I know, I know, I owe you a thousand apologies for making you wait well over five months for this. As I mentioned in my author's note of my other W.I.P, however, I have a valid reason - I am a Year 12 student and I was not expecting and not prepared for the workload that last semester gave me. I'm not going to make promises with how quickly I can update, however I have worked out that, hypothetically, I should be able to do an hour of writing every day along with study and other commitments, so I will try. I've missed writing like this more than I realised, and it's always been a coping mechanism for me, so I'd rather not stop it again.

Anyway, a thousand apologies and to anyone who has stuck with me through my ridiculous hiatuses: Thank you and have a virtual hug and a tonne of virtual cookies.

Review Replies

MorWolfMor: I think you deserve two tonnes of virtual cookies as you've stuck with both my W. and you still review every time. Thank you very much and I wish you lots of happiness.

Edgar H. Sutter: It's so exciting to think that my writing can affect people emotionally. I'm glad you like it.

Monstrous Mitsuko: Thank you so very, very much for your review! Constructive criticism is what I'm after (without it I might still be as awful a writer as I was four years ago), so I very much appreciate it and have taken your remarks in mind. Thank you!

Sunshine-Midnight123: I'm glad you liked it!

boona: Apologies for not updating as soon as I'm sure you would have liked. Thanks for reviewing.

Linzerj: Oh, yes, about time Robin and Starfire got together. Glad you're enjoying it.

Eragon Namikaze: I'm so glad you like it! Now, Raven's reaction... Well. You'll see.

FrivolousFlare: Oh, I'm so sorry this has taken me so long! I hope you're still hanging around and reading. I miss talking to you.

TwilightPrncss: I'm so glad you liked it.

Audresacoolkid: I imagine feeling like Starfire is a good thing. Sorry it took so long!

b: One of your theories on Raven's reaction was pretty damn close, let me tell you. Hope you like it.

Xealvi: Glad you like it!

The 5th Dragon Guardian: Thank you!

Harmonious Wolf: Thank you so much for your review! I'm so very glad you like it and you think I'm keeping them in character. Thank you!

Seriously, if any of you guys have actually stuck with me through my ridiculous hiatuses, thank you so much.

And now I have the chapter that I have had planned since the beginning. I won't give any spoilers away buuuuut...

Disclaimer: I have not gained ownership of Teen Titans during my hiatus.

Chapter 14

Hurt

One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Beast Boy was hardly aware that he was counting the seconds in his head, but he was, hearing the tick, tick, tick in the back of his mind as his stomach twisted into all sorts of knots. Six. Seven. Eight. Raven hadn't responded, and he was beginning to feel sick. The soft smile that had been on her face had faded – not to an expression of sadness or anger or any such negative emotion, but to an expression that Beast Boy was finding hard to read. It wasn't her usual, emotionless expression, but he didn't know what it was. It was like a mixture of shock and disbelief and there was something else, and he wasn't quite sure what that meant. Nine. Ten. Eleven.

"Raven?" He broke the silence hesitantly, the smile having faded from his own face. Why wasn't she answering him? What did that mean? Had he completely misjudged the situation? Yes, of course his feelings were sincere and of course he had meant it – he was in love with her and he had absolutely no doubts about that – but had he been terribly, terribly wrong to believe that they were at a point where he could tell her that? Twelve. Thirteen. Fourteen. His hand, which had been resting against her cheek after he had tucked the stray lock of hair behind her ear, slowly slid down away from her skin until it hung limply by his side. Fifteen. Sixteen.

"Beast Boy." Her voice was soft, far softer than usual, and it wasn't her normal, nonchalant monotone. There was emotion behind it, Beast Boy was sure but, like with her expression, he couldn't for the life of him work out what it was. His heart felt as though it had leapt into his throat, blocking his airways and making it hard to breathe, and he felt as though he were going to be physically sick. He had screwed up, hadn't he? Oh boy, he had royally screwed up. He felt her hand slide out of his – not jerk suddenly out of his grip, but merely slip away until the touch no longer existed – and she took a couple of steps backwards, eyes remaining locked on his. He almost followed, almost reached out to her, but stopped himself in his tracks, staring at her. Her eyes were glistening, and that was such an unnatural thing to see in Raven, because it almost, almost looked like tears. She seemed to open her mouth as if to speak, and then she swallowed thickly, pursed her lips shut, pushed off the ground and flew away.

Beast Boy watched her until she was nothing more than a distant speck, and then he was alone.

