Chapter 14: All the Happiness

Bright pink and purple streamers covered the walls and the ceiling. Claire had gotten a picture of Kate and created the game pin the tiara on the bride. She had invited Sun over and now the two women were sitting across from each other talking about their lives and how unbelievably happy they were. They ignored Kate, the party pooper.

She refused to pin a tiara on top of her head, she did not want to open the gifts from Claire and Sun, because she knew the contain pieces of skimpy barely there lingerie. Kate sat at the edge of the couch, her chin resting in her palm. She felt as if at any moment she could burst into tears, it was less the fifteen hours now… time seemed to be flying by.

"Kate?" asked Claire. She walked over and sat in front of Kate. Kate looked up at Claire, her eyes full of sadness and depression. Claire titled her head to the side and then sighed. She took Kate by the hand and led her to the front door of her house.

"What are you doing?" asked Kate her voice cracking.

"I am telling you to go and do what you need to," Claire said firmly, "I haven't been a very good friend to you lately… and well… I am going to make it up to you, okay? Just go alright we'll be here when you decide to come back. You need to go into tomorrow with no regrets, okay?"

"I'm be right back," Kate said sincerely, "Be right back…maybe"

"I hope not," Claire said giving Kate a one arm hug.

Kate sprinted up the path to Jack's front door, her heart was pounding so hard that it seemed at any moment it would explode out of her chest and onto the cement below. She reached the front door, for the first time in weeks she cared about how she looked. She ran her fingers through her hair and attempted to smooth the wrinkles out of her shirt. She knocked on the large oak door three times and waited.

Jack opened the door and just stared at her, Kate could not tell if he was angry or pleased to see her. He looked at her for a moment and then spoke.

"What are you doing here?"

"I want to talk to you," Kate was able to spit out. Couldn't he see how desperate she was to talk to him, just to look at him? It had been three weeks, three whole weeks since she had seen him. It was driving her insane, eating her to the core.

"I have nothing to say to you," Jack said despite the urge to wrap his arms around her and kiss all her sorrows away, "Please leave."

"No," Kate said stepping towards him, "Please Jack… please baby…"

"Fine," Jack said his harsh demeanor melting away. She made him weak. "Come in."

Kate walked into the house and noticed there were boxes all over the kitchen. Each of them was labeled with Jack's name and an address in New Mexico. Kate walked over to one and peered inside, the painting that was on his bedroom wall was in there along with several times wrapped in newspaper and bubble wrap.

"You're moving?" Kate asked softly. She turned to Jack who had his arms crossed in front of him. He was blocking her out; he would not let her in again.

"Yes," Jack said icily, "I am leaving tomorrow."

"Tomorrow?" Kate asked her heart breaking into another piece. How could he leave her? She wanted to throw her arms around him and beg him not to go, "Why?"

"Why?" Jack asked with a bitter laugh, "Are you actually asking me that, Kate?"

"Yes," Kate answered, "We are supposed to be friends… you could have told me!"

"Friends!" snapped Jack laughing loudly, "How can we be friends Kate?"

"I have to be friends with you Jack," said Kate weakly. She grabbed a hold of the counter top to stop herself from falling over. "I love you Jack."

"Don't say that," Jack whispered turning his back to her. He began to walk away. He had to get away from Kate…he had to get away now.

"Stop!" Kate yelled angrily. She walked after him and turned him around, she was grasping the front of his shirt in her fists, "Can you look me in the eyes and tell me that you don't love me back? You told me that you did! Was it a lie?"

Jack looked away from her; he would not look at her. If he looked at her he knew that he would confess. Looking into her eyes made him frail… she was the only person who made him feel that way.

"Jack!" Kate was shaking him. Jack turned his head and stared right through her. Kate felt thousands of butterflies come into her stomach. She whispered menacingly to him, "Tell me the truth."

"I love you," Jack admitted escaping her grasp, "I love you more then you can even imagine! Are you happy now? You know the truth. I have loved you since the first moment I saw you on the island, even when you ignored me…despite our distance for five years. I never stopped loving you."

Kate covered her face with her hands and began to sob. Her chest was heaving up and down, she could not breathe and she could feel was all the emotions she had bottled up for so long leave her body. She felt weak, about to crumple to her knees.

"Why are you crying?" Jack asked unable to shield his concern for her. He walked to her and put his hands on her shoulders.

"It's not fair," Kate, said her grief gone, all sadness disappeared, now she was mad. "It's not fair that I can't be with you."

"Be with me?" Jack said taking a step away from her, "Would you come with me? Would you go home, pack up all of your things, and move to Albuquerque with me?"

"Yes," said Kate with no thought, "I would."

"No," Jack said shaking his head, he turned his back on her again, "You wouldn't. There would be one thing stopping you… Sawyer, you may not love him anymore. But you could not hurt him. It's not in your nature, you couldn't leave him, could you Kate?"

"No," Kate said her voice at its normal tone. "I couldn't… but I love you so much it hurts me knowing that…" Her voice faded off. She looked up at the ceiling and then down at the floor, "we are soul mates Jack."

"And sometimes soul mates don't end up together," said Jack. He watched as Kate's heart, already broken, broke again. This was a woman standing in front of him telling him everything he had wanted to hear. He had wanted to hear these words from her for so long… and here he was telling her no. Telling her that they could not be together.

"You are breaking my heart," Kate said a single tear running down her cheek.

"I know," Jack said softly walking towards her. "I'm so sorry." He took her by the hand and led her to the front door. He opened it and walked with her outside. He dropped her hand and looked into her hazel eyes. They were so full of anguish and defeat… he could see her soul shriveling, the glow that came from it defusing.

"Please Jack," Kate begged, "Don't turn me away."

"I love you Kate," Jack said firmly, "I may not like Sawyer, but I respect him. I run want to run away with you and keep you for myself, but I won't because it would not be right. You are engaged to another man. It hurts to turn you away. But you need to marry Sawyer like you promised. I will always love you baby, remember that."

"Jack," replied Kate like a child, she grabbed a hold of his hand. Jack took a step away; he continued to walk until their arms could stretch no farther.

"I wish you happiness," Jack said his voice strong, "I mean it with all my heart Kate, I wish you only the best."

Their hands broke apart; Jack did not look at her. He kept his head down as he walked into the house and closed the door behind him. Kate stood there, paralyzed in shock. She had not expected this to happen… she had hoped and prayed for the exact opposite. She had wished for it so hard that she had begun to expect it. And now… it was over. It was really over.

Kate made the way back to the car; she was able to get inside before she collapsed against the steering wheel, pounding the front of the car with his fists. He made her cry more then Sawyer ever had, Sawyer had never rejected her like Jack had just done. Sawyer wanted to marry her and Sawyer wanted to be with her for the rest of his life. Jack and Sawyer both loved Kate, but Kate only loved one back.

To be continued…