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Shared Sorrow

Chapter 14

Fenton used the key Jeff had given him, to unlock the door to Kevin's house. The small ranch house stood on a quiet, tree-lined street in a suburb of Phoenix. At first, he'd found it odd that a twenty-five year old bachelor would want to live in a neighborhood of families with children ranging in age from newborns to teens. What could he possibly have in common with them? From what Jeff had told him, Kevin and his girlfriend Gina hadn't been dating all that long and weren't even close to talking marriage or raising a family. But after thinking about it for a while, Fenton wondered if Kevin wasn't trying to recapture something he felt he'd missed out on in his own childhood.

Shaking his head sadly at such a depressing thought, Fenton stepped through the front door where he stopped and studied the layout of the house. To his left was a small living room with a fireplace at the far end and a large picture window looking out onto the porch. He glanced to his right at the small hallway presumably leading to the bedrooms and then walked in the opposite direction.

Stopping in front of the fireplace, he looked at the few pictures displayed on the mantel. One was of Kevin and a woman Fenton assumed to be Gina. He picked it up for a closer look at the couple. Kevin was a handsome young man with light brown hair and hazel eyes. Gina seemed almost exotic with her dark hair, almost black in color, olive complexion and deep brown eyes. His eyes were drawn back to Kevin. There was something about his nephew, something in his eyes that bothered Fenton.

Frustrated, he replaced that picture and picked up the one next to it – a family photo of Jeff, Carole, Kelly and Kevin. And that was when he realized what was bothering him. While the entire Cutter family was smiling for the camera, the looks in their eyes and on their faces told a different story entirely. Jeff's face was etched with years of guilt; Carole's eyes reflected misery and sadness; Kelly, even while smiling, appeared to be a bitter, angry young woman and Kevin… Kevin looked defeated. As if he'd been carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders and couldn't bear the burden another second.

Gently Fenton returned the picture to the mantel and almost without thinking reached for his wallet. Flipping it open, he gazed down at the pictures he always carried with him. The first was of him, Laura, Frank and Joe. It had been taken at Bayport's annual River Fest a few years earlier. He stood with his arm around Laura's waist. Next to her was Joe, with one arm around his mother and the other hanging loosely over Frank's shoulder. They were all smiling with the picture accurately capturing how much they enjoyed being together as a family.

Turning the little plastic page, he smiled at the two pictures that meant so much to him. He'd always hoped his sons would find love – true love – the kind he shared with Laura. The faces staring back at him from the pictures told him those hopes had become reality.

The first was of Frank and Callie, taken on their wedding day. Glowing was the word that always came to mind when he looked at this picture of his son and daughter-in-law. His eyes shifted to the photo next to it, and his smile grew. It was an impromptu shot Laura had taken the night Joe and Vanessa came by to announce they were engaged. He could honestly say he'd never before seen Joe as happy as he was that night. And Vanessa… he stared at the young woman who had turned his son's life around.

"Thank you," he whispered.

Swallowing the lump in his throat, he closed the wallet and put it back in his pocket. Looking up, his eyes fell, once more, on the picture of the Cutter family and he realized despite all the horrors his family had endured in the past year, they were truly blessed.

Turning to his right, Fenton walked through the arched doorway into the dining room/kitchen. Sliding glass doors opened out onto a deck that overlooked a well-kept backyard. Walking through the kitchen, Fenton found himself at the opposite end of the hallway he'd seen a moment earlier from the living room. Directly in front of him was the master bedroom; next to it was a bathroom and on the other side of the bathroom stood another bedroom that had been turned into an office. Knowing he had a long day ahead of him, Fenton walked into the bedroom to begin his search, hoping it would be more fruitful than the search of Kevin's office the previous day.

oooOOOooo

Kelly Cutter stared at her parents, still fuming. They had told her several days ago that they were going to hire Fenton Hardy to find Kevin, so she should have gotten used to the idea but it still left a bitter taste in her mouth. She looked away with a scowl, the hatred burning inside her. He was the reason her life had been turned upside down! Him and his brainless son! She didn't know all the details but had long ago decided she didn't need to. She knew that Joe Hardy had been stupid enough to let himself be kidnapped and his father had the nerve to blame her parents for it!

Angrily, she chewed on a hangnail, inadvertently ripping it off, and cursed when it started to bleed. Ever since Fenton and Laura Hardy had forced her family to leave Bayport nothing had gone right and this was just one more thing to add to the list.

