xiv.
"Damn it!" Bonnie jolts awake at the sound of Liv cursing and slamming shut her dresser drawer.
Sitting up, she rubs her swollen eyes. They're in their dorm room, Liv scavenging for clothes. When she finds a top she likes, she slings it into the gray duffel bag at her feet. She grins to herself when Bonnie stirs. "Morning!"
"How are you not hungover? You were blackout drunk last night."
"I don't do hungover."
"I never realized they were optional..." She scratches at her scalp and yawns. "Was I out all night? I don't remember coming back to campus."
"You've never slept better. Or quieter, at least."
Bonnie racks her brain. She knows the wedding was pleasant, no one died at the very least, but her magic is giving off serious alarm bells. Though, even with the Expression primed to attack at the slightest stimuli, she can't shake off this murkiness. Like she downed a bottle of nyquil. She didn't drink that much at the wedding, did she? "I must've I fell asleep in the car."
Another drawer slams shut. "Are you kidding me?" A sigh. "I hate and I mean really hate to do this... Bonnie?"
In her drowsiness, she manages to lift in her eyebrows in expectation.
"Okay. Once upon a time Jo planned to merge with Kai. Like, a few months back and I was her mentor. We all kind of camped out at the boarding house and I now realize I may have left some clothes there."
It takes a moment for the witch to muster some kind of response, but her expression settles amongst what Liv anticipated: confusion, anxiety, and dread. "It'll be quick," Liv rushes to say. "I go in, grab my stuff, and get out. I won't even start any fights. Well, no promises."
It's curious that Liv is so adamant about this. They are just clothes and the blonde hates the Salvatores almost more than anyone she knows. One would think her natural reaction would've been "eh, forget it." Then Bonnie remembers that it's just her and Liv in Mystic Falls for spring break. No classes or work to interrupt their time together. They may actually bond, and her stomach quivers at the notion. This could be a way to solidify their friendship. Like when girls go to the bathroom together. "Yeah, sure, that's fine."
She climbs out of her covers and crawls to the end of her bed. On the floor is her own gym bag which looks to be full. Without having to ask, Liv admits to packing it for her.
"It's eight in the morning. How much coffee have you had?"
"None. I just feel really good today, ya know?"
"Do you remember getting in a fight with Tyler last night?"
"Mm, no. I mean, I know I danced a lot and drank." A lot. "I dunno, I just feel re-energized." She shrugs, and the nonchalance sets Bonnie on edge.
"You hear from your dad yet?"
"Why would I?"
"He rode there with you, right? I mean, did he find a ride home? Do we need to go to the farm to get your car?"
The blonde crinkles her face and cocks her head. "What the hell are you talking about? I drove Dad back last night. Well, he drove me here and then I called him an Uber."
"No, you left with me and Kai. You were passed out in the backseat of his car - after you told Tyler he wasn't real, that he wasn't your Tyler."
"I think you're still dreaming, Bennett. I didn't talk to Tyler at all yesterday. And I definitely rode back to town with my dad."
"Damon saw you, Liv."
"Yeah, okay..."
Bonnie wants to argue but she bites her tongue. She's grown tired of her reality being tampered with, her sanity being questioned, but she's positive Liv is mistaken. Instead, she pushes through her lethargy and tries to recollect for yesterday's events. The bad dream. Kai being a surprisingly good listener. The tame wedding. The barely eventful reception. Liv getting belligerent with Tyler was par for the course in regards to ceremonial drama. How was that the night's only hiccup?
In the silence, Liv stops stuffing socks in her bag and glances at Bonnie. The other girl's apprehension is palpable, her green eyes squinted as she delves deeper into her thoughts. Something is wrong. She sighs and plops down beside Bonnie on her bed. "I remember the ceremony and babysitting my father and dancing with you and Rodney and Ric."
"I danced with you and Rodney," she counters, shoving a fallen spaghetti strap up her shoulder. "And Kai. Then Damon came over to us because you were hitting Tyler, and then Kai helped you to his car where you passed out."
"Really? See, I remember dancing and then my dad being really stuffy about wanting to leave, so we left." She furrows her brows. "Did anything weird-weird happen?"
"I want to say something did, it's like a gut feeling, but I can't grab at it."
"With Kai?"
"Everything with him is weird-weird. But, yeah. Something definitely happened with him. And maybe something...else? I don't know, but my magic is going haywire so who knows?" Something scared her last night and she can't shake it. Kai was at her side the entire time, his eyes on her face, hand at the small of her back. He was as perfect a gentleman as Kai Parker could be.
She looks across the room towards her desk. The red ceramic bird stares back. For a reason she can't place, she shudders. "Forget it. Let's just get out of here."
x
They pack their belongings into Liv's car, and Bonnie punches the address to her Grams' house as a destination into Liv's GPS. "Actually, can we make a quick detour first?" Liv cocks up her eyebrow but says nothing. They both know where Bonnie needs to go.
