Disclaimer Not mine

Thanks as always :D... The name of this chapter came to me as I was watching various SGA episodes and deciding that Carson was a hopeless romantic (or at least a Sparky fan too). I also love Dr Lee from SG-1 so watch out for the Critical Mass hint and a mention of the goings on in The Long Goodbye. Read and Review as always.

Chapter Fourteen – Doctor Beckett's Guide to Resolving UST

John was sitting on Elizabeth's bed when she came out of the shower.

'Better?'

'Much. Thank you.' She glanced around the room nervously. John couldn't help but smile. 'Yeah yeah laugh it up fly boy.' She threw him a dirty look.

'Should we go and get Beckett so he can take a blood sample?'

'Funny John. Really funny.'

'In all seriousness though, you are alright?'

'I think so. I mean I have just experienced something that very few women ever have so that's something of a bonus. Mind you I'm not envying you boys at the moment.'

'I just realised something.'

'What?'

'We haven't had breakfast yet.' Elizabeth glanced at her watch.

'It's after lunch.'

'Well then we've missed out on two meals already, so I think we need to eat. Carson would be upset if we didn't eat.'

'I suppose he would.'

By the time Elizabeth and John had reached the mess hall, most of Atlantis had been and gone, so they had the hall almost to themselves. Only a couple of scientists spoke in hushed conversation in a darker corner.

They remained quiet as they picked up their trays and sat down to eat. Elizabeth hadn't realised how hungry she was and quickly polished off all that was on her plate.

'Hungry?'

'Must be. I guess your body needs more food than mine. I mean that makes perfect sense, but I just didn't think about it.' She paused as she collected her thoughts. She was rambling. She only rambled when she was nervous and seeing as most of the time she hid her nervousness she never rambled. She was completely messed up. Obviously trying to seduce her head military officer screwed with her brain.

'Why are you nervous?'

'I'm not nervous. Why would I be nervous? I'm talking to you, it's not as though I've only just met you and we are brokering a major treaty or something.'

'You're rambling.'

She opened her mouth to disagree but paused before changing her tact.

'I'm sorry John.'

'For what?' He was savouring the last of the turkey sandwiches that the Daedelus had brought with them.

'For what I just did before.'

'Trying to get me to wax my legs was very evil. But I forgive you.'

'I don't mean that John.'

'You mean what lead you to need a cold shower.' Elizabeth rolled her eyes and blushed slightly.

'Yes.' She hissed.

'Don't worry about it. It happens.' He smiled sweetly. 'But don't think I won't use it as blackmail if I need to.' Elizabeth stared at him.

'You wouldn't.' An innocent grin. She was about to tell him off when Carson and McKay, both of whom had entered the commissary without Elizabeth's and John's knowledge walked up to them.

'John wouldn't what?' Rodney was curious. Elizabeth looked furious.

'John wouldn't wax my legs for me.'

'What?' Both the doctors looked at the couple.

'I asked him to wax my legs, I haven't done them since I went away and John said that he wouldn't.'

'Right. Anyway I'm pleased to see you both here. Eating is especially good to see.' Carson beamed at them; they were actually following his orders for once. 'And I have the results of that blood test Elizabeth. It looks like you were right.' He looked at both of them. Elizabeth especially seemed out of sorts. 'Are you alright love?' Elizabeth glanced up at Carson.

'Yes I'm fine. I guess I'm just tired.'

'Understandable. You two have just been given a hell of a lot of information to digest. I just hope you are finding ways to keep your body chemistry normal.' Carson didn't know whether it was what he had said, but what ever had happened had caused John to choke on his drink and the Colonel had a coughing fit lasting several minutes. Elizabeth on the other hand became very interested in her hands. 'Are you sure you are both alright?'

John nodded, wheezing slightly. Carson let his mind wander for a brief moment. Why had they acted like that? Surely they hadn't? They wouldn't, would they? Maybe they had finally done something to resolve all that sexual tension that had built up over the last couple of years. Carson glanced at Rodney. The man was deeply involved with eating and had barely registered John's fit, let alone what had brought it on. Carson smiled at his two patients.

'Well I'm glad to see you are trying to stay healthy while you are like this.' He returned to the meal in front of him with apparent gusto, but kept an eye on both John and Elizabeth as he ate. There was an unspoken conversation between them, before they both got up.

'If you'll excuse us Carson, Rodney.'

'Of course. Take care you two. If you need too, feel free to return to the infirmary.'

'Thanks, but I think I want to sleep in my own bed tonight.'

'Of course.'

As Liz followed John out of the commissary (unknowingly being watched by Carson who was still sure that something very non-professional was happening between them) she realised what the problem with downtime was. She now had left the commissary and there was still at least four hours of day light left. She was so very bored. She was so deep in thought that she almost ran into John who had stopped to talk to her.

'Want to go and watch a movie?'

She nodded. 'Anything to pass time.'

'I agree, this all gets very monotonous doesn't it.'

'Yes. Very monotonous.'

It was nearly dark by the time Elizabeth and John left the video room. It had taken them nearly an hour to choose a movie. They had ended up watching the 'real-life' version of "101 Dalmatians". Both were confused as to why that movie had been brought to Atlantis in the first place, but figured, seeing as it was a kids movie there wouldn't be any sexual tension, no sex what so ever and nothing too sappy, or too gung-ho to alter either of their body chemistries for the worse.

'You know that movie wasn't that bad.' Elizabeth turned and stared at John in disbelief.

'It was a kid's movie.'

'So, all those dogs. I thought you liked dogs.'

'I do like dogs. But most of those were computer animated.'

Elizabeth glanced at John, catching him looking at her. They smiled at each other.

'Dinner?' Elizabeth asked.

'I'm not hungry.' Elizabeth tipped her head in agreement.

'Do you think Carson suspects something?' John pondered her question.

'I think he might think something, but it's not as though the man is subtle with what he thinks we should do. That man is a walking romance novel.' Elizabeth giggled. '"Doctor Beckett's guide to Resolving Unresolved Sexual Tension."'

'You've been thinking up that one for a while haven't you?'

'Just trying to find a place to introduce it.'

'I see. It should be a best seller then. Just send it to all those writers of TV soaps.'

'Any TV show even.'

'Yes true.'

'I wonder what his words of wisdom would include.'

'Well I think he'd probably say try and have a good bout of sex whenever possible, preferably in clichéd circumstances.'

'And when you are overtaken by aliens, try and make sure that they have been sexually deprived for a good hundred or so years.'

'Oh so is that all I was to you? A body just to feed your sexual appetite?' John pretended to look offended.

'For Phoebus yes probably, for me, don't count on it.'

'Oh really, pray tell Doctor Weir.' Elizabeth raised an eyebrow.

'That is for me to know and you to never find out.' John stared at Liz.

'I never pictured you as a tease Miss Elizabeth.'

'There are a lot of things you probably wouldn't picture me as Colonel Sheppard.' With that, Elizabeth turned down the hallway towards John's room leaving John, opened mouthed staring after her.