Chapter 14

Emma took in the form before her. She wondered if she, herself, looked as pitiful.

In the soaked ground stood Regina, in jeans and a green "Storybrooke Soccer" sweatshirt that were both soaked through. They were obviously the first bits and easiest bits of clothing she could throw on - - Emma had never seen her in such casual attire.

Still, there was no mistaking the Mayor. Anyone else's brown eyes would have blended into the night, but Regina's were different. They always had been. They had always stood out from the background and forced Emma to recognize them, as they had at the mine and the coffee shop.

And the sidewalk and the soccer field.

And the dining room and the bedroom.

"Emma," said Regina, taking two steps forward into the drowning earth.

"I had told myself at the beginning… my beginning, the beginning you weren't even aware of… when I started loving you… that there would be nothing more painful than losing your love. And so I made a decision. I made a decision that you could never know my past, because if you did, you would stop loving me. And…"

Regina started choking on her words, tears falling heavier than the rain, now.

"And I'd rather you leave me and still love me, than know the truth and stop. That's why I wouldn't yield at the house and give in. I knew that once I opened my mouth and the truth came out, you would stop loving me. I can live without you as long as I have your love. But I can't live without you knowing I mean nothing to you anymore…"

She broke down.

Finally.

After months of hardness and insults, and then kisses and promises, Regina broke. She fell to the ground, her knees cushioned in mud and grass, and hung her head low. She clenched her fists and cried softly, her hopelessness consuming her.

Emma didn't know what to think. But she knew how she felt, and she couldn't let the woman she still loved bury herself here in the graveyard. So she found her strength and pushed herself up.

Her legs still worked, after all. Emma was surprised.

She walked over to the small, collapsed figure and then knelt in front of her. The rain pattered rhythmically into the dark earth, and the blonde's breath misted above both of them. Without thought, she wrapped her arms around Regina and covered her, trying to shield her from the omnipotent rain and cold.

Regina wasn't shaking, though. She hadn't been exposed to the elements as long as Emma had. The Sheriff felt movement and loosened her grip on the broken woman, staring down in observation.

Regina grabbed onto Emma tightly, her fingers gripping the blonde's leather jacket as if it were life itself. She swallowed hard and composed herself so that she could continue her admissions.

"But when you left, I started to forget who I was, who you had helped me become. And … my god Emma, I realized in that moment that you didn't just make me fall in love with you, but you helped me learn to love myself… and if you're not with me, I'm not sure I can. When you're not with me, I'm not someone I can love," she said, her voice becoming more steady.

Regina sniffled and cleared her throat.

"I'll be damned if I'm going to let my past mistakes steal away my future, Emma," she continued, now rising to stand.

Regina was back. She was confident and powerful again. Her eyes narrowed slightly and Emma found herself intoxicated once more, just as she had been the night she first returned Henry to the Mayor's care.

Emma followed Regina's ascent, her arms still wrapped around the woman.

Emma was now standing face to face with Regina. Both women blinked as rain fell from their eyelashes, and they both shook as lightning cracked in the sky. Emma felt strange, though, as if the storm were less powerful now… now that Regina was here.

"Regina, I know mistakes. I've dealt with them all my life. No matter how bad it was for you… I'm not going to leave. I just needed to know so that … so that I knew you felt that I was worth it. Does that make sense? I just needed to know I was worth it to you, because you're the only person I've ever wanted to really… love me," Emma said, her voice shaking throughout. The confession shook her from within and tears filled her eyes as the last words fell from her lips.

Never before had she had so much to lose.

"Then come here," said the brunette, leading Emma toward the shelter inside the Mausoleum.

Emma was confused as they stepped inside the dark and musty structure. Before she could ask any questions, Regina pressed against her father's concrete monument. To the Sheriff's surprise, it slid quite easily along the cold floor, revealing stairs that descended into darkness below.

Emma felt uneasy and nervous. "Regina, what is this?" she asked, feeling as if she were about to enter another world far more dangerous than Storybrooke.

"My past," said Regina quietly and reluctantly. The older woman took Emma's hand and squeezed it softly. "Do you still want to know it?" she asked in a tone that anticipated a negative response.