He opens the door within seconds of her knocking and he's still in lounge clothes. Thin, plaid pajama pants and a beige henley. She shuts the door and walks with him to the couch but refuses to sit. He offers her coffee or tea, which is a non-starter. "What did you do?"
"Good morning, Kai. Good morning, Bonnie. Beautiful weather we're having, isn't it? Gorgeous. Just gorgeous."
"What - did you do?"
"You're going to have to be more specific."
"You're getting sloppy. Liv and I remember two very different ends to our nights."
"Really?" He ticks his head to the side and blinks. "What do you remember?"
She purses her lips. He doesn't need the details. It doesn't help that she's foggy on the specifics either. "It doesn't matter. What does matter is you won't get away with this. You're going to make a mistake. A big one. It's inevitable."
"Is it?" He pushes himself off the couch and approaches her. Pinches the collar of her black v neck between his finger and thumb. His eyes don't go lower than her neckline, but he appreciated the view of her in denim short shorts when she barged in. "I don't think I properly told you how beautiful you looked last night. Red really is your color."
She slaps his hand away, but he catches her wrist. "I'm being sincere."
"I don't care." She wretches her arm from his grip.
"Then why are you here?"
"You took something from me."
"I actually took a few things. You really have to be more specific here, Bon."
"My memories, for starters. Something happened last night and I want to know what. So give 'em back."
He sucks air between his teeth. "I can't do that."
"Can't or won't?"
"Either?"
She pushes him squarely in the chest and he stumbles back, catching his balance on his bare heels. His face says he's tempted to do the same to her, but he bites it back. Breaking through the last curtain of drowsiness, she perks up, her bravado coming out to play. "Aren't you the big bad coven leader? What's the worst thing that could happen if little ol' Bonnie Bennett finds you out, huh?"
Unfazed, she steps towards him. "What are you so afraid of?"
"You." His nostrils flare, and that is not the answer Bonnie expected. He sucks his teeth. "It may be hard for you to believe and even harder for me to admit, but I am trying to save you."
"From who?"
"Yourself."
"So...my missing magic and my memories? That's all you?"
He scoffs. "Who else would it be?" But then his lips go into a hard lining imaging all the possibilities she might be thinking of that are not him, and he wonders how long that list might be.
"You could just be honest with me."
"We've been to that rodeo."
"If that's true, if I'm such a danger to myself, don't you think letting me in on it... I could help."
"I've given you chances."
"Then give me one more." It occurs to Bonnie that she doesn't have the upperhand here and maybe she never did. She may have Kai's affections, but he has information. He's definitely the type to take a mile if she gives him an inch, but she's at her wit's end.
She holds her arms out, palms facing the ceiling. "Fine. Here."
He furrows his brows, his eyes narrowing sharp on her. It's a trick, he thinks. It's always a trick.
"It's Expression," she shrugs. "But it's still magic. Take it."
"I can't - I left it with you for a reason."
"Then you should know the last time I had Expression, it killed me." She juts her wrists out emphatically. "If that's what you worried about. Danger to myself, right? Take all of it." It occurs to her this parallels them in that spit of a prison world. Only now instead of calling his bluff, she's damn near pleading.
He steps towards her, takes hold of her arms at the elbows, and sighs. His gray eyes gaze down, masked intensity baring down at her. "Bon-"
She interrupts him by meeting his lips with her own. There's no hesitation, no immediate shock to overcome. Like it's second nature Kai pushes her against the wall and grabs her, holds her to him with his hands at the nape of her neck. He tastes like coffee and peppermint and she instinctively cleaves to him, fingers gripping his sides, as if her legs might give out and the ground will swallow her up.
He's a controlled animal on her, not so ravenous that he can't savor this. A starved lion devouring a gazelle during famine. He'd suck the marrow out of her. She realizes she's the same, her mind telling her she's kissing him for a reason but her body wanting to ignore her motives. He's warm, his lips pillowy, and he's gentle like he doesn't want to hurt or scare her off but firm because he knows she's not fragile. If anything shocks her back to reality, it's how right this feels.
She tries to come up for air but Kai captures her again, brushes his lips along hers, presses kisses along her jaw, down her neck. His scruff burns a trail across her sensitive skin. There's a dangerous warmth pooling in her core and she thinks this is as good a time as any. Mentally conjuring the Latin, Bonnie wills her magic outward. If Kai won't take the Expression, she'll make him take it. The heat of magic fills her up to her toes, at least she blames it on the power, and she can feel it licking for a target, but when she pushes it towards Kai, it clusters together like aiming a blowtorch at a concrete wall.
"Yeah. You really know how to ruin a moment, Bonnie."
Kai lifts his head from her collarbones and licks his lips. Cold amusement is present when he looks at her. "When I said can't, I really meant can't."
"But you're a siphon."
He swiftly turns away from her, his fingers at his tingling lips. Of course kissing him had been a distraction. His instincts are never wrong, but it doesn't mean she didn't mean it, he tells himself. Just that he has to work harder to get one out of her that's genuine. He strides over to the window overlooking the main strip, Liv's car idling below. He spies his bored sister playing with the sunroof, watching it glide open only to immediately slide it shut. "Loose ends."
