Peanut Butter and Cherries

Mmm, what is that smell? I pried my eyes open slowly, looking towards the door, now slightly ajar. The smell of bacon and coffee filled my nose, teasing my empty stomach. I ran a hand through my hair and reached over for Helena. The bed was cold and empty but for me.

I got up slowly, taking the time to pull on an old pair of sweats, and a tank top. I padded downstairs, following the delicious smell into my kitchen where Helena, as I had guessed, was cooking. The enticing image of her messy black mane of hair flowing over her shoulders, an old t-shirt she had plundered from my dresser, the hemline barely covering her thighs was etched into my mind. I smiled, I wanted to see her like this every morning, muttering to herself as she kept an eye on a mess of bacon and eggs. The coffee maker was whirring at full speed. Altogether, it was a homey image, comfortable, and easy. I stepped up behind her, draping my arms around her hips, I pressed my lips to the back of her neck. "Mmm.." Helena leaned into my lips, "One of these days you are going to let me serve you in bed."

I chuckled, my voice a little hoarse from last night, "You'll just have to try again tomorrow." Helena hummed her pleasure, "Sounds like you have everything all planned out Dr. Bering." She teased, resting her hands on my arms.

"I do have everything planned out. This morning we'll eat breakfast." I kissed her shoulder, "Then we will watch a movie on the couch," I pressed my lips to her neck, "Maybe go on a walk, and talk some more," She tilted her neck, giving me room to move my lips higher, "And this afternoon, I am taking you somewhere special." I sucked just under her chin, eliciting a soft moan as she melted against me. "I'm going to burn the bacon." She muttered half heartedly, her arms limp as rags while her hips gyrated against mine. I pulled back with an evil grin to lean against the counter behind her, noting her cry of protest. "Then you should take care of breakfast." I watched her finish with a smirk, her smooth movement, the easy sway of her hips that I'm sure she hammed up just for me, the looks she shot me were somewhere between love and frustration at my antics.

We sat down to a leisurely breakfast, the food was really quite good, and I made sure to inform her. Kissing her thoroughly when she stood to take the dishes. I will admit that we would have had everything cleaned up far sooner if I had just gone and done something else. Something about waking up to Helena in my home brought out the silly child in me. It started with me flicking water and suds at her while we scrubbed our plates, and soon it degraded into a full out water fight that left us sopping wet, and giggling. Helena dragged me up the stairs so we could change, but I was laughing so hard I tripped, taking the graceful woman down with me into a pile of limbs. We made it up the stairs to my room after Helena commented that, "The stairs is really not the most comfortable place for this darling." I had laughed, and lifted her back to her feet before retreating to our room. 'Our room' , it has a nice ring. We each stripped the other out of the sopping vestments, and started last night's dance anew.

Laying together on the bed, breathing shallowly as our pulses returned to normal, Helena stared into my eyes, "Well darling, if you have plans for me today, might I suggest that my birthday suit is not the most appropriate thing to wear?"

I pouted, she was right of course, and she couldn't wear my clothes, they were at least two inches too long. Helena smirked, tugging my hair gently she said, "Tell you what, I'll call Amanda, she can take me back to my flat, and then when you have everything ready, you'll know right where to find me."

After a great deal of whining on my part, and some skillful convincing on Helena's, we came to the decision that she would go home, and I would pick her up at 2pm. We took our own sweet time about parting. I had tried to say 'goodbye', but Helena silenced me with her lips. "No darling, goodbyes are not for the likes of us." She murmured with a lively smile, and a playful glint in her eye. 'Ahem.' Amanda coughed loudly, tapping her foot. Helena gave a chuckle and followed the Marine out the door, blowing a kiss to me before she closed the wooden barrier between us. I gave a heavy sigh when Amanda's car sped off.

I took a few moments to gather my thoughts, then set about finding everything I needed. The basket that had been holding all my old mail, take-out menus, and some magnets that fell off the fridge. I found a blanket up in my closet, the thick denim was soft to the touch, and would be perfect for what I had planned. I smiled to myself as I dug through my favorite novels, looking for something that we could read together if the inclination struck us. I stashed my findings in the trunk, and sat down to the tome I had been neglecting since I met Helena. The reading was dull. I found myself staring off into space more than I read, and by the time I set the thing down, I doubt I could have told anyone what I was even reading about.

