Disclaimer: you don't own saw, I don't own saw, NOBODY HERE OWNS SAW!
I moan as the doorbell rings. It's Amy and Kat, 'Robbie' invited them for a study thingy. If there's one thing I don't need, its people hanging around my door and risking my secret. I didn't empty the trash after I threw the test away, I didn't think to. I haven't worn any of my tight stuff for weeks now, so they'll probably notice that too. Kat and Amy might be a little rough around the edges but damn it there not stupid. It's too late to make up for my mistakes now, they're already running around, looking at stuff and talking loudly. As I watch their excitement I can't help but feel good. OK, so they're here at a really shit time and yes, there's a really good chance that one of them will find the test and smell a rat, but Kat and Amy are like my best friends now and I want to spend every minute with them. My favourite part is their outfits. Amy is stick thin, but she doesn't try to show it off, wearing T-shirts and baggy jeans everywhere. Kat doesn't care about weight either. She's not quite as thin as Amy is but she's just as pretty. She ties her long red hair into bunches on top of her head, and wears shorts and camisoles. I don't really have a style. Before baby came I wore tight tops and short skirts, just because I could. I never thought about what effect they might have had on anybody else.
'OH, MY, GOD!' screeches Kat, jumping and pointing at the wall. Amy, Rob and me all look over to see a completely blank, white washed wall. I think Kat has problems.
'Yes Kat, we call that a wall' sighs Rob, sitting back in his chair. He's doing both mine and his homework, biology. I hate biology. It always lets you down.
'no' grins Kat, skipping over to the wall 'it's hollow' she knocks at it hard, the wall makes a sort of echoed thunk. She's right. Hollow.
'Cool….' I breathe. My hands instinctively move to my gut, protecting the teeny foetus. Amy looks at me. For some reason I feel exposed under her gaze, I stand up and walk over to Kat.
'How'd you know?' I ask quickly. I look back at Amy to see if her expression has changed. It has. She looks like she's decided something big.
'Maybe she knew by the big gaping whole in the wall' laughs Rob, oblivious to the tension. He points to the top left part of the wall, where, as he said, a large piece of it is missing. Kat turns around, red faced.
'WELL PARDON ME FOR ACTUALLY GETTING EXITED ABOUT SOMETHING, UNLIKE THOSE OF US WHO JUST SIT IN THE DARK CRYING ALL DAY!'
It all happens in a flash.
Rob's hand flies out and knocks Kat flying, she lands with a thump on the floor and screams a he advances on her. He'll do it. He's mad enough to. I think even Amy knows these are Kat's last moments. I act fast. My leg flies out and Rob lands in a heap on the couch. I wait for him to stand up, full of rage, but he doesn't. Instead, he lies there, sobbing into the couch cushions. Amy rushes Kat into the bathroom and locks the door. Clever girl. Slowly, I approach Rob.
'Rob?'
No answer
I take a few steps closer
'Rob?'
Nothing
I crouch my his head and whisper in his ear
'Hoffman?'
He rolls over to face me, his eyes red and puffy. In that split second I see that he truly is hurting over something, and I think I know what.
'You miss her, don't you?' I ask quietly
Hoffman nods
'I know, I miss her too. If it weren't for her id be dead, long dead'
His fist clenches, and new tears brim his eyes. When he speaks, his voice is croaky.
'You know how, no-one could contact Amanda after she left?'
I nod
'Well, I tracked her down at her new place. It took a while but she eventually told me why she'd left'
My throat gets tight.
'Why?'
He looks at me
'She thinks you're pregnant'
No.
He's not supposed to know that.
I try to answer him but before I can Amy calls.
'JADE! COME HERE! HURRY!' Hoffman's eyes widen.
'You stay here.' I whisper 'I'll fix it' I run to the bathroom door and bang hard, Amy opens it slowly and leads me in. nothing seems wrong, Kat's up and healthy, apart from a sore cheek. Amy's fine too. What exactly is going on?
'Sit down' says Kat I sit on the loo and look up at both of them. They both look half-angry and half-terrified.
'Anything you want to tell us Jade?' demands Amy.
'No' I say shakily, this feels like a prison movie
'Not tired?' Kat asks, looking me in the eyes
'n-no'
'Been sick?'
'No'
'Mood swings?'
'No'
They both look at each other, and shake their heads. Amy produces a ball of tissues from her pocket. Slowly, she unwraps them. And there, in her hand, is the pregnancy test.
'wh-whats-' I begin
'NO' growls Amy 'tell us what you've been up to.'
I look up into their eyes, on the surface, all I see is pure fury, but as I stare, I can still see the same sweet, friendly girls who I became friends with just 2 weeks ago. I need to play on that.
I bury my head in my hands and sigh, tears seep through my eyelids and I look up to my friends.
'I was so scared. He- he said that if I didn't do it he-he'd hit me, and keep hitting me until I did it, I couldn't stop him. I really, wanted to b-but he had this-s really big
kni-fe and..'
I collapse into a pile of false/real sobs. They were fake because I was just using them to throw the girls off, but they were real because I knew that now Hoffman would HAVE to know.
'oh my god' whispered Kat, sitting down next to me. 'I'm so, so sorry'
Amy groans and rubs my back gently, I can feel her shaking.
A long time passes, I hear Hoffman bustling around in the kitchen. I know what Amy's going to say next...I just hope I'm wrong. I'm not
'we need to tell Bob' she whispers. I nod and get up quietly, Kant and Amy follow me into the living room, and stand on each of my sides. Hoffman is sitting at the table with a chicken sandwich, over his little tizzy. I sigh.
'Rob. I have something to tell you.'
he looks up, a piece of lettuce sticking out of his mouth. I sigh.
'I'm pregnant'
Silence.
The mouthful he's chewing drops from his mouth onto the floor.
After a while the silence gets too much for me, and I talk.
'I-it was an accident, I was walking home and this-this big guy….he had a knife.'
Hoffman stands. Looking hurt.
'Kat. Amy. Please leave'
They go quietly. I listen to the sound of their footsteps and wonder if it's the last time I'll ever hear them. Hoffman slumps on the couch, tears in his eyes. I sit gingerly next to him.
'it's yours.' I whisper gently.
'I know' he sighs
'and I'm keeping it'
'I know'
More silence.
I sigh heavily, and admit the thing that's been eating at me for weeks.
'I tried to convince myself that I wasn't telling you, because I was angry at you for not using protection. But that's a lie. I was scared. I thought that, because you and me weren't married or, I was young, you'd make me abort.'
Hoffman looks down at me, and for the first time today, he smiles.
' I would never make you do that.'
I blush.
'and, as for the whole marriage thing.'
He gets down on the floor
'Jade. Will you marry me?'
I didn't even know I was going to add that part!!!