Love and Affection

WARNING: This story contains explicit TCest

Rating: R

Pairing: Leo/Raph

Summary: When Raph is down and out, Leo tries to raise his brother's spirits.

Contrary to popular belief, Raphael did not enjoy being in a bad mood. He hated the dark emotions that weighed on his heart and warped his mind. Flashes of anger struck him hard, frequently filling him with a rage-fueled energy that he could only burn through physical exertion. Worse than that though were the times when that anger was accompanied by clouds of depression that rained upon him and left him completely crippled.

One such cloud loomed over him now. He sat on the floor of his bedroom facing the wall furthest from the door, hugging his knees to his chest and resting his head on top of them. His golden eyes, usually bright and alert, were dull and unseeing as he fell deeper and deeper into thought.

He was mulling over his actions during his latest encounter with The Foot. Just last evening, he and his brothers had spotted twelve of the henchmen by happenstance while on patrol in the Upper West Side. With Leonardo's blessing, the turtle team had trailed the nefarious ninja to Columbia University. Slipping past campus police and avoiding security cameras, The Foot soldiers had entered the Hammer Research Center through a fourth floor window. The four mutants followed suit, interrupting The Foot as they were ransacking a spacious laboratory and its adjoining office.

Firing off rapid instructions, Leo initiated a plan to ensure that Shredder's lackeys left with nothing but lumps and bruises. Raph raised no objections and jumped to action with every intention of doing as he was told. His primary responsibility was to watch Don's back while the genius recovered data that one Foot flunky was transferring from one of the lab's computers to a laptop bearing the Shredder's symbol on the cover. It was a simple task, one he had done countless times before, one that he should have had no problem performing.

But it all went to hell in a heartbeat.

The Foot must have finally figured out that Raph was a force to be reckoned with and should be taken down as swiftly as possible. At least half of the dozen of the criminals swarmed the turtle all at once. While Raph was busy fending off the attack, a seventh Foot soldier used the opportunity to strike the purple-masked.

Donnie's peripheral vision caught sight of the incoming blow a second too late. He jumped the way, but failed to totally avoid the swing of a sharp sword. The blade opened up nearly five inches of flesh on Donnie's left side. A gush of blood painted the olive-colored turtle's hip bright red as he tried to stem the flow while defending himself against his assailant's next offensive move.

Raph had heard his brother's small shout of pain and his head instantly snapped in Don's direction. The distraction earned him a sore jaw from a punch strong enough to knock him down. Hitting the floor triggered Raph's rage. His eyes alit with fire and he was on his feet in an instant, releasing his merciless fury on anyone in his way as he fought to reach Don. The genius had managed to hold his own thus far, but it was obvious that he was growing weak from blood loss. Raph came within feet of his injured brother when Mikey jumped in to save the day, cracking the skull of Don's attacker with a heavy blow from his nun-chuck. The orange-masked turtle hastily stowed his twin weapons and caught Don under his arms mere seconds before his knees gave out, leaving Leo and Raph to deal with the last three Foot ninja who were still conscious.

When their final enemy was disposed, Raph took it upon himself to savagely destroy the Foot's laptop in retaliation for the wound Donnie had received. Police sirens had started to wail in the distance as Leo barked new orders to his team. The terrapin leader had seized a hoodie from the back of a nearby chair and tied it firmly around Don's middle to stanch the flow of blood. Leaving Raph with the task of carrying Don and Mikey covering the rear, Leo proceeded to the hallway and ensured that it was clear before calling for the others to follow. The group swiftly made their way to the stairs at the far end of the hall, descended to street level, exited the building, and entered into the sewers a full three minutes before the deployment of law enforcement vehicles screeched to a halt in front of the research center.

They had made it back to the lair in record time. Master Splinter was waiting to greet them, as if he had sensed that something had gone awry during his sons' absence. Raph bustled past his father to get Donnie to the infirmary while Leo followed close behind, informing the mutant rat of the situation. As soon as Raph set his brother down on the exam table, Splinter had elbowed him aside to tend to Don who, even in his woozy state, continued to insist that everyone should stop worrying about him. Splinter had the genius patched in no time flat and sent everyone to bed once it was clear that there was no serious threat to Don's health.

Raph's body had been exhausted, but not his mind. Stretched out in his hammock, he stared up at the ceiling for hours replaying the fight over and over in his head. Any way he tried to look at it, Raph always came to the same conclusion: it was his fault that Don had gotten hurt.

