Ok, as promised, this one is Louis...and he has a bit of a surprise for them... ;)
Enjoy, M
Reality
Chapter 13
"Louis," CJ called out as he walked into the bedroom, "Where are you?"
"In the damn bathroom! What do you want!" he yelled back from behind the closed door.
"Man spends as much time in there as Maurice!" CJ shook his head dropping down onto the end of the bed, "You need to hurry up."
"What?" Louis called back with an aggravated air, "Speak up Caster, I can't hear you."
CJ heard the water in the sink running. He'd come into the bedroom that use to be Maurices and now was Louis's, to get him to come to dinner. Louis, unlike Maurice wasn't allowed free rein of the other 'unlocked' rooms. "HURRY UP! Dinners ready!" he called back, knowing full well that Louis could hear him, he also knew he liked to play games, head games, "If you don't get your ass in gear, Jamie's going to throw it out."
"Yeah whatever!" Louis replied, opening the door and walking out, naked, with a towel over his shoulder instead of around his waist.
"What the hell!" CJ hollered in embarrassment turning away, "What is with you two, you act like this is a nudist colony!"
Louis grinned, knowing it drove CJ crazy, and that was his main goal now, "You are such a prude! Lighten up Caster!" He went to the closet, grabbing a shirt and put it on as CJ tried to avoid seeing the mirror over the dresser where he was standing...in the same area of view CJ had turned away in. Louis laughed at him, as he walked now over to the dresser to grab his jeans, again in CJ's line of sight.
"Just get ready!" CJ said exasperated with him, jumping up from the end of the bed he walked to the window to look out. There was no snow on the ground now as an early thaw had seen to that.
"Hey, when is that meeting?" Louis asked as he glanced over in amusement but spoke seriously, "I think I'm ready for it now."
CJ snorted, "No kidding, if you know what Moe knows, you were ready two weeks ago! What's the rush, you ain't getting out of 'custody' anytime soon anyway."
Louis stopped what he was doing, looking up and giving CJ a pained look that he instantly hid he said quietly, almost to himself, "That's what you think".
CJ caught what he said, but continuing to stare out the window didn't let on as he looked down the street watching cars pass in front of the house.. Louis came to stand beside him, looking to see what was so interesting as he buttoned up his jeans, still barefooted. CJ looked down at him, speaking slowly, "Are...you...ready?" As if implying he were simple.
Louis gave him a quick look then rolled his eyes at him, a sarcastic, "YES DADDY, I'm ready!" blurted out before he turned and walked to the bedroom door still barefooted.
Following him, CJ opened the door gesturing grandly, "After you son!"
"Kiss my ass!" Louis remarked as he went out into the hallway.
"NOT IN This lifetime!" CJ cracked, following him out, hitting him lightly in the back with the pair of sneakers he'd snatched up off of the floor, "Put these on heathen, you're going to dinner, not a picnic."
"Bite me," Louis snatched them from him but held them as he went down the stairs. CJ sighed and followed him down.
XXXX
"So Jamie my love, love of my life, what's on the menu tonight!" Louis said grinning at her wickedly.
CJ popped him in the shoulder, growling low at him, "Watch it!"
Laughing and ignoring CJ, Louis sat at the table picked up his knife and fork and holding them in his fists smacked them down on their ends upon the table with a bang, "Lets go, woman, bring on the grub! A guy could starve around this damn place! Hey, I know a guy who almost did, ME!"
This was his second day without the wires and Jamie had told Kyle it was like feeding a piranha, told him in almost a joking manner that if he was at the table with him to watch his fingers. Slapping his plate down in front of him, Kyle remarked, "Grubs, that's what you should be getting with comments like that!"
"HEY," Louis exclaimed as he dug in shoveling the first mouthful in, "YOU try living on gruel, see how 'happy' you are!" Chewing carefully but happily he shoved another forkful into his mouth.
"YOU never ate gruel!" CJ laughed unable to keep his ticked off attitude for long even around Louis, "You ate anything that couldn't move!"
"Shut up!" Louis grumped loudly after he quickly swallowed, with a dark look in his direction, "Did I pull your chain!?"
