How To Be Heartbreaker: Chapter 14: I'm a Mess

A/N: I decided to switch up things, this chapter is in first person, and line breaks will indicate it switching from person to person.

It's been the first time in weeks I've gotten out of the impeccable cage that is my house. However, it never really did feel like home. It's lack of human life and emotion is an uncomfortable sight to behold. Lately I've told myself "I've been living a lie." Did I act certain ways because of my erased, trauma-induced memories? Was she really the person who withheld those memories...is it bad all my experiences with her are coming back to me in violent flashbacks; leaving stunned for hours. Why had she came back to me with such...malicious intentions? Intentions she had to apparently shatter me to pieces.

I refused to believe that she'd do such things to me, my heart ached for her, and no matter the situation it's simply how it is. It stings, the way she was trying to play me, then how she escapes...completely and utterly frightful. I want to chase after her, grab ahold of her, but Marron Chestnut was out of reach. As I would try and extend my hand out for her, the image of Marron would dissolve right in my eyes. The odd sense of deja vu, it was intense and I knew exactly why.

When spiritually, I wasn't with my body way back when, I often remembered someone I'd try to reach for. But...never would I have remembered it was Marron. So very strange that my memory itself refuses to recall the blonde in the endless photographs with Goten...and how, Goten himself didn't recognize her...why wasn't there any inclination to even ask?

Was this all a dream? Have I been asleep, living my life to how I want...then came Marron to finally came to awake me from the seemingly endless dream I simply can not snap out of? It's all a very overwhelming, consuming feeling that swells inside me. It crushes me inside out, my heart pounding.

I want her. Her comfort, her touch was what I crave; but such things are implausible. The all-too consuming want – no – need showed how idiotic my actions of the past have been. Where was this ego people speak of gone? Why couldn't I get up and run after her, change her mind? Why isn't anything going in my favor?

I think it's the universe. Its trying to tell me she's toxic, pursuing her would lead me to no good.

But pursuing her was precisely what my entire body screamed for.

At first things were simply games between two human beings. No harm done. However...things have certainly spun on the dial, this was no child's play anymore, and I for certain am not standing for this. I know her, and I know how she is. I know she felt something that night, which was intense mutuality amongst the two of us. I'm not one to say such things either… I know that for certain.

My head was sailing high, my heart beating rapidly. Would he set me free? His intensity devoured me. I didn't understand how such things could happen to begin with; no person has made me feel so damn conflicted. I was scared to let him have the key to my metallic, steel heart. I felt like he found his way through it, jackhammering till the silver metal heart shattered by completion. I wanted to be near him, but I wanted to run, run from the city. I felt on the verge of pure sanity.

I was going to crash, chasing relentlessly to nothing.

If this is true insanity, why is my mind clearer than ever? I'm going to fall back to him, drown in the person he was if I didn't run. But why were my legs refusing to move, why are my muscles failing me? Why aren't things like before, when I can run without emotion or guilt?

Trunks Briefs has made me insane, as I could no longer run and this, this entire overwhelming situation I'm in isn't just a damn game. This isn't about conquering one another, neither is it about a revenge-ridden motive. I'm scared...to admit that I might be in-love. However, how will I ever trust the person who did such an impact to me...or is this just a part of his game?

Is this to break my heart once again?

I want to take her into my arms, apologize for my sheer stupidity. But, how will I ever do such a thing when she's broken, fragile? I'm not going to let her float away from me, not again. If I see her cry, my shirtsleeves will be there to dry the salt tears that will sink down those porcelain cheeks. However, I'm the captain of the sinking ship that is my mind. I'm just a shipwreck waiting to happen. I'm not sure if I'll ever be able to carry on after this, if I don't vent out these stupidities that are embedded into my brain.

Would change for the better… ever come?

Marron was a frigid, cold person. She decided it was okay to stumble into my life and try to shatter my heart of when I was oblivious to the past. However despite these strange actions, I still held my undying adoration for her from the memories I locked away from my own self.

I knew she was hurt, and it was my fault she's so cold. In spite of her hatred towards me, I still felt an unceasing emotion swirl within me.

I still, to this day love her.

Trunks isn't the sort to say "no", that I most definitely know. His persistence amused me; I wonder…how is one so dedicated? My mind told me to find him and apologize, but my legs were just not responding.

Should I go back to Nana?

But…the thought this woman, whom I barely could remember was my grandmother, and she knew things about Trunks that I myself didn't know already was insanity…

What did she know?

I flew, flew faster than ever. My business tie flapped against my dress shirt, annoyingly hitting my chest. Despite these little details I was in fact over West City, looking for the small bistro I've sent her over and over, at last understanding the notes and the small letters she'd send.

Landing through the back, tip of my foot then flat against the floor, I went inside the small bistro aglow in gold.