At quarter to two, I went to pick up Helena. I was slightly nervous about our destination, I wasn't sure if it would be too hokey, of if she had seen it before. I clenched my hands around the leather wrapping on the steering wheel, willing myself to calm down. This is Helena we're talking about, not some blind date or something.

I didn't have to wait long after I knocked before Helena's wide smile greeted me. She placed her arm on mine, letting me be the proper host now. I opened her door for her, offering my hand to support her as she stepped inside, and quickly made my way around to slide into my seat. I turned to look at her and she took my cheeks in hers, kissing me softly, "I missed you Dr. Bering." Helena's whisper made my insides flutter. "The feeling is mutual." I kissed her once more, then noticed the duffel bag at her feet, I quirked an eyebrow, offering her a silent question. "One can never be too prepared my darling Doctor." Helena informed me with an innocent smile. I laughed, pulling onto the freeway, "Is that why you don't have a car Helena? Because you're prepared?" I teased her gently. She looked chagrinned, "I've been considering acquiring one of those abominable tin cans," She smiled suddenly, "But then I would not need you to ferry me around." I smiled at her, "Very true."

When we reached the park, it was very quiet, the leaves were just turning, hues of orange and gold, mixed with the dark green of mature growth. The grass was thick and springy as we trekked further into the tree cover. Helena held the blanket, and the basket was in my arms to prevent any peeking that I was sure would have occurred. Helena followed quietly, letting me choose where we sat, her smile remained contained, though I saw the enjoyment hidden in her eyes. It seemed I had chosen something well suited to her. I found what I was looking for under an old maple, it was big enough I would have needed Helena's help to circle the trunk with my arms, and it's leafy branches provided more than enough shade for our purposes.

She shooed me aside, and expertly flapped the huge blanket out onto the grass. I chuckled and put down our basket with a sigh. "Everything alright darling?" Helena asked as she laid back, legs out, and her elbows back supporting her. I settled in beside her, arms crossed behind my head to look up at the branches, "Yes, I think I really am." The comfort of being so close to her, the relaxing breeze playing on my skin, it was heaven. We sat in silence for a short while, taking in the scene laid out before us. Happy children flying kites, bugs, birds, bees floating in their own little worlds. Parents sprawled out much as we were, with books or food, or even a simple hat to protect their eyes.

I could feel Helena's gaze on my cheeks, the gentle tingle, she wanted to know what we were doing here. I remained silent, waiting with a tiny smile for the surprise. The one thing I wasn't sure about.' Ahh, there it is'. The bands are starting up, we were the perfect distance away, too far to hear the crowds, but not so far as to drown out the Jazz floating over the wind. "Myka.. Is that?" Helena looked down at me unbelieving. I laughed, "It's a Jazz concert, they've been playing in the park for the last few days, I was hoping you didn't know." By the look on her face, she hadn't known.

"Anything else up your sleeve I should look out for?" She teases, raising her eyebrows. Glancing at the basket, I grinned at her, "I brought some of my favorite treats, I was hoping if I brought enough, we would find something you liked." I pulled out the huge spread I'd prepared, I really had no idea what she ate, or liked besides bacon and tea. Suddenly I had a thought, "You aren't allergic to Peanut Butter are you?" Idiot, Idiot, you are going to send your girlfriend into anaphylactic shock, and kill her, you are an idiot!

She quickly allayed my fears, "No darling, I'm not allergic. Why do you ask?" Sheepishly, I pulled out the cherries and peanut butter, it was my all time favorite thing to eat. When I'd first showed Sam though, he thought it was stupid, and silly, so I'd switched to twizzlers for him. I still snuck downstairs sometimes in the middle of the night to grab a snack. "My dear, from the expression on your face, you intend for me to eat those together, Yes?" Helena asked hesitantly, eyeing the peanut butter like it was going to bite her. I rolled my eyes, and started slicing the cherries in half, the juices running over my fingers and making them impossibly sticky. "It's not going to kill you." I offered her one half with a gob of peanut butter on top. She eyed me, asking silently if I required her to try it. I nodded, and she heaved a sigh before eating it.

