A SERIES OF HILARIOUS EVENTS
By: CARDCAPTOR FANATIC
Disclaimer: No I do not own card captor sakura in any way !
Full Summary: Okay so Sakura Kinomoto and Syoaran Li have been enemies ever since they set eyes on each other! Why you may ask well let's just say that Li has always had a knack for pissing Sakura off and enjoying every second of it! ( Lol ). But what is unknown to all is that Li has a history of a series of hilarious yet unfortunate events in his life. What will happen when Sakura finally comes up with a master plan to get revenge on Li? Can this be linked with his past? Oh yeah and Tomoyo and Eriol play a very interesting role in this fanfic tooo!
OKAY! WOW! Thank you for all of the great reviews guys! I love you guys to bits! Lol! Just the fact that you guys enjoy my fic makes me soo happy! You guys totally rock! Lol! Enjoy!
Hey guys I noticed that there were a lot of grammer mistakes in the last chappie! lol! I didn't actually get a chance to reread it so i'm sorry for any probs with that! But I have gone back and fixed all of the grammer mistakes! Lol thanks! cardcaptor fanatic out! Ps: sorry for any grammer mistakes in this chappie! bye!
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"Okay seeya Saku yeah byeeeeee" the girls all chanted before running off.
I was about to leave too but then I noticed the guys were following me.
"ummm why are you guys following me?" I asked cautiously.
"We're coming over to your house silly" stated Hiro as if it was the most simple thing in the world and then giggled like a girl.
"ughhh right let me rephrase that why are you coming to my house when the sleepover is not until 5? Which is two hours from now in case your too thick to comprehend english!" I stated while holding up 2 fingers.
"Oh didn't you know Sakura?" questioned Yamazaki.
"Know what?" I sneered getting irritated.
"Haven't you wondered who your new neighbour is?" asked Syaoran.
"You mean that mansion?" I asked perplexed 'what does Syaoran have to do with my new neighbours unless...'
"Yup well I'm your new neighbour!" Syaoran chirped as he swooped down and kissed me on the cheek faster then you can say 'Norway' and sprinted off to his new mansion with his buddies yelling "see you at five Saku!" before I could even comprehend what had happened.
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4:00 pm Sakura's POV
"There we go finally done with dinner phew" I said more to myself then any one else as I placed the wonderfully famous Kinomoto pasta and strawberry fudge cake in the fridge. Okay you guys may not know this but before my mother died dad didn't work in an office. He was actually a pretty good cook. Okay well that's an understatement. He was the best cook ever. Well let's just say that we Kinomotos are very well known for our pasta and pastry dishes. I being one myself am a great cook not to brag or anything of course.
"Hey Sakura I'm leaving" called out Touya as he sat on the sofa putting his shoes on.
"Okay bye" I called out from the kitchen.
"Hey Kajuu are you sure this little sleepover of yours is only your friends?" asked Touya suspiciouly for what seemed like the hundreth time.
"Yesss Touya and that is why you will not come back from Yukito's house until Monday after school" I said as I walked out of the kitchen staring at him real hard as I said this to him.
"Oh come on lemme come and visit tomorrow just to check up on my favorite sister in the whole wide world!" he said in a baby tone.
"Touya I'm your only sister and NO! Now leave!" I said as I started pushing him out the door.
"Fine Bye!" he said as he left.
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK
'I wonder who that can be' I thought as I headed to the door.
"Sakura I've decided I'm staying" Touya said as he walked in.
"WHAT? I mean no you can't! I mean you can't let me ruin your weekend just beacuse dad's not home...and besides I'm going to be with my friends...What can possibly go wrong?" I asked as I tried to reassure him that he should leave.
"Yeah yeah I no you and your friends wanna have a girls only weekend " he said still thinking it over.
"Yes and you know I'm responsible enough to stay home with my friends for two days Touya chill out for Kami's sake" I said getting irritated.
"Responsible?" he snorted and started laughing his head off. "YOU. Responsible? ahahahahhah I never thought I'd hear those two words in the same sentence aahahaahha"
"What the hell do you mean? I am responsible!" I stated through gritted teeh.
"Yeah tell that to are old neighbours" said Touya as he burst into laughter again.
"yeahh about that..." I said sheepishly as I thought back to why our old neighbours decided to move out in the first place.
FLASHBACK LAST DAY OF SUMMER HOLIDAYS NORMAL POV
"I am not a girl not yet a woman!" rung Touya's cell phone as I gave him a wierd look.
