Hi Jack its Shawn,

So right now our father is god knows where chasing my mother. I've been staying at best friend Cory's house for three weeks. I like Cory's family, but I can't take living with them. See, I really didn't grow up with a lot rules and stuff like that. When your parents spent a lot of time bars and don't really pay attention to you, you don't see them parents. You know I mean? Cory's brother, Eric is going crazy over his SAT's (I hear you're the same age as him so you must be going though it too, uh?). Anyway Eric has become a pain my ass, he has been on and on about his lucky pencil, his lucky towel, and his lucky air. And I'm thankful that Cory's parents took me in and all, but they are getting on nerves. I can't eat ice cream for breakfast, because it's not healthy. I can't drink out of the carton, because it's not sanitary. I can't clip my toes nails at dinner, because it's not proper. The only good thing is that every night Cory lies in bed with me. We talk (he's a really good listener) and we fall asleep together. I know Eric sees us but I guess he doesn't mention it because he feels sorry for me. Anyway, how are you? I would really like hear about you.

I dropped the letter into the mailbox as Cory and I headed off to school.

"I'm sure he'll write back, you're brothers" Cory tried to reassure me.

"I don't know Cor, he has never written back before."

At school Turner was concisely asking how I was doing, and I of course I put on fake smile smirked "I'm fine." I found myself sitting in my classes noticing that Cory and Topanga were…were flirting. She was staring at him, smiling at him, and laughing at his jokes. He was doing it too. He was telling her she looked nice and helping her gather her books. I looked down and tried to ignore it.

Turner's voice snapped me out of my daze; "Hunter" He called me as everybody was leaving.

"What?" I groaned.

"How are you doing?"

"I'm fi…"

"Hunter, I don't give me anymore of that 'I'm fine' crap"

I dropped my bag on Topanga's desk. "Honest?"

He nodded "Honest"

"I'm grateful for the Matthews and all, but they're…" I took a breath, "they're just such a family. I mean even my family, wasn't that family enough. You know?" I didn't understand why I was saying this to him, but I was.

He nodded, "I get it. The Matthews are good family so good that's sort of little annoying huh?"

I laughed, "Yea"

"Well you're welcome to call me anytime you need a break or something."

"I know, you already told me that." I rolled up my eyes grabbed my bag and raced out of the room.

That night I stared out the window listen to the sounds of barking. It was the dog that wandered around Cory's street.

Stray dogs howl free in moonlight.

They enjoy being wild in the dark, for it is the cage that scars them.

I think of myself as stray with less hair.

I know it wasn't great. I was thinking on top of my teenage head.

"Shawn? Is that the dog?" Cory yawned as the got out of bed.

"It's a very, cool dog." I whispered gazing at the furry brown terrier. "I see it down the corner. No leash. No collar. He's just having a great time barking at the moon."

Cory rubbed his eyes, "It's a stray, he's barking because he's doesn't have a home."

"He doesn't need a home."

"Yes he does, that's what he's saying." He laughed then howled, "I need a hoomme"

He smiled, "You're not hearing him right. He's happy out there because he's free. No one rubbing his nose in a carpet and saying don't do that."

Cory yawned, "He looks lonely to me and cold, and like he doesn't have a friend in the world."

I got up and opened the window.

Cory jumped, "What are you doing?"

"I gotta get out Cor."

"But we have a curfew"

I growled "I don't do curfews. I don't do bedtimes. I don't do families."

"But my parents…"

"I didn't ask to live here." I yelled.

"What do I say to my parents?"

"Tell them I took my self out for a walk." I smirked as I climbed out the window and down the tree.

I thought I'd just walk around until I got tired then sleep at a park or something. I didn't have plan or any clue. I just walked around town thinking to myself. I thought of the stars, the streetlights, and the people rushing around.

Then I heard someone yelled, "Shawn"

I turned around to see Eddie holding a can of spray paint.

"Hey little bro?"

"I thought you were locked up…"

"Yea I was. But I got out, my own special way of course." He smirked and looked over at the rest of his gang spray painting some building (it was too dark to see what it was).

"So you want to have some fun?" He chuckled waving the can in my face.

"I don't think so" I mumbled walking a few steps away.

"Faggot" Eddie yelled.

I lost my breath. "What?" I almost cried.

Then another voice called me out. I turned around to see Harley.

