14

Reckoning

Light from the rising sun trickled through the shades, flowing across the dark, coarse skin of his bare back. He lit a cigarette despite her gentle protests. He was muscular and strong, but had once been stronger. After years of service followed by years of retirement, his skin sagged where there were once great muscles. The jagged lines of his tattoos had faded with age. Something about the mornings made him old. It was the only time neither business nor the haze of alcohol could buffer the horrors lurking just behind his eyes.

He spoke without prompting: a broken record set to play by the act of being idle. "He should have never been a SOLDIER. The little shit was an amazing athlete. Amazing. I made him try out for the Abes. I'd always wanted to do it. I wasn't good enough for the pro circuit. Ever notice that? All men want to be their sons and all sons become their fathers. Even if they annoy the piss out of each other and their last words to you are, 'Dad, I hate you.'"

Scarlet sat upright, covering her nakedness. It was a strange thing to do after the night before, but as he sat so exposed to her, it felt wrong to be too exposed to him.

"I don't guess you would." The SOLDIER took a drag. "I shoulda stayed retired after the Wutai campaigns. They shoulda gotten rid of SOLDIER after that. The shit we did… What was worse was we fuckin' loved it. So, I mean, you can't blame me for not wishing that for my only son. He was all I had and I loved him even if he was a pansy-ass on his own.

"So he comes to me on his eighteenth birthday and tells me how he's gonna join up. Wants to go to strange, new places. Wants to meet new people." He took another drag. "I'll tell you, those Wutai dinks were some interesting folks. So I just laugh at him and think about those dinks. And I says to him… I says to him, 'You're gonna cry.'"

His eyes glazed across. His jaw clenched. His Adam's Apple pulsed. "Genesis Rhapsodus. Genesis fuckin' Rhapsodus. He shouldn'ta been in that training room. That freak shouldn't have existed. Sephiroth Crescent shoulda never existed. I shoulda stayed home to fish when the man I hate with every fuckin' bone in my body asks me to come back 'cause their shiny new SOLDIERs are all toast. But there's only so many fish you can catch. And there's only so much a guy like me who's only good at killing dinks can do."

Scarlet spoke. "Jecht…?"

"They shoulda never let that pansy-ass son of mine in SOLDIER. I wouldn't ripped off that drama freak's balls…"

"Jecht."

He turned with saucer-wide eyes.

"Why are you telling me all of this?" she asked.

"I haven't had a drink in eight hours." It both was and was not a real answer. She knew from experience without work or whiskey, he was unable to think of anything else.

She gathered her undergarments. "I need to get to Shinra Tower," she said.

He put out his cigarette butt. "Yeah. Yeah."

They dressed, neither looking at the other. Neither speaking. She was not touchy-feely in the morning. He liked that about her. She made her hair as best she could and he waited for her in the armor of a SOLDIER First Class.

She finally looked at him again. "You have to trust me, Jecht. I promise you I'll make it so nothing like that happens to someone else's son ever again."

He cracked a hollow smile. She never offered him anything. He had no wants. He had no desires beyond those of the body.

He lived the remainder of his days as one who was already dead and buried.

"Whatever you say, Sweetheart."

It was a long, eerie night. The bombshell came as AVALANCHE prepared to leave the breakfast table the morning after their arrival in Nibelheim. Aerith just finished her last bite of sausage: a peculiar-tasting, possibly homemade concoction Vincent fried up. She thought it best not to ask from what it was made. She, Tifa, and Cait Sith had talked into the night. Yuffie, who slept somewhere private and secret, would be the last to hear.

Tifa had seen Yuffie mad before, but seldom this mad. "What the hell do you mean we're not going to Wutai?"

"Calm down, Yuffie," Tifa said.

Aerith followed Yuffie into the mansions foyer. "I have to find out what happened in Icicle Inn. This could mean life or death for the planet."

"Okay, that's all well and good, but you're not a wanted terrorist," Yuffie said.

"Shinra is still looking for her," Tifa said. She did not elaborate: did not want to suggest Aerith would not be fine on her own. The thought had occurred to her.

Vincent approached, his organic hand still wet from breakfast dishwashing. "I'm going with her. It's dangerous."

"Me too," Tifa said. "We started down this path and I need to see it to the end."

Yuffie glared. "Cloud?"

Cloud avoided eye contact. He did not even have to answer Yuffie's question. Tifa was going.

"Cait?" Yuffie said.

The mechanical cat avoided looking straight at her as it fidgeted with its shoes. "I already booked them travel and want to make sure they stay safe at least until then. The only boats to that part of the Northern Continent that run this time of year are from Costa Del Sol. Tifa's right. This could get dangerous."

"Aerith's our friend, Yuffie," Tifa said.

Yuffie let out a dark chuckle. "Of course. We're doing it. We're all doing it. Aerith said so."

"Yuffie…" Tifa advanced a pace, but was stopped by Yuffie's sobs.