That thought kept him awake until late the next morning when he finally drifted off to sleep. Some thirty minutes later his eyes popped open again and his conscience resumed its former blame game. Shamed and angry, Raph had chosen not to join his family first for dinner and then for supper. Instead, he had alternated between pacing the floor of his room and ramming his fists into the various inanimate objects that comprised his personal sanctuary. Neither activity provided him any relief. Eventually he fell to his knees, his energy drained and his spirit burdened. On the floor he had stayed, moving only when his knees grew sore from bearing his weight against the hard stone beneath him and unaware as the alarm clock on his nightstand slowly shifted closer to ten o'clock.

A soft tapping sounded at the door, snapping Raph out of his reverie. The red-masked ninja ignored the visitor, silently praying that they would give up and go away. Alas, he was to be denied for after the second knock went unanswered Raph heard his door creak open and close again. Eyes squeezing shut, he made a series of blasphemous statements inside his head as a pair of feet padded in his direction.

"Decided to stay in here for the rest of your life, have you?" Leonardo asked, coming to a stop behind his brother and mate. There was a hint of humor in his tone, but it faded when he received no reply. Frowning, he reached down to place a hand on Raphael's shoulder. "Raph?"

Raph cringed when the fingers landed upon him. He didn't want to be touched. He didn't want to talk. He just wanted to be alone. Shrugging his brother off, the turtle buried his face in his arms.

The rebuff stung, but not enough to make Leo want to leave. With a small sigh, the leader reached towards the bookshelf on his right and set down the plate of fresh chocolate chip cookies he had brought along. Then he knelt beside Raph and wrapped him in an embrace that the hothead resisted half-heartedly.

"What have I told you about taking the blame every time Don, Mikey, or I get injured during a fight?" Leo whispered and placed a soft kiss on Raph's temple. "Last night wasn't your fault."

"I was s'posed ta keep Don's protected," Raph argued, lifting his head to finally look at his brother. "And I failed ta do that."

"You did exactly what I ordered you to do," the blue-masked ninja countered. "And you were still trying to follow those orders even when The Foot had you surrounded."

Raph scoffed and glanced away. "I shouldn't have let that happen either."

"We can't always predict our enemies' actions," Leo reasoned. "You know that, Raph."

"Yeah, yeah," Raph replied and then fell silent.

The truth of Leo's words should have been a comfort to Raph, but they weren't. It seemed that the sai-wielder was destined to remain stuck in a funk. Yet Leo would not allow that to happen which became apparent when he gave Raph another kiss.

"I brought you something to eat," Leo announced.

"I ain't hungry," Raph told him.

As soon as he said it, his traitorous stomach gave a mighty growl. Raph's cheeks reddened and Leo chuckled. Releasing the hothead, he shuffled on his knees over to the bookshelf and reclaim the abandoned cookies. He returned to his former seat and wrapped one arm around his lover.

"Here," Leo offered, holding the plate in front of Raph's nose. "Your favorite."

Raph eyed the treat for a moment before turning his skeptical gaze to Leo. "Really? Do I look like a little kid ta ya?"

"I didn't think I could convince you to eat anything else," the leader explained. He gave his brother an encouraging nudge. "Come on, Raphie. I made them just for you."

Raphael loosed a huff of air. He knew Leonardo meant well and he didn't want to hurt his brother's feelings. Plus, his rumbling stomach was making it damn near impossible for him to deny his hunger. With his left hand, he selected the cookie at the top of the pile and lifted it to his mouth. It could have been the lack of food in the last 24 hours, but that first bite Raphael took could only been described as amazing.

"Ya made these?" Raph questioned somewhat doubtfully as he finished off the first cookie and reached for the second. "Or did ya bribe Mikey inta making them for ya again?"

"Mikey helped me make them," Leo admitted. "He said it was time that I learned how to cook because his stomach couldn't take any more abuse from my terrible food."

"Guess he's a decent teacher then," the sai-wielder commented and gestured at the plate Leo still held. "These are good." His right hand fell to Leo's thigh and gave it an affectionate squeeze. "Thanks."

"Anytime," the katana-wielder replied, fiddling with the tails of Raph's mask.

Conversation halted while Raph polished off every single one of the half dozen cookies. When he was finished, Leo placed the plate on the floor and settled his hand over top of Raph's which had lingered on his leg.

