A/N: a big thank you to those who have taken the time to review. I love to hear your feedback!
Chapter 14:
Neil continued to enjoy his visits to the mission. There were some nights of debate; the most heated was over Ruby Mae's engagement to Will Beck. Much to Christy's dismay, the young couple intended to marry in a few weeks.
"Addie, you have to try to talk to her" Christy said. "I tried and I got nowhere. Tell her how hard it is to have a baby"
Neil looked between the sisters, Adelaide trying to rock Simon, who had started to fuss.
"It won't work, Christy" Neil said. "She won't listen and Adelaide would just be wasting her time. It is better for them to get married now before a babe comes along. And it will come"
"It doesn't have to" Christy retorted. "With just some education…" She turned to David. "I still can't believe you are marrying them. They are children"
"Yes, but that's part of my job" David replied, patiently. "You know that. I need to keep the respect of the people and refusing to marry them would just cause problems"
"Grantland is right, Christy" Neil said. "It's the way around here. Kids marry young"
"That doesn't mean it is right" Christy looked to Addie. "Adelaide. She adores you. Please try"
Adelaide shifted Simon to her other shoulder, trying to soothe him with a pacifier, but he was getting more and more aggravated. She sighed, trying to keep her patience with the baby. "I don't like her marrying at her age either, Christy, truly, I think marriage can be difficult enough on its own and to handle that at such a young age, is just asking for problems. I'm not sure I am the one to talk to her about it" Simon continued to fuss and Adelaide groaned, "What is your problem tonight, little boy?"
Seeing her growing frustration, Neil stood and walked over to where she was sitting. "I would stay out of it, Adelaide" He reached for Simon. "Here, let me try. He smells you and he wants to eat. It's making him surly"
"But I just fed him not even an hour ago" Addie moaned as Neil took him from her. "I'm not feeding him again"
"He soothes himself to sleep by you feeding him, but he has to learn not to" Neil said, jiggling him. "Eventually you are going to have to just put him down and let him work it out"
"Like having him scream until he falls asleep?" Adelaide asked, frowning, as Simon continued to fuss against Neil.
"Aye, it isn't pleasant, but you don't want to create a problem for you as he gets older"
She let out a long breath. "Nobody tells you how hard this actually is"
"Do you see what I mean, Addie?" Christy said. "That's exactly what Ruby Mae needs to understand. I mean you are a nurse and much older and if it is hard for you, think of how it will be for her"
"Glad I can be an object lesson for Ruby Mae" Adelaide shook her head, wearily. "My failures as a mother for all to see"
"Settle down now, lad" Neil began to pat him on the back and he soothed him to sleep. "You are doing a fine job with the babe, Addie. You are too hard on yourself"
"Of course, Adelaide. I didn't mean it that way" Christy murmured. "You are a wonderful mother"
They watched for a moment while Simon struggled against Neil and then finally nodded off. Adelaide didn't know whether to be thankful or irritated that it was that easy for him. "Maybe Neil should talk to Will, Christy" She threw the baby blanket in his direction. "apparently, children listen to him" she said, dryly.
Neil smirked, as he easily caught the blanket and held it against Simon. "Not a chance. And I still would advise you to stay out of it, Adelaide"
"But Addie" Christy prompted. "You have us supporting you with Simon. Ruby Mae has no one to help her with a child. It's not fair to her or any child that might come. You said yourself that you wouldn't have chosen this"
"No" Adelaide replied slowly as she looked at Simon snuggled against Neil. "But I'm glad God knew better. I don't have Simon, but I have his son, who everyday reminds me how blessed I was to know and love Simon for that short time. It's better for them to marry than to have to marry. I actually agree with Neil on this one"
Neil chuckled. "Really, lass? Tis a fine day when we actually agree on something like this"
"Don't let it go to your head" Adelaide retorted. Neil laughed again. "I think I will put the wee one down while he is still fast asleep."
"I'll take him upstairs" Adelaide stood.
"Nah" Neil shook his head. "He'll wake up if I give him back to you. I can just put him in your room. You don't mind?"
