14. Conscience

Dear diary,

So that is all that happened at the Bronze tonight. Angelus and I decided to go home first because I was deadly in need of some ice cream. Ice cream makes everything better. Wow Angelus. It's still weird to think that Angel is gone. I mean I still love Angel with all my heart and soul, but maybe that's the problem. Sometimes I feel as if my soul is going missing. Angel once told me that your soul leaves when the demon takes over. That's why you have the same memories but can kill; your conscious is your soul. I used to find that weird because Angel was so different than I read Angelus was. I still believe that but sometimes I still look at Angelus and see Angel. I guess I have only known for a little while, but still. Well Angelus is telling me we have to go so bye.

Buffy

"Buff you almost ready to leave," he asks me.

"Yes," I call down and run down the stairs. Angelus and I kiss and we set out to our destination, Drusilla and Spike's place.

I still find it strange that I am voluntarily going to a vampire's crypt and I don't have a stake in my hand. It's not a bad thing, or a good thing, it's just a thing. I still have iffy feelings about that stupid prophecy, especially because I know what side I am leaning towards.

"What are you thinking?"

"How strange it is that I have no stake in my hand," I truthfully tell him.

"You okay?"

"Fine, just feeling strange, like I'm, about to explode. I can't sit still and I just want to go slay, but I don't want to slay vampires. What should I do?"

"Well if it was my way you would go out their and go pillage a town, but."

I stop him, "People still pillage towns?"

"Not really," he sighs, "but it sure as hell was a lot of fun!" I shake my head at him and he lightly punches me. "But just do what you feel is the right thing to do."

"Why are you so nice to me? The truth," I ask.

He thinks about this before answering, "To get you babe. I'm 240+ okay. I think I know how to charm a girl or two and this how I get you. Does that make you feel uncomfortable?"

"No actually it makes me feel better because you are Angelus not Angel. And right now I like you better."

After that realization we continue and eventually reach some random factory that no one else but me would realize is the home to some of the most menacing creatures I have ever known.

We go through the door and I suddenly hear a door shut. "Spike my boy what was that?" Angelus inquires.

"The old bloke is in there and he promised us to not touch us vamps, but I didn't tell him anything about the slayer here. Didn't want him accidently killing her now would we."

"Thanks for that, my childe."

Just then I hear a defining boom of a voice say, "Is that a human I smell? No I smell slayer. They are very humane let me at her?"

It was scary, it even scared the crap out of me and almost nothing scares me. "I am a slayer but I don't think I have 100% of my humanity left."

"Neither do vampires yet if not for this Spike man here they would be gone."

"If you go anywhere near me I will kill you," I vow.

"You silly slayer nothing can kill me," he laughs.

"That's what you think but that was centuries ago, technology has changed."

I swear I heard him gulp.

"Okay mates let us all go into the other room where Dru has some refreshments for us. And no making fun of me for being a gentleman Angelus!"

"Wasn't planning on it William my boy," Angelus laughs. I laugh along with him. The two of them are just so funny when they bicker.

So we walk into a random other room in the factory and sit down on a couch the two of them must have brought. Drusilla seems no where in sight, until I see her carrying a tray of cups.

"Don't worry my Angel it's your favorite," she smiles. He smiles back and I frown. He laughs at me.

"Buffy what would you like," Spike asks. I burst out laughing and the tree vampires stare at me. "What I just figured you didn't want a glass of AB-?"

"It's not that. It's just that you guys aren't as evil as I thought if you are about to serve me tea with sugar," I laugh. Angelus and Spike growl while Drusilla just looks confused.

"Daddy she looks so bright, but the light is dimming. She burns my eyes! Save me please!"

"Dru babe I'm not going to hurt you or punish you anymore we made that clear, use Spike for that." Drusilla frowns. I laugh at her and she runs away.

"Don't mind her," Spike apologizes, "she's been crazier than usual lately. And to your earlier question Buffy we are the top of the clan, we can't be expected to act all uncivil towards each other! We do have class!"

"Sorry I just never figured that," I laugh. Spike cracks me up and if I didn't have my Angelus here I could see myself maybe falling for him. I snuggle into Angelus's arm.

"So Spike Dru was telling the truth the judge is up and running?" Angelus asks.

Spike sighs, "Yes but he's just trouble I tell you. The guy is a giant smurf who can't even do what we ask!"

"You know what smurfs are?"

"No, but they're blue things right?" he asks. I nod.

"So Spike is this the part where I tell you I have to fight you and destroy the judge or should we just skip all of that?"

"Up to you pet? What do you think Peaches?"

Angelus ignores the name, "I think that we send the slayer in there and have a talk with him. Trust me I have a good feeling about her going in there."

"You're not going to get him to destroy me right?"

"No baby, the opposite actually just trust me and lets make this fast because there's something I want to do the second we get back to your place," he wiggles his eyebrows. I giggle and Spike gags.

"Fine, but can we just send him into the room with all of us?"

"Oh Judge man come on out and don't you dare burn my slayer," Angelus screams.

A second later I hear a loud thumping noise and he walks in. I gulp and Angelus shudders. He is menacing.

"What," he shouts.

Something deep down tells me what to say, "Can you try to incinerate me, forget what they just said, just do it?"

"Are you sure Buff," Angelus asks me, sincerely worried.

"I'm sure, do it now," I tell the judge.

I feel a tingle but nothing else. I tense and the judge tries touching me. I calm down, but then the fuzzy feeling stops. "Why did you stop," I ask. "That felt good."

The Judge freezes and looks shocked, "You are the one!"

"The one?"

"Yes. There is an old legend that says the one that is good and indestructible will be the one who will cause my downfall."

"So why aren't you running away?"

"Because there is another part that says that I can give her what she most desires but doesn't know she wants?"

"Which is?"

"I cannot burn you but I can burn your humanity. Your soul will be gone, just like vampires."

I gulp, "But I don't want that," I tell him. "Really I don't!"

"You're boyfriend says differently. I look over and Angelus is smiling.

"Fine, do it. It will make things a lot simpler."

The next thing I know I feel that fuzzy feeling again, and then I'm light headed. Then I feel pain. Maybe he lied and I am dying. I scream

Okay so I am a week later than I planned, but better late then never I always say. So how was the major twist and cliffy? You loved it right. Next chapter things get juicier. Hopefully update next weekend. Oh and like always reviews are my muse's chocolate so review!