Before CJ could make a retort, or Kyle, "ENOUGH!!" Jamie shouted from the other side of the table, "I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF YOUR DAMN BICKERING AT THE TABLE, NOW SHUT UP AND EAT DAMN IT!!"
The three men sat in shocked silence at her outburst, then Louis opened his mouth; and not to put food in. "Who the hell you yelling at!" he exclaimed his food forgotten, "You want to yell, go in the other room! SHIT WOMAN YOU'RE Hurting my damn ears!"
Jamie, before CJ could say or do anything jumped up and grabbing her glass of water, threw it in Louis's face. CJ and Kyle jumped up also, backing away as they got hit with the contents of the glass also too, and stood staring at each other in stunned shock. They started laughing, "About damn time!" they both exclaimed as Jamie glaring at them both turned and stomped out.
Cursing could be heard from her, as she went upstairs while Louis sat stunned, dripping with the water she'd thrown, for once his mouth shut. After a few long seconds, frowning, he glared at the two who were still laughing as they began to wipe the water off of themselves, "You think this shit is funny? It ain't funny!"
"OH YEAH, yeah it is, its damn funny!" Kyle laughed looking at him, "I've warned you, CJ's warned you, hell even Sully tried to warn you to keep that trap shut with her! Buster, you got what you deserved!"
CJ couldn't answer as he'd sat down holding his side, he'd wanted to do something like what Jamie had done several times since Louis's arrival.
Frowning again, Louis wiping his shirt and face glanced towards the door doubtfully as he commented sarcastically, "Guess I'd better go APOLOGIZE!"
"Uh, if you value you're life, you'll wait until she cools down," CJ finally was able to speak, "Remember what she did Vance in Louisiana?"
Looking quickly in his direction Louis looked puzzled, "Did to Vance, what do you mean?"
CJ stared at him a moment before smirking and asking, "You don't know everything, do you?"
"What did she do?" Louis avoided his question and continued to dry off.
"She tried to drown him," he said, watching Louis carefully, "Would have to if he wouldn't have punched her. I wouldn't keep screwing with her if I was you, you could end up in that pond out back and while its still frozen!"
Louis cut his gaze over to Kyle as if seeking the truth and Kyle answered him with, "Hey, I don't know shit about Louisiana, but if CJ says she did it, Buster, I'd stay out of her way!"
Louis returning his attention to CJ asked curiously, "Why?"
"Excuse me?" he replied with confusion, "Why what?"
"Why'd she try to drown him?" he asked becoming still as he waited for CJ to reply.
CJ's face grew solemn as he quietly replied, "Because he tried to kill Moe; and me; and then he tried to kill her."
Louis looked away from him, toward Jamie's exit route, a look of deep contemplation on his face, "Damn."
"Damn," agreed Kyle as he nodded then glanced over at CJ to see if he was catching this, Louis's expression of awe mixed with respect for what he'd been told. CJ just smiled, watching Louis's face, seeing the same thing.
XXXX
Later:
"So, you tried to drown the bastard, huh?" Louis asked standing in Jamie's open bedroom door.
She whirled around, "Excuse me?" then, "What are you doing out of your room? Where's CJ?"
He walked in the room, slowly making his way over to her, as if afraid she might bolt if he moved faster. She was looking past him, and not seeing CJ began to back away from him.
"You're scared of me?" he asked watching her eyes carefully.
"NO," she replied more bold than she felt just then, "I'm not, but you need to leave."
"So, is it true?" Louis continued towards her, speaking softly, "Did you really try to kill Vance because of me?".
"What?" she asked backing further away, "What are you talking about?"
"Is it true?" he pressed, stopping as he saw she was indeed afraid of him, "Is. it. true?"
"No," she replied finally, relaxing a bit upon seeing him back up a little.
"CJ says you did," he pressed her, "He says you tried to drown him."
She smirked, as she thought she knew what his game was, "CJ is wrong if he told you that, which I'm pretty damn sure he didn't. I did it for Moe, NOT you!"
"But I am Moe," he said softly, "And I'm Maurice, and Bosco, and Louis, I told you already, I'm all of them."