"If you don't mind…"
"Not at all" Neil said, easily. "I'll be back"
Christy watched Neil climb up the stairs. "I should have known you would side with him, Addie"
"What are you talking about?" Adelaide asked, incredulously as she sat back down.
"You are letting your feelings for him and your want for him to approve of you to get in the way of doing what's right for Ruby Mae" Christy's eyes filled with tears.
"Hold on a second" Adelaide retorted, quickly. "That's simply not true. I have never felt the need to agree with anybody just to have them like me. You know that. I can think for myself"
"Really?" Christy retorted. "First you wouldn't teach the children about" she paused, "you know what…and now you won't have a simple conversation with a young girl that could possibly change her life. You normally wouldn't hesitate to get involved to make things better for people you care about. But Neil says he wouldn't get interfere so you don't. What happened to my sister?"
Adelaide's eyes grew wide. "You are so wrong here, Christy. I happen to think that Neil is right about this. The world that these children grow up in is completely different than our world. This is what they know and even so there are girls that we know that were not all that much older than Ruby Mae when they got married. I really don't think it is my place to get involved. I agree with Neil, but if I didn't, I would have been the first one to tell him so. And by the way, if I did, he wouldn't care. We can have a difference of opinion without getting our feelings hurt or jeopardizing our friendship"
"And you think I can't?" Christy asked, wiping her eyes.
"Christy…" David said, quickly. "I don't think your sister meant that…"
"I just can't believe that you can't see it" Christy exclaimed, interrupting them. "It is much too soon for this."
Adelaide stilled. "Meaning?"
"Christy, be careful of what you are saying…" David tried to intervene again.
"No, David, I've really tried to hold my tongue, but she has to see it" Christy shook her head, hurt feelings taking over rational thinking, "Adelaide, Simon hasn't been gone for that long. It is too soon."
"Too soon for what?" she asked, her voice low. "Are you saying that that I am not mourning my husband properly?"
Christy remained quiet and Adelaide's heart skipped a beat, her feelings incredibly wounded. She swiped at her eyes.
"I loved my husband, Christy, and for you to imply otherwise, that hurts" Adelaide continued. "You know Simon meant the world to me and that his loss shattered me"
"But I see the way you look at him" Christy told her. "It's obvious to everyone who has eyes that you care for him"
"I fail to see what the problem is even if I do. Simon has been gone for almost a year. He would have wanted me to move on with my life and not mourn him forever. And frankly, my relationship with Neil is none of your business, Christy. Or anybody's business except Neil's and myself. I think you would do well to stay out of it"
Christy stood. "I didn't mean to make you mad. I think I'm going to bed" Tears filled her eyes and she could tell that her words hurt her.
Adelaide groaned, feeling bad she hurt Christy's feelings, but also frustrated that she was being so sensitive. "How is this my fault?" she asked, but Christy just shook her head and went to bed.
David stood too. "I'm not a stupid man, Addie. I know she had feelings for MacNeill when she married me. And we are happy together in spite of it. But seeing you and him so close, it bothers her"
"So, what am I supposed to do about that?" Adelaide asked. "We grew close. I didn't want it to happen. I wasn't looking for it. It just did. And I'm not even sure what is happening myself. It could be nothing"
"I'm not saying you did anything wrong" David told her. "I'm just saying that it would be easier for all of us if you didn't go there with the Doc. Especially for my marriage. Not to mention, he isn't a believer" He paused. "If it is too hard to stay and not give in to those feelings, then maybe it is time you think of other options for yourself and Simon"
"So, you are saying I should leave before anything does happen?" Adelaide asked, tears blinding her vision.
"I can't make that decision for you" David replied. "But I would think about it" He patted her shoulder before following Christy.
Adelaide was lost in her thoughts when Neil came down the stairs. "Everybody gone?" he asked.
She nodded, wiping at her eyes. "Did Simon stay asleep?" Adelaide asked, her voice cracking.
"Aye" he studied her carefully. "What has happened?"
She sighed as she buried her head in her hands. "You don't want to know. Trust me"
He frowned. "If you are troubled by something, I do want to know" He sat next to her. "Tell me what the matter is, Adelaide"
There was tenderness to his tone that she couldn't help but respond to. She lowered her hands and turned to him.
