Heres the next chapter, hope you enjoy.
I went right through the forest, whipping through the trees and following Edward's sent.
I wasn't sure what I was going to say yet. No way in hell am I going to think it through first. I want to see how he's gonna act toward me.
I was very close to catching up with him. I knew he was fast but I got fast over the years too.
His footsteps were close, they were crunching on the sticks and leaves in my ears. Then I saw him running past some trees and I pushed off the forest floor harder. I threw my hands out and tackled him to the ground.
We rolled over and I threw his body off me and into a tree. With the force of my throw the tree snapped and he tumbled into a boulder.
I jumped to me feet the same time as he did. He looked so pist.
"What the hell was that for?!" He yelled at me.
"I knew you wouldn't stop if I yelled." I said angrily.
"That doesn't give you the right to tackle me!"
I sighed. "Gosh. Calm down."
"How am I suppose to calm down when the person I want to spend my existence with is married to someone else?!"
I narrowed my eyes. "Oh and if the person you used to love tell you that they weren't good enough and that they were sick of you how would that feel, huh?"
He flinched at that, but tried to calm his expression.
"But Bella, I truly do love you. Please, give me another chance." He was begging, his eyes sorrowful and worried.
"No! Where would you ever come up with something like that?! I've found someone who can take care of me and help me! Because of him I got better! Because of him I can live with myself without feeling agony and pain all the time!"
"But what am I suppose to do? I love you with everything I have. I would give everything up just to have another chance." His voice was strangled and he looked like he could cry.
My heart started to shake, I felt bad for what I was doing to him but I couldn't stop and break all that has happened for me.
"Listen to me. I can't do that. I've picked myself up and scrubbed off all the dirt. I was in pain and I was angry- You left! How could you except me to just let that go?! I can't derail everything I have built and made for myself for something that I can't trust will happen!"
"Bella, please. I love you and I never could leave you again and put us both through that, you have to believe me. I can't stand this! I love you so much and to hear you say that you don't is agony on me, but I know your lying. After a love like ours I know that it would be impossible to ever break."
After time had passed I didn't realize that he had walked closer toward me. Before I could even comprehend what he was about to do his lips were on mine.
It was a mix of shock and care that made me not pull my lips from his.
For some un-Godly reason I didn't pull away. I got terrified when my lips moved a fraction. But the worst thing was that something inside me felt like this was right.
I yanked my lips away and threw the hardest punch I've ever throw at Edward's jaw. There was no doubt that his jaw actually hurt. He whipped to the ground and grabbed his jaw but kept his eyes on me.
"Stay away from me. How dare you touch me like that. I've been through the worst pain I have every felt because of you, it beats the pain of the venom that spread through my veins and changed me.
"I have a family that would do anything for me and I would do anything for them. I have a man who cares for me and loves me and a guarantee that he wont leave. There is nothing you can say that will ever take me away from that. I refuse to let you hurt me again. Don't you ever, ever come near me anymore." I looked him dead in the eye, my voice was so strong, like a whip threw the air, but I could hear the shatter that ran through.
I turned away and ran as fast as I could to my house. I opened the door and ran up to my and Nick's room, slammed the door and threw myself on the bed. I sat up and leaned against the headboard and pulled my legs to my chest.
The sobs that ran threw my body hurt so much, I was shaking and trying to keep myself from screaming.
NO! I can't let this happen to me! I can't let him hold something inside me again!
I heard the front door open and fast feet moving up the stairs, the door swung open and closed quickly. I didn't look up even though I knew who it was.
I just felt his arms pull me close to his chest and I threw my arms around his neck.
"I can't do this again. I really really can't. " I sobbed over his shoulder.
He rocked me back and forth as the sobs rolled all over me. "We shouldn't have gone there. I shouldn't have followed after him. Why am I so stupid?"
"Your not. Your the smartest person I've ever met." Nick said strongly, with love.
I shouldn't have let him keep his lips on mine or so long. I felt disgusted with myself. I'm extremely happily married, and I kissed another man. The man who ripped out and shattered my heart.
"I really am. I- I let him-" I kept sobbing, barely even able to let the words loose from my lips. But I needed to tell Nick, I had to.
Nick smoothed my hair back, trying to calm me down so he could hear what I was saying. I tried pulling deeper breaths in and holding my sobs.
"I'm sorry Nick, I'm so sorry. I let him kiss me."
I felt him stiffen a little bit and his hands fisted behind my back. I knew Nick seemed extremely calm and like he couldn't hurt a fly, but when it comes to me, he might just rip someones throat out.
I just kept sobbing as he held me tightly. I knew I would hurt him terribly if I said that I felt a spark of something from the kiss, and that was the last thing I ever wanted to do.
I heard him take deep breaths, trying to control his anger. "I'm so sorry." I sobbed again, pulling Nick closer to me.
I held onto Nick as hard as I could. I knew he was still mad, not at me but at Edward. I knew the next time we saw him Nick was gonna do something, I don't know what though. Right now I'm more worried about my and Nick's feelings.
I didn't want to hurt Nick or put him in any pain. I know how much he cares for me and would do anything for me. I've never seem him in pain before, angry, yes but never in any pain.
He pulled me closer too, like he was looking for comfort and love from me. He understood my feelings for Edward almost better than I did, maybe even better. It was like he was a filing system, he knew where everything was and needed to be placed.I never thought I would hurt him like this, I guess because I figured I lost all my love for Edward... apparently I was wrong.
I sobbed again after thinking that.
I knew Nick was gonna have to pull us under soon, so I wasn't surprised when we were, but I was surprised to seen gray smoke for a second before everything turned into a rainbow of color while we sat on a comfortable bed like stone on top a cliff.
We both layed back after awhile. We both were in pain right then. Nick stroked my hair while I rubbed patterns on his arm.
My heart was patched but still frayed. Nick fixed it as best as he could, I was actually whole for all those years. But there were still those tiny holes that I couldn't see, and were to small to seal. And when Edward kissed me he stretched out all those tiny holes.
I felt so much pain and terror. I didn't want to love him anymore. I wanted to get over him and stop caring. I wanted my life back, when I could hate and throw away all my pain like it never existed. I wanted it all to go back to the way it was.
Nick and I held onto each other and closed our eyes and drifted into better times and hoped everything would be better tomorrow.
Hope you enjoyed, sorry it took so long to update and Merry and Happy everything just to let you all know 'Essy' didn't say anything to Edward about him calling her 'Bella' because she had other stuff on her mind obviously my poll is up and I think it will be closed by the next update and I think this story is almost over maybe four or five more chapter to go possibly less if I put allot of words in, more to come