Emma's mind was, all of a sudden, filled with a flashback of the evening. She was in Henry's room and he was showing her his book for what seemed like the hundredth time. He pleaded with her to believe its contents and prophecy and she ruffled his hair as a compromise.

"Emma," Regina's voice brought her out of her recollection.

Emma stared up at Regina. It was dark and, in this setting, the brunette seemed to be but a shadow that belonged to the blackness around her. Emma's stomach stirred.

"If you still want to know, just take my hand," said Regina, in a voice so soft and clear that it could never belong to a shadow. Or the dark.

Emma was reassured and took Regina's hand. They descended the narrow steps into a four-walled chamber that contained what appeared to be drawers. It was colder here. Emma couldn't help thinking that this part of the building must be underground and surrounded by the undead. She turned to every wall, observing drawer after drawer and then, a single mirror mounted on one side of the room.

"Regina, what the hell is all this?" Emma managed to get out, as her mind teemed with a thousand questions.

The brunette stood in the doorway and blinked. She stared at Emma, and calmly said, "my mistakes, Emma. These are my mistakes."

"I don't get it," said a sincerely confused blonde, now visibly shaking from the cold.

Regina walked over and put her hands on either side of Emma's waist.

"Henry was never wrong," said the Mayor. "Everything he's told you… about me, and everyone else in this town has been true."

Emma narrowed her eyes and let a breathy laugh escape her lips. "Regina, seriously. If you're trying to lighten the mood, there are better ways to do it. Just tell me what all this is," she said.

Regina smiled a little… just a little… in a somber way. She reached up and dragged her thumb down Emma's jaw and leaned in to brush her rain-dampened lips against Emma's.

"There's no going back, Emma. And just in case this changes everything, I want one last memory…" she said in a whisper, leaning in and capturing the blonde's lips with her own. Emma, of course, couldn't resist. She had been craving nothing but Regina's touch ever since slamming the Mayor's door earlier in the evening. She tasted cider and felt sparks that she was sure had to be static electricity… otherwise there was no explanation. The Sheriff's hands immediately reached out for Regina's torso and pulled her in tightly, clinging to her soggy sweatshirt. She pressed her lips so forcefully against the brunette's, she was sure she would push her backward, but, steadfast the Mayor stood, unmoved.

Emma pulled back, exhaling warm air, now. She opened her eyes to find Regina staring at her, her eyes darker than she had ever before seen, and she wasn't sure if the change in hue was a result of lust or something else, something … darker.

Regina smiled. "Here goes nothin'," she said semi-playfully in an attempt to hide her insecurity. She closed her eyes and her eyebrows furrowed.

The drawers surrounding Emma begin sliding out from the walls, slowly, inch by inch, until they were fully exposed. Emma was startled by the sudden movement that had been prompted by no one.

"What the fuck is this?" she said nervously, her eyes darting from wall to wall, hesitant to actually peer inside one of the wooden boxes.

Regina walked over to the wall nearest Emma and reached into one of the drawers, her hand removing something dark. Emma couldn't move as she watched Regina's clenched fist come toward her, holding what looked like…

No, it couldn't be.

This had to be a joke.

Emma watched the heart in Regina's hand beat, as if it were still inside its owner's body. She was speechless. And horrified.

Regina bit her lip as a tear fell down her cheek. Upon seeing Emma's disgusted and unforgiving reaction, she placed the object back into its container, keeping her back to the blonde. She couldn't hold back her tears, now that she knew there was no absolution waiting for her across the room.

"I don't believe it. I just… can't," said a dumbfounded Emma.

Regina couldn't allow it. She had gone through too much tonight only to have Emma's incredulity keep her from real confession and honesty. There was only one thing left to do.

The brunette turned and grabbed Emma and led her to the Mirror.

"Emma, you have to understand. You have to believe it, otherwise this has all been for nothing," she pleaded, grabbing the blonde's hand and pressing it into the glass.

A bright light filled Emma's vision and she lost her equilibrium, or so it seemed. She felt as if she were dreaming, vivid scenes playing out before her. There was a lush landscape and a castle and … was that Mary Margaret? And David? They were walking hand in hand over a bridge, both wearing swords and clothing that looked like it had been bought at a Renaissance fair. And then there was Regina, in a black and red gown. Emma couldn't help but smile. And now, another man… an older man came to her and embraced her. Emma's smile dropped as Regina punched into his chest and tore out his heart. This scene faded into black, swirling clouds that swept around the castle she had already seen. Mary Margaret and David put a baby into a wardrobe. Then, Regina appeared above an injured Mary Margaret, laughing, and cursing her. Everything turned black, and Emma collapsed into Regina's arms.