"Christy just said that I sided with you because I…" her face flushed. "Oh bother, I don't know" She twisted her hands together, not really wanting to admit the truth.
"She's jealous" Neil groaned, knowing exactly what she meant. "Oh, that's great"
"David thinks I should leave before it ruins their marriage" she bit her lip and Neil's look was stormy.
"You aren't going anywhere" he told her, adamantly. "He needs to stay out of our business. I care for your sister too, Addie, but for Grantland to pressure you to leave is ridiculous. If his marriage is ruined, it will truly have nothing to do with you. I'm going to talk to him" Neil stood and Adelaide's hand shot out to grab his.
"No don't" she tugged his hand. "As you said, it's my decision. I'm not going to do anything I don't want to do. I'm not going anywhere. Come sit with me again. Please, Neil"
Neil looked irate for a few moments longer, but at her pleading look and the feel of her hand against his, he settled down. He sat back down next to her and she dropped his hand.
Adelaide's lip trembled as she fought crying. "Christy implied we are acting inappropriately- so soon after Simon's death-that I'm not mourning him properly"
"That's a weighty accusation" Neil retorted. "I can't believe she would say that to you"
"Indeed" Adelaide rubbed her hands over her face. "She said it in anger- she wasn't thinking. I don't think she quite meant it…or at least I hope that is the case. I'm afraid I lost my temper. I told her it was none of her business and to stay out of it. It just hurt that she would imply that my friendship with you somehow negates my grief over Simon's death- that I love him less because I…" she sighed.
They were silent for a few moments, before Neil spoke.
"What do you think?" Neil asked her, quietly. "Do you feel like you are not mourning Simon in the way that you should?"
She shook her head. "I truly don't think we have done anything wrong. And I have mourned Simon's death, but it has been almost a year. Propriety wise, it is fine and even if it wasn't, I wouldn't care. I know we haven't done anything wrong"
"Yet at the same time" Neil took a breath. "There is something here, lass. We can't continue to ignore it much longer. We are long overdue for a discussion about this"
She swallowed hard, her heart pounding. She nodded. "I know" she whispered.
"Things have changed between us, Adelaide" Neil told her, his voice low. "I can understand you are nervous about it, but I need to know how you feel about us moving forward"
"How did you know I'm nervous about it?" Adelaide asked. "Am I that obvious?"
"Oh, Adelaide" Neil chuckled. "You have never been timid since the moment we have met and all the sudden there are moments when you are downright shy around me. You have a terrible case of the nerves. And you wouldn't be nervous unless you felt something too"
Adelaide paused. How did he do that? He just seemed to get her and it had always been that way. Having Neil understand her so well made her nerves settle down. The tension left her as she relaxed.
"Is that your official diagnosis, doctor?" Adelaide asked, with a playful smile.
"Aye" Neil responded, with his own smile.
"And what's your cure for it?" Adelaide questioned, lightly.
"It's simple" Neil told her. "Tell me what's going on with you. We have always been able to talk about anything with ease. This shouldn't be any different"
"Very well" She took a breath. "Things have changed, you are right. But to act on it-there isn't any turning back, Neil. I'm not sure I'm ready."
"Are you at least open to it?" Neil asked, studying her carefully. "I understand that you don't want to diminish Simon's memory"
"I didn't say that" Adelaide began but Neil waved her off.
"You didn't have to" Neil replied. "I know protecting Simon's memory is important for you, but also for the babe"
"It is" She nodded. "After the baby was born you asked me if I ever thought I could remarry and I told you I could never picture myself with anybody but Simon. That's not exactly the case anymore. I loved Simon and he was such a good man, but I don't want to shut myself off to the possibility of loving someone else just to preserve his memory. He wouldn't want that for me and I don't want that for me either"
"I'm glad to hear you say that, lass" Neil told her.
"But what about Christy?" She wrung her hands.
