My head hit the wall rather unexpectedly.

It wasn't that the kunoichi wasn't capable, but she had never before sought to hurt me, or anyone else really. If she won a sparring match, as she had with the bells, it was because it was something she could easily achieve without touching her opponent, or causing the slightest bit of pain. With someone this talented, it was something I was grateful for.

Now though, Sakura's chakra was ominous and erratic, showing off her massive ability, as well as her readiness to use it. Her eyes were slightly watery, but torn between fear, fury and sorrow. She was afraid. This was why I would have to act carefully. I knew she was scared, but I didn't know why, and therefore didn't know what I could do to calm her. I did the only thing that I could do, even though it may make things worse; I reached my arms out to her.

It took a while, but I didn't move or retract my offer as her eyes cooled down, her breathing became less laboured and her body lost it's stiff posture, beginning to shake. I felt a warm, light weight hit me again, but this time it was because she was embracing me rather than pushing me away. I much preferred this.

"I'm sorry, Sensei," She whispered and it brought back some memories, this way in which she spoke to me that she hadn't used since she was a genin. She hadn't ever really sort out my comfort, or let me see much weakness of character, although she didn't seem to have much problem with any weakness of abilities. She trusted me to look after her, and it was times like this that she showed it. For some reason, it didn't really sit well with me, the little girl showing through to glare me in the face. It filled me with disgust and contempt, both directed at myself as I realised that the child in her did have yet to go. My mind worked around it, trying to work out if this truly was a part of her being or simply a remainder set off by her outburst. A breakdown that I didn't know how I had caused.

"It's okay, Sakura," I soothed, stroking her hair as I tried to force my emotions and memories under wraps as they were having a field day with the way her lush body was pressed against me. Her hands were pressed tightly against my abs as she clung, her breasts pressed against me; I could feel them well through her thin shirt, making him highly aware of the fact that he wasn't wearing his Jonin attire… and Sakura had gone to visit Ino while still wearing her pyjamas.

"What?" She asked thickly, slightly defensively as I giggled. Apparently she had been offended by it.

"Nothing," I stroked her hair. " I just realised that you walked all of the way to Ino's in your pyjamas."

My heart lifted a little when she laughed too.

888

They really shouldn't brief people on the security of the hidden files. The more people knew, the more people could break in, and the less likely they were to blame this on me. I found the documents that I needed pretty quickly, and tons more than that besides. I left no trace as I entered the building, the room, the cabinets. Now I just had to decide whether I ought to take the time to copy the files rather than risk taking them with me and getting caught. Both ideas could get me caught, neither of which I was happy about, and how often would someone be looking at these anyway? I bet they hadn't be dug out in years, much like my Genin records. My ANBU ones were only dragged out occasionally to look impressive to out allied villages. They often forgot to mention that I'm no longer a part of it. Because we never really stop being ANBU. We work when our skills are required, and pretend to be happily retire otherwise.

Damnit. I sighed as got to work copying them, while keeping my chakra both masked and on edge. It was difficult to manage, but I needed to hide my presence while making sure that no one was coming this way. Once done, I hightailed it out of there are quickly as physically possible, while still certain that I hadn't left any evidence that could point in my direction. Even if I had, I hadn't taken the file with me, and could easily just say that I had been checking on something else. My lies were usually so ludicrous that people gave up trying, or that they would believe me the moment I spat out something remotely plausible.

My apartment was cool when I got in. I had left the window open slightly for Mr Ukki when I went to visit Sakura, and as it had been a few hours, my apartment was definitely well-aired. To the extent that my home had started smelling like fresh air, like outdoors, like there wasn't a lone man living here, ignoring the invention of air freshener and masturbating to random fantasies be it in the living room, bedroom or bathroom. Age has had no real effect on that. (By what Sakura had said earlier, it was a wonder she ever dropped round at all… even if she probably did like the idea…)

I closed the window tightly shut behind me, and dropped into a sitting position on the window ledge, opening the copied file up on my lap. This wasn't just a record of a single incident, or even several related incidents, but pretty much the story of Sakura's life. It was a file used by Ibiki, most likely he examined the girl at some stage, or one of the other psychiatrists/interrogators. It had even a copy of her birth certificate, and everything from that point on, but not even necessarily documents of any kind. There were letters here, clan treaties, the things of a fully functioning family in society. A lot of the references in here led to different files, so I would probably be making a return trip or two or three, unless I found out enough to get Sakura to tell me the rest. She could be stubborn when she wanted to be, so I doubted it.

