Sasuke took a deeper breath, what he was doing was against his better judgment. He should just get away as fast as possible and try to forget. Now he was standing here about to push fingers into the wound. He knew he will be regretting it soon, but he wanted to do it nevertheless. Sasuke knocked and entered without waiting for the answer. He knew the answer wouldn't come anyway.
The yard was like all the others here only that it was very quiet and very empty. Yume was sitting on the porch on the other side. She trailed him with her eyes as him walked towards her. For a long time she didn't take her eyes of him as if deciding how to react. In the end, when he was just couple steps away, she smiled. So brightly as he never saw her smile before. As he never saw anyone smile at him before.
He nodded greetings and sat down next to her. A troop of sparrows was bickering and fighting in the sand. They sat in silence watching them.
He didn't know where to start. He tried remembering when was the last time they spoke.
"It's been a long time, he?"
A not exactly friendly look from Yume.
"When was it that we've last met?"
Arching of an eyebrow. It was clear - she wasn't happy. If about him not showing up for so long or not remembering, he couldn't tell. It occurred to him that she was still such a child, thinking that lives of others rotated around her.
"Almost six years."
Sasuke looked up in surprise. Not happy, but also not angry enough to stay silent, it seemed. "Really…?" He paused. "My years… they go by so quickly…"
She looked at him seriously. "It was shortly after I got the Kyubi seal."
Now he remembered, he had been in Konoha because of an emergency. He had passed her by in the corridor and they had exchanged couple of sentences when he had been hurrying to a council meeting. It must have been summer, as he remembered seeing the seal on her arms and legs. He glimpsed at her – no seal in sight, all covered with a robe. He needed to distract himself from imagining what else was under that robe so he asked:
"Was is difficult?"
She nodded.
"Painful?"
"Yeah, but that was not the issue… It was also so… I don't know… invasive. As if something was entering and merging with me… I don't think you can understand what I mean." She finished looking him.
"I can."
Tilted head.
"During our Chunin exams, I mean, our first exams, I was defeated and… forcibly branded with a cursed seal. Apart from, rather corrosive, power, the seal also contained the chakra of the person that gave it to me." His voice was thick, still it was difficult to talk about it. Funny, it was such a long time ago he even thought save spoke about it. Now he saw it clearly, it was a curse and it was a violation.
"And then?" Yume edged towards him, a shade of concern on her face.
"Then I joined that man. I knew that the seal was just a bait to lure me in but I still went on with it."
"Why…?"
"For power."
"And? Did it bring you the power?"
"Oh, yes… It also ate me from the inside. I did things I'm ashamed of with its help. Because of it. At least I hope that it was because of it…"
"Like trying to kill my mother?"
Oh, he didn't see this one coming. What a well-placed hit. "No. For that I don't even have a cursed seal for an excuse." He had nothing else to say. Because there was nothing to be said in his defense. So he kept sitting, wondering where he would go when he leaves this house.
He saw Yume shift around uncomfortably, it was probably time to go.
"What was the power of that seal?" she blurted out when he was about to get up. Sasuke halted. It sounded as if she wanted to make him stay. And she looked almost embarrassed.
"Increase of chakra level, increase in physical power. It also had a second stage… Then I could even fly…"
Yume's eyes went huge. "Really? How?"
Sasuke felt very stupid. "I was able to… ehem... to grow wings."
Yume snorted with laughter. Ok, maybe that was embarrassing, but at least he was making her laugh, so he continued. "I also looked very differently. Different skin colour, different hair colour." And no, he won't be mentioning the lipstick; he did not fall that low yet.
Yume was taxing him with her eyes. "I would like to see that…."
"Maybe you would, but I wouldn't. Believe me." Deciding it was enough of that free entertainment Sasuke changed the topic. "The fox's power, how do you use it?"
"I build a fox form through Doton and then channel Kurama's chakra into it. Like you suggested." She smiled. "And also it was thanks to you that I had my Earth techniques decently practiced to begin with. I was trying to make those little animals, you know…"
Sasuke smiled back. "Can you show me? Some small version."
Yume jumped down to the sand of the yard. "Small version." She folded her palms into Doton sign and then plunged hand into the ground. A little Kyubi, size of a normal fox rose from the surface. It was perfect, down to the shape of the ears and backward bent of the forelegs' joints. Yume placed her hand on the creature. Blazing lines crept as if from her sleeve and traveled to the fox. It came alive as orange chakra covered it and Yume withdrew her hand. The same moment little fox jumped snarling at Sasuke, landed on his chest and was about to bite, when the glow suddenly disappeared and fox crumbled into a small heap of sand on his lap.
"Gome… He doesn't like you…"
"Feeling well reciprocated."
"Kurama himself would never behave like that. He has more self-respect than that. This part that I carry though… There's nothing conscious about it."
"I see… You can't talk to it, then?"
"No. But I talk to real Kurama."
Ha, wonder if the fox is talkative. Sasuke hoped that it was not the case.
Next day he came again. Yume was at her usual spot.
