N/A: Welp it's been a while since the last update! I'm sorry guys I barely have time to breathe I swear. But here it is the next chapter :) I hope you enjoy and I'm sorry the angst but I'm a mess of feelings lately so you can realize that... pls review and I'll love you c:

Chapter 14: Silly girl

The next two weeks were endlessly torturing for Lauren, who could barely do anything more than walking to the bathroom and back to bed. Yes, she was now able to do a lot more of stuff, (pretty much everything that didn't include a lot of physical effort) but Julia was being an overprotective mom and just wanted her to recover in the best way it was possible. She found it adorable when it wasn't suffocating her. Even Lauren's dad traveled from Michigan one day to visit her, just to make sure her little girl was fine. He stayed a whole day with her; and she enjoyed it at its best, she had a really good relationship with his father. That cheered her up a lot, he brought some gluten free snacks he knew she loved, and he spoiled her a little too.

Julia had to go back to Chicago after her work in New York was finished, although she insisted she'd stay a little more if Lauren wanted her to, but the girl stated she could do perfectly fine on her own, that she had nothing to worry about and she wished her a good flight and said sorry for not being able to go with her to the airport when she left. The last time she remembered she went out of the house was to see Julia's show (and she could say she was proud of her friend, her hard work definitely paid off and anyone could realize that on the play), but unfortunately that meet up didn't do anything good to her self esteem. The fact of seeing a play putting up on the stage remembered her that she lost probably the biggest opportunity in her life. That night craved a huge nostalgic hole in her inside. Of course she pretended she was fine while Julia was there, she even stayed with the cast to help to get off the scenery and their stuff, despite they didn't want her to move because of her broken ribs. Then she and Julia went to the apartment and she finished packing all of her luggage, gave Lauren a long, tight hug, told her to call her if she needed anything, and headed to the airport. And Lauren felt a tight pain on her chest and wanted to cry.

She felt the urge to call Sebastian, for some reason she couldn't really express. He had called her a few times to see how she was doing; and he said it was such a pity she couldn't play the role because all of the others actresses were awful and nobody could do it better than her. His compliments were quite ironic having in mind how shitty he made her feel before. And he didn't even say he was sorry for playing with her all that time, even when their fight was mainly the reason of Lauren's accident. She realized he was a toxic person in her life. So instead of calling him, she decided to call Darren.

"Hey." She greeted shyly.

"Hi, Lo, what's up?" Darren replied.

"Um, nothing, actually." She said, and she felt like a stupid teenager calling to her platonic crush and then hanging up. "It's just that Julia went to the airport, and well, I'm kinda feeling lonely right now."

"Is everything okay? Do you want me to come over?" he asked kindly.

"Ern, no, I mean yes, everything is fine really. And well," she stuttered. Now she did sound like a stupid teenager. "it's not necessary, I mean, you're probably chilling with your girlfriend right now, and it's late, I- um…"

She heard Darren laughing through the phone. "I'll be there in ten minutes."

Before Lauren could object he really didn't have the need to come over, he already hung up. Her text message didn't stop him either. He was indeed, ten minutes later, at the front door of her apartment, with his big dumb smile and carelessly looks that gave away he haven't slept in several hours. She felt guilty for making him drive to her house after the sunset. She was perfectly fine, she didn't need him to babysitter her.

"No, you go back to your house and get some sleep!" She sentenced him, with a frown up her eyes and an accusing finger, but Darren just made his way into the inside of the apartment, passing her by.

"I have to warn you, Lopez," he said, completely ignoring her words, "I'm so hungry I could eat a horse, so you better have a big dinner for us."

She bit her lip. Like she was alone she thought to skip cooking that night. "I was actually thinking on calling a pizza."

"Sounds good." Darren cheered, walking to the couch and pretty much dropping his weight on it. He had a long day, so he left all his body just rested for a while. "How's that rib?"