"What?" he said innocently as he answered his phone. "oh hello...yes...right...I won't be able to but I know someone who could...uh hun...sure...ok thanks bubye.."
"Sakuraaaaaaa" purred Touya as he turned to face his angelic like sister whom was in the middle of stuffing her mouth with her favorite cake in the whole wide world "Strawberry Fudge!" ...uhhh anyways back to the story.
Sakura's POV
"No don't even think about it!" I said as I gave him a quick glance.
"awwww come on...Saku...you only have to babysit their kids for 2 hours" he said as he flashed me my own trade mark puppy dog eyes.
"NOooooooooo those kids are evil! Evil I tell you!" I screeched looking out alarmingly as to make sure they weren't listening.
"You're just over reacting Kajuu I'm sure Akio didn't mean to light your hair on fire" he said trailing off.
"Oh wouldn't you like to know.." I stated remembering the last time I babysat my neighbour's twins from hell. Akio and Yukio two 5 year olds.
"Well then you force me to this..." he said as he made his way ever closer to my precious cake.
"Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo" (Think slow motion) I yelled as Touya grabbed my cake. "Don't you dare!...You wouldn't!" I said as he stepped closer to the trash with my cake drooping closer...closer...and closer!
"Oh I would" he said and began to tip over my cake.
"ALRIGHT FINE! ILL DO IT! ILL DO IT! JUST LEAVE RIKA OUT OF THIS!"
"Rika? aahahhahahahaahaaha" laughed Touya as he passed me my cake and walked out of the kitchen.
30 MINUTES LATER
Ding Dong!
'How on Earth did I land myself in this situation? again? Evil Evil Touya! GRRRRRRRRR! Well at least I got my cake mmmmmm.' Yes we all know Sakura loves cake! Infact the day she was born she ate cake. Her first word was cake. She wrote and had a book published titled "Why Everyone Should Eat Only Cake" by the age of two. She was the cake in the the school vegetable production even though a "cake" is not a vegetable (yes the sensei had nightmares for weeks). Every year on Halloween she gives out jelly cakes and strawberries. In fourth grade when the sensei asked her what she wanted to be when she grew up the answer was "A CAKE!". She cried for weeks when she realized she couldn't be a cake when she grew up and ended up eating more cake because she went into depression. In fifth grade when Syaoran Li ate her Strawberry fudge cake she went balistic and glued him to her backpack dragging him every where. Yes it's true! No one comes in between Saku and her cake! She lives for cake and will do anythink for it! In conclusion she is a cake maniac who's worst nightmare is a world with out cake and whos life ambition is to travel the world and eat every type of cake ever created by man kind! Her second life ambition is to eat all of her friends. You see she names her cakes so she can say I've eaten a stewy, or a Tomoyo. Yes she names her cakes after her friends...and enemies. Sad really. She ate Tomoyo when she was 3. She's eaten 2785 Tomoyos in her life time so far. (Tomoyo is a blueberry cake lol). Yes Hiro is not the only one with issues. sweat drops Oh great I'm blabbering again my bad lol back to the fic!
The door opened cascading a dark shadow upon me. "who's there?" shrieked a high pitched woman's voice.
"OMG! IT'S A GHOST! AHHHHHHHH!" I yelled as I turned around to run off but someone grabbed me by the collar and dragged me into the house. "NOOOOOO" I shrieked.
"ahahahahahahahahahahhhahahahahhahahahahahahahaahah" I heard laughing so I looked up from under my arms and saw the twins dressed up in there mother's coat Akio standing on Yukio's shoulders.
"grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! You scared the hell out of me! Gosh!" I said to them as they continued to laugh their heads off staring at me as I got up.
"Mom and Dad had to go to a party they left this note for you" stated Yukio as he handed me a slip of paper. It read:
Sorry for the short notice Sakura chan! It was all last minute. Please take good care of the twins and we'll pay you 20 dollars when we get back at 8 pm. Thanks again and in case of emergerncy you can call this number : (911) bye!
'greaaaaaaaaaaaaat' I thought sarcastically as I put the note in the trash and went to the living room to watch t.v with the twins.
"Sakura chaaaaaaaaaan" purred one of the twins...I'm not sure which ones which really they look too much alike not to mention they are dressed the same. But I could tell because akio had a dimple on his chin and Yukio didn't.
"yes?" I asked afraid of what was to come.
"It's time for my snack" Yukio said.
"No it's not it's time for Akio's snack" I said monotonely.
"I am Akio" he said giving me an innocent look.
"Oh yeah you are phew good thing too because your mother told me Yukio gets hyper when he eats snacks."