"I gave up everything to be in AVALANCHE, don't you get it?" Yuffie choked. "I had a home. It was a crappy, ruined one, but I gave it up so I could come to Midgar… the home of my sworn enemies… and try to do to them some of the shit they did to me. To my people."

Aerith approached. Tifa stopped her.

Yuffie stamped her fit, pouting. "Jessie. Wedge. Biggs. Marlene and Barret. Doesn't what happened to them mean anything to you all? They were your friends."

Aerith's heart pounded with growing ferocity. "Yuffie, my own mother was taken by Shinra. Don't you think I would go back to Midgar if I thought it would make a bit of difference? As long as Shinra doesn't know where I am, they can't use her to hurt me."

Yuffie stormed across the foyar towards the stairs and brushed past Aerith. "Whatever…"

Aerith started after her, but then Cloud's voice startled her.

"Let her go," he said.

Aerith froze and then turned to him.

"She has to fight her own demons. You can't do it for her." Cloud turned and walked towards the stairs himself.

Aerith still stood, stunned. Not only had Cloud spoken, but his words had been surprisingly deep. It was almost too much to take in.

Tifa sighed. "He has his moments. If only he had them more often."

Rufus' administrative assistant paged his desk. "Scarlet is on line one and wishes to discuss the vacant Public Safety head position."

Rufus waved his hand as though his administrative assistant were with him in his office. "Tell her I'm in an important meeting."

There was a pause. "Sir…"

"I have no interest in discussing the position with Scarlet, Ms. Trepe."

"Sir."

The approach to Rufus Shinra's desk was slow and when he was finally close, no one noticed him. Tseng, Reno, and Cissnei hovered with dark expressions, all staring at pictures piled atop Rufus' desk.

"It all comes back to… I just don't know how it could have happened. She was one of the best chopper pilots in all of Shinra."

Rufus did not speak. He snorted in a puff of air and closed his eyes.

"This isn't talent we can replace," Tseng said. "I'll take full responsibility. It's a serious loss. He was my senior to the Turks, you know. That Legendary Turk was. Veld had always hoped he would develop a passion for leadership and take over. The responsibility never appealed to him and he couldn't ever take anything seriously. Still, he was a far better soldier than I ever could be."

"We always used to talk during her cigarette break," Cissnei said. "She wanted so much out of life. She never used a gun, but she was one of the best shots we had. It's kind of funny. She… oh… What was her name again? You know. The Female Martial Artist?"

"Christ, Tseng," Reno said. "Who the fuck were these people anyway?"

Rufus put down the last of the pictures. "On the scale of failures, you haven't failed me much to this point, Tseng. Much."

It was half-way relieving and half-way threatening.

"Rude is on his way to the Temple of the Ancients," Tseng said. "We're going to see what we can find out. No one's seen Sephiroth since the attack on Cosmo Canyon."

Rufus nodded. "Keep me posted."

"What about AVALANCHE?"

Reno, Tseng, Cissnei, and Rufus turned to Reeve, waiting silently, his face tight and flushed.

Rufus met Reeve's glare. "What about them?"

"They're free now," Reeve said.

Rufus shrugged. "Public Safety's been notified to be on the lookout. Aerith Gainsborough is more than likely missing and with Sephiroth. I don't know what you want from me. The fate of the world is at stake. Do you really expect me to spend all of my resources tracking down a small band of logistically crippled terrorists?"

"They still pose a threat, Mr. President," Reeve said. "What's more, they just might know something about Sephiroth we don't."

Rufus visibly contemplated this.

"You're outta line, Reeve," Tseng said.

"I'm a Turk. Just like you all," Reeve was aware of the petulant note in his voice and unable to stop it.

"You should know your place by now," Reno said. He was being scolded for talking out of line by Reno.

Tseng's eyes narrowed. "Look Reeve…"

Reeve's lips tightened. "Cid."

Tseng shook his head. "What?"

Reeve laughed a high-pitched laugh. "Call me Cid. I know you all have been calling me Reeve, but don't you get it? For the past three years, I've been Cid to everyone but you. I studied astrophysics. I learned terrorist tactics. I helped bomb a damn mako reactor 'cause if I didn't it would have blown my cover. I let go of all my old friends in acquaintances, lost fifty pounds, and bleached my hair. Don't you get it? There is no fucking 'Reeve' anymore."

Reno listened with wide, startled eyes. "Look, slow down, buddy…"

Reeve went on. "Every minute of every day of my life for the past three years has been about bringing down AVALANCHE and now you're telling me to just drop it?"

Tseng raised his voice. "Listen, Reeve, I know you have a lot of personal feelings…"

And then Rufus hushed him. "Where do you think they are?"

"I don't know, but I can find them," Reeve said.

Rufus folded his hands and looked down in thought. "Contact the Tenth Platoon, Tseng. I believe Lieutenant Antilles has a score to settle with AVALANCHE as well. If he fails me again, I have little use for him."

Reeve stood erect.

"You'll deploy tomorrow morning, Reeve. You and a detachment from the Tenth Platoon. The Highwind will take you to the Cosmo Canyon site. From there, you'll go to work. I expect you to do better than Tseng's friends."

