Forever and Always Chapter 14, a gilmore girls fanfic

Chapter 14:

Disclaimer: I still do not own Gilmore Girls (if I did, I wouldn't have cancelled the show, I would have made Rory say yes, and I wouldn't sell insurance for a living...)

I should also let everyone know I have been enjoying quite a few Taylor Swift dance parties lately, sooo...she has been some inspiration/motivation for me. I do not own her music or the lyrics to her song Everything Has Changed

All I know, this morning when I woke,

Is I know something now, know something now, that I didn't before,

And all I've seen since 18 hours ago,

Is green eyes and freckles in your smile,

In the back of my mind making me feel right

"Dad, how could I ever think I wouldn't see you tonight." Logan sighed as his father tapped him gently on the shoulder at the end of the dance he and Rory had enjoyed. "How are you this evening?"

"I'm well, Son, and how are you?" Mitchum asked, receiving a nod in response before turning to Rory, "And Miss Gilmore, you look beautiful as always, how are you doing? Possibly more vocal than my son?"

"I am doing very well." Rory smiled, "This is a great...event," she rambled, always feeling stupid when she called 'parties' of this magnitude a party, "thank you so much for letting me come."

"Well, you are the mother of my Grandson, and thankfully Logan hasn't managed to screw it up yet, so we will enjoy your company as much as possible." Mitchum gave her a smile that most people would think was good, but she had learned in a very short time was incredibly deceiving because he was only smiling for show.

"You should see Mason, he gets bigger every day, and looks more and more like Logan every single time I look at him." Rory grinned, "I mean if he can just have his Dad's looks, we are all better off because, I am telling you, 11-17 was an awkward time with me. I would rather Mase can just pass through those phases." she laughed awkwardly as she tried to lighten the mood between the two Huntzberger men.

"Logan I see you have done great work while you were out of town." Mitchum looked back towards his son who had now put an arm around Rory's waist and plastered a smile on his face so that no one would see his clenched jaw that was a result of having to talk with Mitchum.

"Thank you." Logan nodded quickly, "Why don't we go and see Honor and Josh? I haven't see you talk to her tonight?"

"That's because I haven't seen them yet." Mitchum stated matter of factly.

"Well then let's go." Rory agreed as she took the lead towards Honor who was visibly shrinking in her chair. "Did you save my wine?" Rory asked as she took a seat beside Honor, exhaling when she saw that Logan sat to her right, and Mitchum took the seat on the opposite side of Josh.

"Dad, have you seen Mason lately? He is getting so big, he looks just like Logan did at that age." Honor tried to keep the conversation light.

"I have heard." Mitchum nodded, "Where is your mother?"

"Last I saw she was talking to Mrs. Vanderbilt." Honor told him. "You really should go see him this week, Mason I mean, not the Vanderbilt's, I think we've all seen enough of them. But you would just love to see him at such an inquisitive age. I remember how you used to love chasing Logan around the house at that age."

"I doubt that." Logan muttered into his drink, only to receive a glare from Honor and a knowing look from Rory.

I just wanna know you better, know you better, know you better now

I just wanna you know you better, know you better know you better now,

I just want to know you, know you, know you

"Logan used to get into everything," Honor explained to Rory, "and I mean, as you can see from my look's, I am not that much older than my baby brother here, but when he was about 3 and I was 6, I remember he got into Dad's paperwork in his office, and Dad came home, and low and behold, this little blonde haired boy was sitting in his huge desk chair, with Dad's briefcase open, his tiny chin propped up on his hands, elbows resting on the desk, reading the HPG financial documents. So Dad walks into the office -"

"Hon," Logan cut her off, "no one wants to hear about this." he told her, he knew the story well, and even if he hated to admit it, hearing it again broke his heart. It was a moment of his childhood when they had a glimmer of a relationship, it was a moment he looked back on and for a brief moment, he had a Dad who cared about him, and who wanted to be a part of his life.

"It's a good story." Mitchum gave him a half smile as he too thought back on the memory, wondering how everything had gone so wrong so long ago.

