She shouldn't have said it. She should have never said anything to him. She should have enjoyed his hand laced with hers. She should have smiled back at her family, and sat beside them. She should have been his by now. But no. She had to be as stubborn as she was and push him away. Now, all she wanted to do was pull him back.
She pushed herself from her bed and trudged over to her bathroom. She almost screamed when she saw her reflection in her mirror hovering over her vanity. Her hair was a mess, her eyes were a mix between red, and black from eyeliner, and the frown on her face seemed permanent. She found it hard to believe that she was ever going to smile again. Honestly, what was wrong with her? Why did she let him go? Why didn't she follow?
She walked slowly through her bathroom and turned on the hot water in the shower. Only one more day of the Christmas break, then she would have to face him. Even more frightening, the New Years dance was coming up, and this was no James's party. The whole school would be there…
Christmas passed in a blur of cheers and thank you's for Josh's family, but for Josh, it passed with a wave of grief and sorrow. The girl he'd been in love with since ninth grade didn't want him. Didn't want anything to do with him. He missed the good days. Her young, cheerful face, her bright curious green eyes, her thinking only of him as a best friend, nothing more. Of course, everyday then, he had to resist the urge to shout it out to her that he liked her more than just a friend, but he was afraid that the very same thing that happened to him now would happen. So he didn't prevent it, he just postponed it.
It was Monday morning, January fifth, and he was the most unready person in the world to go to school. He climbed up into his glistening silver truck and drove with some reluctance to Oakland High. No amount of energy or happiness was with him that morning, just a full sense of dread. Then there was the New Years dance coming up, and it was no James's party. The whole school would be there. Should he ask Elizabeth? Should he ignore her like she did to him? The only problem with that was that he couldn't bear to stay away from her. Even the last few days were as painful as ever and him kissing her just before didn't help at all. The only reason he didn't fully push her from his heart was that he wasn't over her. He couldn't be if he tried.
Finally pulling up to the parking lot of the school, he parked for a while. He was wearing his blue letterman jacket and jeans like always, but today he wore a black long sleeve knit shirt. He actually thought he looked like he'd just popped out of a Halloween book.
He gloomily pried himself from his truck and took slow, uneasy steps towards the doors. There was a small breeze rushing through his hair and he pulled open the doors to the school. Looking to the side, he walked a little faster considering he was nearly five minutes late for homeroom.
The trip to his locker took forever, and it didn't really help that Elizabeth's locker was two down from his. The hinges creaked and the sound echoed through the empty halls as he opened his locker, gathering his books. He shoved them in his bag and began to walk the opposite way towards Mr. Walker's classroom.
He opened the door slowly, not really in a hurry to get a tardy slip, and walked inside quietly.
"Nice of you to join us, Mr. Evans," Mr. Walker stopped going on about math and addressed Josh. He nodded back to his teacher and took a seat behind Rachel, and was that ever a mistake. She turned around not a split second after he had sat down and began to whisper to him. Her rants went from asking him where he was, to why he was frowning, to how her hair looked today. You'd think she would give him a break, or maybe give up considering they broke up already, but no. She was as persistent as ever.
The bell rang, freeing him from listening to how headbands make her face look too skinny. He thought she looked terrible with or without them. Of course, she was pretty, with her long wavy blonde beach hair, and her clothes and make-up. Nothing on this earth, though, could make her as smart, beautiful, and real as Lizzy was.
He strode down the hall in a hurried manner, eager to be shot of her. Briskly walking towards his locker, he was looking down as he suddenly collided with a person. Books flew everywhere, and he heard and all too familiar shriek.
"Watch where you go-" The soft voice stopped short when green eyes connected with blue, "Josh…"
He didn't expect to see her so soon, but she looked completely different. She looked as though she had spent her entire holidays crying, and she was in a sweater and jeans. Still, she looked beautiful to him. Outside and in, she had been beautiful to him ever since ninth grade.
"Lizzy," he nodded to her, but all he wanted to do was hug her, for them to be ok again. He saw her glance sideways, and he bent down to pick up her books for her.