One of the things that struck me about this file was the lack of a marriage photo, or a photo of Sakura as a newborn. This file held everything else; it had the marriage and birth certificates, even another small file that usually came from one family promising something (or someone) to another. But there were no photos until Sakura was a couple of years old, and those were medical photos, without her parents. The photos after that were a couple of her with Uchiha Itachi, and a couple that included Sasuke as well. Then the ones of her with her Uncle and Cousins. After that, there weren't any family members left that he knew of, and this was proven by the lack of them in the pictures between the last photo and the skip straight ahead to a copy of the picture they'd taken of Team 7. The ones in between had been taken by someone else, probably Iruka, as they showed Sakura, Naruto and Sasuke still in the academy.

I could look at this; a record of Sakura's life, and not know what her parents looked like. I suppose one of them had fair skin, the other green eyes, maybe she inherited her pink hair from a Grandmother?

What if Sakura herself didn't really know? She had been so young when her parents died, and maybe she didn't have a photo either? Surely someone in Konoha ought to?

"Hey there, brat. You left your mark again."

I turned to see Jiraiya stood behind me, but I didn't bother to hide the files. He had already seen them, and they were probably the reason that he'd come to begin with. He would never tell me what it was, but somehow I left a trace that was undetectable to anyone but him. Maybe he found it in sage mode?

I nodded at him. "Jiraiya."

"Found anything interesting there Kashi-kun?"

"Don't call me that."

Jiraiya smiled sadly. "Just copying Minato. It's nice to feel like someone does."

"That's Naruto. He's really grown strong, and his hold of the Kyuubi is increasing by the day. And you know I don't really mind.

"I just complained when he said it, too."

Jiraiya laughed. "You always were an irritating, independent little brat."

"You can't really call me a little brat anymore."

"You always will be to me, brat."

"Naruto is more deserving of the title."

Jiraiya just smiled again, and shook his head softly. " You and Naruto both. You were always Minato's favourite, you know? He entrusted you to me, along with Naruto in case of his death. Of course, you didn't really need much looking after by that point…"

"Yet you still make a point of invading my privacy for the sake of being a parental influence." I subtly slid the file to my side in the hope that he wouldn't comment on it. As usual, that was the worst thing to do.

"What you got there brat? Nothing I wouldn't give you, I hope?"

"What reading material wouldn't you give me old man?"

Jiraiya thought for a moment, but he wasn't thinking of reading material, he was wondering how to phrase what he was going to say. Usually this would lead me to attempt to run for it, because I knew that the conversation coming would be awkward. This time though, I would wait it out. He might have info, or maybe photos. For a while, Jiraiya used a camera to gain his references, so that he could study human interaction and whatever else it is that artists want to look at. He'd kept every photo too, apart from ones that people, like me, stole from him for sentimental or less savoury purposes.

He sat down beside me. "Why are you investigating the life of Haruno Sakura then?"

I gave my token resistance, shifting my expression to one of absolute boredom and resting my head in my palms. "I have no idea what you are talking about."

"Really?" He scooped up the discarded file. "Was this just planted on you?"

"It must have been nothing to do with me…" I smiled at him nicely - I may as well play nice. " Although, the file was left open when I got back here, and the wind kept turning the pages… I don't suppose you'd be powerful enough to be trusted with that all important info that would fill in the blanks?"

"I'm the most trusted ninja in Konoha! Of course I know the answers…" He turned serious. " but some of them Kakashi, you will have to find out for yourself."

"You see the thing is… there was a huge dragon that required this from me, and I must get all of the answers by 4.30 this afternoon or-"

"Or he'll drag you off of the road to life again? Nice try kid, but Sakura will have to tell you herself.