Neil shrugged. "It's the idea she is struggling with. I think she loves Grantland, but I think she misses our friendship. I understand where she is coming from. I miss her friendship too, but it's better if we continue to put some distance between ourselves"
Adelaide cleared her throat. "I have to ask" she took a breath-almost dreading his answer, "I'm a lot like my sister. We have always been told that, besides the obvious resemblance, our personalities are similar"
"I see you as a completely different person, Addie" Neil assured her, his voice firm. "I like you for you. It has nothing to do with your sister. And you are quite different from your sister- our relationship and the way we interact is world of difference than how Christy and I interacted"
"I don't want to be her replacement" Adelaide told him, honestly.
"Trust me" Neil responded adamantly, "you are nobody's replacement"
"Because, Neil, she has always been everyone's favorite…"
"Adelaide, lass" Neil's voice was patient, "I like you better. My feelings for you are deeper and stronger than they were for Christy"
"What?" Adelaide paused, startled by his words. "Truly?"
"Aye"
"But you were devastated when she married David. I saw that myself"
"I think I was more upset over another loss- I could picture another woman in my life for the first time since Margaret. It allowed me to hope and when she chose Grantland, that hope was gone. I haven't thought of your sister like that in a while. I will care for her as a friend, but when she married Grantland, that was it for me. And for quite some time now, the only person I see a future with is you" He paused, "If you give me a chance, Adelaide, I think I can put to rest your fears in that regards"
"Okay then" she nodded. Neil continued, "Your sister had objections based on my lack of belief. Do you have those same objections?"
She bit her lip and was silent for a few moments before sighing, "I should have them"
"But you don't?" Neil asked, a bit surprised.
She struggled. "When I could tell that you and Christy had feelings for each other, I wanted to go to Christy and confront her about it, but Simon told me to stay out of it- that it wasn't a good idea to be married to an unbeliever. And our faith was a huge part of our relationship, but when he died…" she paused. "I struggle with it at times-you know that and I'm not one to judge. I know what kind of man you are- faith or no faith. And I see our potential. So, the answer is I should, but…" her voice trailed off.
"You don't" Neil finished for her.
She nodded. "That doesn't mean I don't pray every day for you, Neil"
He chuckled. "I would expect no less from you, Adelaide" He reached to lightly grip her fingers. "Take it slow, lass?" he asked.
"Alright" she looked at him, her gaze turning playful again, "but maybe not too slow. I can be an awfully impatient person"
"I had no idea" Neil responded solemnly before both he and Adelaide laughed, the mood lightening considerably.
Neil and Adelaide were both kept busy for the next few weeks, various illnesses or emergencies around the Cove, but seemingly, never at the same place. They would catch up for brief moments, Neil taking care to check in with her and keep her up to date (and ask her to check on certain patients), but never an extended amount of time together. Adelaide found herself thinking of him often and missing him fiercely. There was something to the saying that absence makes the heart grow fonder- her heart was growing by leaps and bounds.
Christy apologized for her behavior that night. When Adelaide tried to talk to her about and her relationship with Neil, Christy said that she didn't owe her an explanation. Adelaide dropped it, but knew that eventually, they would have to have a longer conversation about it. Christy also accepted Adelaide's decision not to talk to Ruby Mae about her marriage and the wedding took place in April.
"You look exhausted" Adelaide proclaimed as she juggled Simon on her hip. Ruby Mae's wedding ceremony had been simple, yet lovely and the party was already starting to come to life with right exciting jollification, music and laughter creating a light mood.
"Lovely to see you too, Miss Addie" Neil teased as he ticked Simon's side, causing him to giggle.
She smiled up at him. "I missed seeing you, Neil"
"Oh really, lass?" Neil's smile was wide.
"Is that a bad thing?" Adelaide asked, lightly.
Neil laughed, "No, I would say that it is a very good thing. It has been a while, hasn't it?"
"Yes, when you said you wanted to take things slow, I didn't think you meant snail-paced" Adelaide teased, shifting Simon to her other hip.