"Not going to see Chunin exams?"
Shake of head.
"Not interested?" Sasuke himself didn't see the exams for good ten years or more, and even if interested was an overstatement, he wouldn't say no…
"Don't know anyone who is taking this year. I'll go next time, for Ashoka."
"How was it with Hiro last year?"
"Thrilling." She made it sound like a bad thing. "Thank gods he passed. He is so difficult to motivate. Doesn't want to adjust to the system."
"I think I get him… I hated both of my Chunin exams. I hate this idea of putting my ability on public display for someone to judge."
Yume was dangling her legs down from the porch. "Hmm... if you put it this way… Good I didn't think about it like that back then. We were all proud and excited taking the Chunins. You know, first Uchiha since gods know when… Ah, well, since you…" She finished awkwardly.
Sasuke glimpsed sidewards. Yup, she was definitely embarrassed, even a bit reddish on the cheeks. "You mean first or second time? I'm probably the only Uchiha in the history that had to participate twice…" He almost wanted to pat himself on the shoulder, because the joke worked. A smile cracked up on Yume's face.
"How was it the second time?"
"Humiliating. They sealed away whole our chakra. Amazing how lame you feel without it. But, at least I fared better than Naruto…"
Yume giggled. "Funny, he always says the opposite."
"Hn. Clear nonsense. He relies so heavily on his Shadow Clones that he's next to useless in a solo-taijutsu. Not to mention shuriken-jutsu and so on - I can hit a concealed target not using any chakra at all." He couldn't believe he was doing this. Bragging about being better than Naruto. In front of a girl. But at least she was laughing.
Then, he didn't come for a couple of days due to council meetings, and Naruto monopolizing whatever was left from his time.
On the third day when he entered Yume's house he was greeted by a sound of a row. Two voices shouting, clearly no one was listening to another anymore. He entered the yard just in time to hear Gen calling Yume a stubborn idiot while she was yelling at him to shut the fuck up. Standing opposite one another, they looked like two seconds more and the quarrel would go from verbal to physical.
They noticed his presence simultaneously, and turned, all their rage misplaced and focused at him. He instinctively edged back as the blow of hostility hit him.
Sasuke reassessed his reaction – it wasn't that incorrect in the end. Those two could probably take him on. Separately – no; but together, with their no doubt perfect teamwork and him underestimating their abilities… Maybe they could even defeat him?
But he couldn't deliberate on it further as the air changed. Recognizing the intruder, Yume spun and sat down with her back demonstratively towards her brother.
Gen shot him a wide grin. "Ok, I'm gone from here." He said in tone of announcing great news. Yume sent him another deadly glare and he scrammed.
Sasuke felt a bit out of place. Yume was sitting at the edge of the porch, half turned away from him, knees curled to her chest. Her foot was tapping a nervous rhythm.
"Should I go as well?"
A shake of head.
Sasuke sat down.
The rhythm slowed down. Now it sounded more like an angry battle march until it ended with a loud stomp. "Gen pisses me off."
Sasuke decided not to comment on the obvious.
"He doesn't know when to stop." She turned abruptly. "I shouldn't have yelled…" she finished with guilt in her voice.
"I wouldn't know how it is with siblings. But with a real good friend – you can yell at him whatever you like, and he won't ever give up on you."
Yume sighted. "No, he wouldn't. Always, no matter how horrible I behave, he never does. He's the only who can stand me."
"Now, that's a very unjust thing to say. You have tons of people who care about you." Sasuke knew she didn't mean to but somehow it struck a wrong vein in him. She didn't know the meaning of true loneliness. Her solitude was voluntary.
Something of these thoughts must have been visible on his face as Yume looked at him sheepishly. "I shouldn't have said it either, should I? Now I offended you as well."
"No." He said after a while. "No, you didn't. I don't get offended by it anymore."
"It's just… With all the others, it's so difficult; I always feel I need to be on guard. That I cannot, or rather that I don't want to show what I feel. I dislike it so much about myself. Just that there are so few people with whom I am… I don't know…" She broke off.
"… at ease?" he hinted. Yume nodded.
He had a question: "And with me?" at the tip of his tongue. He knew that she talked to him more and more openly than with most of the others. Sakura often complained about one-sided conversations she was having with Yume. "Talking to her is like talking to a wall. Or to you." - Sakura used to write. His conversations with Yume were nothing like that. She never looked uncomfortable around him either.
So that would have been a really stupid question. And a humiliating one as well, but he was willing to suffer this humiliation in order to hear it from her. What a moronic idea – he bit at it, chewed it and swallowed.
"Yeah… me too." He said instead. Apparently it was a wrong thing to say because Yume blinked, looking as she was about to cry. "So, what was it about with Gen?" He tried changing the topic.
"What do you care?!" The level of distress in her voice was high again. "Why would you care?"
"Why? Because I happen to care about your feelings?" He said defensively.
"No! No, you don't! You don't at all! Doesn't it shame you to sit here and lie like this? You would behave differently if you did! You'll disappear any day now and won't even say goodbye, will you? Oh, I know, pass me a message through my father, that will be great!"