The look on her face was priceless, she tried admirably to hide the disgust on her face, but this managed to break through her polite mask into a grimace. "Darling, did I make you with child, I know I am good, but not that good..." Of course she would blame this on weird cravings. "Don't like it then?" I teased, one eyebrow raised. I could survive living with someone else who felt that way, so long as she let me continue eating it without a fuss. She looked at me with an apologetic smile, one hand hovering in front of her face to cover her mouth, "It's positively horrid." I couldn't help it, she looked so appalled at hating something I had done, the shock from the taste still there, all of it just burst out of my lips in laughter of pure amusement. She chuckled softly, and took my cheek, her lips touched mine gently.

"What the hell are you two doing?" Nate's exclamation startled us both. He was standing next to the blanket, his eyes wide with shock and pain, "It's bad enough... You are with… HER... But you need to act the slut in front of the whole world?!"

I clenched my hands into fists, "What the hell did you just call her?" I exclaimed, jumping to my feet, more than ready to give this pompous ass what's coming to him. There was no way anyone would talk to Helena that way, not while I'm breathing. He completely ignored me, I was so close to hitting him, but Helena had risen too, she was standing between me and that.. Ugh, I can't even think of an appropriate name for him. "No Myka." She murmured, pressing gently against my waist to prove her point. Then she turned to Nate, resting a hand on his shoulder that he quickly shrugged off. "Nathan, please, don't make a scene." She waved a hand, "There are children here, if you wish to vent, please let us take this somewhere more private." I seethed to see her touching him, even just his shoulder. "Oh yeah, because you were being so subtle before." He replies scathingly, "Please don't mind me." He waves an arm at her, warding off her attempts to rein him in.

The pompous child stalked off as if he were the one wronged, and it was only Helena's grip on my waist that stopped me from giving him a bloody nose. "No Myka, please don't. I wouldn't want your reputation sullied over me." Helena murmured, her arms wrapped tight around me, and her body braced against the ground. I couldn't help it, all I saw was red. All I wanted was to beat something, and her in my ear, the only thing near. I took a deep breath, reining in the rage until it boiled beneath my skin.

"Fine." I muttered shortly, fists clenched in concentration. I couldn't let this slip, I would not let this go. How could someone like Helena even think of.. "How can you defend him?" The angry words popped out of my mouth before I even knew I was speaking. Helena sighed, "I'm not defending him love, his actions are reprehensible," I scoffed,"Reprehensible, but he is not worth the effort you would go to. Please Myka, just let him go, he is hurting." She pressed her lips to my shoulder, "Please love." I could feel myself melting. I knew I would kill him if he ever touched her, or called her a slut again, but if she needed me to let it go.. The focused nature of my rage faded, even if the endorphins, and the emotion lingered. I was still mad at him, but without any outlet, it became a test of my endurance.

We sat back down, munching on our lunch. It was a big collection of foods from sandwich makings, to fruit, and everything in between. The silence was deafening, I couldn't look at Helena without hearing Nate's words, 'Act the slut.' instead I ate more cherries. It was my comfort food, but I wasn't getting comforted by it anymore. I wasn't looking at Helena when she sighed, so I don't know why she started talking, what the trigger was. Maybe it was the little boy chasing down butterflies, perhaps me with my sticky fingers eating my favorite food, or hundreds of other things, but what I do know, is that Helena was talking specifically for me. "My daughter, Christina, she would have loved this." Helena gestured around us, "The music, the food, the sun. Even the blanket is to her taste, she always had a penchant for scrap quilts." She took a moment to breathe, slowly, deeply, preparing herself for the pain of the words to come. "Before she died... We would come to a park much like this, more of a public lawn, landscaped for our benefit, with trees, rocks, things to climb and jump over. We would go on daring chases through villainous territory, with barbarian hordes chasing us. But there was nothing she loved more, than to simply sit in the sun and read, butterflies draping themselves on our books, or legs when we sat still enough. It was a small piece of heaven." Another deep breath, "Thank you Myka for bringing back that little piece of heaven for me, it has been far too long since I tasted the sky."

