A/N: Loving all the reviews. They keep me going on this when I really should be doing other stuff. But I can't let you down!

Kate lay on her bed, drifting in and out of sleep. She'd spent hours on the letter. Once she'd decided on a method of communication, it had taken several fits and starts to perfect it and then hours more of getting it just right. In the end, she wasn't sure it was going to work, but her options were very, very limited. She had no doubt that if Rick and the boys could see what she'd done that they'd figure out the message. The question was if they'd see it. Her captor had come for the letter not long after she'd finally produced a version that she was happy with. There had been multiple versions that didn't make the snuff. She'd had to rip them into tiny shreds and stash them in the bathroom, planning to flush pieces a little at a time. She couldn't very well put them in the trash for her captor to find when she emptied the cell.

Prior to the demand that she write this letter, Kate had spent much of her copious free time trying to figure out who the hell had taken her. She hadn't gotten far, but then it dawned on her that it didn't really matter in the end. What she did know was valuable information and it might just be enough for Castle and the boys to figure out where she was. She'd had to take the chance. She prayed that the fact that her captor had taken the letter and not said anything further was proof that she hadn't noticed the alterations. They were very subtle.

Now she was back in the bed, trying to sleep after the arduous task of producing the letter. Her favorite thing to do when she wasn't eating or reading or exercising (that was really the extent of her activities) was to have imaginary conversations with Castle in her head. They discussed all kinds of things in her head. Their relationship, their engagement, where they wanted to marry, if they wanted kids. She tried to make Fastle (Fake Castle) answer questions as much like the original as possible, but since she didn't really know his opinion on many of these matters it was difficult to do. What Fastle did provide was the opportunity for her to practice having these conversations. She was the reserved one, the one who withdrew from the big talks. She knew Rick hesitated on his end only because he thought it would push her away. She was determined once she returned from this Land of the Lost that she would be a more open partner in their relationship. In the meantime she had Fastle to argue with, talk about the book she was reading (she'd found some old classics and one book by Castle in the nightstand, all well used paperbacks), to motivate her to get out of bed and keep her ass in shape. She felt a bit like Tom Hanks talking to Wilson, though she hadn't resorted to using any inanimate objects as conversational partners…yet. Castle's presence in her life was so complete; she just had to close her eyes to see him in front of her. And though all her conversations were with Fastle, it did keep her from losing herself into the despair the situation called for. She had to get back to him and having a breakdown was not going to lead to anything productive.

Jim was up before everyone in the loft. Not that this was a big accomplishment. Castle and Martha had never been known as early risers and now with the stress of Kate missing, Castle was even less likely to be up early. Jim had always been an early riser, just as Kate was. She would often join him out on the dock at the lake to watch the sunrise together while Jo slept in. Those memories were from before of course. Once Jo was lost, Jim had also lost any claim to his daughter spending early morning free time with him. They were uncomfortable around each other, even when he'd regained his sobriety. He had hurt her tremendously when he couldn't be there for her and he hadn't been sure that earlier, happier version of Kate was ever going to reappear.

Not sure that is until he started hearing about this Castle fellow. Kate had always played it close to the vest with her relationships with men. At first she'd seemed very annoyed with the writer, but soon Jim started noticing that while she verbalized her annoyance of the man, her eyes sparkled with a light that hadn't been there since her 19th year and she was smiling and laughing more, even with her father. Jim wasn't aware of all the issues that went on with Kate and Rick, but once they finally became a couple it was obvious that they were crazy for each other. Kate was a better person with Rick in her life, there was no question.

When she had come to him about the job with the AG, he'd been surprised that she was considering it. He didn't think she'd really thought about all the ramifications of such a job. Whatever his reservations, he'd tried to be a sounding board for her. He hadn't been good for much during those initial years without Jo, but he was determined to be there for his only child no matter what she decided.