"Why are you so interested in the pink haired kunoichi anyway… she definitely has her charms, but she's… not your usual type."

"My usual type are complete bitches who don't really expect me to do any of the work…" I scratched my chin thoughtfully. "Suits me fine."

That was one of the things that baffled me. I wanted a lot more with Sakura than I had ever wanted with any other woman, and I had felt an absurd light feeling when I had heard her and Ino talking. It was the same kind of cutsey, bubbly feeling I got sometimes when I occasionally picked up a teen romance, and the girl finally gets the guy that she has been crushing on. Or like when I watch films like the Notebook, definitely alone, because I tend to cry a little at the ending, and also feel insanely jealous of the couple. Though Noah probably should have given up on Allie once she got engaged. I would have, to try and keep some pride, but I admire the way he builds up the house with her in mind. It makes me want to do something like that for someone. Someone like Sakura.

"And what does that tell you about Sakura?"

I frowned. Where was he taking this? I was certain he was just here to give me an ear clipping from stealing from the Hokage. They were… close, after all.

"That she's not the same as the others?" I felt like an academy kid, failing to answer a question, something that I had never done while in the academy. Ninja rules were easy. Memorising texts were nothing for me. Jiraiya… could be confusing.

"And what does THAT tell you?"

"That she's odd."

Jiraiya laughed. "You're a bit off there, Kashi-kun." He patted my knee. "Did you know that she has a plant named Kashi-kun? Why would she do that?"

"Because she finds it funny to think of me killing plants."

"But why would that stick?"

"Because when we were given them I told her how Mr Ukki the first died. She enjoys laughing at my expense."

Jiraiya shook his head. "Fine, deny it. See if I care." He got up and stretched, seemingly filling the room with his large form. He pulled something out of his pocket and passed it to me. I immediately stared looking through it with interest, becoming more and more intrigued as I looked at the picture. These were exactly what I wanted, and I hadn't even had to ask for them. Sometimes Jiraiya was just creepy with how accurate he could be without being told something. The man was never far off of the mark.

"When you go see Sakura later, you should take them with you to give to her."

I scowled at him again. "Who said I'm going to see Sakura later?"

"You didn't get what you wanted from me. Of course you are going to see her later."

"Maybe I was going to ask elsewhere first."

"No, even if you had you'd use it as an excuse to go see her."

"I don't need an excuse to go see her."

"Maybe. But that doesn't stop you from coming up with a reason every time you do." He ruffled my hair, something that I always pretended irritated me. He knew it didn't really. With hair as messy as mine, it was difficult to even see a difference. "Catch ya later, brat."

I waved at him half heartedly, still looking at the photos. "Later, you barmy old codger."

I continued going through the pictures. There were quite a few here, but I knew that there must be more. There hadn't been any in the file, but Jiraiya always had way of getting multiple snaps of people, and there were only a couple of each person here. Still, it was better than I could have found anywhere else.

Sakura's mother it seemed was a beauty, though with different colourings to her daughter. Her skin was pale, and her mouth was the same, with the same face shape, but she ha long black hair that reached waist level, and flat purple eyes. She looked cold here as she stood next to her husband, who looked even more indifferent. There was something off about these people, or perhaps something off about their marriage. The father looked the same in all the pictures, if not worse, but in the ones where she was younger, and the gold band was missing from her finger her eyes were closer to violet than the near obsidian they had been in later pictures, and her pupils were normal, automatically making her appear more alive. She smiled, and I could see Sakura's smile there, the few times that she had truly smiled at me.

There were only a couple of pictures of them married, only one of their wedding, and only a couple more of them with their daughter. Sakura's hair was pink, but as a baby her eye colour differed between purple and green, with no reason that could be found just by looking at the images. In a photo dated only days after her parents' death her eyes were purple. But Kakashi had never seen her with anything but green.

