of having to look out for your friends? Do you have any idea what I went through? Thinking that I might have to make a choice between your life and keeping myself and the others safe because you made me promise to? You have no idea what..." his voice broke as a small sob escaped his lips.

Merlin looked at the blonde, seeing the pain in those beloved emerald eyes and he felt guilt washing over him. If their situations had been reversed, he wasn't sure whether he would have been able to take it...to carry on without Arthur, just to keep a promise. He had cut Arthur off from his friends, their friends, by asking him to look out for everyone.

By doing that he hadn't made it easier for the prince, quite the opposite. Situations reversed Merlin knew that he could count on Gwaine to show him the way and keep him going, but Arthur was a person to rely on his own strength and judgement, he was no person to express his feelings openly. And by telling him to stop the rescuing attempts he had secluded his prince from the other's efforts.

"Arthur...I am...so sorry..." he said at a loss for anything better to say. "I never meant to hurt you...or to...I'm sorry..."

Arthur flashed him a weak smile.

"Just make sure it never happens again ok? I'm sure Gwaine will kill me if anything even remotely similar happens again."

Merlin shot him an answering smile at that.

"Yeah...Gwaine...He likes you, you know? He's just not really good at showing it."

"Maybe," Arthur replied dryly "But I don't believe for a second that he would choose me over you." Suddenly serious he locked his gaze with Merlin's golden eyes "You have a good friend there Merlin...He's loyal to you till the end. I don't like this..." he admitted "But I am glad you have him. Because if anything were to happen to me, I know that he'd make sure you'd be alright."

Merlin opened his mouth to protest, but as he remembered thinking something similar just a moment ago he shut it again. That did not escape Arthur's attention and the prince turned his face towards the stars, closing his eyes. He knew that the feeling of jealousy was ridiculously, but he couldn't help it. There was just something about the Merlin/Gwaine dynamic that bothered him immensely.

Merlin sensed the distress of his partner and he sought for a way to ease it.

"Arthur,...You can count on Gwaine as well...and on Lancelot, Gwen, Morgana, Gaius...if anything were to happen to me...again..." he added almost as an afterthought "They will all be there for you, you just have to believe that you can rely on them."

Arthur shuddered at that, returning his gaze to Merlin's face.

"I know...I do really, that's not the point..." he replied "just please, don't leave me again...please...?" he begged.

"Arthur...I would never intentionally hurt you...I would never consciously want to leave you...I couldn't...you are a part of me...and I love you more than my life...Never doubt that."

Upon the serious tone of Merlin's voice Arthur could tell that it was the truth and he relaxed a little. He knew that he had been overreacting.

"Merlin...?" he asked suddenly after they had been staring at the stars for a while in silence, revelling in the presence of each other. The warlock turned around to face him.

"Yeah?"

"Are you using your magic right now?"

"No...why?" Merlin asked, nonplussed.

"Because...your eyes, you know...they're still glowing."

"They are...? Huh..." Merlin wondered. "I really can't explain that..."

Arthur grinned "Figures" he said in a mocking voice "but I can hardly take you back home with me when you're eyes look like they're burning, I don't think my father would approve."

Merlin huffed at that, laying back and facing the sky again.

"Can't we just stay here?" he asked quietly.

"You know we can't do that. I'm going to be king one day after all, I have a reputation to uphold, what will the people say if both of us are gone all of a sudden?" he said, remembering what Merlin had said before this whole thing had started.

"Yeah." Merlin replied, also remembering, closing his eyes.

Arthur looked over to him, lying in the grass, looking so utterly peaceful in the pale white light of the moon and the stars. He sent a silent thank you to the forces that had given him and Merlin another chance.

Arthur carefully moved on top of the raven haired boy, making sure that he didn't hurt him. He gently lowered himself and placed a kiss on Merlin's forehead, slowly moving downwards towards his lips. Merlin's breath quickened and his mouth opened eagerly as their lips met.

Arthur shifted their positions, shoving the considerably lighter warlock on top of him, without ever breaking the kiss.

As they broke free from each other, they were both gasping for air.

"I love you...so...damn much..." Merlin choked out, his hands gently caressing the face of the prince.

At that Arthur pulled him down again, placing a swift kiss on his lips before he pulled Merlin against his chest, tucking Merlin's head under his chin.

"I love you too..." he responded, every word full of affection.

And while they were lying in the cold grass, just holding each other looking at the stars Merlin could feel the steady and strong beat of Arthur's heart and he felt completely happy.

He had a feeling as if this wasn't the last they had heard of the staff of compassion or his rescue, but at that moment right there, with Arthur on the moonlit clearing he couldn't care less. He was here with Arthur and that was all that matted, because no matter what would hit them, as long as they stood together they would defeat it. And as the realization of exactly how true this was hit him, the golden glow of his eyes slowly abated, finally turning back into his usual blazing blue.

Neither of them noticed that for a while, just holding each other and watching the stars in silence. But as Mystery and Valor slowly approached them, they got up to greet their horses.

Merlin hugged Mystery tightly, burying his face in his mane.

"Hey buddy, did you miss me?" he asked lowly. The horse just nudged him gently in response and Merlin smiled.

"Of course he missed you, idiot. We all did." Arthur answered in the horse's stead which caused Merlin to shoot him an affectionate look.

"Hey,..." Arthur called , surprised "Your eyes stopped glowing."

"I know." Merlin answered with a grin

"What does that mean you know?" Arthur pouted, demanding an explanation.

"I just knew, because I realized something. As long as we stand together I don't have to be afraid. SO my magic ceased to try and protect me. Because it knows that you will."

They looked at each other in silence for a while after that meaningful sentence before Arthur broke it.

"It's right you know? I will protect you. Just as you will protect me...And if we are both lost, we still have friends to rely on...that much I learned from this."

Merlin nodded with a smile.

"Yeah, our friends are amazing. We can be really glad to have them."

"Most of the time" Arthur muttered jokingly and Merlin threw a handful of grass at him. Arthur just laughed at that before he mounted his horse, watching as Merlin did the same.

"Let's go home, shall we?" he asked, and Merlin moved Mystery next to Valor as he answered

"Yeah...let's go home."

Chapter End Notes: I cut this chapter into two parts, I will upload them together, but as final chapter and Epilogue... mostly because I kinda like this as an ending scene but felt like there was something missing to make it complete...:D