She usually had been gotten better, but there were some days when the pain was beyond all bearing, and she just had to lie on bed and put ice on her chest all day. Darren had been coming over to the apartment every time she was having those kind of days (Julia was under oath to call him in those circumstances, and she knew he'd kill her if she didn't), he'd sit next to her on the bed and try to distract her talking or putting a movie on the TV. Luckily, she hadn't gotten those days since a week ago, so her improvement was now probably definitive.

"It's fine." She replied, sitting down on the little couch too, next to him; and started to dial the pizza's number, but when she was about to press the call button she felt Darren's eyes on her. She looked up, just to confirm her suspiciousness "What?"

"Lauren." Darren just called. He knew her too well.

"My rib is fine, I swear." She stated again.

"But?"

She sighed, rolling her eyes. There was no escape, he always knew when something was going down. "It's nothing, Darren, I'm just having way too much free time. I've been doing a lot of thinking, and nothing good can come out of it. About, you know…" she made a pause, taking some courage to finish her phrase. "This wasn't supposed to happen. New York was going to be a fan of adventures, and chances, and- I just felt like nothing of it happened."

She didn't need to explain herself more, Darren understood her perfectly. It was exactly what Julia was worried about; now that she was unemployed, but couldn't go back to Chicago neither (it'd imply a risk for her recovery), she felt stuck. She was a hard worker, she always needed to be busy and with something to do.

"Listen, Lauren," Darren started with his most sincere tone. "you're one of the most talented and humblest persons I've ever known. You're going to get a million of chances like that."

"You think?" Lauren asked, frowning a little bit her eyebrows. Broadway wasn't something people could offer you every year.

"I'm sure." He said. He sounded so sincere it was really easy to believe him, even if his words weren't real at all.

Lauren released a tiny smile, and patted him on his lap. "Thanks for coming, Dare."

For any other two persons, having that conversation and being the close friends they were would be completely impossible. Not only because it'd bring back the bad things such as fights, but mainly because of the good things. They've kissed, they've cuddled on the bed, they've made love; they've done so many intimate things that they changed the way they looked at each other. Other people would have just moved on and only say hi to each other when they occasionally met up on the street. But they couldn't; it was like if their love relationship made them even closer as friends. Now they knew exactly what was the other thinking without saying a single word, they knew their skills and their weakness, and awkward silences didn't exist between them anymore.

Lauren called the pizza (especially gluten free for her), and even though she tried to pay it herself, Darren insisted and ended up giving the money to the pizza boy. When the couch ended up being too small for both of them, they walked to Lauren's room and threw themselves on her bed to watch TV. They didn't find weird or a sex-related activity just to chill and cuddle in bed; now they were, after all, friends.

"Hey, what time is it?" Darren asked.

"It's almost ten pm." She answered, glancing at her clock on the bedside table. "Why?"

Lauren frowned when observed the grin that showed up on his face, looking at her. Then he grabbed the control remote and changed the TV to a music channel. She didn't understand why he did that in first instance, but then…

"You've got to be kidding me!" Her jaw dropped, as she punched with excitement on the arm.

A few guitar chords sounded through the television speakers, as a street in black and white came on the screen. Five seconds later, she saw herself walking through that path; she could barely recognize herself. A few seconds later, the band started playing and she couldn't help but to smile when Darren appeared making his very usual face expressions he adopted when he sang.

"Aw, look at that. That's us!" She cheered; and Darren laughed because he found the tone of her voice nothing but adorable.

She messed with him as long as the music video lasted. It was the first time she saw it outside the studio.

She'd whisper "damn" every time they showed any good angle of his figure, and clap every time they showed her. She bit her lip between the last seconds, when you could see how his silhouette (you couldn't really tell it was him, but she knew it) wrapped an arm around her and pulled her closer. She completely forgot about that. Things were different when that video was filmed. That was the day when he asked her if he wanted to move with her to LA. And she said yes. What would've happened if they followed their promises?

She'd be on the bed of his apartment, probably waiting for him to come back from work? She wondered what he'd do when he came back after a long day without seeing her. Would he sneak into the bedroom with the lights off, give her a slow, long kiss, before resting his head on her neck and cuddling very close until they fell asleep? Or would he rush his walk to jump onto the bed, rip off her clothes and fuck her hard until she couldn't even remember her own name?

