LPOV

I woke up in my man's arms, just where I wanted to stay forever. I slowly got up from the bed and made my way clumsily to the bathroom. I never wanted Ashton to see me like that ever again. He should never have to. I was careful not to cry when I looked into the mirror and saw my bloated swollen face, remembering what had made it this way. I turned the shower on and broke down. It was loud enough that Ashton could not hear the sobs racking my body. I curled up on the floor of my shower and pretended to melt away with the water flowing down the drain. Unfortunately I couldn't hear anything outside of the shower and eventually Ashton figured it out. He stepped into the shower fully clothed and wrapped his arms around me waiting till the sobs subsided. He dried me off with a towel while I was still hiccupping. He dressed me in my favorite sweats and the slippers Ean had given me. He stayed by my side until I fell asleep from exhaustion. I was dreaming of the life my babies and me would have had when I felt his cool arms detangle from my body. He got up and went to the door where my grandpa stood.

"Is she sleeping?" Grandpa asked. Ashton nodded his head.

"Yes, I'm worried that something might be wrong," he explained, "This morning I found her curled up in the shower letting it run cold. It's like she doesn't care what happens to her anymore. It scares me."

"These are just symptoms that come with a traumatic event," Carlisle assured.

"Well, if this keeps up you'll need to do something about it," Ashton said.

"I know, but right now my main concern is removing the fetus'" my heart did a flop in my chest and I reflexively put a hand over my stomach.

"How?" Ashton questioned incredulously.

"Well…actually I'm not sure yet, but if push comes to shove, we'll have to put her under for it," Carlisle explained, I could tell this pained him from the strain in his voice, he had always been the reasonable one and was just trying to do what was best, but I could tell he really didn't want to.

"I see," Ashton said, with his own discontent, "I'll talk to her." He closed the door and returned to my side cuddling in where he was previously. I stayed like that for as long as I could bear to keep my mouth shut.

"I heard you two talking, you know?" I finally broke the silence.

He sighed, "I guessed that much, it's only for your safety that we do this."

I looked at my crossed fingers, "I know."

He kissed my forehead softly and looked into my blank eyes. His expression turned to one of pain, and he if he could have cried, he would have. I smoothed his hair and laid my forehead against his.

"It's going to be okay." I promised.

We laid there in mournful silence until two quick raps at the door startled us. I reluctantly got up from my bed and opened it to find a very solemn Emmett. He didn't say one word, instead enveloped me in a bone crushing hug. He broke down on the floor with me in his arms in tearless sobs, racking both of our bodies with it. I grabbed his shoulders and shook him a little.

"Emmett, I hold you in no way responsible, you hear?" I gently said.

He shook his head a little, "its all my fault, if I wasn't such a spaz, this wouldn't be happening right now."

"I think it would have happened anyway, in some way, somethings telling me it wasn't the right time." I realized. He hugged me tighter, the burden seeming a little lighter.

Three Days Later

The babies had been removed the day before yesterday and the funeral was today. Esme felt that it was the right thing to do. I did too. It had been a mournful three days and for the most part silent. The family never laughed together like we used to and everyone stayed locked up in their rooms. I was still resting from the surgery but probably mostly sulking. Rosalie had been the most cryptic, she stayed locked in her room only to come out if asked for, when she did emerge, she was a mess. Her hair uncombed, clothes unchanged, teeth unbrushed, out of all of us she cared the most about her appearance and now it was like nothing. I could understand where she was coming from, she was finally getting her dream come true a baby to call her own, and it was ripped from her just like it was ripped from my womb. We all knew what children meant to Rose so we didn't ask questions, just let her grieve. I was curling my hair when Ashton came in and wrapped his arms around me.

"You look beautiful," he complimented, smiling, not quite touching his eyes.

"Thanks, I try," was my lame attempt at humor.

The rest of the day followed dreary, and mournful like the previous three. At the end of it all I crawled in under my covers to find solice in the love of my life, laying my wet, hot, tear-stained face on his smooth cold chest. There I fell asleep hoping for a brighter more hopeful day.

It has taken forever to get this one out because when I was typing it I couldn't think of the words. Its been erased and typed a million times or so. It was also a sadder part which always seem to drag. Please review, i need at least 10 to continue...it's your choice.