Eddie smiled, "My good friend Harley here told me that you like dick. What a disgrace you are to the Hunter name."

I felt my throat tighten. I wanted to breakdown and cry. But instead I did what I did best cover up, "That's not true. I'm not a fa...guh" I couldn't say even say it.

"Faggot!" Harley corrected me.

Eddie devilishly chuckled again, "Well you should do response to it."

I slammed my foot against the ground, "That word means nothing to me."

Eddie and Harley turned to each other nodded and smiled.

Harley tossed me a paint can, "prove it"

I didn't feel right about this. "What?"

"We dare you to spray Faggot on that wall." Harley commanded motioning to the guys leaning against the already vandalized building. All of them were now staring at me too.

I felt like darkness was closing in on me. I thought about making a run for it. I was thinking that I should have run back to the light of the Matthews' house.

"If you're not a fag then should have no problem with this." Eddie smirked.

I was once again presented with a choice. The right choice would be to run away back the house and let everybody forget about this. But of course being in my natural environment of darkness and crime I was destined to make the wrong choice. I walked toward the building with the can shaking in my hand. As I held up the can to the wall they chatted "Do it, Do it".

"I'm not" I screamed as sprayed the F in red paint. I sprayed the red paint feeling as if it were my blood.

As I paint the wall I bleed. For I'm stabbing myself, for what I am. I paint as I try to bleed it out.

I manage to hold back the tears as I painted the G. The gang was yelling, "Fag, fag."

"I'm not" I screamed over and over again until I crossed the T.

I stared at it. "FAGGOT" is big red letters. "There, y'all happy now?"

Eddie and Harley smiled and nodded impressed, "I guess, we were wrong about you" Harley chuckled.

Then we heard cops coming. Naturally it was now everyman for himself. I dropped the can and ran. I ran like I should have run before. However I wasn't fast enough and the police caught me.

The cop shine his flashed light on my now tear soaked face.

"How old are you?"

"14" I cried.

He bit his lip then whispered, "Come on"

"Am I going to jail?" I inquired.

He smiled, "No, nobody got hurt. And don't think you're the leader, right?"

"No" I said as was climbed into the police car. I started to feel a little better and very relieved.

"Well I still have to tell your parents."

"My parents?"

"Yea, what is your address?"

I panicked so I lied, "Um, my parents are out-of-town…called out of town to…to save a baby…that fell down a blowhole."

I don't know what why I thought of that. I knew form the second it came that only a complete idiot would believe that.

He raised an eyebrow, "Okay? Then are you saying at friend's house or something?"

I knew I couldn't back to Cory's house now. I knew that his parents would give me hell.

"Hello?" the cop snapped.

Then I noticed Turner's apartment was near.

Turner looked annoyed seeing me at his door.

"Hunter, this really isn't a good time."

"You're telling me" I said as the cop stepped up beside me.

"He's a cop"

Turner's face was a mixture of shock and anger.

"Do you know this kid?" The copper asked.

Turner nodded, "Yea, I'm his teacher. Officer, Can you tell me what this is all about?"

The cop told Turner.

"Spray paint?" Turner barked.

"No, we were to sell them to bad kids…and over charge them?" I nervously lied.

The officer rolled his eyes, "He said he staying with you?"

Turner stared at me silent for a minute then finally nodded, "Yea, he is. His folks are out of town."

The cop nodded, "Okay then, Sorry to bother you Mrs. Turner."

Then I saw Ms. Tomkins sitting on his couch, as the officer left.

"Mrs. Turner? Congrats" I laughed walking up to her.

"No, it is still Ms. Tomkins" he mumbled bitterly grabbing her coat and started moving toward the door.

"Good night Cat" Turner said in a sort of a begging tone.

"Good luck John." She sadly wished give him a peck on the cheek before leaving.

I started to leave too until Turner grabbed by my collar.

"Stay" he growled.

"But she got to go"

"Well I got more to say to you"

"Thanks for covering for me. Cory's folk would have freaked if I had showed up with that cop."

"Like this would they yelled you like this?" Turner voice thundered.

I laughed it off, "Yea, that's pretty good"

"Would they have told how stupid you are for being out so late." He yelled again.

"Okay, I get it" I groaned not wanting a lecture.

"I don't think you do." He hollered again.

"Then I'll get out of your way. I though you cool" I yelled back heading toward the door.

"Well I'm not cool when I see someone I care about brought home by cops." He demanded.