"Funny how it works out that way" Neil responded. He reached out and let Simon take his finger. "We may have to speed things up a bit to make up for lost time"
"Hum" Adelaide pondered it. "That wouldn't be unwelcome, Doctor MacNeill"
"Very good then"
They watched the others begin square dancing. The music- Jeb's fiddle, Wraight Holt's banjo playing was infectious- the music just grabbed hold and made one want to join in on the lively fun.
Neil noticed her watching intently. "Does that look like fun to you, Addie?"
"I've never been one for much dancing, much to my mother's everlasting frustration"
"Your people's dancing I'm sure, but this is different. All you have to do is follow directions"
"And we know how well I do that" Adelaide retorted, sarcastically and Neil threw back his head and laughed, causing Simon to turn his head and stare at him with wide eyes.
"Sorry lad" Neil patted his head. "Your mama is just so funny"
Miss Alice came along side them.
"Would thee like me to take little Simon for a while?" she asked quietly.
"Aye" Neil replied for her and Adelaide scolded, teasingly, "Miss Alice asked me, Neil"
"I'm just encouraging you in your answer, Addie. You need a break from nursing and mothering. And I want to dance with you. Doctor's orders"
"Well, when you put it like that" Adelaide responded as she handed Simon to Miss Alice, "Thank you, Miss Alice"
"Enjoy thyself. We shall be fine. I think the women will make quite a fuss over the baby as usual"
Miss Alice left with Simon, going to take a seat by Miss Hattie, who was chatting away with Christy.
"Let's go. I'll help you" Neil reached for her hand and Adelaide felt a jolt of excitement. She had missed him.
Neil and her danced, cove-style, which was so much more fun that society balls. He lifted her up as if she weighed nothing, spun her around, all the while, they weren't short on laughter or small talk. They danced several dances before Neil led her away from the group.
"You're exhausting me" Neil told her, kissing her head gently, before pulling away.
"Me?" Adelaide laughed. "You were exhausted to begin with, though you would never had known that"
"True" Neil replied. "I feel better than I have in days, though" He handed her a drink and she took it, gratefully.
She looked across the way to Opal, whose eyes were twinkling, having watched them together.
Neil followed her gaze. "I think we have been caught, lass" he reported.
"Um, I think we had been caught before we even realized we could have been caught" Adelaide retorted back.
"What?" Neil looked at her.
She shrugged. "That really didn't make much sense, did it?"
He laughed. "No, but I gathered your meaning. So, Opal talked to you before I said anything that night" Neil grinned at her. "That's sure interesting"
Her face flushed a little, but ever perceptive Neil didn't miss the slight rise in color. "I didn't say that"
He touched her cheek, gently. "Nah, but this did" He looked around, before continuing, "And oh, it's about to get much worse" he added, almost gleefully.
"Meaning?" she looked at him, quizzically.
"Has anybody explained to you the mountain custom of the shivaree?" Neil asked, amused.
"Nooo" Adelaide said, slowly, aware of his fun with her. "Should I be concerned?"
"It's all in good fun" Neil assured her. "Well, most of it. Some of it's pretty crude. The shivaree is the mountain wedding ceremony"
"I thought we already had ceremony" Adelaide commented, confused.
"Nah, that was just the formalities. This is the real ceremony of becoming man and wife if you gather my meaning"
Adelaide's eyes grew wide and Neil chuckled. "You got riding the rail which is happening over there" He pointed to where Will was being carried around by a bunch of the men on a wooden rail.
"I see" Adelaide took another sip of her drink.
"You do understand the significance, aye? Or shall I explain it to you?" Neil had a distinctive gleam in his eye and Adelaide nearly spit out her drink.
"I got the underlying meaning to that, Neil" Adelaide choked out and Neil patted her on the back.
"Okay there, lass?" he grinned, rather wickedly, having no shame.
"Just fine" Adelaide tried to take another sip.
"And then there is, of course, putting the bride to bed which is the culmination of the shivaree"
"Putting her to bed?" Adelaide asked, "Where?"