"Feeling better now?" Leo asked quietly, his lips returning Raph's cheek.

"Mmmm," Raph hummed while absentmindedly stroking Leo's inner thigh. His mood had improved marginally, but he was unwillingly to confess that fact.

Leo echoed the sound as he slowly kissed his way down Raph's neck to his shoulder. "I know what else will help…" Sliding a hand under Raph's arm, he hauled his larger brother upright. "...let's go…"

Raph's stiff muscles protested his sudden movement and he wobbled on his feet until Leo steadied him. Linking their hands, the katana-wielder led his mate out into the hallway and left towards the bathroom which was dark and empty. Leo flipped on the lights, pulled Raph inside, and locked the door. He maneuvered the sai-wielder over to the counter and left him standing there while he stepped to the extra-large bath tub, sealed the drain, and turned the taps to the positions that would produce the optimal water temperature.

Straightening, Leo turned back to his brother. Raph was leaning against the counter with his arms folded over his chest, his expression somber, and his gaze downcast. He looked vulnerable and when his sad eyes flicked up at Leo it seemed like he was silently begging to be loved. Leo's heart melted to the floor. Slowly, he crossed the room and tugged the hothead's arms open. Cupping Raph's face in his hands, Leo leaned in and kissed him.

Raph remained unreactive for half a minute. Then gently he began to press back. He had no idea how much he needed affection until Leo's lips fused with his. The dark cloud hovering above him finally started to break apart. Wrapping his arms around Leo, Raph clung to him desperately as their kiss grew ever deeper. Leo held out until Raph decided he'd gotten enough and pulled away. Their heated breath mingled together as the two terrapins rested their foreheads against each other.

Releasing Raph's face, Leo put his hands to work removing every piece of his brother's clothing starting with his bright red mask. Raph was forced to let go of Leo as the leader knelt down to remove his subordinate's kneepads. Each touch of Leo's fingers was both tender and teasing. The room's atmosphere was heating rapidly and not just because of the steam rising from the tub. Standing again, Leo took Raph's hands in his.

"Come on, Raphie," Leo coaxed while guiding his lover forward to the edge of the tub.

Dipping a tentative toe in the water, Raph deemed it to be an appropriate temperature and stepped inside carefully. Leo watched until Raph was seated before he undressed himself. He turned off the taps and climbed in behind the other ninja, trying not to slip as he got down on his rear and positioned his legs on either side of Raph. His added density made the water level rise to an inch below the tub's rim. Curling his arms around Raph's middle, Leo pulled him to his chest and leaned them both backwards until his shell hit the wall.

For several minutes, neither turtle did anything except appreciate the warmth that surrounded them and soothed the aches in their bodies. Leo eventually became more interested in Raph's exposed neck which he attacked with eager lips. Closing his eyes, Raph hummed as teeth nibbled on his skin. At the same time, a soapy sponge materialized from seemingly nowhere and began scrubbing his plastron. Raph's hands moved up and down the undersides of Leo's muscular thighs in imitation of the attention he was receiving.

"How is Don doing?" the hothead finally thought to ask, his eyelids flicking open again.

"A little tired," Leo replied, lifting his mouth away from his mate's delicious throat. "Other than that, he's just fine." His left hand drifted down to tweak Raph's firm butt cheek. "Though he does feel bad that you feel bad that he got hurt."

Jumping slightly from the hard pinch, Raph frowned. "He shouldn't be feeling bad…"

"And neither should you," the leader interrupted. "If you're going to blame anyone, blame the Foot Soldier who attacked Don. No more blaming yourself, okay?"

"Okay," Raph agreed after a long pause.

"Go see him in the morning. He wants to talk to you."

"I will."

Pleased with the answers, Leo kissed the side of Raph's head. His fingers crept along until they reached Raph's tail which they began to stroke. Raph shuddered, his grip on Leo's legs tightening. With his right hand, Leo continued to wash his mate's torso, gradually working his way towards the Raph's groin.

"Don thinks he's figured out what The Foot were after last night," the katana-wielder shared.

"…wh-…what's that?" Raph wondered breathily, flustered by the stiffening of his cock.

"The lab they broke into was directed by Dr. Malcom Tayes until he was fired last week," Leo explained. His sponge was focused solely on the widening slit in Raph's lower plastron. "Tayes is now on Shredder's payroll. Don's guessing that Shredder sent his men out to steal the doctor's research work since he no longer has rights or access to it."