Shoulders bowed forward in defeat, Bonnie stuffs her hands in the pockets of her shorts. "What?"
He spins to face her and crosses his arms. "Loose. Ends." His voice is light, as if he's convincing himself no harm, no foul. "I stole your memories to try and tie up loose ends."
"What, from last night?"
"Sure, okay. You and my father in the bathroom. Tyler and Liv fighting."
She frowns. "What happened with me and your father in the bathroom?"
"You mean you don't remember?" he chuckles. "The cliffnotes, then. You, my father, and my tenacious and downright pain-in-my-ass little sister are getting a little antsy, and I'm afraid if you find the right thread, this whole thing is going to unravel."
"What thing? Jesus, Kai, what did you do?"
"I did what I had to do, okay!" His eyes widen, their pupils dilating even in the bright room. His bites his bottom lip in an effort to calm down and walks back to Bonnie. "You kind of forced my hand, so desperate measures for desperate times, right?"
He gives her a manic little smile and Bonnie wonders if he's really changed from the guy he was so many months ago when they met in 1994. Maybe this is just a sick game to him and he's still the person who could gut her and not think twice about the blood when it splatters on his shirt. He raises his palms to her face again but lets them just hover. Close enough she can feel their warmth and the threat of however he could hurt her, but far enough she knows he's not going to completely crack.
"Oh, Bonster..." His hands settle on her shoulder, like ice drenching her. He'd only called her that once. From a video on long forgotten camcorder before that disaster wedding everyone keeps telling her didn't happen. How "This is kind of all your fault" echoes in the back of her mind more times than she'd like to admit. Him using that name now... "I just couldn't let you die."
"What?"
"I have to hand it to you. You're really fucking perceptive, you know that? Can't say I expected any less from you, but would it kill you to let sleeping dogs lie?"
She slaps his hands away from her, but that only encourages him to step closer and hold her face tighter. Their wrestling is futile, though. Whatever game they're playing, Kai is in the lead by a huge margin. "What do you mean you couldn't let me die? What happened? What did you do?"
The Expression she unsuccessfully attempted to expel wells up within her, building in temperature and strength the more unhinged her emotions become. Sure, she could fight him, throw the entire spellbook at him, but he wouldn't give her what she wants. What she truly needs to know. The utter confusion and dread, it's ripping her apart to be so close to solving this mystery and Kai just won't budge.
"Please," she begs, her eyes glazing over with tears. She latches onto his wrists and holds tight, his body swaying against hers in a morose dance.
Kai purses his lips as he stares down at the distraught witch in his embrace. "I'm sorry, but it's just not the right time, Bon." There's no kindness in his tone. He's not sorry. This is a powerplay if she ever saw one.
She squeezes her eyes shut, tears leaking out, and tries to compose herself. Biting back the swirl of Expression is always the hard part. It doesn't hurt when she gives in, rides its wave, but it's painful when she fights it. She licks her lips and only once she's gotten a grip on herself does she meet Kai's gaze again. "Then when?"
"When it's time you'll be the first to know." He then boops her nose with his index finger. "Pinky promise."
She shrugs him off, not because she's grown tired of his touch. Quite the opposite. But it's hard to pull herself together when he's got such an intimate view of her vulnerability. Every encounter with him strips away the little bit of control she thought she had. She can't even properly gift archaic magic to a freakin' siphon.
Fists wiping at her wet cheeks, she sinks her teeth into her bottom lip and huffs. Spring Break. She has one week where presumably she'll be Kai-free. No one's made a move to invite him to Mystic Falls and he doesn't seem eager to join her and Liv anyway. She reminds herself a break from him, from Nancy Drew-ing will be good for her.
"So you're not going to give me anything?"
He grins, propping himself on the arm of his couch. "I did. You tried to pull one over on me. Again. Kissing me to distract from you trying to force your magic on me, which I told you wouldn't work. So now you get to spend the next week obsessing over the fact that - you kissed me. I mean, you really kissed me."
Her eyes shutter closed because yes, she did. She really did.
After what feels like eons, Bonnie climbs back into the passenger seat of the car. Her friend takes in her restless energy and swollen lips.
Liv barks a laugh. "Nope. I am not gonna ask. Not doing it."
Author's Note: I was told to update ASAP Ferg, but in my defense...I don't know who that is. I was also told I would be forcibly hugged for being trifling, and I really can't argue with that logic. But really, the Bonkamily on tumblr motivated me. I've been stuck trying to get from point A to B to C, but y'all really inspired me. The beautiful content from the BK Secret Santas and the love shown during BK Appreciation Week 2k17. Bonkai-Coven even made gifsets for/of "Horizon" scenes and that's never happened to me before! Plus, I've been on a bk bender, scoping out AO3, and I do not intend to stop now. So, yeah, I'm back in a big way.
Happy new year to you and yours, and I'll see you topside in 2018!