"I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell. I know, right now, you can't tell, but stay a while and maybe then you'll see, a different side of me." - Unwell by Matchbox 20

My Brand New, Secret, (And Fake!) Boyfriend

Chapter 14

Chapter 14! 50 REVIEWS! PERSONAL FUCKING VICTORY! Thanks for Pinkkurry for being my 50th reviewer for this story! Also, I have a poll on my page you should vote on because it decides what I write you guys for Christmas. ^_^
Anyway, recap of chapter 13!

The pinkette contained her laughter and went into her bedroom, pulling out the recording Neji had sent her, explaining in detail, Lee's plan. She showed the phone to Naruto and Ayame first, then to Sasuke, then finally to her blonde roommate.
"Seriously?!" Naruto exclaimed.
"Uh-huh." Sakura was biting her lip, trying to stop her ear-to-ear grin.
"Well, what do we do, 'tebayo?"
"I know exactly what we'll do." Ino said, letting her own grin explode onto her lips.

"That seems... risky." Ayame said nervously.
"I agree." Sasuke said.
"Me too, 'tebayo."
"I think we could pull it off." Sakura said. Ino agreed, as did Hinata, who had come out of hiding in her bedroom, but Sasuke, Naruto and Ayame stayed away from the idea.
"C'mon Sasuke-kun!" Sakura whined. "If you don't play along it won't work!" He sighed.
"I don't know why I should."
"Because! You're my boyfriend and Lee is suspicious of that, so we have to remove his doubt and he'll be off my back and-" His hand was placed over her mouth.
"I'm heard what we have to do." He said in almost a whisper.
"Mghse cnsnamche smgmgbf." Sakura said behind his hand. He removed his hand so she could breathe.
"Okay," She said after a few gulps of air. "PLEASE will you?" The onyx-eyed boy sighed again.
"Pleeeeeeeease?!" His eyes traveled to his shoes, the ceiling, Ino, who looked very hopefully at him, and back to his "girlfriend".
"... Fine."
"Yes!" Sakura said, throwing her arms around his and pecking his lips.
"Thank you Sasuke-kun!" Ino said happily.
"So, this is all going down at the Halloween party?"
"Mmhmm. But remember, it's costumes only!" Ino said, winking and disappearing into her bedroom.
"I know!" Ayame said. "Let's all go costume shopping together! The four of us, like a double date!"
"Sounds fun!" Sakura said happily.
"Hn."
"Okay sure, 'tebayo!"

The group of four proceeded to the bus stop and waited patiently for a bus to the big Halloween store on Fifth street.
"This is gonna be soooooooo fun!" Ayame said happily.
"Yeah!" Naruto agreed, draping an arm around his girlfriend's shoulder.
"Mmhmm!" Sakura said.
"Hn." Go ahead. Guess.

The bus came to a stop in front of a large store. Halloween City.
"Yay!" Ayame said, grabbing Naruto's hand and forcing him to run as fast as she did inside. Sakura and Sasuke simply walked inside slowly.
"You kissed me." Sasuke said after a couple seconds.
"I... I know."
"Why?"
"Cuz that's what girlfriends do, right?"
"Well yeah, but you're not my girlfriend."
"I'm pretending to be aren't I?"
"I guess."
"SAKURA-CHAN! LOOK at this cute costume I found!" Ayame screamed, grabbing Sakura's wrist and dragging her to the women's costumes.
"It's kinda slutty, don'tcha think?" Sakura asked.
"Okay, maybe a little, but it's super cute right?! And it's not like Ino-chan won't wear something twice as bad as this..."
"Well, you're not wrong about that..." Sakura replied. "I think it'd totally work on you!"
"Thanks!" Ayame replied. "But I already have a costume. Whatever! I'll get one size up and wear it next year! Now, what should we get you? Hmm... How about Sexy Nurse? Cuz, ya know, you're going to medical school?"
"Umm, no."
"Don't be such a SQUARE!" Ayame said, pulling the costume off the shelf and holding it up to Sakura's figure.
"Ooh it looks GREAT!" Sakura facepalmed.
"A-are you sure?"
"Yeah!" Sakura held up the costume in front of a mirror. The skirt stopped only about three inches after her butt did. The neckline went so far down she was afraid her bellybutton would show if she wore it. There was a stethoscope and a little hat too.
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah totally!" The pinkette cracked.
"Fine. But I'm NOT charging THIS to my credit card."
"I'll make Naruto-kun pay for everything, don't worry!"
"I wonder what Sasuke-kun and Naruto and getting..." Sakura said, trying not to let her friend hear her. But she did.
"Let's go see!" She grabbed Sakura wrist and they made their way to the men's costumes.