She stopped cold, then her voice coarse, "NO you aren't. You are only part of each of them, if you're even that! But you aren't MOE, not even close!"
He kept staring at her, watching her eyes, "Oh but I am," he said quietly, "And I remember you, how you feel in my arms. All soft, silky, and warm and how you smell too. Like honey and what's that perfume I bought you again? Oh yeah SamSara, I remember now; and how you taste, sweet like candy and salty like tears."
Jamie was standing in shocked silence, her heart pounding as he continued in that soft voice, sounding so much like Moe when he spoke that way to her.
"And I remember that night in your bedroom, how we fit together like we'd been made just for each other. How we couldn't get enough of one another and how we told each other secrets about what we 'like' and 'don't like' done, things I've never told anyone else, things you claimed you'd never even told Warren Sr. when you were married to him. So, I know what you like Jamie love." He took another step towards her, and embolden by her not retreating, he added softly in a husky voice, "And I remember our pillow fight in that bedroom I'm locked up in, and what we did after. I remember you," he stepped closer again, his voice deeper now, "do you remember me Jamie, do you?" he stopped looking at her his eyes smoldering with desire for her.
Jamie, her eyes filling with tears stood her ground, her voice trembling with mixed emotions, "I remember, I remember MOE, you may have his 'memories' but you are NOT him! Get out!"
Louis stood as close as he could without her running, stood eyes locked on hers, as he asked, "Are you sure you want me to do that?"
Jamie lifted her chin to him defiantly, "YES."
He nodded, "Fine, that's the way you want it, ok, that's fine," then turned and walked to the open door where he stopped to look down at the floor then looked back up with a sigh, "No," then without going through he closed the door and locked it, turning back to her he said low, "I don't think so." And started toward her.
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING!" Jamie cried out, backing away her hands held out before her as Louis came at her.
"What I should have done along time ago!" he said briskly as he stopped in front of her. He started smiling, and this time the smile reached his eyes. Jamie hesitated, unsure of his intentions now, part of her knowing she should yell for help and ready to do so at a moments notice if he so much as tried to touch her. The other part; the part seeking Moe in his face; wanting to trust him as he said quietly pointing to the bed, "Sit." Seeing the uncertainty in her face he closed his eyes, then opened them with a sigh, barking out, "For god's sake Jamie, sit!"
"You need to leave," she replied strongly, "I'm not joking Louis! I will call for help if you don't!"
He grinned at her, "Go ahead, call them, I won't stop you!" He backed away from her a bit, holding his hands out from his sides, "Call them."
She swallowed hard, watching his eyes as he grinned at her.
"What? Not going to call CJ for help?" he asked sure of himself now, "Get him to make the Big Bad go away?"
Her face reddened, "Don't tempt me, Louis!" she responded angrily.
"Man I love it when you're mad!" he laughed quietly, "Makes your eyes go all dark, of course, I like it when they go all hazel green too, like when we're...!"
"Stop it!" she exclaimed, her face flaming, "Stop pretending to be MOE!"
"Who's pretending?" then he moved in close to her, "Look at me," he reached out, gently lifting her chin to look into her eyes, "Look at me, tell me who you see?" She closed her eyes, the nearness of him making it hard to think. "Jamie, please," he whispered to her, "just tell me who you see?"
"Don't," she cried out, "please, it's not fair!" Then she felt his lips on hers and hot tears came to her eyes, flowing down her cheeks, as he pressed his body tightly against hers, his arms going around her, holding her close as he sought entry to her mouth. Jamie resisted him at first then feeling his heart pounding against hers, her heart matching his rhythm, she gave way to her need for him, for Moe, to be close to him, have him close to her.
After a few minutes, he lifted his head to gaze down into her face, his right hand coming up to caress her cheek as he smiled gently down at her, "Jamie..." he said huskily.
Before she could respond he suddenly backed away from her, confusion etched tightly on his face.
Jamie stood there, partly in shock at what had occurred and at her own participation, partly in shock at her desire to pull him back to her. But, she didn't stop him as he suddenly turned away to move quickly to the door. Louis unlocked it and opened it to find CJ standing just outside, about to knock.