"…so….Shredder wants-ahh…" Raph gasped as a thumb began to massage his puckered entrance in small circles. "…wants a new Stockman?"

"Possibly," the leader replied thoughtfully.

Biting his lip, Raph surrendered the last of his self-restraint and allowed his cock to make its appearance. "…ya think Chaplin's taken an early retirement option?"

Leo snorted with amusement. "With Shredder as his boss I think that's a guarantee."

That was the end of their short discussion. Leo let the sponge float free of his fingers in favor of taking Raph's erection in his grasp. He stroked the flesh from tip to base in slow repetition, grinning triumphantly as it filled out and hardened.

Raph was too busy concentrating on the combined sensations of warm water and Leo's hand on his shaft to realize that the thumb at his entrance had been replaced by a forefinger. The jointed probe, hot and wet, edged into Raph's ass. He squirmed at the intrusion, creating miniature waves in the tub. Leo hooked his feet under his brother's ankles and forced those strong emerald-colored legs to spread, granting him easier access to his target.

"I missed you in the shower last night," Leo confessed.

"Why?" Raph asked, his face and neck growing redder by the second. "'Cause ya had ta jack yerself off for once?"

Leo chuckled, glad that Raph's sense of humor was returning. "You know you're my favorite toy to play with. I love the sounds you make when I squeeze here…" He increased the pressure of his grip on the cock he held then quickly inserted his entire finger in his mate's ass. "…and push there…"

Toes twitching, Raph gasped and groaned from Leo's handling. Leo withdrew his finger halfway, thrust it back in, and gave it a twist. Raph jerked and groaned even louder when Leo's exploring digit tapped the nerve bundle buried inside him. Putting power to his leg muscles, Leo held his brother in place while he began repeating the action. On the third thrust he also resumed his stroking of the thick cock in his hand. Raph quickly became a panting, moaning mess as Leo brought him closer and closer to sensory overload.

"…sh-shit…" Raph swore when he erupted half a minute later.

Leo's hands stilled. A smug smile was on his face as he observed Raph's member twitching and spilling its seed. He waited until his sibling's tremors of release abated before he slid his finger free of that gloriously tight ass. Slowly, Leo pushed on Raph's shoulder until the sai-wielder was sitting upright so that he could remove himself from the tub.

Raph watched Leo step out, noting the sizeable swell growing in groin region. Grinning, he reached forward to open the drain and exited the bath as well. The katana-wielder was waiting for him with a clean, white towel which he promptly secured around Raph's waist. Slipping his arms around his mate, Leo gave Raph a kiss that conveyed every bit of the desire raging inside him. He pulled back before he got too carried away and hastily knotted a towel around his own middle. Without a word, he turned and headed for the door, pleased when he heard Raph immediately following suit.
Their migration across the lair was an urgent one and thankfully unwitnessed by any other member of the household. A second after his bedroom door clicked shut Leo had Raph down on the mattress, their respective towels stripped away. Climbing in between Raph's still damp thighs, Leo thrust his recently emerged cock into his brother's stretched hole. The leader made love to his subordinate furiously, bringing them both to simultaneous orgasm some minutes later. In their afterglow, Leo lay spooned against Raph, the bigger turtle tucked snugly in his embrace.

Completely satiated and totally exhausted, Raph was beginning to feel that he would finally drift off to an uninterrupted rest. But his mind had different plans. Just as his eyes closed, Raph's thoughts returned once again to his actions during yesterday's misfortune. Guilt made his eyes pop back open and he prepared to spend another night staring blankly at the wall.

"I know what you're thinking," Leo murmured suddenly. "Stop it."

"We've been together too long if ya can figure out what I'm thinking in a pitch black room," Raph deflected.

"You're not that hard to figure out," the eldest replied. "Especially wearing that big, bright heart on your sleeve." Hugging Raph tighter, he touched his lips to the back of his brother's neck. "For the last time, Raph, it's not your fault."

Leo's words contained a magic that made Raph's negative thoughts disappear. Sighing, he felt for Leo's hand and weaved their fingers together.

"It's not my fault," he reiterated quietly.

Hearing this, Leo smiled and kissed him again. "You know we're going to be together forever, right?"

Raph went silent for a minute then snorted and glanced back over his shoulder. "Geezus, yer a big sap."

"A big sap who loves you."

"…love ya, too, Leo."