Jiraiya had also included pictures of her grandparents, and her aunties and uncles, only one of each family member, and labelled them in relation to her. Some of them also held addresses. Maybe he wanted her to get in contact with some of them - that would mean that some of them were still alive. He knew that her uncle and cousins had died when she was a child, but why had the others not taken care of her? After the massacre, Sakura had taken care of herself, same as Sasuke, and I have to say, from a fatherly perspective and also from experience, that that was too young. I can't imagine leaving a child alone to fend for themselves. I would always make a back up plan. At least my father had left me Jiraiya to make sure that I stayed alive.

And for a while, my mother. She had been so.. Emptied by father's death and the huge change that occurred still haunts me. I still have nightmares about it, and that was really the main reason why I couldn't walk in his footsteps. I couldn't hurt anyone like that.

When you love someone, you don't leave them. And suicide counted as leaving. He chose to. Honour killing or not, it was wrong to leave your family. We weren't ashamed of him, and I was too young to fully understand what came from it. I couldn't understand that he was bringing honour and respect back to the family. All I could do was come to terms with the fact that Dad was gone, and that Mother was slowly going with him. I hated him for that.

Did Sakura feel something similar? Did she feel resentment for the family that had left her alone, with no one to care for her?

I rose to my feet slowly and pocketed the photographs, deep in thought for the entire journey to Sakura's house. She needed someone to look after her. I would happily let that be me.

I tapped on her window, irritated. She'd actually sealed it for once, and it would be a lot less damaging in my current distracted state if she just let me.

"Yo, Sak!" I tapped again.

She looked rather flustered as she opened the window and hurriedly let me in. "Hey Kashi." She murmured, sounding slightly subdued. Her eyes were cast down and her eyelashes rested lowly on her pink dusted cheeks, making her incredibly appealing. But she looked sad, she was probably still upset from this morning.

I instinctively folded her into a quick hug, and when she smiled as we let go I knew that I had done the right thing. I wasn't going way off the mark, and I felt slightly happier that I hadn't just landed on my face.

"I brought something that I though you might like to look at." I pulled out the photos and folded her under my arm as I offered them to her. She took them from me, staying in my one armed embrace as she stared at the top one for minutes without blinking or flicking through to the others.

"Jiraiya gave them to me. He thought that you may like to have them."

Sakura looked up at me, her eyes clouded up with tears. "Thank you, Kakashi," She whispered, and she reached up to wrap her arms around my neck. I place mine around her and held her closer, letting her take comfort from me. I could feel her breath on my neck. "I've never had a picture of them before." Her voice quivered. "Do you know where Jiraiya-sama got them?"

I felt a gentle smile take over my mouth as I looked at her eyes, lit up both happily and sadly. "He used to take pictures by the hundreds. He may have more if you ask him."

"Why did he give them to you?"

Would she be angry at me for going through her file, and invading her privacy? "I found the case file, because I wanted to find out more about you. I should have asked you first, but I wanted to know what set you off this morning. I can go get it for you if you like."

"Please."

I nodded and turned to leave, but I then turned back around as I felt her small hand tugging on my sleeve. "Do you think any less of me?"

"I haven't found anything to indicate that I should." Sakura coloured, and let go of me, and I took this as permission to leave.

888

When I returned, Sakura was in the shower, I could hear the pounding of it from her bedroom. She had left the window open for me, and I flopped onto her bed as I waited for her to be done. I dumped the file onto the pillow next to me, and lazily slid my gaze over her belongings. Sakura was a very neat person, almost to the extent of OCD. Her books were alphabetised, and placed on the shelves so that they were all in line and ones of very different size were placed elsewhere. Very neat.

That led me to her other material, but before I had dragged out the box of goodies, Sakura came back into the room looking absolutely adorable with messy half dry hair and a huge fluffy white dressing gown that reached her favourite fluffy bunny slippers. She definitely didn't wear sexy pyjama's, but with Sakura this was almost as good. She looked adorable like a fluffy owl, and very cuddly.

"Let's see then." She demanded softly, and shuffled over to me. I reached over and pulled her close to me, dropping the file onto her lap.

"Take your time."

A/N - Hello to you observant people, if you had not noticed, I have now changed my penname to Kashi-Cookie-Monster, formerly ilygodot. As usual, this is not Beta'd so I am sorry for any mistakes, and I shall try to update soon.

R&R