"How may I –" the old woman staring at me as if I was some crazy alien (not that I'm not to begin with.) "Trunks," she stated calmly, "What a surprise…"

I sighed and sat in the high-stool my elbow propped on the table, "You know more than I do…right?"

The elderly woman wiped down the table, "Of?"

"You know what," my eyes never leaving her dark-brown ones, seriousness embedded into every word I spoke.

"I didn't think you'd remember," the elder sighed, "Marron passed by earlier this week."

My eyes widened, and she saw my surprise. Marron came here, for what? Was there something I was missing? Then I beckoned to ask the bothersome question that stirred inside me.

"Marron, she's planning to run from this place…isn't she?"

The elderly woman looked down to the counter, as it shimmered in the light. Surely there was more to be said. "Why don't we talk this over a cup of tea?" she offered, to which I kindly accepted.

Pouring up the last serving in my cup and hers, she sat before me in a seat right beside the window, "Marron sat there," she said before taking a sip of her tea, "She was very confused, like you."

I don't exactly know why I felt such a strange sense of comfort, knowing she sat here to speak with the woman who's helped me the last seven years of my life. The one who time and time again found me in my bad places. Finally my mind could remember how she found me in the middle of nowhere taking me to hospital.

"She's scared Trunks," I could see she was hesitant with her words, "If I tell you this, promise me, and I mean promise me, you will not take advantage of her."

In response I nodded, I don't think I could ever do such things again, "I promise."

The elder sighed, putting down her cup of tea, "She came to me, because she's scared of the person you are," I could still sense she was hesitant with her word-choice "She's scared that eventually, she'll well…"

I hate that she keeps pausing the suspense murdered me, "All you need to know Trunks, is that you need to find her," the elder finished her tea, "And tell her what feelings it is you posses…it's going to scare her believe me, scare her to the point where she isn't going to move."

Immediately I got up from my seat, fixing and dusting off my suit and looked down to the elder, "Wait just a moment Trunks," she continued, "You also need to do this fast…any moment now she could be completely out of reach."

I'm not quite sure what happened after; I nodded, said my 'thank you', then relentlessly ran down the snow-filled sidewalks, it's frigid cold ice falling on my skin, however I continued to walk. Vivid flashbacks of…my childhood, and Marron and Goten were there.

She'd been there since I was a child, how the hell had I not remembered her? How could I let such things be so out of reach, was my memory utterly failing me? I couldn't function. I couldn't run, at first I was thinking, "Maybe the cold has gotten to me."

But then I realized whom I had in front of me.

Time froze.

My heart banging violently, and those eyes, those crystalline blue eyes were looking into mine. Why couldn't I move damn it!

I was a broken down robot, my entire working body shut down. Under that annoying flickering lamppost stood the woman I wanted to hold in my arms and constantly apologize for being such an idiot.

Why can't my legs move, work you son-of-a-bitch!

I'm the son of the Prince of all Saiyans aren't I? Then why couldn't I fucking move?!

"How unexpected…" the blonde began, something in the way she was acting told me, she's changed, "Trunks…"

"Marron look I–" my voice failed me, because suddenly she wrapped her arms around my neck, leaving me flabbergasted in the sudden kiss. Where did this all come from, was she feeling the same electricity and rushed heartbeat as me?

The minute she pulled away, she looked down to the snow, then back up to me. "It's time to say goodbye."

"For now?"

"Forever."

A/N: *Ahem* I'm going to murder Marron, that was so uncalled for. Anyway, as always thanks for reading. Also, check out my new story "Childhood Blues" when you get the chance m'kay?

Review Responses:

Tiffany7898: Trunks is pretty blind, getting hit by lightening and all, well I mean he's 16 going on 17 while Marron is 14 I honestly don't blame them for doing such stupid things. Yep Marron's nana saved Trunks. Ironic how the girl that almost got him killed was actually rescued by that girl's grandma. Thanks For Reviewing!

Crystaline mystery: I'm glad you understand Trunks' humiliation simply could not get worse, as per your suggestion I had already read your story, so I just left two reviews, I definitely think you should continue as it's a great story! Thanks For Reviewing!

M.C: Aha, thank you so much hope you had a great Christmas yourself! Thanks For Reviewing!

HerosReprise: Yeah that whole thing was a lot revelations needs a re-read when going through these chapters. I was always planning on that lady being Marron's grandmother, however that would be interesting…Marron's future self. I think you'll see why she's quite an important character. Trunks was young, however we're not clear…if he was forced or he did it cause he wants to be an ass. Hint HINT. Well yeah, Marron has no memories of it for the same reason Trunks' has no memory of her. Again Hint hint. I took my own perspective of love and placed it in Nana honestly, I wasn't sure if it was realistic enough, I'm glad to hear it was. Thanks For Reviewing!

Thank you everyone for all the WONDERFUL reviews! Any tips/constructive critique is as always, welcome for you to send. Hope you Enjoyed!