TT

The day that had previously been considered one of the best in his life was rapidly turning into one of the, if not the worst. He stood there by himself on the beach until after the sun had set below the horizon and the world had become engulfed by the darkness of night. No more than an hour earlier, he had been thinking of how the beach was one of the most beautiful places he had ever seen, beauty only outshone by the beauty of his girlfriend (could he still call her that?), but now he could only see the place as desolate and empty and cold. After five or ten minutes he found himself sitting, feeling as though his legs were suddenly too weak to hold him up. He stared up at the sky, hoping and praying to see her return – even if she didn't love him like he did, she had felt something for him (Right? he found himself thinking), and he wouldn't lose her over this, would he? Even if she wouldn't come back to say the words he would long to hear from her, could she at least come back so that they could talk about this, whatever this was? But the night stretched on, growing darker and colder, and it was nearly an hour later when the changeling was forced to accept that Raven wasn't coming back.

He felt like a zombie, walking back up to the tower that night. His legs were moving of their own accord, but his mind was far away, and his heart was left in the sand where Raven had left him. He wondered if she were back at the tower already, having returned there before he did. He wasn't sure if she would want to see him or if she would have merely locked herself up in her room and disappeared into the world of her dreams or her books, but he found himself hoping that she was back there anyway. At least, if that were the case, he knew where she was, and there was some comfort to be found in that.

He found out that this was not the case the moment he stepped through the doors.

"Beast Boy," Robin greeted from the common room where he was sitting on the couch, Starfire resting her head on his lap, asleep. "I was wondering when you'd be getting back. There's some left over pizza in the- Hey, where's Raven?" Properly looking over at him and catching sight of Beast Boy's expression he asked, "Hey, are you okay?"

Beast Boy met his gaze for a fraction of a second, and then retreated to his room.

TT

"Beast Boy?"

It was Starfire who came knocking on the changeling's door, about an hour and a half after he had arrived home. Seeing the state of his teammate, Robin had woken his girlfriend up shortly after Beast Boy's return and had explained to her what he had seen. Initially, he had found himself worrying that something had happened to her, but Starfire was quick to assure him that it was not possibly the case. After all, if something physical had happened to Raven – if she and Beast Boy had been attacked and she had been injured, kidnapped or worse - Beast Boy would not have come home sulking but instead would have been out there rescuing her or calling the team for help. Robin had then realised that whatever had happened had to be emotion-related, and had come to the conclusion that they had had a falling out or had broken up. They had chosen to leave Beast Boy be for a while, to let him cool off or take his mind off it, but after an hour and a half of absolute silence from Beast Boy, both curiosity and concern for both of their friends got the better of them and they decided that they had to at least ask Beast Boy if he were okay. Robin had planned to go initially but then he had remembered what Beast Boy had been like after he had asked Raven out six months ago – he hadn't wanted to listen to a word the leader said. Perhaps Starfire would have more luck.

Not receiving a reply from Beast Boy, the alien girl leaned her head against the door, pressing her ear to it and knocking again. "Beast Boy, it is Starfire. May I come in?"

There was a long stretch of silence and Starfire was raising her hand to knock on the door again when it slid open suddenly, causing her to let out a yelp of surprise and stumble backwards to avoid falling through the open doorway. Beast Boy was standing there, looking smaller than usual – he wasn't holding himself with his usual confidence (or arrogance, as some might say), but instead his shoulders were sagged and there wasn't a trace of his quirky grin on his face. He met Starfire's eyes and, after a brief moment of silence, he sidestepped and allowed her to enter.

Starfire resisted the urge to grimace at the piles of dirty clothing that lay strewn around her friend's room, instead focussing on her teammate, another silence stretching between them as he moved to sit on his bed. Starfire opened her mouth to ask Beast Boy what had happened, but he got there first.

"I told Raven how I feel about her." He looked down at his hands, resting in his lap. He couldn't bring himself to look up at his friend. "And she... she just ran away."

Starfire hesitated, and then she moved over to sit gracefully on the edge of Beast Boy's bed, angling herself so that she was facing him. She tried to meet his eyes, even though he was trying to avoid her gaze. "What do you mean, how you feel about her?"

Beast Boy fidgeted, and then murmured, "I told her that I... love her." Even with avoiding her gaze, he saw the way the alien girl's eyes lit up, but he was quick to continue and her expression was quick to fade. "She just stared at me and then flew away. How was I so stupid?" He rested his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands, letting out a groan of frustration. Starfire reached out to him, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder.

"Raven does not like to show her emotions, Beast Boy," she said, her voice soft and gentle. "This love, it is a very big emotion. I think that, maybe, she is not quite used to it." She squeezed his shoulder slightly, and offered him a bright, reassuring smile. "Just give her a bit of time and everything will be okay. You'll see."

Beast Boy smiled back at her, but it didn't reach his eyes. He couldn't believe her words, at least not that night. He lay staring at the ceiling long after the other Titans had fallen asleep, playing the scene at the beach over and over in his mind. He always heard people talking about how love was beautiful and magical and everyone desired it, but for him, all it had done was hurt.

And now I'm going to go hide before you all kill me. I'm sorry for the spontaneous angst, but this has been the chapter I've had planned from the start. It's not over yet!