"Err, thanks," she blushed, and then looked sideways again. He followed her glance and for the first time noticed a small flyer that suddenly appeared on all of the lockers. Why hadn't he noticed them before?
He looked closer, and saw that they read: New Years Black and White Masquerade Ball Saturday, January 17th. Wear a mask and ONLY black or white gown or suit. From 7 o'clock to 12 o'clock.
So, she was staring at a flyer?
"Are you going?" he asked suddenly. If she was staring, she must be thinking about it.
She shook her head in and shrugged, wordless.
"No one's asked you yet…" he said, still looking at the flyer when she looked to him. He felt a sense of sorrow right then. He refrained from looking at her, and instead looked towards his feet.
"Are you going?" she said as soft as a mouse, still staring at him longingly.
"No," he said flat out knowing for a fact that she wanted to go with him. He, however, had different plans. He was going to ride with Mason to the party, and then having a mask would be a good thing. Only because she wouldn't know he was there, and he wouldn't know if she was there.
She nodded and dropped her head, walking slowly away from him and clutching her books. Josh thought he heard a small sob as she rounded the corner. Why the heck was she crying? She was the one who said she didn't like him. Who took his heart and stepped on it. Who made him look like an idiot for kissing her. He ran his hand over his face, glanced once more at the flyer, then walked off in the direction towards his locker.
When Elizabeth got home that day, she ran straight to her bedroom and threw her schoolbag down. She tore her notebook from one of her drawers and began to sketch.
After drawing through at least half of her notebook, and most of the paper crumpled and thrown across the room, missing the trash can, she finally tore another page out. This one, had a sketch of a dress and a mask, the very one she planned on making for the ball. She was going after all, and after hearing Josh say he wasn't, she figured this would be just one night free of drama. Free of everything.
She smiled down at her soon-to-be dress and brought out some fabric. It was going to be a long week…
Josh stood on his balcony, gripping the banister and his face up towards the moonlight. What if she did go after all? What would happen if she guesses it was him under the mask?
A soft knock came from his door and his mom entered the room carrying a plastic bag as big as the tuxedo inside of it; her other hand was behind her back. Black and white, of course. His mom smiled and held it out to him.
"It came by this morning, and I forgot to give it to you," she handed it to him, and put her free hand behind her back as well.
He eyed her suspiciously, smiling. He then shifted his eyes to the sleek black coat and pants. There was a brand new, crisp, white collar shirt, and black dress shoes. He smiled brighter and then laid it over his arm, ready to try it on. But first, he knew he was missing one thing.
"Hand it over," he laughed at his mother, gesturing to her arms, which were behind her back. She smiled and removed one hand from her back; it held a new shiny black mask.
When he came out of his bathroom from changing, he was pulling at his tie, looking down, and his coat cuffs were undone. His mother smiled and rolled her eyes, standing up from his bed and walking over to him. He frowned at her apologetically and she proceeded in tying his skinny tie for him as he buttoned up his cuffs. When she was done she brought the knot up to his neck and smoothed it out. He said a quick word of thanks and stood back for her to see.
"Perfect," she smiled to him and he returned her grin. He took the mask from his covers and slipped the elastic to the back of his head. He turned to the mirror, and laughed out loud. He looked like Zorro in a tuxedo. His mom smiled from behind and he turned to her.
"You're going to be breaking some hearts tomorrow," she fixed his hair right quick and patted his shoulder.
"Thanks mom," he said, but inwardly frowned. He already broke a heart. The very same heart that broke his.
Mrs. Evans shuffled out of the room and closed the door behind her softly. Josh looked back to the mirror and exhaled. He closed his eyes and raised his fingers to his temples, trying to soothe the building headache. Too much on his mind.
Elizabeth stood on her porch, her long brown hair in a messy bun and her chin resting on her palm while her elbow rested on the fence banister. She looked out to the bright silver moon, unaware of a figure sneaking up behind her.
"Boo!" a voice announced from behind her. Hands poked at her sides and she jumped about a foot from where she was standing.