Lost in thoughts of his missing daughter, he'd wandered downstairs to the kitchen thinking about getting some coffee made in the fancy machine that Castle owned. Jim was very grateful to Martha and Rick opening their home to him. He knew Katie had essentially moved into the loft and his observant eyes had picked out several items that must have belonged to his daughter. He knew she was very comfortable here in this space; considered it her home at this point. Jim felt a little closer to her just being in the place where she spent so much of her life now. A life that was full of the Castle family, a life he was now trying to share despite Kate not being here. It helped ease the burden of pain he carried; he had others to share it with and he had to help Martha keep Castle together.

Looking at the microwave clock, he saw it was almost 8am. Lanie would be here with Alexis within thirty minutes if all had gone well at the airport. He decided he'd start some breakfast for everyone. He'd never been much of a cook before Jo had died, and he still wasn't great at many things but breakfast in this incredibly well-stocked kitchen he could handle.

Fifteen minutes later, there were delicious smells coming from the kitchen. Jim had turned on the morning news in the living room; he was a bit of a news junkie and it kept him company while he worked alone on breakfast. To his surprise, he heard Martha making her way down the stairs. He'd thought it was too early for her to be up.

"Jim, darling, you don't have to go to all this trouble"

"It's no trouble Martha. I wanted to have a good breakfast for everyone once Lanie and Alexis get here."

"Yes, well Alexis texted me about an hour ago. She got here fine and was going through customs."

"Oh, good. Well I hope they're on time; this is almost ready and there's way too much for the two of us."

As his words trailed off, they both turned at a noise coming from Castle's office. It turned out to be Castle himself, in a robe, boxers and t-shirt. His hair was sticking up every which way and he was rubbing sleep out of his eye with his right hand.

"Morning" he spoke, with a bit of a croak. "What's that wonderful smell? It can't be mother's cooking, or else I really have lost my mind."

"Ha ha darling. Jim is getting breakfast ready for when Lanie and Alexis arrive." Secretly she was thrilled to hear him making jokes at her expense. He had to be feeling a bit better if he could try and laugh at things involving his mother.

Jim poured Castle a mug of the coffee he'd managed to produce out of the machine. Rick grabbed it eagerly, clearly savoring the taste of the coffee, lost in a private moment that probably involved Jim's daughter. He decided to not think any further on that angle and turned back to minding the bacon sizzling on the griddle.

As Castle felt the coffee hitting his tired, worn out body and slowly reinvigorating his entire being, he heard the sound of two women laughing from the outer hallway, outside the loft. He set his coffee down knowing who it would be and started towards the door to greet his daughter back from Costa Rica. Even with all that had happened, he couldn't wait to see her.

As he crossed the floor and approached the foyer he suddenly stopped in his tracks. His senses seemed to splinter away from him at this point. The part of him that could still hear things knew the sound of Alexis' key being inserted into the lock as she and Lanie prepared to enter the apartment. It also heard Martha asking him if everything was alright; she hadn't heard the subtle sounds signaling someone was about to come in. He was so attuned to it after listening for Kate coming home over the last year.

His sense of sight was completely arrested by an envelope lying on the floor of his foyer. It had been just last week that she'd disappeared and he'd found the first envelope lying in this exact spot. His sense of smell and taste were still taken up with the odors coming from the kitchen. However, as his sympathetic nervous system kicked in and his body was filled with adrenaline released by the sight of this envelope (knowing what this envelope might contain), his olfactory senses picked up an unmistakable scent released from his own body: fear.

He stood frozen, paralyzed; in the few seconds it took for Alexis to unlock the door a lifetime seemed to pass by him. He did not want to pick up this envelope. He was dying to pick up this envelope. He was terrified of what he might find in it. He was desperate to find what it said, how it might lead to Kate. Forgotten in the rush of emotions was the excitement of seeing his daughter.

Martha had moved to his side by now and had also caught sight of the object of his attention. It was a sight that arrested her as well, knowing what it might represent. And it was a sight that was suddenly lost as the door swung open and revealed Alexis rushing into the house, Lanie just behind. They both trod unwittingly over the envelope.