"What the hell?" CJ exclaimed, then seeing the 'guilty' shocked look on Louis's face, and looking past him to see Jamie's face, tear stained and red with embarrassment he went crazy on Louis.
"YOU SON-OF-A-BITCH!!" he yelled as he grabbed him, Louis unresisting from the room, to throw him against the opposite wall of the hallway. Louis hit the wall, then righting himself put his hands out in front of him to prevent CJ from getting near him, a look of fear on his face as CJ advanced on him. His hands raised to grab him again stopped in mid grab as Jamie rushed out of the room, yelling for CJ, "STOP!! CJ STOP!! DON'T!! HE didn't DO anything! HE just wanted to talk to me!"
CJ hesitated, seeing the look on Louis's face as he turned to Jamie; one of gratitude, but also...there was something more, he almost looked like he was unsure of what was going on, confused even. "How did you get out?" he asked, still ready for Louis to try something.
Staring at Jamie, Louis turned his eyes and glanced at CJ, "Picked the damn lock, how do you think!?" Now his face was back to hard as he looked back over at her, then grinning said, "Next time..." and winked obnoxiously as CJ saw it.
CJ stepped between them, not looking to see Jamie's reaction, he would have been shocked to see the slight red-faced grin she quickly hid as he told Louis roughly, "Go back to your room now! Oh and Louis...we'll take care of that lock problem you seem to have, don't worry about that!"
Louis gave him a smirk, "You can try anyway huh!" Then turned, walking back to his room, he entered and slammed the door behind him.
CJ sighed as he passed his hand over the back of his hair, then turning to Jamie, "Are you okay?"
Nodding, "Yeah, I'm fine, he really didn't do anything..." she seemed distracted, and a little red-faced, but otherwise fine.
"Okay," CJ accepted her answer, not pushing, "I came to tell you that Kyle wants to go over the plan for your part in the meeting in a while, but if you want to do it later..."
"No, no, I'm fine, really," she smiled, "give me just a minute, okay, I'll be right down."
"Sure, no hurry," he watched her face, "Jamie? What did he want to talk about?"
She blushed, then, "Don't know, he changed his mind and was leaving when you came to the door. Must have not been important after all." Then turning she went back into her room, leaving him standing there looking back and forth between the bedroom doors.
XXXX
"Well, what do you think?" Kyle asked her as if he were completely dependent on her liking the plan.
"I think that if this works, and it should, I 'think' we should get Emmy's!" she laughed as she leaned back in the chair. "Do you really think he's going to believe that both 'Moe' and CJ decided to do this? I mean, he's not stupid is he?" she was now quite serious, it was a question they'd been worrying about for some time now.
"I hope so," Kyle replied rubbing his temple, "If he doesn't, they're dead men. The big question is, do you think we can trust Louis?" he asked her.
Jamie sat a moment, then, "Honestly? I'm not sure, and that's what should worry all of us. One minute he's Smartass central, the next he pissed off about something, and the very next he's trying to please us. I really think he's unstable Kyle, somewhere between 'Maurice' and 'Moe'." She didn't tell him about the incident earlier.
"Do you think Dr. Jedson's made progress with him?" he was stacking lose papers into a pile before putting them away in their folders.
Shrugging now, she replied, "I don't know, Doc thinks he has, but then Louis seems to hide more than he reveals."
"Jamie," Kyle looked up from his stacking, "This meetings in a few days, if you don't think he can hold it together..." he left the sentence unfinished as Louis himself came into the room.
"Hey look, stopped you in mid-sentence, if a guy was paranoid, and I'm not, he might think you were talking about me again!" he smirked at Kyle, ignoring Jamie completely.
"Maybe paranoid wouldn't be such a bad thing!" CJ said moving to sit down at the table, "Keep you out of trouble." Louis cut his eyes at him and made a face, but remained silent as he took a seat.
Kyle looked first at one, then the other, "Did I miss something again?" He was the one starting to feel paranoid suddenly.
"Nope," Louis grinned over at CJ daring him to 'try it'.
"Not that I know of," CJ countered glaring at Louis as if to tell him, 'don't tempt me to kick your ass'.