"Dad!" she hissed at the tall lanky man in front of her. He wore a permanent grin and his matching emerald eyes sparkled with amusement. Clearly, his daughter had been spooked. Mission accomplished.
He snickered and held out to her a beautiful red dress. Her design, of course. Her hands flew to her cheeks and she smiled in amazement at him.
"You said they couldn't make it!" she still smiled at him, taking the dress gently in her hands. She examined it closely. It was perfect. Every stitch, every part of it was beautiful. It was knee-length, and the color was a brilliant red. It had a matching red bow to be tied around the waist. She decided to break the rules this time. She was going to wear a red dress to a black and white ball. Of course, though, her mask was a pearly white with small twirl designs in it. She hugged him quickly and ran to her closet to try it on. Her father smiled and leaned against her doorway. She came out five minutes later, high heels, mask, and all.
She laughed and did a small turn.
Her father grinned wider, "Stunning."
She hugged him tight. She couldn't wait until tomorrow night.
It was Saturday night, January seventeenth. A glimmering silver truck drove by Oakland school and into the parking lot. The truck pulled up to a parking space and a boy with a tuxedo on and black mask around his eyes stepped out from his seat on the driver's side. He closed his door and locked it, making the car signal it was locked with a small 'beep'. He walked swiftly with his coat tossed over his shoulder. He reached the gym doors in minutes, and pulled them open.
Music blared from the DJ's speakers. Teens danced and stood awkwardly, teachers stood at the corners keeping an eye on the troublemakers. It was a completely normal dance, but everyone was wearing either black or white or both, and had a mask on. The stairs leading up to the second floor were fully across the room from the boy, and they were the centre of the gym. A banner hung on the wall above the stairway, ribbons of pearl and ebony were strewn across the entire gym with matching balloons scattered around the floor, and colored neon lights danced along with the students.
The boy made his way across the dance floor to his friend who was standing with a tall blonde cheerleader, drinking punch. When he reached him, the blonde girl had left and his friend was downing the punch. He pushed his friend on the shoulder to get his attention, and his friend looked sideways to him.
"I thought you were coming over so we could ride together," Josh yelled to him over the blaring notes of Just Dance.
"Turns out, my mom let me use my car just for this!" Mason explained with a shrug. Josh rolled his eyes to his friend the leaned against the snack table, watching the other teens.
Just as the song changed, the murmuring began. People began to look towards the stairway and he heard confused and amazed voices and saw eyes widening. He shifted his gaze, and saw a small shy girl slowly descending the stairs. The girl's hair was pin-straight and dark brown in the neon lights, she wore a beautiful flowing knee-length fire red dress, her mask was white with gold trimming, and her stilettos were the same color of her dress. Josh's jaw almost hit the floor. The girl was gorgeous. Even more than Lizzy, he thought. Yes, even more than her. She had silver eye shadow on that shimmered in the dark and her lips matched her dress as well.
"Dude, rude to stare," Mason chuckled from the side of him. Though Josh still looked at her.
The girl smiled at the people who stared in awe of her. She thanked the ones who were brave enough to compliment, and nodded to those who gave her looks of envy. She made her way to the center of the dance floor where there formed a small circle. No one wanted to be in the center.
Josh made his way to the center as well, his blue eyes shining through his mask, more defined in the darkness of the room. His eyes on the girl, he moved skillfully through the dancers. She turned, facing away from him. He straightened his mask and the girl shifted her weight to one leg.
He coughed, and she turned. She had the most familiar eyes. A smirk spread on her lips and she turned back around, starting to walk forward. He followed her to a corner of the dance floor. He stopped abruptly when she turned towards him again, smiling.
"Wanna dance?" her voice was smooth and low. Josh nodded, smiling as well. That's when déjà vu set in.
He placed both of his hands on her waist, and her arms traveled to his shoulders in response. He shut his eyes tightly as memories flowed into his mind.
Flashback:
He pulled her in front of him and placed his hand on her hip, pulling her close. She avoided his eyes, looked anywhere but. She knew he was watching her, and she wished he would stop. It was penetrating through her every thought.