"Why here, Adelaide, of course" Neil replied. "Well in the cabin that is"
"I don't understand"
"Don't you?" Neil laughed. "Basically the custom of all the married folks getting the bride ready for her wedding night and sending her groom into her so they can properly consummate…" he paused, seeing the blush increase tenfold. "Don't be so embarrassed by it. I know you are well acquainted with the ways between a husband and a wife. Your babe is proof enough of that"
"Yes, of course, but I told you. We don't talk about it" Adelaide murmured, now even more embarrassed by his calling her out on the fact that she found it incredibly uncomfortable to discuss this when he knew fully well that she had been married and had sex before.
Neil took pity on her. He put his arm around her waist and pulled her close. "So, Opal is going to come over here and let you join the womanfolk in putting Ruby Mae to bed. Just thought I should warn you" he said in her ear.
Her heart skipped at his closeness to her. "I thought it was only married people…"
"You are a widow. That counts too" Neil told her, simply. "Try not to be too embarrassed. It's a way of life around here. It will actually give you a good opportunity to bond with the cove women"
"I can be fun too, Neil" Adelaide retorted.
Neil laughed at her indignant expression. "Of course. I think you are incredibly fun, lass"
Opal approached them. "I needs Miz Addie, Doc, if you can stop sweetin on her enough to spare her"
Neil sighed dramatically as he released her. "I suppose, Opal, but it is hard not to be sweet on Miss Addie"
"Listen to you" Opal shook her head, smiling, widely. "She's good for you" Opal reached for her hand. "Let's go. I tried to get Miz Christy to come, but she said she had to take care of Simon"
Adelaide turned to Neil, "She should have to come too. She can't use my baby to…"
"You are different than your sister, lass" Neil waved her off. "Go on with ye, woman" Adelaide began to walk away, but she stopped when Neil called out, "And Addie?"
Adelaide turned back around. "Yes?"
"You might want to take notes, lass"
"Why is that?" she asked.
"You might need it one day. Best be prepared"
Adelaide stared at him, not sure how to take that until he winked at her, his face breaking out into a grin.
Opal chuckled and gently looped her arm around Adelaide's. "Come on, Miz Addie. Just ignore him"
Adelaide allowed Opal to usher her away.
"Should I convince my sister to come?" she asked. "Ruby Mae loves her"
"Don't fret about ye sister" Opal told her softly. "She has to be more cautious about things being a preacher's wife and all. And don't be shy about being around us, Miz Addie. We are all glad you are here"
She led her to inside the cabin where the women were gathered around. A few welcomed her.
"You and the Doc, Miz Addie?" Fairlight asked, with a smile.
"We were wondering when the Doc would get around to making his feelings known" Mary told her. "He sure is happy"
"Loves that lad of yours something fierce" Lizzie added, as she put her arm around her to give her a brief hug. "You look right pretty today, Miz Addie. The Doc has been makin eyes at you all day"
Adelaide blushed.
"She's right. The Doc is right smitten with you" Mary said.
"It is about time, Miz Addie" Ruby Mae told her from the center of the circle. Adelaide hadn't even seen her there. "Whys I had seen it long ago- the Doc never hanged around the mission as much as he did when you were in the family way. And if you could see the way he stormed about when he didn't like something she was doing. It was clear as day. You'll be next, Miz Addie" she told her.
"We haven't" she began to protest and Fairlight reached over and patted her arm. "Of course not, Miz Addie. We are just happy to see the Doc so happy" She took charge. "Let's get Ruby Mae ready now. Enough of the chitter- chatter"
They dressed Ruby Mae in a thin nightgown and Adelaide brushed her hair out for her, tying it up in a lose ponytail with a ribbon.
"Are ye nervous?" Opal asked her, quietly as she watched.
Ruby Mae nodded, shivering slightly.
Adelaide squeezed her shoulder. "Don't be. I was so nervous at first too"
"You nervous?" She turned to look at her. "I can't rightly believe that, Miz Addie"
"Well, yes" Addie said. "All women are a bit nervous on their wedding night. But Simon was sweet and it did turn out to be great fun in the end" She patted her shoulder. "No worries, Ruby Mae. You'll be fine"
Opal smiled at her words. "Miz Addie is right, Ruby Mae. You'll see" They heard a knock. "Here are them menfolk"
Adelaide stepped out of the way as then men led Will in. Her mind wandered to Simon and their wedding night. There was an ache, but it was overpowered by just happiness at remembering him and their time spent together.