None of them were possible now.

She turned her head to him, only to find his eyes were already looking for hers. She missed being the way they used to be.

"So… after the wedding…" Lauren started, her voice sounded so weak it was hardly a whisper. "are you planning to stay in New York or to go back to LA?"

"Well, I've thought about staying here, actually." He replied, and he didn't sound a lot louder than her either. "But, I have to shoot in Los Angeles, so…"

Lauren nodded in response, understanding his intention. However, she wouldn't stay in New York either, but Los Angeles? That was damn far. She got used to see him daily; but she told herself she needed to understand he was going to commit to a serious lifelong relationship and he was going to form a family, and things between them would never be the same. For example, they wouldn't be able to cuddle as close to each other as they were right now. She couldn't call him whenever she wanted just because she was feeling a little down. He wouldn't drive to her house anytime to eat pizza and watch TV. That just couldn't happen anymore. She had to understand that after the next weekend, the priorities in his life would be different. And they wouldn't involve her.

"Lauren," Darren called lowly, interrupting her internal debate. He had been thinking about that a lot lately. "are you going to the wedding?"

Lauren's reply wasn't immediate.

Did she want to go? Of course didn't. She didn't know how she was supposed to stand Darren confessing his love for another person. Not after their history. But she couldn't keep blaming on him because they couldn't work things out in their time; she had to move on. She had to forgive him, and that implied accepting his happiness. And if that made him happy, she'd have be there to support him. Even if it killed her inside.

"Do you want me to go?" she finally said.

"Of course I want you to. It wouldn't be the same if you weren't there. But I understand if you don't want to." Darren avoided her eyes while he said that sentence, pretending he was watching the TV commercials.

Suddenly, Lauren avoided his eyes too. They were having such a nice time, and suddenly, everything changed in front of her eyes. "Then of course I'll go, silly." She stated, as if she found funny he asked her that, when she actually didn't.

She quickly stood up and, pretending she felt the sudden urge to take the clothes that were messily spread all over the room and put them in her wardrobe.

"It's really late." Lauren announced, walking from a point of the room to the other, without facing him. "You should go." She added, folding a dress and turned back to him (She didn't want him to see her face).

Darren looked down. She was kicking him out. "Fine." He replied, standing up. "See you later." He just said, passing by her and barely looking at her when did it so. She realized he was offended; but she didn't say goodbye, she just bit her lip and stared to the nowhere until she heard the door shut.

Then a silent, almost impossible to hear sob shook slightly her body, and she whipped a tear with her thumb; trying to pretend it didn't hurt so bad, but the pain on her chest would roughly allow her to breath. And she repeated to herself.

Silly girl, what made you think, the boy who doesn't care about anything, would care about you?

"It's just regular pre wedding panicking because you're a wuss." A voice stated next to the curtain of the fitting room.

"What if being a wuss makes me run away in between a week?" Darren asked, stepping out of the dressing room. He walked though the hall until he was in front of the long tall mirror.

"I'm your groomsman and I'm here to prevent that." Brian replied as the good friend he was. He didn't want to be all behind Joey and Joe, so he also flied to New York that week and he was staying in a hotel until they went to San Francisco on Friday.

"Thanks, pal. I appreciate that. Lock all the doors that are to my reach." He stood up to the front, and then to the sides, checking how the suit fitted him. "This is the one, right?"

"It's definitely this one." He agreed.

After fifteen minutes, they finally found his suit. Luckily, picking a costume for guys wasn't that difficult as for girls, especially in this occasion. So Brian announced to Darren that Mia was waiting for him in the dressmaker room; because she thought she might have found the dress but she wanted his opinion first. So Darren changed his clothes again and they headed to the dressmaker's place.

"Can I even do this? Isn't bad luck or something?" Darren asked, when they were waiting for the girl to come out from the room.