Elizabeth placed a hand on his shoulder. He gently lifted their intertwined hands and they began to rock back and forth.
"We're gonna slow things down for now," the DJ announced into the microphone.
The song began.
Is this the end of the moment
Or just a beautiful unfolding
Of a love that will never be?
Or maybe be…
The girl laid her head on his shoulder and Josh felt guilty as heck then. The flashbacks were strong. His shoulder tingled.
Her dizziness got the best of her, and she laid her head on his shoulder.
Under his hands, the fabric of her dress was silky. Her curves were just like Elizabeth's…
Everything that I never thought could happen
Or ever come to pass and
I wonder
If maybe
Maybe I could be
All you ever dreamed,
Josh felt oddly comfortable with this girl. Like he's known her forever, but never met her.
Cause you are, Beautiful inside
So lovely and I
Can't see why I'd do anything without you, you are
He smiled. Her arms tightened. No one was watching them. The girl swayed in his arms, gently humming the song into his ear.
And when I'm not with you
I know that it's true
That I'd rather be anywhere but here without you
He laid his cheek on the side of her head, right above her ear. He felt her smile. He sighed and everyone disappeared. Heck with Elizabeth, this girl was ten time better. She was flawlessly beautiful in the way she moved, the way she smiled the way her head gently lay on his shoulder. He didn't even know her name, yet he knew all he wanted to. She was perfect.
Is this a natural feeling
Or is it just me bleeding
All my thoughts and dreams
In hope that you will be with me or
Is this a moment to remember
Or just a cold day in December?
I wonder
If maybe
Maybe I could be
All you ever dreamed,
Serenity. It was just them, the lights turned to yellow and her dress illuminated. Josh's long ebony hair fell into his eyes and he didn't care for once. All he cared about was this amazing girl.
Beautiful inside
So lovely and I
Can't see why I'd do anything without you, you are
And when I'm not with you
I know that it's true
That I'd rather be anywhere but here without you
Josh frowned again. Elizabeth was in his mind, and she wasn't leaving. The song reminded him of her so much.
Is this the end of the moment
Or just a beautiful unfolding
Of a love that will never be
For you and me?
It was almost over. Just a few more notes. The girl changed her position from her head on his shoulder, to her forehead on his shoulder. Her skin looked porcelain.
Cause you are
You're beautiful inside
You're so lovely and I
Can't see why I'd do anything without you, you are
And when I'm not with you, I know that it's true
That I'd rather be anywhere but here without you.
Endings are never good. He first hand experienced that. The girl stepped away from him, her eyes still closed and the smile still clearly present. She opened her eyes, and Josh couldn't believe how familiar they were. He had to know her. Maybe…
"Take the mask off," he said suddenly, making her head jerk up. Her expression was confused, but she brought her hands up to her mask and lifted it off slowly.
He took a step back. No way.
"Lizzy," he whispered. She looked exactly the same, but different. She looked confused still.
Josh lifted his mask off his eyes as well and she widened her eyes. He laughed, and she blushed.
"Well, this is…" she exhaled shakily, "awkward."
He nodded, but walked slowly to her. She dropped her gaze to her feet. He wrapped his arms around her, surprising her.
"I missed you," he said.
"I'm sorry," she whispered, tears forming.
He hugged her closer, when she said that. He was sorry too.
"You look… wow," he smiled down to her. She looked up and him with watery emerald eyes.
"Josh, about what I said, I didn't mean it. I was stupid…" she sniffed, "I want to be with you now."
"You are," he said, smirking.
She laughed and placed her forehead back to its original position.
The lights dimmed. The music stopped. People were heading towards the exit. But still, they stayed there. Unmoving except for a sniff every now and then from her. He wasn't sure if they were alright, but for now, did it really matter?
A/N: Yay! No. This isn't the ending, there's at least one more chapter. If you haven't heard the song I used here, Anywhere but here by SafetySuit, go listen to it. I would recommend listening to it while you read the story, but that's just me. Thanks for reading! Oh, and I'm so sorry about not posting in such a long time =[ Hope you liked it!!