'Yup" he said as I returned form the kitchen and handed him a chocolate bar.
"Sakura chaaaaaaaaaaan" Yukio purred.
"Yes ?"
"It's time for my snack"
"..."
"Sakura chan?"
"Since when do you both have dimples on your chins?" I asked freaked out.
"Since always" replied the twin whom I thought was Akio in a matter of fact voice.
"oh my oh my oh my oh my oh my oh my.."
Normal POV
"What do you think is wrong with her?"
"I don't know maybe we should help her cool off'"
"Let's go!" the two twins left giving Sakura whom still seemed to be tooo indulged in her self to notice the twins leave and return with mischievious smirks.
Sakura's POV
"If he's Akio and he's Yukio then Yukio must have been Akio before and Akio must have been the dimple one...ugh unless they both have dimples then that would make me Yukio and Akio Yukio too unless I was Akio and Yukio was Akio...Which brings us back to Yukio and the dimple man with faeries.."
"BOO!"
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I shrieked as a bucket of freezing cold water was thrown on me. "Oh no you didn't!
"Oh I think we did!" yelled back the twins as they sprinted away from Sakura faster then a swerving eagle as a rampaging outraged Sakura chased after them.
20 MINUTES LATER
"MUHAHAHAHHAHAAAHHAHAHAHAHA I'VE GOT YOU NOW MY PRETTIES! MAUAHAHHAHHA!"
"AHHHHHHHHHHH!" I shrieked as I backed up against the bath tub holding onto Akio as if my life depended on it. Right now I Sakura Kinomoto and Akio are backed up against the bath tub wall covered in ketchup, flour, feathers, and milk? While the all hyper and majestic Yukio is standing in front of us cackling like a freak.
Don't ask how we ended up like this I'll fill you in...later.
"HELPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP" yelled Akio.
"Do not worry young citizens I Super Syaoran am here to save you!" (enter Super man heroic tune)
Normal POV
"uhhh"
"ummm"
"hun?"
Both the twins and Sakura stared at Syaoran as if he had two heads.
"What?" questioned Syaoran confused as to why they were all staring at him like he was some sort of freak. Well maybe it was because he had just scrambled into the bathroom through a window of a height of over 30 ft, or because of what he had just said, or the fact that he was wearing a costume like superman that said "Super Syaoran" on it, ...or perhaps it was just the fact that there was a spider crawling on Syaoran's head. DING DING DING WE HAVE A WINNER! Yes it is all of the above.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" three loud ear piercing screams were heard all over the neighbourhood as the twins and Sakura ran for their lives as far away from Syaoran as they could. Yes the twins are deathly afraid of spiders. As for Sakura she was more afraid of that gigantic disgusting mould growing on Syaoran's head...No I'm joking! She's afraid of spiders tooo.
"Yes another citizen saved thanks to Syaoran Li!" (insert heroic music again) he flew out the window with a triumphant smirk until he realized he couldn't fly started flapping his wings for dear life and hit his head on 12 tree branches before landing on a giant bean bag the twins use to kill bugs with. Yes the twins love all bugs except spiders.
Back to Sakura!
Sakura's POV
"runnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn boys!" I yelled over my shoulders as we sprinted down 7 flights of stairs as far away from that spider and "Super Syaoran" as we could.
"Ahhhhhhhh!" I heard a sudden shriek. I turned back to see Yukio and Akio lying on the stair case. Both had toppled over and had broken their arms.
"Chickens!" I cursed as the door opened and in walked my neighbours.
End Of Flash back!
Sakura's POV
I hadn't told Touya about the Syaoran thing because I knew he'd go beserk if he ever found out "that gaki" as he calls him was the main reason the twins were running away. That day my neighbours went crazy and said they would lock me out of the house so I would freeze to death. How do I know they went crazy? 1: I don't live with them so they aren't locking me out of my house and two summer just finished so I can't possibly freeze to death ya know what I mean?
"ahahahah your such a kajuu the twins probably tripped because of the earthquake that came with you running hahaha"
"Sakura no Kajuu!" I yelled at him as I stomped on his foot real hard.
But he just smirked and sped out of the house.
"phew finally" I thought as I kicked the door closed behind me but it opened again.
"TOUYA GET OUT!" I yelled as I tried to push the door closed but he wouldn't budge and kept trying to push it open.
That is until I caught a flash of amber and lept out from behind the door which suddenly flew open and in fell...