Sasuke stared.
"Go on, just leave already! Leave!"
She turned away from him. She was shaking but he couldn't tell if it was from crying or anger.
"Yume…"
"Leave!" There were no tears in her voice, only fury.
Despite of it Sasuke remained seated. He was among the best in analyzing a situation, but for this he needed a moment. It was the same feeling as during a fight - he almost felt cogs turning in his brain, scrutinizing opponent behaviour, looking for clues. That last exchange he heard from her quarrel with Gen, Gen grinning at him. Yume's distress at the prospect of him leaving. And his apparent complete screw-up from the last year – how could have he known that she would be so upset? To all the logic she shouldn't be, unless… The realization hit him with sudden light. Unless she was already then waiting for him.
If it was true, it would be… mind boggling. His lack of belief was fighting his logic. If she was an opponent, he would act on his assumption. But she wasn't. And he should ask her openly.
How was he supposed to do it?
He moved, shifted his knees under himself.
"Yume. Before I go, I need to ask you something. To tell you something." He tried making his tone as serious as possible, to goad her to turn back to him. It worked, she was looking at him with challenge in her eyes. So black, that he couldn't tell pupils from irises. There can be anything in these eyes. Anything and everything. Was there something for him in there?
"Over the last year…" Talking was surprisingly difficult, words were not really coming out as they should. "Over the last year, I realized that I harbour certain… feelings. Towards you." He glimpsed at her. Still unreadable, eyes huge. Out of bewilderment? Offense? Disgust? He planted both palms on the floor and bent a bit forward. He looked down, it will be enough to hear it, he didn't need to see it as well. "I know that I am unsuitable and unworthy in every possible way, but do you imagine that you could… reciprocate… those feelings?" He looked up, suddenly finding courage in a corner he didn't even know existed in him. "Could you love me back?"
Yume bent her lips into something between a smile and a crying grimace. He saw two big tears forming and a rolling down her cheeks. He jerked his hand, wanting to wipe them away, but she was quicker. She brushed forcefully at her eyes and nodded. He never thought one could put so much conviction into a nod. That was the answer, he figured out from a still teary but bright smile now directed at him. He smiled back on instinct, still not having the situation wholly processed.
They were sitting at an odd distance – too close for casual conversation, too far for direct contact. Not that Sasuke had in mind initiating any; whole situation was tricky enough without it.
"So, what now?" Yume must have felt the same way. She had a deep blush going down her neck. Was she thinking he was going to kiss her or something? Well, that would probably be the usual course of events, if they were both teenagers…
"Now I'm going to talk to your parents. Try to get their acceptance. Somehow." Sasuke started to collect his thoughts. He looked up searching for inspiration; that was going to be quite a mission.
Yume nudged his knee. He looked at her and answered her question, deciding to turn it into a joke. "I'm trying to figure out whom should I be more afraid of: your mother or father."
"Mum. Definitely mum."
Sasuke chuckled.
"Father never gets angry, and he rarely forbids. He trusts our judgment. That's why we try so hard not to disappoint him. And you… there is nothing in you that could disappoint him. Mum though… she gets emotional."
"Yes, that she does. Now I will know how Naruto felt all those years being on receiving end of her rage. Problem is that I will need to search for a different medic, after she breaks all my bones…" Sasuke was trying to speak lightly, but inside he was troubled. Sakura can take it very badly, on many levels. First of all, as a betrayal of trust. Then she might think that he will make her daughter unhappy. That he was a bad choice. And he won't have much speaking for him, because he so far proved to be good only at being away. He wasn't that sure as Yume about Madara's reaction either… And that could go much worse than couple of broken ribs he would unavoidably get from Sakura.
Yume nudged his knee again, searched the eyes contact. "Don't worry. I'll protect you."
A joke from Yume, first one he's ever heard. "Thanks. I may need it."
"And then? Will you leave again? Go for a mission?"
"Then? No… I won't be going anywhere. I'll stay…" That was suddenly so obvious, so self-evident that it surprised him as well.
"Won't you miss it? The journey? The road?"
Sasuke looked up. Wind was pushing the clouds across the rectangle of the sky above the yard, as blue as it only is in autumn. It would be difficult to walk against such a wind.
"No… It served its purpose."
"What was its purpose?"
"To find redemption."
"And did you?"
He centered his attention back at her. "Apparently I did."
Yume smiled. Sasuke decided he will start keeping count of her smiles, not to forget any single one.
"And then?" This smile was foxy and shy in the same time.
"Then… Then I will ask you to marry me."
Apparently she had her emotions well under control already, as her expression didn't change. She bent forwards, planted one hand on the floor. Other one she wound around his neck. Not a hug or an embrace, but more of a hold. Sasuke stiffened. She was so close that he could feel warmth radiating from her on his cheek.
And then, almost inaudible: "Ask me now."
He turned his head a bit; with lips almost touching her ear he whispered. "Will you marry me?"
"I will."
Sasuke closed his arms around her.