"Anyway," Honor ignored her brother, "Dad walked into his office, and found Logan, and Logan just looked up at him and said, 'Daddy, I don't know how you do it. Reading all of this. What will you do when you're too old to read?', and before Dad could answer, Logan just looked at him with the same trademark smile he still has and said, 'you know what, don't worry about it, I'll take care of it.'" Honor laughed, she could see that the story bothered Logan, it had been told at countless parties and family events, at first so that the entire family could take comfort in the fact that Logan would continue in the family business, and as Logan got older and became more rebellious, it was the way his family would let him know how he had become a disappointment, how he had been so promising at such a young age.

"Clearly I wasn't thinking straight." Logan rolled his eyes.

"That's so sweet." Rory put a hand on his back to reassure him, "I'm sure that you and Mason will have a million moments like that."

"Well hopefully the end result is a little bit better." Logan raised his glass to his father, "Right, Dad?"

"Logan you've been doing great work for HPG these last few months. It is great to have you so focused." Mitchum threw an uncharacteristic compliment towards his son. "We are lucky to have you onboard."

"You better consider yourself lucky," Rory smiled, "I know Mason and I miss him while he's gone."

"When you're finished at Yale," Mitchum looked intently at Rory, "do you think that you will travel with Logan?"

"I mean, I'll need to find a job, and then maybe for a bit? But right now I can barely get through one night, much less think about months from now when it's all over." Rory shrugged, "I mean, I think I would be nuts to not want to see the world with my boyfriend and our son, but I also need to support myself."

Mitchum had to admit, the answer had surprised him, he knew from Richard and Emily that Rory had wanted to be a career woman. And now, with a baby, she still wanted to pursue that path, to take care of herself even though her boyfriend could more than take care of the both of them. It was a quality he admired, "Well," he cleared his throat, "once you've graduated, be sure to send applications in to some Huntzberger paper's, i know from your work at the Daily News that we would be lucky to have you." he gave her an unexpected compliment.

"Thank you." Rory smiled, trying to ignore the look of shock on Logan and Honor's faces.

"So dad," Honor dared to push the topic further, "did you hear that Logan and Rory don't have a nanny?"

"Hon." Logan's glance shot to his sister, this is not what he needed tonight.

"Pardon?" Mitchum looked towards his son, "You told me you had hired a baby nurse."

"We were going to," Rory interjected, knowing where the conversation was headed, "but we decided to give it a try on our own, and surprisingly, we found that taking turns and shifts, we could manage, and so rather than waste money on something so trivial, Logan and I both actively raise our son."

Cause all I know is we said 'hello',

And your eyes look like coming home,

All I know is a simple name,

Everything has changed,

All I know is you held the door,

You'll be mine, and I'll be yours,

All I know since yesterday, is everything has changed,

"You don't find that difficult?" Mitchum creased his brow as he looked towards his son, he was shocked to learn that they weren't employing a staff.

"It is hard." Logan nodded, "Sometimes with being gone so much I can miss a lot, and one week he loves peas, but the next he is all about sweet potato, and I mean, obviously," he swallowed the lump that was appearing in his throat as he saw a look in his father's eyes that he didn't think he had seen in nearly 20 years, a look of pride. "Obviously Rory does a lot more than I do, but when I'm home, I will get up with him, and change him, sometimes he likes car rides to get him to sleep. So, maybe it would be easier with a nanny," he admitted, "but I like knowing when he doesn't like peas anymore."

"I had no idea" Mitchum told him, "Honor, thank you for letting me know."

"Just thought you might be interested." Honor shrugged, trying to avoid the glare that Logan was giving her.

"Logan can I speak with you for a moment?" Mitchum stood from his seat, "We can go get another round of drink?"

"Sure, Dad." Logan agreed, leaning to kiss Rory on the cheek before he stood up, "How about you, Josh?"

"I'll stay." Josh mumbled as Honor shot him a glare that suggested it was in his best interest to stay seated.