"Oh crap"--- (Syaoran)
"Watch it!"------- (Eriol)
"ahhhhhhhh"----- (Yamazaki)
"owwww!"------ (Roy)
"aieeeee"---------- (Hiro)
"Getoffmee"------- (Jake)
"Nice of you to drop by" I said sarcastically as I glared at them all. They got up and started wiping the dust off there pants.
"But what the hell are you doing here?" I asked ticked.
"ummm it's 4:00 clock" said Hiro happily showing me his watch as if I was retarted as the others snickered staring at me.
Normal POV
"No duh! Your not supposed to be here until five! And you are wasting my time! Get out!" she shrieked as she tried to push them out but to no avail.
"We're not leaving we're here to help you" stated Syaoran as he took a seat on the stair case near the door.
"Oh you guys wanna help do you?" Sakura asked her face turning lopsided with an evil smirk as if she were about to murder them all and take over the whole entire infested world!
"ugh ummm I thought we did...ehehe" siad Eriol sheepishly as he hid behing Roy.
"Okay fine! Roy and Eriol go down to the basement and do the laundry that's sitting beside the window." she ordered and they sped away quite fast afraid of the extremely murderous look on Sakura's face and neither dared talking back to her in this frenzy.
"Yamazaki go to the backyard sweep up all the fallen leaves, then take out the garbage, and mow the lawn NOW!" she screeched seeing as how he was about to argue but instead ran out the door.
"Jake get outside and clean every window this frikin house possesses which would be 67! Go now!" she yelled at him.
"bu..but..Sakura how am I supposed to reach all the windows from outside your house?" he asked stuttering.
"I don't give a DAM! BUT THEY BETTER ALL BE CLEAN OR EL..." She didn't even have the chance to finish as he had already sped out the door.
She then turned to the one person remaining who seemed to be dead scared of what was to come.
"AND YOU!" she snarled at him viciously "You will clean this whole house! I want this whole house spotless with in an hour! Is that understood?" she asked in a quiet but deadly tone.
"ye...yess" stated Syaoran before Sakura turned around and headed back to the kitchen.
5:00 pm
Ding Dong
Sakura's POV
Ding Dong
"Coming!" I yelled as I finished washing the dishes and headed over to open the door. 'That's odd I don't hear a sound I wonder what the guys are up to' I thought as I opened the door.
"Hey! I'm soo happy you guys are finally here!" I said as Tomoyo, Rika, Naoko, Meling, and Chiharu all walked in.
"Glad to be here Saku!" they all said in unision.
"Are the guys here yet?"asked Chiharu as she hung up her coat and headed for the living room area as the others followed suit.
"Yup!" I chirped happily as the guys suddenly popped out, out of nowhere with extremely tired expressions. I giggled looking at their tired expressions.
"Why I outta..." began Syaoran as he stepped towards me pointing his index finger at me as if about to give me a piece of his mind for giggling at him but at that meer moment all five of them fell over fast asleep.
Normal POV
The girls sweat dropped staring at the guys whom were now unconciously hugging onto each other fast asleep.
"Are you thinking what I'm thinking girls?" inquired Noako with a mischievious smirk.
"Yeah!" yelled Rika and Chiahru.
"Time to put PLAN MAKEOVER INTO ACTION!OHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO" yelled Tomoyo and Meiling in unision.
"Ummm do I even want tp know?.." I asked as I stepped away from the six who had now all began to laugh evilly.
"OHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOOHOOH! YES!"
"Crap"
DUN DUN DUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!
TUNE IN NEXT TIME FOR A NEW EPISODE OF "A SERIES OF HILARIOUS EVENTS!"
WILL THE GIRLS RAPE THE GUYS? GIVE THEM GIRLY MAKEOVERS? OR MORE? TAKE PICTURES AND BLACK MAIL THEM?
IM NOT TELLING YOU! MUAHAHHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAA! NO I LOVE YOU GUYS! SCROLL DOWN! HEHE!
AND I'M EXTREMELY SORRY FOR NOT UPDATING FASTER! I PROMISE ANOTHER UPDATE VERY VERY VERY SOOON! OK? HEY! STOP TROWING TOMATOES AT ME! PLEASE? OK GUYS THANK YOU ALL FOR REVIEWING! YOU GUYS ROCK! BUT I HAVE A FEELING THIS CHAPTER STUNK! DID IT? LET ME KNOW IN YOUR REVIEWS! THANKS AND I AM GOING TO PUT UP ANOTHER UPDATE THIS WEEK! THANK YOU FOR ALL YOUR SUPPORT! SCHOOL AND A HECTIC LIFE...AGAIN! LOL! SORRY! PLEASE REVIEW! THANKS BYE! S&S FOREVER!