Chapter 14

While Diego and his father talked in the library, Felipe wandered aimlessly through the hacienda and without realising where he was going, he ended up in the stables. His pony whinnied his greeting as Felipe gently rubbed his nose before he reached over and grabbed the brush from the shelf and slowly began to groom his pony; the broad sweeping motions always relaxed him and he definitely needed to calm himself.

His mind and heart conflicted with his desire to know his real family and the uncertainty of what that knowledge would bring. He paused in his task, reached under his shirt and pulled the chain that held his medallion and gazed at the only reminder that he had of his parents. He barely recalled anything of that time, he had been too young to remember much except for the time Diego had found him alone, hungry and so frightened, so very frightened.

He slumped against the pinto in pain as that horrible time came back to him in a rush. He remembered that he had somehow crawled out from under the cart and there was a woman laying nearby on the ground, a woman who he knew was his mother. Hot tears burned his eyes as recalled that he tried to wake her up but he couldn't speak. Then came more explosions around him and strangely he couldn't hear them which made him even more terrified. So he did the only thing that a scared little boy would do; he ran. He didn't know where he was going, he only knew that he wanted to get away from the nightmare that he was in.

Felipe gripped the medallion in his fingers, he didn't even remember seeing his father but he must have been there too. He knew in his heart that his father would not have left him or mama behind, he would have saved them if he had been able to. The only thing he could recall of his father was a memory of being lifted high onto his shoulders and laughing together. Occasionally when he helped the vaqueros in mending fences, the fragrance of the newly cut wood, sent him back to some memory of his childhood that gave him a wonderful, happy feeling. He often wondered what that memory was and why it made him feel happy.

As he started brushing his horse once more, he knew that the only person who could help him with his memories was his aunt. He shook his head, he simply couldn't take it in, he had an aunt! Perhaps he even had cousins or even grandparents who were still alive. It was something that he never thought possible, that he would have his own family, no matter how much he longed for it. He finally admitted to himself that he was thrilled by the knowledge that he had family, family that he wanted to meet.

He knew it wouldn't be like the last time when that horrible woman claimed to be his mother and took him away from his home, especially as Diego had no doubts about Señora Chavez being his aunt. He never blamed Diego for letting him go with that woman, they had both been tricked by her. But in a strange way, Señora Delanoso had actually helped them, if it wasn't for her, he would never have known that he had an aunt. If Señora Delanoso never arrived in Los Angeles, she would not have been arrested for his abduction and then his aunt would have never read the newspaper article in San Diego about the trial. She would have returned to Spain without knowing that her nephew was alive and well in Los Angeles.

"He's going to have the shiniest coat of all our horses if you keep brushing him like that." came a familiar teasing voice behind him.

Felipe jumped slightly as he turned and saw Diego leaning against the railing with a warm smile on his face. He smiled as he waved his hands around.

Diego chuckled. "Well yes, the other horses could become jealous over the attention you are giving him." he paused as crossed over to the pinto and patted his strong neck. "I've just been speaking with father just now. I can imagine you know what it was about hmmm?"

Felipe had the good grace to look embarrassed as he signed.

Diego shook his head and smiled. "I know it wasn't your fault that father caught you coming out of the cave. I'm quite surprised that he had never caught us long before this but I'm pleased that it happened because I was about to tell him myself."

Felipe was startled by this news, he never thought that Diego would ever tell his father. He gestured towards the hacienda and made the sign for Don Alejandro.

Diego nodded. "Yes, I was going to tell him today, you see Felipe, Victoria knows too." he confirmed with a warm smile tugging on his lips.

Both Felipe's eyebrows rose in surprise and signed.

Diego grinned. "How did she know? She worked it out for herself. I always knew she was a smart woman."

Felipe grinned at how Diego's features had softened as he spoke of his love and he realised that everything must have gone really well by the way he was smiling. He quickly signed once more.

Diego chuckled. "Yes you could say that everything went well. Before long there will be another member to our family." he paused as he saw Felipe's face drop at the mention of family. "Would you like to talk about it?" he asked kindly.

Felipe shrugged as he placed the brush back on the shelf and let out a silent sigh before he signed.

Diego nodded. "How do I know that she won't take you away? She told me herself..."

Felipe interrupted with a flurry of signs.

"Yes, I do believe her. All she wants is to know you." Diego confirmed.

Felipe looked sceptical and Diego smiled softly. "I can understand why you would be a little doubtful about her motives especially what happened last time but she just wants to know you." He paused as he gazed intently at his son. "There's something else worrying you about this isn't there?" he asked.

Felipe's gaze dropped to the ground, he never could hide anything from him, not even when he was a child.

Diego touched his arm gently. "Felipe, it helps to talk about it." he said compassionately.

Felipe nodded and with haltering signs, he told his father what was concerning him.

Diego frowned slightly as he tried to understand him. "Will we change because you have an aunt?" He gave a small sigh. "Yes, things will change but at the same time, everything will remain the same. Does that make sense?"

Felipe shook his head and gave a silent sigh, he knew that he hadn't made himself clear with what he was trying to say, so he signed again, slowly, so that Diego would understand him.

Diego finally understood what was troubling the young man and he was horrified, he never realised just how deeply this was affecting Felipe. "You think that I would no longer want you because you have a real family now? You think that I would send you away? Oh Felipe, how can you think that? You are my son and nothing will ever change that. Yes, your life, our life will change because of your family, change in ways that we can't know but nothing will change between us." he placed his hands on Felipe's trembling shoulders.

"I'm so pleased that you have family, Felipe. Pleased that you have the opportunity to learn everything about them, to know where you came from." he paused as he gave him a smile. "You can even visit them anytime you like but this is your home, this is where you belong. You are my family, Felipe, you have been since the day I found you." his voice reflected his strong emotions for the younger man who he had first seen as a younger brother, then as the years passed, as a son.

Felipe felt hot tears burn his eyes at his father's heart felt words, words that he never realised he needed to hear until now. He knew that this was home, that he was loved but to hear it from Diego, was something that he longed for, something that he never knew was missing in his life. He threw his arms around him in a fierce embrace.

Diego hugged him back and silently cursed himself for his lack of understanding, he should have told Felipe long ago, that he was family. He should have realised that Felipe needed the reassurance of his place within the family, to know that he was loved and wanted. He knew that Felipe's insecurities came from his traumatic and unsettled childhood and that he needed stability in his life right now. A stability that came from a warm and loving home, a home that he has had for the last thirteen years.

He pulled back and gave his son a warm smile. "Can I go to your aunt and tell her that you want to see her?" he asked kindly.

Felipe smiled as he signed.

Diego smiled back. "Good, good. It's too late now but I'll go to the tavern tomorrow and escort her back here. Come, I think Toronado needs a good brushing down, don't you?" he asked as he led the way back inside the hacienda.

Felipe grinned and signed.

Diego chuckled and shook his head "Yes, you can brush him down and then I think I will take him for a long ride..." he paused as he saw the smirk on Felipe's face as he made the sign for Victoria and gave a playful swipe to Felipe's arm. "No, I'm not going to see Victoria, unfortunately. Besides I don't need to dress in black to see her anymore, I can go as myself." he smiled softly.

Felipe grinned as they entered the hacienda, pleased that his father would soon be marrying his lady after all this time.

A/N - many thanks for all the wonderful reviews