Alexis saw her father and Grams standing just beyond the foyer, facing her. She dropped her suitcase and ran towards them, enveloping them both in a hug. She was so relieved to be home. "Dad, Grams! I'm so happy to be back home with you!" As she finished her greeting she found she was the only one involved in the hug. Both her father and Grams seemed a bit shocked, neither really responding to her. As her face started to fall, confused as to why they weren't acting happy to have her back, she noticed they were both staring in the foyer where Lanie was taking off her coat. "Dad? Grams? What's wrong?" Lanie looked fine to her.

Lanie turned back from hanging up her coat and saw all three Castle/Rogers staring towards her. She was a bit startled; Alexis should have been the object of all their attention, but they seemed to be staring at her instead. Both Martha and Castle had strange looks on their faces; fear, excitement and something even rawer from Castle. Need? Lust? She wasn't sure what it was, but why was he looking at her? Why weren't they all fussing over Alexis?

"Richard Castle, you'd better not be checking out the girls" she tried to inject some humor into an increasingly uncomfortable situation. Did she have a huge stain on her shirt that Alexis had been too polite to mention? Trying to check her outfit out she looked down and suddenly saw what Castle and Martha had been shaken by. There was another envelope.

Alexis finally figured it all out when Lanie started staring at the ground too. Another envelope, probably just like he had found earlier. No wonder he was lost in his own head. This letter was probably going to change all their lives once again. Whatever it contained, it was either going to help them find Kate and get her father back to himself or it was going to destroy him. She was so glad to be there before he read it; she would do anything to help him. But she couldn't help but curse a bit under her breath at the lousy timing as it completely derailed her homecoming.

Lanie snapped back to reality first. Reaching back into her jacket pockets now hanging beside her, she fished out some gloves. She was like a boy scout, always prepared. Donning them, she bent down and picked up the envelope. It was addressed to R.C., just like the first. She moved to the dining room, everyone following her as if in slow motion. The envelope was very light. No jewelry being returned tonight.

"Castle, I'm going to open this. I've got gloves on and you don't have any."

Castle nodded dumbly. He still couldn't believe this was happening again. He watched as Lanie slid a knife through the edge of the envelope. A single piece of paper slid out. Lanie unfolded it and started to read; tears came unbidden to her eyes and when she looked up at Castle she had a pleading look in her eye.

"It's her again Castle. Remember, she's not trying to hurt you, she's trying to help you find her."

"I know Lanie." He almost sounded normal there. He hoped no one else had noticed the tremulous voice or the shaking hands. He shoved his left hand quickly into the robe's pocket. There may or may not have been a certain silky pair of Beckett's…oh, never mind. "Read it out loud. For everyone" he ordered.

Lanie sighed and looked down again.

Richard,

I know you have figured out by now I'm not in Washington. I decided I needed a clean break from everyone. No one in my life has ever really been there for me. I've had to be the strong one, carrying the weight of the rest. I'm sick of it. I'm gone from your lives for good, so don't come looking for me. A clean break is best. I'm taking nothing from this life save the first paperback version of A Calm Before the Storm. It will serve to remind me of you and our friendship. I hope you're doing well in your life as you go out and find your true love. She's waiting out there, closer than you think, and I wish you both the greatest happiness in your lives. I'm using the lemons I've been dealt in life to help me move on to a truly wonderful new start. Goodbye Richard, you'll never see me again. Do not mourn what little we had together. Don't waste your time, true love is likely around the corner and ready for you. Embrace the opportunity.

Always,

Katherine

Even knowing that she didn't really mean the words written there, both Jim and Castle couldn't help but feel much wounded by this latest statement. There was a long pause until Alexis finally chirped "What part is the message?"

Castle didn't have the heart to tell her that this time there was no real hidden message that was obvious to him. There simply wasn't enough written to even make much of a message. His hope that this time she would have figured out a way to tell him where she was imploded into dust. She was lost to him. He couldn't breathe without her, couldn't maintain a sinus rhythm for his heart. Nothing really mattered anymore. He couldn't break down in front of Alexis though, so he somehow made some lame excuse that everyone seemed to see right through and made his way back to the cocoon of his bedroom where he could close his eyes and see her, smell her. God, he longed to touch her again. Just once was all he needed. Just once.