I stopped moving, "Look I'm sorry I messed up your night."

"Don't worry about that, I already messed it up" he smirked as he sat down on the couch.

I chucked a little as I sat down to him, "Yea women"

"What do you know about women?" He smirked.

"What do you want to know?" I laughed.

"You think you could help me Hunter?"

"Hey you helped me"

"See why can't you be this sharp in class."

"Math is not my best subject"

"I'm your English teacher"

"Then why are you teaching math?"

"Are you kidding me?"

I nodded and we both laughed.

The next morning Turner drove me to the Matthews. Neither of us really knew what was going to happen. Turner said he would talk to them, and I wanted to see Cory and get my things. Turner made a decision not to tell the Matthews about the cop and I made a decision not to tell to Cory anything about it.

As soon as we got there, Cory and I head off to his room, Cory starting mothering. "Where were you? Do you know worried I was?"

Then I tossed my hair back and Cory giggled, "Sorry Cor"

"That's alright" he giggled again.

I look over at the door, "You know they're talking about me Cor."

He nodded.

"I gotta know what they're saying" I commanded as ran out Cory following me.

"Chet have you found you wife yet" I heard Mrs. Matthews say.

I looked in the kitchen to realize my dad was on speaker phone.

"No but I found the motor home." He said.

"Chet don't you think it's time for to come there and take some responsibly." Mr. Matthews yelled.

"I wish I could but I'm no good without my Virna."

Mr. Matthews put his coffee down, "Chet, Shawn is having a hard time. I don't think it's fair to Shawn or to us to have this open-ended commitment"

Fair to us? I thought. So I am a bother to them. They just only say it behind my back I guessed.

"I know Alan, but the boy needs somebody."

"If you're not coming back, then you need to be the one to tell your son."

"I just did." Dad laughed "If I know my boy when adults are talking about him he's behind them listening."

They finally turned around to face me.

"Hey there son" Dad called out.

"None of you want me." I started to holler "Well that's fine because I don't need any of you. I don't need anybody." I screamed and starting running through the house. I ran to the window and didn't stop. Cory was pleading and telling me to stop, but I climbed out and down. When my feet hit the ground I looked up to see Turner.

"I'm not in class I don't have to listen to you." I sassed.

"Where are you going?" Turner called me out.

"What do you care?" I smirked.

"I was beginning to think I care about anything." He explained.

"Whatever" I mumbled and started to walk away.

"I've been here. Someone reaches out to you. It's easy to run." He screamed.

"Look I'm sure you got a lot of problems, but I just need a place to sleep." I stomped.

He stared at me then smiled, "How about I give you a home?"

"What?" I asked.

"My place" He nodded.

I felt this was too good to be true, "For how long? Three weeks and then get sick of me."

"Oh I'm sick of now Hunter, but I'm still making the offer." He smirked.

"Why?" I mumbled again.

"Because I think I need that" He whispered.

"You are not gotta tell me what to do" I stomped.

"Someone has to" He smirked quickly.

"You're not my dad"

"I'm not trying to be. I'm just offering you a roof and window to climbed out of…though it is five stories up"

We both chuckled then shook hands.

"Oh my god" I heard Cory scream as he fell from the tree.

"That is harder than looks" He said getting back on his feet.

We laughed as Turner left to go talk to the Matthews.

"So you're moving in with Turner?" Cory asked.

"You heard?"

"Well I stuck up there for a while. I had to wait until a squirrel lost interest." He laughed.

"Cory your folks are great but this seems right."

He gave me that cute smile, "I'll have my mom and dad put in a doggie door for you."

I couldn't help to laugh, "Just leave the window your open."

That night I sat by the window my new bedroom at Turner's apartment staring at stars in sky. My dad wasn't coming back. My mom wasn't coming back. And I'm now living with my teacher. There were a lot of mixed emotions. My mind battled if this was a good thing or a bad thing. My dad wasn't there to beat me anymore, yet my mom wasn't there to cover up the scars. Turner was a cool guy, yet he was also a hard ass teacher. My relationship with Cory had growth stronger, yet I was lying to him. I took out my notebook and looked back at the night sky.

As the stars meets my eyes I start to wonder something.

Are stars the lights trying to peek through the dark night?

Or are stars more like tiny bullet holes though a blacken heart?

This an unanswered question, for the stars disappear before we wake.

And the stars are too far away to ask.