"It's not just a story, Emma," said Regina, pain lacing every single word. "I was horrible. I was just so horrible," she said, before sobbing, her drowned body shaking with regret.

Emma blinked and realized she had fallen to the ground. Apparently Regina had caught her on the way down, and now both women sat on the floor, Emma wrapped in Regina's delicate and wet arms. The blonde was overwhelmed. She knew what she had seen was true, that it had happened. The mirror had the ability of proving truth through image and sensation, and Emma had felt every part of Regina's past in the minute she had touched the glass.

Now that she knew the truth, she had to figure out how to process it.

But despite the power of the images that had just been burned into her mind, the sound of Regina's cries consumed the blonde, taking precedent over everything else.

A long pause gripped the room as Regina's body shook with tears.

And after thought, and a sigh, Emma spoke.

"There is no revelation in the world that could make me stop loving you," she said, her voice so clear in the small, quiet room.

Regina's body stopped convulsing. "What?" she asked meekly, withdrawing her head from her hands.

Everything was clear to Emma now. She understood that Regina's rage had developed for hundreds of years before she came into this world with the rest of Storybrooke. She understood that Regina had destroyed lives in hopes of finding her own happiness. She understood that, at one point, the queen had lived without a heart of her own. Emma was going to be damned before she let her live that way again.

The blonde reached down and took Regina's hand in her own. It was colder than the concrete beneath them. Emma rubbed both of her own hands over it and stared down at Regina, who was now wide-eyed and waiting for Emma's response.

Regina watched as Emma lifted her hand and placed it on her chest, under her leather jacket, and above her heart. The Queen's fingers pulsed with the rhythm of the powerful and quickly beating organ inside. She moved her gaze up to Emma's face and saw her smiling confidently. Regina's fingers then grew warm.

"I know there was a time when may have reached inside me…" she pressed the brunette's hand hard against her chest and then continued, "and ripped this out."

Regina's mouth was dry, and now, even breathing was difficult. Her two worlds had just merged together and fate was but a few sentences away.

Emma stood up and pulled Regina along with her, keeping her hand on her chest. "But, Queen…Mayor Mills…Regina … whoever you are... you're the only reason it's beating at all right now."

"And that's all I need to know," Emma said, crying softly as the last words echoed through the room.

Regina had never before, in all her years, in either world, felt so powerful. Her body hummed all over in pardon and she straightened herself, standing tall. She kept her hand on Emma's chest and bent her fingers over it, scratching over Emma's t-shirt.

Emma leaned into Regina, her left hand lacing around the back of her neck. The Sheriff pulled Regina in and kissed her.. Their lips pressed against each other strongly, but gently, and Emma slipped her tongue into Regina's mouth, wanting to convey her sincerity through the most intimate passion. Regina moaned and felt Emma's right hand slide up her torso and to her left breast, where Emma's hand rested. The blonde wouldn't yield as she continued pulling on Regina's lips where she tasted the rain and release.

Emma finally pulled away and stared drunkenly at the woman before her, who, with her liberation, appeared now more powerful than ever. "My god, Regina. I know I've said it before, but… you have the strongest heartbeat," said Emma, smiling, before crashing back into the brunette, kissing her fiercely.

Regina relaxed into the kiss, knowing this time the curse would be undone. The consequences she could deal with, now that Emma knew… now that she loved all of her.

Eventually, the two women stopped kissing and looked around them. The walls were bare, the mirror gone.

Emma's brows dropped in confusion. "I guess I should get used to having questions now, huh?" she said, looking to an unsurprised Regina.

The Queen chuckled in her classic tone and raised her eyebrows. Though Emma knew her past, nothing had changed. Regina was still Regina… intimidating laugh and all.

"Let's get out of here," offered the brunette, offering her arm to the blonde. The two walked up the steps together and opened the doors of the mausoleum to step outside.

The sun was just rising above the trees, and a beam of warmth hit both women as they stood where it all began.