July 1997
Her heart was broken. If her heart was broken she had no idea how Jax was able to get through the day to day. Tara had been like an older sister to her. Her and Jax were so great together, how could she just leave him. Leave them. Tara had told her that she could still call her if she ever wanted to talk. Beth couldn't do that to her brother, if she stayed close to Tara he'd think her loyalty had shifted. Her family came first. Even if losing Tara made her broken.
She had lost a sister before, a brother, a surrogate father, and many uncles. Besides Tara might not be gone forever. She felt ridiculous whenever mom heard her crying and would come in to sit with her. She was 11 now, it wasn't okay to cry into your mother anymore. She remembered seeing Jax curled against his mother openly sobbing after they'd found out JT had passed. He would never have sobbed in front of anyone but her and Gemma. She had only been five at the time, but she crawled up onto the couch with them, she'd tried to soothe Jax by running her fingers through his hair, like he did to her, but in retrospect she had probably just pulled pulled his hair. She hugged them both for a long time that day. She was sure she had fallen asleep trying to make them feel better.
Now Jax had lost another person, he'd lost his old lady. Beth was certain that having someone's crow meant you couldn't leave and never come back. So while she was hurt, and Jax was crushed, she was certain Tara would come back. She had to, it was inked into her skin.
Authors note: A glimpse at what a crow means to Beth.