"Don't be an old fashioned, Darren." His friend replied. "If something brings you bad luck, is to go to Las Vegas and marry a stripper, which never" he clarified "happened to me. Or to invite an ex to the wedding. But that's not going to happen to you." He assured, and Darren slowly swallowed a thick bitter gulp.

His fiancé walked out of the dressing room in a matter of minutes. Darren's heart stopped for a few seconds. The long, white dress was pretty much perfect for her; she looked stunning. But seeing her dressed like that just made him picture the situation. He was standing there, and she was walking to the altar and he was committing herself to marry her for the rest of his life. He could feel he was starting to sweat as something tied tightly around his chest, not allowing him to breathe correctly. He had been wishing and rushing that moment so much, why did he want to step back right now?

"You look beautiful." He said to her, trying to act normal. She smiled widely, to confirm that was definitely her wedding dress.

And it was true. She did. He just didn't know if she should waste that beautiful dress for someone who didn't worth it.

"What is so urgent, you silly goose?" Lauren asked, sitting down and quickly brushing her hair, still wet why she just got out of the shower. Julia had texted her to skype with her as soon as she could, not saying what could possibly be so important.

"Hey, listen." The little Julia on the screen of her laptop said. "Mia just called me."

"…Okay." Lauren frowned. She didn't know where was that going, but it couldn't be any good.

"She invited us to her bachelorette party this Thursday."

"Oh." That was Lauren's initial response. The wedding was now just a week ahead. It was Sunday, the bachelorette was on Thursday and the wedding the next Saturday. She had the invitation to that ceremony hidden in the book she hated the most, under a pile of boxes in the kitchen. But she did remember it very well where it was hidden. How could it be that close? She just realized.

"Does that mean a yes?"

That's when Lauren actually thought of the bachelorette. She was just thinking about the approaching date of the wedding.

"Nu-uh." She finally replied. "That's not going to happen."

"Come on, Lo…" Julia started, but Lauren was faster.

"No way, Julia! She hardly knows who I am. We are not friends. It'd be super awkward." She said with a grossed out face. She could already picture it. All of them would be having fun and she would feel totally left out.

"All the girls are going. Meredith is going. Jaime is going. I am going. Are you going to miss out? Come on, it's going to be fun." She kept trying to convince her, but Lauren wouldn't see that happening.

"It's going really to ruin the night when I kill myself." Lauren stated, and Julia gave her a killer glance.

The conversation kept going for a while; but they didn't get to any kind of agreement. Lauren even used the excuse of her broken rib for not going (She was not proud of doing it so though), and the conversation ended with a dry cold "talk to you later". She felt kind of guilty after Julia's silhouette disappeared from the screen. Julia, her friends or even Mia, none of them were to blame for her incredibly denying to go. But how could she explain it to them? They had to live it, they had to share her own skin to know what it felt. It was something chemical; she couldn't feel comfortable in the same room with her when not a long ago she was her fiancée's other woman, and she had absolutely no idea.

JoMo called her later that day to meet up at his house. She hadn't been feeling really good after the accident to be messing around, but now she felt good enough to have a little fun. She had been able to stop taking her pain pills, so she could drink a bit if she wanted to; it wasn't in her plans though.

When she walked into JoMo's place that night, she noted most of them were being a little exaggerated at first instance. They kept checking on her and asking if she felt good, and they always had that worried look on their faces and that sweet (but sort of annoying) concerned tone of voice. Yes, she had been through something pretty bad, but she was fine now and she didn't like having everyone babysitting her. Luckily for her, after a few hours they went back to normality and treated her as the usual. The only one who kept constantly checking on her was Darren, but she could stand that.

"Tell me if you want me to drive you to the apartment." He whispered, as he leaned over to take one of the packets of Chinese food they ordered. He was on the arm of the couch she was sitting on.

Lauren nodded. He would keep insisting if she said no. "I'll let you know when."

Walker was in one of his usual trips to New York; sitting down on the couch next to Sarah. He'd occasionally lean his head to her ear to whisper something, she'd blush and giggle shyly. And her poor brother, too busy hosting the guests, didn't imagine a thing.