Opal led her out, looping her arm around hers. "Are you thinking on your husband?" she asked, quietly.
"It just brings back memories" she sighed. "but it doesn't make my heart feel like it is going to burst anymore"
"You are moving on, that's just it" Opal told her. "There is nothin wrong with that, Miz Addie"
"I suppose you are right" she replied.
Opal gave her a hug. "Now, go find the Doc. I'm sure he is waiting for you"
"Thank you, Opal" She went and found Neil.
"I see you survived" Neil smirked at her and Adelaide rolled her eyes.
She looked around but didn't see Miss Alice or Christy. "Where's Simon, Neil?"
"Christy took Simon home" Neil told her. "I didn't think you would mind. He fell asleep so we didn't think he needed to eat again so soon"
"That should be fine- it's his bedtime, so he should last until I get home" She paused as they began to hear sounds coming from the cabin. Adelaide frowned.
"Really, already? They aren't wasting time" she said, the blush building again and Neil laughed heartedly at that frank statement.
"Well, in their perspective they did wait all that while they were dating and engaged" Neil pointed out. "If they did wait"
"Oh they did wait" Adelaide said and Neil looked at her, questioning.
"Ruby Mae was scared, poor girl" she clarified.
Neil pulled her closer to his side. "She'll survive. All women do. Sounds like she is doing just fine" he added, impishly.
"Oh my goodness, I can't believe you just said that" Adelaide whispered to him, her face flaming. "And I can't believe they are just doing it with everybody here. Isn't that awkward?"
Neil laughed harder. "Okay, let's go, lass, before you get too embarrassed" He put his arm around her shoulders. "We have to gradually rid you of your Victorian sensibilities"
They fell silent as they headed back to the mission.
"Are you alright?" he asked as they began to walk back to the mission. "I haven't seen you this quiet in a long time. It usually means something is bothering you"
"It just brought back some memories, that's all" she admitted. "Is that wrong?"
Neil pulled away from her and stopped her so he could look at her. "Why on earth would that be wrong?"
"I don't know how to explain it" she shrugged.
"I see" Neil reached out to touch her face, lightly. "It doesn't change what is happening between us. Of course, you thought of Simon. You had a wedding night with him, not me"
She blushed. "Neil"
"Well, you did, didn't you?" he laughed at her.
"Yes" she replied. "Of course" She began to walk, but Neil grabbed her arm and turned her around. He pulled her close to him and her heart quickened at being so near him. He kissed her forehead, softly.
She took a breath. "Neil" She wanted more from him so badly- the intensity between them had never been so strong as in that moment.
"Have you ever kissed anybody besides Simon, Adelaide?" he asked, his voice low as he traced the side of her face with his fingers.
"No" she nearly choked out, her stomach fluttering. Neil was so intense, strong, passionate- his presence always filled wherever he went. That intensity made her nervous at times-but in a good way.
"You nervous about this?" he asked as he moved his hand to touch her lips with his thumb.
She nodded, unable to say anything at the moment.
"Don't be" His voice was gentle. "Remember what I told you. Don't think. Just be here in this moment. And the rest will take care of itself"
He thumbed her cheek gently as his lips met hers for the first time, making her heart beat wildly. It was a sweet kiss, short, but full of promise. And it felt so incredibly right to her to be with him in this moment. He leaned back to look at her face and seeing her joy, he claimed her lips in another kiss- this one longer, but still considerably restrained. He was making good on his word to take things slow, but gave her a taste of how sweet they could be together.
"Are you thinking about him right now?" he asked her, with a hint of mischievousness, as he pulled back to look into her eyes.
"Um, no" she cleared her throat. "I hardly can think about anything coherent when you are this close to me"
Neil chuckled, his eyes shining with delight as they stared for a few moments at each other, lost in their moment.