I closed my eyes, willing myself to let go of this, just for a moment. I looked up at Helena softly, caressed her cheek with my thumb. This was about her, I could wait until tomorrow, next week, whenever. I couldn't think of what to say about her time with Christina, I didn't know her, and I wouldn't allude to it. So many people had caused me pain by trying to pretend they knew Sam in the same way I did.

"Sam and I used to come here a lot." I sighed, by a lot I meant all the time. "This was his favorite place to eat lunch, we'd come here and just sit." I said as I stared at the grass "Then why did you bring us Myka? I don't want you hurting just to please me." Helena's voice was equally quiet, she looked unsure as to why I would tell her something like that. In some ways, I was confused too. I didn't usually like to talk about him, but here with Helena, I felt safe talking. I knew she understood, she knew why I needed to talk, to feel him around sometimes. Everyone else wanted him gone, I still missed him. Wanted to talk about him. I ran a finger along Helena's arm, trying to gather myself, "I brought you here, because this is a place I was always happy, and since Sam died, I had trouble doing that. With you here, I know I can be. He's been gone for long enough, everyone expects me to move on. Well, not Pete, or Claudia or anything, they always understood that time would make it better, but I would never heal fully."

"Don't say that Myka." Helena pulled me into her arms, "You and I will find a way." I smiled, snuggling into her arms. I hoped she was right. We stayed that way a while, snuggling with each other, reading, snacking, settling back into our afternoon. Helena was reading a book aloud to me. It was a paperback that I had found sitting in the back corner of my favorite bookstore. "Prisoner of Zenda"*, I was surprised to see the tears in Helena's eyes as the last words faded away. "Helena?" I caressed her cheek, the tale had been sweet and self-sacrificing, but I hadn't thought it quite worthy of tears.

"So faithful. 'Shall I see her again-the pale face and the glorious hair?...But if it be never- if I can never hold sweet converse again with her, or look upon her face, or know from her her love; why, then, this side the grave, I will live as becomes the man whom she loves; and, for the other side, I must pray a dreamless sleep. ' How could words add to what he said? Living for her, even though her body belonged to another. I pray I never become royalty for that reason."

I smiled, nuzzling her cheek, "If it makes you feel better, I doubt you will have to pose as a king and fall in love with his bride to be while he rots in prison." It was sweet to see her so touched.

"Anthony Hope? I'm surprised. Not many people have heard of him, he's new on the scene." A gruff male voice replied. I looked up to see a short, pot bellied old man with grizzly hair. It wasn't until he said, "Arthur Neilson." That I jumped to my feet, offering him my hand, "It's a pleasure to meet you sir, and honor really. A scholar of your calibre. "A scholar of which calibre in particular?" Helena asked quietly, looking at me in puzzlement. She didn't recognize him? "Helena, this is the chairman of the school board. He's my... Grand boss."

"Just no old jokes." He warns. I knew he dealt with a lot of them from the students, but I would hope the faculty had more class than that. "So why are you here Mr. Neilson?" I blushed at Helena's forward question. "Enjoying the music, and offering Dr. Bering an opportunity. The things you've been researching don't exist, not to the scientific community." With that little tidbit, he left. I was shocked. How could he know? I mean, he had to have something better to do than keep tabs on something so stupid as my research. "Darling?" Helena asked, touching my arm. "Are you quite all right?" I glanced at her and shook my head, "No.. Do you mind if we go home? I need to think about stuff, and I don't want to hurt your image of this place." I needed to know what he was talking about. If he had something I could use? Imagine the colleges I could teach at... Ivy League, overseas, people would be begging me to give lectures.

Helena agreed that we could leave, packing up took barely a few minutes, and we were headed back to my place. It wasn't until everything had been put away, and we were standing in the kitchen that I realized Helena had plans far more interesting than digging through my volumes, and the internet. She wanted to express her gratitude for taking her somewhere so personal. As her fingers slid up under the hem of my shirt, and her lips pressed to my pulse point, I decided that history could wait one more day.