Chapter 14

AN Enjoy. :)

After Tony left I sat on my bed thinking about what has gone down over the last few days, after a while I realise that I probably owe Abby and Gibbs an apology, even though they took all of my coping mechanisms away, it's not like they knew that, and they were just trying to help me.

I slowly roll off the side of the bed and stand up, as I walk out of the room I can hear the low sound of voices from downstairs, I walk down the stairs and into the living room where they are all still seated, they all quiet down when I walk into the room

"Hey, um, can I talk to you for a minute Abby?" I ask, slightly nervous

"Sure" she says as she gets up and follows me into the kitchen

I take a moment to gather my thoughts and then I turn around and face her

"I'm sorry, for yelling at you earlier, it wasn't your fault I was angry and you didn't deserve that, so i'm sorry" I tell her

"Your forgiven, for yelling at me. What you aren't forgiven for, is telling us to find a more worthy cause, I haven't known you all that long Dean Winchester, but you are a good man, you saved the world, and the people in it, which is something that not a lot of people have on their resumes. Even if you hadn't, you raised your baby brother, and your smart, and your sweet, and you are so willing to sacrifice everything that you are, for someone else's happiness. You deserve more than your lot in life, and even though none of us can go back and change what happened, you deserve a better, brighter future, you deserve happiness" she tells me, her words strong and sure

"But why? Why do you want to help me? I'm a fuck up, sure I saved the world, but i'm the one who started the fucking apocalypse in the first place. I raised Sammy because I love him, and no one else was there to do it. I sacrifice everything, because it's worth it, because it's my fucking job, it's what I was raised to do, since I was a kid, take care of Sammy, and kill monsters. That is my life, it isn't anything special, if I wasn't here to do my job, someone else would be." I tell her

"No, it is special, because you sacrificed everything for your family, for the world, and you got nothing in return, you got your brother taken from you, you got a car for a home, you got a father who didn't give a shit about you, you got scars on top of scars, you got a shit hand in life, and you still came out the other side a good fucking person, the fact that you still function, is amazing to me, I can't imagine going through what you did, and coming out the other side a functioning, good person, and then decide to go back to saving people every day. Because after what you did, stopping the apocalypse, going to hell, you would have had every right to quit, every right to say fuck it and find normal somewhere." Abby tells me vehemently

"I can't quit, I save people, and I hunt things, and that is what I do, that is what gets me through to tomorrow, knowing that i'm still living, because there are still people for me to save" I tell her quietly, hoping that she just agrees to disagree.

She drops her head, apparently not willing to debate this with me right now and gives me a quick hug as she leaves the kitchen.

I poke my head out of the kitchen to ask Gibbs if I can talk with him, only to see everyone looking at me, guess they heard our conversation then.

I just avert my eyes from theirs

"Hey Gibbs, can I talk to you for a sec?" I ask him

He just nods and gets up, walking past me into the kitchen.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have yelled at you, and since I am living here for the moment, I won't drink in your house, your right, they are your rules for your house, and I should have realised that" I tell him, hoping he doesn't catch onto the fact that I said I wouldn't drink in his house, that doesn't mean I can't go to a bar and get drunk.

He just narrows his eyes at me, I take that to mean he did catch onto the double meaning of my words, but he just looks at me through his narrowed eyes for a moment longer

"Never say your sorry, it's a sign of weakness" he tells me simply

I just chuckle, happy knowing that at least I apologised. I just shoot him a genuine smile and walk past him back into the living room, making the decision to sit in the empty spot next to Tony on the couch, making him smile as we bumped shoulders on my way down.

Immediately after sitting down Cas pops out of nowhere looking as grumpy as ever

"Hello Dean" he says in his standard greeting

"Hey Cas, what's up?" I ask curiously

"There is a hunt in Alabama, I believe it is a wendigo, you told me to tell you if I happened across any monsters" he tells me

"Thanks Cas, i'll let Bobby know" I tell him

He pops away before I can ask him anything else

"Bye" I say to thin air, shaking my head in fond amusement

"Does he always do that? Just pop up and then leave?" Tony asks

"Yeah, he just pops up and then disappears, almost made me crash the car a few times, he doesn't seem to understand that a little warning would be nice" I tell him

"Hm, are all angels like that?" Ducky asks from his position on the couch across from us

"Hell no, most angels are absolute fucking dicks, one gave me stomach cancer while they were trying to convince me to say yes to Michael, total fucking dick" I tell them bitterly

"Wait? He gave you stomach cancer? How is that even, what, why?" Tony asks

"Because stomach cancer fucking hurts, thats why, improvised form of torture" I tell him

"I thought that angels were supposed to protect, to guide, not torture" Tim says

"You might have missed the part where I said that they wanted to start the apocalypse? They don't care much for human casualties, besides, they are warriors, not fluffy happy little angels who sit on clouds and play the harp, I had to learn that the hard way" I tell Tim

"Warriors?" I hear Gibbs ask

"Yeah, they are warriors for god, they fight in wars and they carry out god's word, and if his word is to kill, they kill, they were made to follow orders. It took Cas quite a while to warm up to the whole Team Free Will thing" I say

"Team Free Will?" Abby asks

"Oh, that was our team, we were fighting for Free Will, so we were Team Free Will, an angel, 2 hunters, an archangel and the king of hell." I say with a smile on my face, a fake smile, but a smile nonetheless.

AN ATTENTION

So I know that it has been awhile since I last updated and I apologise for that. But I have an important announcement and I thought it would be better received with a chapter so, I will not be posting for 3 weeks. I am going to a summer camp that does not allow electronics of any kind so I will not have any way to write or to update. I am sorry, it sucks because I am going to have to write with a paper and pen, or not at all, so that fucking sucks ass. so I will be back in 3 weeks, byeeee. Thoughts? Good? Bad? Meh? Lemme know what you think. :)