"So was this some sort of convoluted secret that you were trying to keep from me?" Mitchum asked his son quietly as they walked towards the bar.

"It wasn't a secret, Dad." Logan shrugged, trying to keep himself standing up straight, he hated the effect his father had on him.

"So why did you tell your mother and I that you had a full time nanny?" Mitchum challenged him.

"Because it was easier." Logan stopped walking and stared at his father. "Do you hear the way you and Mom speak to me, even before I had Mason, you look and talk about me like you are just waiting for me to fail, and I didn't need you projecting your dreams for me on my son." he explained, "That story Hon told, where I sat at your desk playing in your papers and we had fun," Logan put emphasis on the last word, "that is the only memory I have of you truly being my Dad. Not being a business man, not being a socialite, just being my freaking Dad, and that is why I hate it when anyone brings it up. For years it was the story you told to try to tell people I would take over the family business one day, but then, I don't know, around the time I got drunk at my first social event, it became the story you used to tell everyone that I was a royal fuck up." Logan continued, his voice low so no one else could hear them. "I hate that story Dad, because all it does is makes me wonder if I really am this self fulfilling prophecy, and if maybe things could have been different if I had parents who cared more about me, and less about the court of public opinion."

"Is that really what you think, son?" Mitchum's eyes were nearly closed as he stared at his son.

"That we didn't love you? That we didn't want the best for you?"

"I think that you're idea of love, and wanting the best was reflected directly in the size of your bank account, and our trust funds." Logan told him, his tone softening, "I don't want to fight with you Dad. Our relationship probably isn't what it should be, but I think if you ask anyone in this room, they'll tell you the same thing about their parents. Except Rory, she'll tell you that her Mom is her best friend. I want better for Mason. I want my son to have the world, because Dad you gave us the world, but I want my son to pursue his own dreams, and I want him to know that no matter what he chooses his path to be, I am proud of him."

"It's taken you years to get that out." Mitchum lamented, "You aren't telling me anything I don't know, Logan. I wish our relationship was different, ours, and even mine with Honor, but it can't change if you lie to us. It can't change if you never let your mother and I see who you are. So maybe, maybe we should all just try a little bit harder to move forward."

xxx

And all my walls stood tall painted blue,

And I'll take them down, take them down and open up the door for you

And all I feel in my stomach is butterflies,

The beautiful kind, making up for lost time,

Taking flight, making me feel right

"You ok?" Rory asked as they drove in silence to Honor and Josh's house.

"I just had a weird conversation with my Dad." Logan explained, Rory had assumed that much based on the way his demeanor changed when he returned from his walk with Mitchum.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Rory asked, shifting in her seat so that she was looking at him.

Logan paused for a moment, trying to come up with a polite way to tell her that no, he did not want to talk about his father, but before he could come up with the sentence, the truth came out. "I don't want to be like him. I don't want Mason to have that kind if disdain for me, I want him to be proud of me, and I want to be proud of him, no matter what he does."

"You will be, Logan, you aren't like your Dad."

"I've been away a lot lately."

"Logan, you travel for business, and you call us at least twice a day, and when you are home, you are devoted to your son. Don't paint yourself with the same brush. What else did your Dad say?"

"It wasn't what he said, it was what he didn't say." Logan sighed as they turned into Honor's driveway. He always found it odd the way she and Josh had immediately moved into a mansion, much like his parents, or the Gilmore house, it was just two of them, but they had 15,000 square feet to prance around in. It just seemed extreme. But then he realized that his mother would have loved to do the same for him and Rory, the difference was that they wanted to work it out on their own, they wanted to start small, and make something of themselves, on their own.

"What did he not say?" Rory repeated as they sat in the driveway, waiting to finish the conversation before getting out of the car.

Logan let out a long sigh, "for a minute, a really short minute, it seemed like he wanted things to be different."

"Maybe he does want things to be different?" Rory countered.

"But I don't know if I can give it a chance." Logan admitted, "Emotionally, I don't know if I can take being beaten up again."

"Why don't we go inside." Rory suggested, realizing they had been sitting in the driveway for about 5 minutes, "We can talk about it at home."