Now Kyle knew something had indeed happened, again, but decided to not ask, as he really didn't want to know.
"Well?" Louis asked turning to him, "Decided if I'm trustworthy yet? Or if I'm sane enough, yet?"
Kyle snorted slightly letting the 'looks' between the two men go for now as he shook his head, "No. To both questions." He closed the last folder, placing it into his briefcase, "But we don't really have a choice, if you don't show up, he'll be suspicious, and the operation will be blown, this guy IS paranoid, that's why it's taken so long to get close to him. If you screw this up, we could all be dead." Louis stared at him, then glanced at Jamie as if in question before he looked back at Kyle. Kyle seeing the look he gave her, remarked, "Yes, Jamie too."
Cutting his eyes back again at Jamie, then again back to Kyle, Louis gave a quick nod, "Don't worry, I'm ready. I might not be who you want, but I hate drug dealers as much as Moe, and besides, there is no choice now is there?"
XXXX
Later that night:
Louis was almost asleep when he heard a soft knock at his door, frowning because no one came to his door this late he got up, calling out, "What now?" And heard no answer to his call, reaching the door he commented wryly, "Hey, you have the key remember!? Padlocked me in now! Not like I can open it from in here!" As he waited curiously he heard a key moving in the door, the lock releasing then a soft knock again. "What the hell..." he scowled as he stood waiting, then when no one came through reached out and opened the door. "I don't know what you're doing Caster, but..." he started, then stopped as he saw Jamie standing there. He arched his eyebrows at her, but didn't say anything.
She gave a half smile, then asked quietly, "Why did you do what you did earlier? Why did you ask me to tell you who I saw?"
He remained still, watching her, swallowing hard, but not answering her. Staring at him a short while, she nodded when she saw he wasn't going to speak then, "Okay, okay, fine," and started to pull the door closed.
Reaching out, Louis put his hand on her arm, stopping her. He had a look of mixed emotions on his face, as he asked, "Who...who did you see?"
Taking her hand from the doorknob, she pulled her arm back slowly, his hand sliding down grasping her hand lightly. Jamie let him grip it, but didn't grip back instead standing nervously she said, "I don't know, I honestly don't know."
He gave a sad smile, "Yes you do, you're just afraid, afraid to admit what you saw. Remember when you said you loved all of me? Every part of me? Back in that hall in when we were leaving the therapy room for my leg?"
Tilting her head in surprise at him, "You remember that? No, Moe remembers that, you just 'peeked'."
"No," he said sadly, "I didn't peek, I remember. I am Moe, Jamie, just like I'm Maurice, and Bosco, and I'm Louis, I am all of them. But I guess you can't accept that. I tried to tell you that before, but you didn't let me. I know I'm not 'whole' not like I was before, but I'm still the man who loves you, the man you love, I'm just different at the same time. That's who I wanted you to say you saw. That's all I want you to see. But I can't force that, and I don't want to, not if you don't want it. There is too much at stake. I am Moe, and I'm Louis at the same time. I'm not soft and all nice and sweet like Moe was, or a handful of angry kid like Maurice, I'm me, loud and obnoxious, and all that Moe was and even some of Maurice and crazy in love with you, and that's the best explanation I can give you. I've changed, even if I was only Moe, I wouldn't be the same as before. That's what you can't accept." He slowly lifted her hand to his mouth, kissing each of her fingers, then let go to reach out as he gently moved her back into the hall. Stepping back inside Louis closed the door and returned to his bed, leaving her standing in the hall in tears.
Louis climbed in and rolling over buried his face in his pillow, knowing he wouldn't sleep again tonight, knowing he'd lost her; he'd seen the look on her face as she realized the truth in what he was telling her. Her look of loss and heartbreak, echoing what he now felt, he then heard the key in the lock as she replaced the padlock, and her footsteps as she went to her room next to his, then when he was sure she was not coming back, he broke down in tears, giving way to his own loss and grief he used the pillow to muffle the sounds he didn't want her to hear through the wall.
And knew he had to get this over with and get the hell away from here, soon before he went crazy with being near her.
TBC...