"So dobe," Sasuke said, watching his friend fish through racks of clothes. "How're things with Ayame?"
"Good, 'tebayo. I mean, you still can't have her b-"
"I don't want her. But she's like Sakura, right?"
"I still can't believe you want dating advice from me, teme."
"Shut up." Sasuke said.
"So, aren't you looking for a costume?"
"No." Naruto stopped what he was doing.
"Why not?"
"Because Halloween is stupid."
"How the hell is free candy and dressing up like anything you possibly want stupid?"
"That question answers itself."
"You're such a SQAURE!"
"Hn."
"I know!"
"What?"
"You and Sakura should go as Ulquiorra and Orihime from Bleach!"
"... What?" Ice clung to his words. A couple from an anime?! Absolutely not. Even though it was a good idea and the pair could completely pull it off, he didn't like the idea of getting dressed up in the first place.
"Just think about it!" Another voice said. Ayame.
"But still, I don't think me and Sasuke-kun could pull off UlquiHime..."
"Besides, it looks like Sakura already found a costume." Sasuke said, his eyes trying to avoid the short-skirted costume in his "girlfriend's" hands.
"You could be a doctor then!" Ayame said, pulling a costume off the rack and holding it up, quickly replacing it with a bigger size.
"Umm..."
"I think it's a GREAT idea, Sasuke-kun!"
"I don't."
"Well, I don't know care. We're going in couples costumes if it kills you."
"If it kills ME?!"
"Yup. Cuz I'll be the one that kills you." Sasuke inwardly gulped.
"Fine. Gimme that stupid thing Ayame." She handed it to him.
"Yay!"
"So, what're you two going as?"
"Sheldon and Amy from Big Bang Theory."
"Really?" Sakura asked. "I'd think you two would go as Leonard and Penny."
"Nope! We wanted to be the nerds!" Ayame said happily.
"Let's go! The party's tomorrow and I promised Ino-chan I'd help her put up decorations, 'tebayo." Naruto said, rubbing his hair with one hand.
"Finally." Sasuke said.

A few minutes later, the group was sitting on the uncomfortable chairs of the bus back to the Princeton campus. Naruto and Ayame sat close together, Ayame's arms linked around his. Sasuke and Sakura sat next to each other, but proceeded to text each other instead of speak so Naruto and his girlfriend wouldn't hear them.

I can't believe ur going as something so slutty.
Well I can't help it. Ayame forced me 2
Uh huh...
Drop dead
Anyway, we should really consider the possibility that Lee's gonna kill us both if he figures out we know his "genius plan"
Whatever Lee won't figure it out He's too stupid too
K, but whatre we gonna do about this party?

Well, we kinda have to act like an actual couple and we haven't been on an actual "date" since I got here.
I hear ya. Then let's go on a date!
I'm not really the kinda guy who dates

Sakura punched him in the shoulder. Hard.
"What the hell?!"
"What?"
"I said, what the hell?!"
"Just shut up about that whole stupid thing! You'll do as I say or ELSE." Sasuke didn't want to know what "or else" meant, so he agreed and silently went back to his phone.

You're so mean
Well, sometimes I need to be mean
Hn
Even in TEXTS ur gonna ignore me?!
Hn
I hate you
Then I'll go back to Harvard
NO DON'T!
That's what I thought :)
T_T*
haha
T_T****
Say what u want Saku, you know you'd be screwed without me
T_T********

You really do annoy me Sasuke kun
I think I know that
T_T****************
I think just one '*' will get ur point across...
Fine. T_T*
Look, the bus is stopping.

The pair looked up from their phones and got off, Naruto and Ayame following in suit.
"So Sakura-chan," Ayame said. "How's this gonna work anyway? From what I can tell, Ino pulled that plan out of her butt and didn't even begin to consider what could go wrong..."
"Ino's like that," Sakura replied. "But from what I could tell, Naruto has to completely avoid me at all costs. To him, it's like I have Swine Flu or something. If we don't talk, Lee can't start his plan at all."
"And I have to be the best boyfriend ever."
"But you aren't her boyfriend, 'tebayo..." Naruto said, scratching his head, confused.
"You dobe..."
"I already knew that," Ayame said with a shrug. "You two don't act like a real couple. Although, kissing Sasuke was a good move and something any respectful girlfriend who has a boyfriend as hot as Sasuke Uchiha would do."
"Excuse me?"
"What? He's hot, any girl in the world could say that, dating, lesbian or not." She said blatantly. Sakura giggled.
"Thanks, Ayame-chan, but I think that Sasuke can pull off "World's Best Boyfriend" for one night."
"I dunno... He seems kinda sketchy. Have you ever been in a real relationship, Sasuke-kun?"
"No."
"A date?"
"No."
"Have you ever been told by a girl that they liked you?"
"Yes. 2,485 times actually." A vein throbbed in the raven-haired girl's forehead.
"N-no! I meant that have YOU ever told a girl you liked THEM?"
"Ooh. No."
"But then why'd you agree to this, 'tebayo?"
"Shut up, Naruto..."
"You mean Sasuke-kun has a crush on me?"
"I'm led to believe that, 'tebayo." The blonde replied.
"Let's just go home." Sasuke said, opening the dorm building doors.
"You do like me don't you?" Sakura replied, poking his cheek.
"If you three are going to falsely accuse me, I'm going to go back to my own college." The Uchiha said sternly.
"Well aren't you just a party-pooper..." Ayame said, rolling her eyes and crossing her arms.
"Just being honest." He replied.