I just wanna know you better, know you better, know you better now,

I just wanna know you, know you, know you,

Cause all I know is we said 'hello',

And your eyes look like coming home,

All I know is a simple name,

Everything has changed,

All I know is you held the door,

And you'll be mine and I'll be yours,

All I know since yesterday is everything has changed

"I thought I saw you guys out there." Honor commented as Rory and Logan walked into the living room.

"We were just talking about Dad." Logan told her as he took a seat, putting his feet up on the coffee table.

"Yes, please, just make yourself at home baby brother." Honor rolled her eyes, "Rory." she stood up and took Rory's arm, "I want to talk to you about something. Come to the kitchen?"

"I...uhh..sure?"

"Well, I think that it is fair to say that we have become close, don't you?" Honor asked as they stopped in the kitchen and Honor immediately grabbed a wine glass, "White okay?" she asked another question.

"White is fine, and yes...I mean, with Mason and you are his aunt and Logan's sister, I would say we are close?" Rory answered cautiously, "I've always considered you my ally in the Huntzberger fortress." she added with a laugh.

"Well good, because as much as I love my baby brother, I have started to enjoy having a sister." Honor explained, "And I know that we talked about Mason being in the wedding, after all he is my only nephew, and heir to the Huntzberger legacy, if you can even call it that." she continued to ramble on. Honor's ramblings were actually one of Rory's favourite things about her, her ability to talk and talk was a gift that made a Gilmore feel right at home. "So I was thinking that maybe, especially because Logan is one of Josh's groomsmen, that maybe you, Rory Gilmore would like to be a bridesmaid?"

"You want me to be in your wedding?" Rory's jaw nearly hit the floor, she hadn't been completely sure where the conversation was headed, but she was flabbergasted that Honor had chosen to ask this of her.

"We're family, you are Logan's family, and Logan is my family, so my extension, you are my family, but more than that, I consider you a friend." Honor told her, "I mean, had your mother not been the coolest socialite ever and run out of the Hartford life, you and I probably would have met a long time ago and been friends, so its just like we've had a late start."

"That is really sweet of you Honor. I would be...honoured to be in your bridal party." Rory raised her glass to Honor. "Here is to you."

"Here is to us," Honor countered, "and the beginning of a beautiful friendship."

"To us." Rory repeated with a smile.

Come back and tell me why,

I'm feeling like I've missed you all this time, oh, oh, oh,

And meet me there tonight,

And let me know that it's not all in my mind,

I just wanna know you better, know you better, know you better now,

I just wanna know you, know you, know you

"What on earth are you girls doing in here?" Logan laughed as he and Josh wandered into the kitchen, "You certainly aren't getting us snacks because there is only a bottle of wine out!"

"Everyone knows I prefer drinking my calories, Logan." Honor stuck her tongue out at her brother. "I think we have some cheese in the fridge? And probably a baguette to throw together a cheese plate."

Rory laughed, at her house, an impromptu snack would be tater tots or bagel bites, not a plate of fancy cheeses, but she had to admit, even though she found herself missing her son, she was enjoying being a grown up for a night. She enjoyed knowing that she and Logan worked in all different dimensions, not just in the role of parents. "Cheese would be great." she smiled as Honor went into the fridge and Logan topped up her glass of wine.

"Well, what a difference a year makes." Josh smirked, surprised that this is where they had all ended up. He had always seen himself with Honor, but he had never seen Logan settling down with anyone, regardless of having a child with them.

"Well, I just conned your girlfriend into being a bridesmaid." Honor told Logan with a triumphant grin.

"I told you she would." Logan took a sip of his drink as Josh began cutting the bread, "I'm telling you, without a kid, everything just seems too quiet."

"You should have brought him tonight." Honor told them seriously.

"He's too young." Logan shook his head, not noticing the fact that Honor looked shocked by his reasoning, "He isn't good with strangers yet, so being passed around would mean he would cry, and then we would have to dress him up, and as adorable as he would look in a tuxedo, and god knows it would make Mom happy, changing a diaper in one of those things would be damn well near impossible."