Tseng flinched.

Reeve's smile grew. "Sir… You're really…?"

"Don't misunderstand," Rufus said. "You said it yourself better than I ever could. You were a mid-level bureaucrat-turned double agent. What use do I have for you now? Fail me and I'll be very disappointed if I find you alive."

Reeve tried not to beam. The cruel words were a strange symphony to his ears. "You won't be sorry, sir."

"I expect I won't be," Rufus said.

Rufus' administrative assistant paged him once again. "Your ten-o'clock appointment is here, Mr. President."

"Send him in," Rufus said and then turned back to Tseng. "I trust you to make the necessary arrangements."

The double doors opened.

"And now," Rufus said, "If you'll pardon me, SOLDIER First Class Jecht and I need to discuss security protocols for Shinra Tower."

Tseng and Reno watched the old SOLDIER with caution; Reeve with bemusement, and Cissnei with vacancy.

The others left and Jecht sat across from Rufus—sat across from his enemy.

Yuffie packed her duffelbag in silent anger, apart from the others. The morning stretched into afternoon and the afternoon stretched further even as Cloud and Vincent, in an awkward moment of agreement, insisted they leave soon so they could travel for a while before it got too dark.

This time, Yuffie would not be traveling with them.

Vincent was really the only one with things to pack. He had apparently left this old life of his at the drop of a hat, so he had relatively little to do. Aerith had been busy, but taking her time, gathering provisions. Cait Sith waited with Tifa on the steps of Shinra Mansion.

Neither had anything to pack: one a machine and the other a shell of a woman with few worldly things: gloves, boots, a tank top, and an undersized miniskirt. Everything else had been left behind.

Tifa surveyed her hometown and the mechanical cat by her side that seemed always on the cusp of speaking, but would not. Though its emotes, or eerie lack thereof, she could almost sense real distress and concern in its faroff handler. Somehow, in that moment, it seemed more human than she.

Aerith approached Tifa with a bag packed with nonperishable food and changes of clothing. She came close enough to whisper. "Can't you say anything to her, Tifa? Anything?"

Yuffie brushed past them and glared at Aerith.

"She's stubborn and her mind's made up," Tifa said.

In the road, Cloud idled by the Shinra buggy. He glanced in Tifa's direction. His face was blank in the way it was always blank when his heart overflowed with feelings. When he was overwhelmed, he shut down. It was the thing Tifa hated the most about him.

He had been overwhelmed for the better part of two years.

Vincent stood and paced. His eyes locked with Aerith. Their interactions were always strange, but their nonverbal communication was increasingly difficult to interpret.

Yuffie slung her pack over the motorcycle: a cheap, old one; one that had belonged to the Leon family, Tifa recalled. It was remarkably unscathed. Yuffie had spent the better part of the day finding fuel and a replacement battery. "This is your last chance to come to Wutai where you'll be safe and your asses aren't gonna get killed," Yuffie cried. "About half a day southwest of here, there's a dock. I can get us all on. No questions asked." She nodded to Vincent. "Except maybe him."

"I wish I could, Yuffie," Aerith said. "Really I do. If only you could understand how…"

"Uh huh. Yeah." Yuffie strapped her duffelbag to the motorcycle and hopped on. She revved the engine. Without another word, she peeled off down the ruined road out of town.

Tifa frowned. After years, she and Yuffie had never bonded the way she and Aerith had within weeks. "Do you think we'll ever see her again?" Tifa asked.

Aerith tried to smile. "I was about to ask you."

Tifa nodded.

"You could have gone," Aerith said. "I believe her when she said you could be safe. She really believed it herself."

Tifa watched Cloud and Vincent fidget. "Maybe she's right and we're going to die soon. We'd probably deserve it."

"Tifa…"

"But that doesn't matter. I'm not running and hiding anymore." Tifa looked and saw her own resolve reflected in Aerith's eyes.

Vincent cleared his throat. "We should go. The monsters in this area are vicious and they're worse by night."

Tifa stoof and pulled Aerith up with her. Cait Sith hopped into Tifa's arms. Cloud crawled into the buggy and Vincent followed.

Tifa cast a final look over her shoulder as she entered the buggy, trying to match the ruined streets with those of her memory: ghostly apparitions that seemed more fantasy than real after only two years. She tried to remember the day he came back. She tried to remember Zack Fair and Sephiroth when he was only half-way a monster. She tried to remember Hojo: the monster next door.

The memories stung like lemon juice on a hundred papercuts as rain began to drizzle, drowning out the distant banshee wail of Yuffie's motorcycle.

"It's horrible, isn't it?" Cait Sith asked at last.

The buggy began to move. Tifa shut the hatch and tried to leave behind the spectral images of her past. Instead, she only remembered deeper…

A/N: At about 60,000 words now. Wow. Thanks for the reviews, those of you who have reviewed! The next update may not be on my usual schedule. I'm revisiting a prior fic for Halloween and that will be my priority in October. Trust me on this one. ^_^