*Thank-you for the reviews on the last chapter. They were greatly appreciated. Thank-you all so much!
Three weeks had gone by rather quickly for both John and Nicki. Everything was starting to return back to normal. John had returned back to work and Nicki swallowed her pain and began to clean up Judson's room. She wasn't sure what she was going to do with all this toys and things but she felt it was best if she cleaned up the room because it was hurting her more with a room filled with his bed, clothes and toys reminding her that he would never again play in that room or sleep in that room. She was in the middle of packing up boxes when her mom came into the room. "Hello, Nicki," she says.
"Hi," responds Nicki. "Do you remember when we got this stuffed frog at the fair?" she asks with a laugh, "I must have played that game a thousand times just to win this for him. He loved this frog."
"Yeah," says her mom with a smile. "This room brings back so many memories. Remember when you two moved in here with me? I was so worried about having a child in my home but everything worked out. My day always started with Judson smiling at me telling me good morning. I loved eating breakfast with him. It was a great way to start my day. I loved playing games with him and just talking to him. I'm really going to miss him."
"Me too," says Nicki as she puts the frog into a box. "He was the joy of my life."
"Mine too," says her mom, "but you seem to be doing pretty well right now."
"Because I know he's in a better place and he's not sick anymore. He was in so much pain but now all his pain is gone. This wouldn't have been my choice but at least he isn't hurting anymore. I bet you he is running around with all the other children in Heaven. He hasn't run for a long time; probably since he was 5 or 6. I bet he's playing ball and jumping around. I bet he is having a lot of fun."
"I bet too," says her mom. "So," she says.
"So," says Nicki.
"How are you feeling?"
"I'm fine," says Nicki.
"Still feeling sick?"
"A little," says Nicki, "Why?"
"Because you have been sick for a while now," says her mom.
"Well, with everything going on it's no wonder," says Nicki.
"I think it's more than that," she says. "When's the last time you had a period?"
"Mama," she says and then it hits her it has been a while since she had her period. "What's the date today?"
"September 23rd," says her mom.
"September 23rd?" asks Nicki as her throat and mouth go dry. "September 23rd?"
"Yes," she says.
"I'm at least 3 weeks late with my period. I didn't even notice. I mean with all the stress I have been under it's no wonder."
"Nicki," says her mom, "why are you lying to yourself?"
"How am I lying to myself?"
"Because you are pregnant. It's obvious. You have been sick a lot lately, you're running late, your boobs are bigger and you have been eating a lot more."
"I'm not pregnant," says Nicki. "I can't be."
"Maybe you should take a test," says her mom. "All the signs are there."
"Mama," she says.
"Take the test," says her mom as she hands her a home pregnancy test.
"But Mama," she says with her heart pounding.
"But nothing," she says, "take the test."
"I can't be," she says.
"Take the test, Nicki," says her mom in her motherly tone.
"Fine," says Nicki, "but just so you know this is a waste of time. I'm just stressed." Nicki takes the test and heads to the bathroom. Her heart is racing. She doesn't even know what she will do if she is pregnant. It does make sense and it is totally possible. Her and John have never really been careful. She wasn't sure she wanted to be pregnant. She wasn't sure if she was ready to bring another child into the world. Her hands shook as she took the test out of the box. She followed the directions and then waited for the results. She began to tell herself that she wasn't pregnant. There was no way. It couldn't be. She took a deep breath as she picked up the pregnancy test, her hands began to sweat and her heart pounding. She looked down at the test and right in front of her eyes were two pink lines. She felt it rising up in her throat. She felt the lump choking her and her eyes filled with tears. She didn't sob but tears rolled down her cheek. It couldn't be. She wasn't pregnant. It had to be a false positive. "I'm not pregnant," she whispered through her tears. She took the test back to the room with her. "Mama," she says with her lump stuck in her throat.
"Nicki," her mom says in return before she hugs her. "It's going to be okay."
"I'm pregnant, Mama," she says.
"I don't know if I should be mad or happy," she says.
"Neither," she says as she hears John coming up the stairs. "Here," she says handing her mom the test. "I'm not ready to tell him yet."
"Okay," says her mom as John enters the room.
"Hey," says Nicki wiping her tears away.
"Hi," says John. "How are you?"
"I'm okay," says Nicki when really deep down she was scared, confused and hurt.
"Were you crying?"
"Yeah. You know just cleaning up in here brought back some memories," says Nicki. "So did you talk to your lawyer today?" she asks as her mom walks out of the room.
"Yeah," he says, "and my ex-wife isn't budging when it comes to Ava. I just want to see my daughter. It's not too hard to ask. She is my daughter."
"And what did your lawyer say?" she asks as they sit down on Judson's bed.
"He is going to do what he can. He said that she can't keep her from me. He said I have rights as her father to see her and I'm going to see her. I want to be in her life. I need to be in her life."
"You should be in her life. I want to meet her someday."
"And you will once I get this whole mess straightened out. She is such a little sweetheart. You'll love her. I just want my ex to give up the fight and just let me see her."
"Maybe you should stop child support for a while until she gives in," says Nicki.
"No that's not the way to go with her. That's just going to make her angrier."
"Okay," says Nicki. "I'm sure you're a great dad."
"Obviously not good enough," he says. "If I was better she would let me in her life."
"Don't talk like that," says Nicki as she takes his hand into hers. "You are obviously a better dad than Scott was."
"A monkey could be a better dad than Scott was," says John with a smile, "but anyway, are you still sick?"
"A little," she says as her stomach churns. "Do you ever think of having other kids?"
"Not really," says John. "Right now I can only focus on Ava. I can't be a dad again. I mean I also have my career to think about. And besides don't you think we should be married before we talk about babies and that type of life?"
"Marriage?" asks Nicki.
"Yes, Marriage but don't worry it will be a long time before I ask you to marry me. You and I know we are nowhere near getting married or having babies," he says making her feel sick to her stomach. She had no idea what she was going to do. "Besides, I want to enjoy being with you and only you right now," he says as he kisses the top of her head. "I love you, Nicki."
"I love you too," says Nicki.
"What's wrong?" he asks reading the look on her face.
"Nothing."
"Nicki."
"Fine. I'm pregnant," she says.
*A/N: So What did you think? Please review and thank-you for reading.