"I'm sorry, nowhere in that diatribe did you mention Mom and Dad being a reason to leave him at home?"

"Mom and Dad would be fine," Logan shrugged, "they would hold him and laugh with him, but the baby bag, and all that crap...this is not the place for a baby. Well...not here, here is fine for him, but an event like earlier is not the place for a baby."

"Well isn't my baby brother just the king of practical." Honor smirked as she presented the plate of cheese to Rory and Logan, "Dig in!"

xxx

"That was fun." Rory smiled as she rested her head on Logan's bare chest.

"Which part," Logan kissed the top of her head, "what we just did, or the evening?"

"Fun might not be the word I would use to describe what we just did." Rory grinned, "Aerobic might be a better word for that. But tonight, tonight was a lot of fun."

"I'm glad you came."

"You've said that already." Rory told him.

"I wanted to tell you again, that it meant a lot to me that you came, and that you and my sister are hitting it off, and hell, that you can still tolerate my parents."

"Do you want to finish the conversation about your Dad?"

"Right now?" Logan looked at her and shook his head, "No, right now, I want to stay in bed with you and find other aerobic things we can do. The last thing I want to do is talk about my Dad."

"I need a drink." Rory smiled, "Of water," she immediately clarified, "do you want anything?"

Logan shook his head as he put his hands behind his neck and watched as Rory searched the room for his dress shirt and did up a few buttons, enough that she wasn't walking through Honor's house naked. Her hair was tousled and curly, and Logan didn't think he had ever seen anything sexier. "Just hurry back." he told her with a wink.

Rory felt herself blushing as she quietly left the bedroom and walked down the stairs, only to be startled when she found Honor sitting in the dimly lit kitchen.

"Good look." Honor laughed.

"I'm so sorry, I thought you would be in bed, and I just wanted some water, oh my god this is so embarrassing! Rory went bright red.

"Rory, this is no big deal." Honor assured her, "I am just awake, I couldn't sleep, I was thinking about the wedding."

"Are you excited?" Rory asked as she grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge.

"I guess," Honor nodded, "I'm a little bit excited, and a lot terrified, it has just become such a spectacle, you know? And I know, I'm a Huntzberger and I should have expected my mother to throw this big elaborate affair, but sometimes I wish I had a little bit Lorelai Gilmore in me, you know?"

"Lorelai Gilmore?" Rory repeated, having never heard anyone talk about her mother like that.

"Your mom she just...did what she wanted, she basically flipped Hartford off on her way out and never looked back. Sometimes, I wish Josh and I would just go to city hall and get married. That way we could start living our lives as husband and wife and start a family right now, forget waiting for a specific room, or a flower to be in season." Honor explained, "Promise me something?"

"Alright." Rory nodded.

"If you and Logan ever get married, do it for yourselves? I will have had the circus of a wedding, and that means that you and Logan, you can just be yourselves."

"Honor you don't need to sacrifice yourself for us." Rory told her honestly, pulling the white dress shirt a little tighter around her frame as she took a sip of water, "You should still fight for what you want, for who you two are."

Honor shook her head, "It's too late for that." she explained, "The deposits are paid, the invitations are out, the cake is probably already in the oven, or at least a trial run of the cake. At the end of the day, when I walk down the aisle I will be walking down the aisle to the man I love, and my friends and family will be giving me away, and even though the party is a bigger spectacle than I would like, the important parts are what they should be. But you and Logan, you get to have what you want. That is what big sister's do for their baby brother's, they make everything easier for them, we pave the way for them."

All I know is we said 'hello',

And your eyes look like coming home,

All I know is a simple name,

And everything has changed,

All I know is you held the door,

You'll be mine, and I'll be yours,

All I know since yesterday is everything has changed

All I know is we said 'hello',

So dust off your highest hopes,

All I know is pouring rain and everything has changed,

All I know is a new found grace,

All my days I'll know your face,

All I know since yesterday is, everything has changed