Joey was also there. He was staying for that whole week with Darren and Liam, mostly to discharge his best man's chores. His other groomsmen were Walker, Brian and Liam. The wedding was obviously one of the most debated subjects that night. Walker announced that he thought marriage would slave him forever, but if he was happy with his own castration, then he was too. But the actual important talk came on later.

"However, my most important chore is, because I know Joey would do a terrible job, the bachelor party." Walker said.

"Why would I do a terribly job?" Joey asked, highly offended, he even put down his Chinese food.

Joe raised his eyebrows. "Do you know about any stripper?"

"Well-" he stuttered.

"What's Darren's favorite drink? Should we call a whore?" He kept going, not giving Joey time to answer. "How exactly gross should the party be in a rank from 1 to ten?"

"Okay, you win." Joey gave up. "When it comes to alcohol and activities that degrade woman, you're the best."

"All I ask for is that recognition, thanks." He answered humbly. "But honestly, this Thursday will be the best night of your life, Darren, I will take care of that."

"I thought the wedding was supposed to be the best night of his life." Sarah commented, joking, as she stood up to go to the bathroom.

"Please." Joe snorted, finding her incredibly amateur attitude just amusing. "I'm being totally serious. I called the best stripper of New York, if it's not the best in the USA." He acclaimed, sounding amazingly proud of himself. Darren just laughed; well he didn't find his bachelor party exciting at all, but he might be a little curious about it now.

"Oh, I want to go!" Lauren cheered, more excited than Darren himself. But the response was nothing more than a loudly laugh from the guys. "What?" she frowned, not understanding why could that be so funny.

"I don't know if you've noticed this, Lauren," JoMo said "but you are a girl."

"So what?" She replied sassily, "Am I being bullied for not having a penis?"

"No, you go to the bachelorette party and show pennies down a guy's asshole and woo like a cow or whatever you girls do. This is a men thing." Joe explained, he obviously thought of that night as an important sacred ritual.

Lauren raised one eyebrow, before giving a sassy reply. "I'm here to support Darren, not to shove pennies down anybody's asshole. Does it bother you that I go?" she asked now to Darren, who just shrugged.

"It's fine." He simply answered.

"Oh, no, no, it's not." Walker interrupted, completely scandalized. He wouldn't allow anyone ruin the big boys' nite. "Darren's opinion doesn't count."

"Hey!" he tried to defend himself.

"If you are not a stripper, you can't go." He finished, giving his final judgment, and pointing at her with his Chinese food stick.

Lauren then shrugged, stirring her food. "If you give me two tequila shots I might make out with the stripper."

She may not had a penis, but she knew that guys couldn't just skip that one. They were, after all, guys. Indeed, there was a silence in the room after her comment, which just glorified her victory. Joe sighed, defeated, and ran his hand through his hair.

"You'll better fulfill your promise or you'll have to be the stripper."

Lauren laughed. "Fine. Shit." Then she added, when she realized what she was committing to do.

"Are you sure you want to go?" Darren asked her lowly, as the conversation moved quickly back to the stripper's matter.

"Yeah, I do." She replied. "I feel kinda left out for not being a groomsman here." She joked. It was partly true though, the bridesmaids were Mia's friends so she wasn't playing any important part in the ceremony.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know that." Darren apologized. Honestly, he'd have choose her to be his Maid of honor, because she was one of the most important persons in his life; but he didn't asked her to because just at the mention of the wedding, she instantly turned really uncomfortable and avoided talking about it.

"It's okay." She said, and it was true in a part. She preferred to stab herself with a fork before giving a speech in his weeding. "My place in this important date will be to make out with your stripper. And also your wedding gift. And your birthday gift for next year. Happy birthday!" she messed, before taking a sip of her glass of water.

Just six days, six days before she'll see him providing his bows with another woman, for the rest of the eternity. And nothing she could do about besides biting her lip and cheering.

She looked down fast enough so he wouldn't see how her smile faded away. And she once thought that could be her?

Silly girl.