She finally pulled away. "Point well taken, Neil, but you could have just told me that I was being ridiculous"
"Aye, but Adelaide, this way is much more fun" Neil teased. They began to walk, hand in hand, again. "But in all seriousness, Adelaide, I know you have your history with Simon and it's a part of who you are. This doesn't erase it. You just have to make room"
She nodded. "I did really miss you, Neil"
"I missed you too, lass" he told her, quietly.
"I think I'm going to need to have a conversation with Christy soon"
He sighed, squeezing her hand gently. "Probably a good idea"
She nodded and changed the subject, them finding joy in spending time together.
Christy sat on Adelaide's bed, tickling Simon's belly, Simon laughing and cooing for his Aunt.
"He loves his Aunt Christy" Addie smiled at her as she witnessed the sweet scene.
"I love him too, Addie. He is so sweet" She tickled him some more.
Adelaide took a breath. "I feel like we need to talk"
"I agree" Christy smiled at her. "Wait a second. I have something for you" She returned with a large envelope in her hand, which Adelaide stared at, trying to figure out what was going on.
"Now, I don't want you to be mad" she said, "I took it from Mr. Pentland the other day and have been waiting for the right time to talk to you about it"
Adelaide took the envelope from her outstretched hand and tore it open. Reading the papers, she looked up. "I don't quite understand…"
"I found your application while I was changing Simon one day and I mailed it in" Christy told her. "I knew you weren't going to do it, but I thought you should at least try. You had all the recommendations there and your testing from nursing school, but for some reason you just couldn't take that final leap and mail it. So I did it for you"
Adelaide continued to stare at the paper before Christy took it from her. "You got in. I knew you would. Why aren't you happy?"
Adelaide's stomach dropped. "I don't know what to say" she whispered. "I got into medical school?"
Christy smile faded. "It is your dream, right? Ever since you were a little girl- mama and daddy just prevented it, but nothing is holding you back now"
"Well, yes…" Adelaide bit her lip. "But I have Simon"
"I'm sure you could get someone to watch Simon" she told her. "You have enough money that Simon left you- plenty for medical school and then some"
She took a breath. "I just don't know what to say. This is huge."
"Is this about Neil?" Christy asked, quietly. "I know you are developing feelings…"
"They aren't developing, Christy" Adelaide replied softly. "They are already there. That's what I wanted to talk to you about"
"You love him?" Christy asked, her voice low.
She swallowed hard. "I…I think I could, if I don't already"
"I didn't realize you were that serious" Christy stared at her. "Are you willing to give up your dream for Neil?"
"I gave it up for Simon" Adelaide shrugged. "Although he would have encouraged me to do it if I had asked him. I just married him and didn't look back- I knew mother and father wouldn't have allowed it"
"He isn't a believer" Christy told her, quietly. "You are. It's a problem"
"It's only a problem, if I make it out to be" Adelaide responded. "I know you are right and you did the strong thing, but he is a good man- one that I want to be with"
"Then this is a blessing" Christy tapped the paper. "God knew that you couldn't break from Neil on your own, so he offered you this out. Isn't the Bible always talking about that?"
Adelaide rubbed her face. "Oh, Christy, I don't know. This has been my dream, but…" she shook her head. "I just don't know. I'm really conflicted about this"
"What will you do?" Christy asked.
Addie bit her lip. "Talk to Neil" she sighed. "And pray"
"I'm sorry, Addie. Truly" Christy said as she wrapped up Simon and picked him up. "I would have never wanted to cause you problems"
"Christy- if I choose Neil" Adelaide let the thought hang in the air and Christy responded, "I'll love you always. It's your choice"
She reached to hug her. "Thank you, sissy" she sighed.
She knew she owed it to herself to at least consider medical college as an option and she was proud that she was accepted. Yet, at the same time, it would close the door to what was happening with Neil. She knew that. But as much as part of her wanted to just throw out the letter, she couldn't keep this a secret from him. It was too big. She had to talk to him and that conversation was one that she dreaded.
A/N: Problems ahead? Would love to know what you all think—Ruby Mae's wedding was one of my favorite scenes from the book, so I wanted to include it here—and I couldn't pass up the opportunity for Neil to tease her about the shivaree…