Three days dragged on forever. By the time Friday came, Sakura was ready to quit the plan altogether. She was fed up with all the decorations in her dorm and the fact that she couldn't sit down for twenty seconds without Ino saying she needed something done. Naruto and Ayame were almost never around because of this, and Hinata had spent the past few days practically living in the school's library.
"Aren't you soooooooo excited for tonight, Sakura-chan? I know I am!" Ino cooed to her roommate, who was presently trying to take a quick nap on the couch.
"Hn..." She grunted, turning over.
"Sasuke-kun sure has rubbed off on you. He's such a terrible boyfriend..."

Oh yeah. Sakura thought. Ino-chan doesn't know that Sasuke isn't my boyfriend. I should probably tell h-
What are you thinking?! That is NOT a good idea! Inner screamed at her.
What, why not? Don't Ino and Hinata deserve to know about this by now?
No, they don't. Sakura, there is only reason you still have a "relationship" with Sasuke-kun, and that is the fact that almost nobody knows. Naruto and Ayame-chan are good people who know when to keep their traps shut. Well, maybe not Naruto, but you get my point right? If you tell Hinata she'll tell Ino, and if she tells Ino, Ino will tell EVERYONE.
Dammit. I hate it when you're right...
Damn right, I'm right! Shannaro!
T_T*
What is with you and that face this week?! First with Sasuke texting, and now to your own Inner! I cannot believe you!
Oh shut up. I've been annoyed a lot this week. These people give me headaches.
Uh-huh.
What does "uh-huh" mean?
Nothin'...
Bullshit. What does it mean?
If you do the face I'll-
T_T*
SKDNJEKWHX
:)
You are such an idiot?! And how can you even USE emoticons?! That should be like, impossible! You're TALKING to me!
Meh.

"Hey Sakura-chan, could you help me with this food? I just need you to help put it in the fridge. I PROMISE I'll do all the cooking." Ino called from the door.
"Yeah sure, whatever." She was glad to be away from Inner. She sure could be a bitch sometimes.

Sakura stood up, walking to the fridge and throwing it open, setting all of the groceries in the appropriate place-
"Ino-chan? Is this vodka?"
"Huh? Oh god, gimme that!" She snatched it up and threw it in a cabinet.
"Why did you buy that? HOW did you buy that? You're only nineteen!"
"I had a guy buy it for me, of course. It wouldn't be a fun party if the punch wasn't spiked, Forehead." My childhood nickname. What a little ugly bitch.
"Look, Piggy," I said. "You're under-aged, everyone is. We shouldn't be doing that."
"You're such a square. Now just let me do my cooking."
Suddenly, the door handle was turned and Sasuke walked in, holding up a grocery bag full of candies.
"Yay! You got the right kind of candy!" Ino ran over and snatched up the bag.
She turned to Sakura. "He got the wrong candy when we went to the store earlier and I made him go back for the right kind."
"Ah." Sasuke sat down on the couch and sighed, turning on the TV.
"Sasuke-kun? Is something wrong?"
"No. Why?"
"No reason. You just seem a little depressed, that's all." Sakura said.
"I'm just ready to go back to Harvard." He replied.
"Oh... Well, you can go back as soon as the party's over!" She replied cheerfully.
"Okay. I'm just starting to think my professors are going to have a wheelbarrow of homework for me since I've been here for over a month..."
"Oh! Well, just call and ask 'em for your homework!"
"I guess I'll do that." He said, grabbing his phone and walking outside.
"I doubt that's why he wants to leave..." Ino said after he was gone.
"What do you mean?"
"I'm just saying, Sasuke-kun could probably get out of shitloads of homework with those looks, why would he care?"
"Hey, he's mine, keep your socially awkward penguin, Ino-chan."
"Socially...? Oh! That's mean to say about Sai-kun!"
"Uh-huh." (Thank you, Ayu-san and Emma for the Penguin comment XD)
"But anyways, Sasuke's probably just bored of staying here for so long."
"He's going home tomorrow!"
"That's right! The Halloween party's tonight, isn't it?!"
"Yup!" She cackled like a witch. "And you better be there girlie." Sakura nodded and rolled her eyes.
"Whatever, Ino-chan. I'm gonna go study. I have a biology test tomorrow."
"Kk! Well, see you at the party tonight, Saku!"

DAMMIT, DAMMIT, DAMMIT, DAMMIT, DAMMIT! 2dhwifmanencaldd4$3&(!2cbwofn *smashes face on keyboard* I wanted to end that fucking party this chapter! AUGH! *rips hair out* then again, it's probably for the best since its like three am here and I told myself I wouldn't go to bed until I finished this chapter... Well anyway, see ya chapter 15! -Chiharu-chan!