Standing up, she stalked across the kitchen and yanked open the drawer where her mother kept a small first aid kit. She pulled it out and slammed the drawer shut, muttering to herself all the while.

"What did you say, Kelly?" her father asked. He was seated at the counter, next to her mother, both of them wearing matching looks of guilt and sadness.

"I said I don't understand why you had to go all the way across the country to hire a private investigator. Aren't there any investigators between here and the Atlantic?" she said sarcastically. Applying some ointment and a band-aid to her finger, she returned the first aid kit to the drawer, slamming it again just for good measure.

"He's the best there is," Jeff defended their decision. "And he's your uncle."

Kelly rolled her eyes. "Oh, please. I barely remember the man. And I have no desire to get to know him after the way he blamed you and Mom for what happened to his stupid son. My God, he was a cop's kid! He should've known better than to talk to strangers!" she ranted bitterly. "And if he is related to us, he should be doing this free of charge!" Her anger grew at the thought of her parents turning over their meager savings to pay for Fenton Hardy's services. If he was the best at what he did, he should be pretty well off already. 'And if he didn't make us move away from Bayport, none of this would even be happening!'

"You're rewriting history again, Kelly," Jeff replied wearily. "Joe didn't talk to anyone. He was kidnapped."

Kelly snorted in disgust but remained silent. She and her father'd had this discussion ad nauseum over the years and it always infuriated her the way he stuck up for Joe. Turning her back on Jeff, she stared at the wall listening as her mother began to speak, haltingly at first as if she wasn't sure she really wanted to say what was on her mind.

"You saw Laura, too, while you were there," Carole repeated what her husband had told them the previous night. "Did… did she say anything about... " She stopped abruptly and Kelly could hear her inhale deeply, something she did when she was afraid or nervous. "Did she ask about me at all?" Carole blurted out.

Kelly felt a wave of repugnance at the hopeful note in her mother's voice. Laura Hardy hadn't acknowledged her existence since the day they moved away. Why did she think that would change now?

Kelly glanced over her shoulder just in time to see Jeff turn away and look out the window. The long silence that followed effectively answered the question.

"Bitch," Kelly muttered under her breath.

"KELLY ANN CUTTER! Don't you ever speak about my sister like that!" her mother reprimanded.

"She's not your sister anymore," Kelly spat out turning to face her parents again. "At least she doesn't think so!"

"She'll always be my sister," Carole replied, emotionally. Kelly simply rolled her eyes, the gesture unnoticed by her mother who had returned her attention to Jeff.

"Did you see Joe at all?"

"Who cares if-" Kelly began before being silenced by a look from her father. She watched as he reached out and took her mother's hands in his and held them tightly. Thankfully, Joe's name hadn't come up in discussion the night before, but it looked like she was about to hear all about her hated cousin now.

"I didn't see him, no. A lot of pictures of him, though. Laura's got the whole living room decked out with pictures of the boys." He smiled for a moment, but it quickly disappeared as he began to relate what Fenton had told him about Joe.

As Kelly watched her parents discussing Joe with such concern and compassion, she felt her anger and hatred for him grow immeasurably. She couldn't believe what she was hearing! All her life she'd been led to believe he was a basket case as a result of the kidnapping. At least that's the impression her parents had given her. If he wasn't, why were they so consumed with guilt – to the point they neglected their own two children? And now to find out he'd lived a perfectly normal, happy childhood while hers was all but destroyed? And it was all because of him! Unable to stand and listen to anymore, Kelly snatched her purse off the counter

"Oh, please spare me," she snarled at her father. "From the sounds of it, I'd trade places with him in a heartbeat! So he was kidnapped when he was six. He needs to get over it already!" Turning on her heel, Kelly stalked out the back door, slamming it behind her.

…

Carole jumped as Kelly slammed the door so hard the wall shook. She looked at her husband, shocked. Were they responsible for her attitude towards Joe? Towards the entire Hardy family? Feeling overwhelmed by the thought, she pushed it away, focusing on her husband. She was relieved to hear Joe had never remembered a thing about the kidnapping, or what had happened during the time he'd been held by the child porn ring, but she could tell from the look in her husband's eyes that he hadn't revealed everything yet. Steeling herself, Carole asked him to continue.

She listened in utter disbelief as Jeff told her about Joe's fiancée being raped, his subsequent arrest for murdering the man who'd done it, his complete breakdown during the trial and admittance to a psychiatric hospital…

'Oh my, God…' Carole thought, pale and trembling. 'It's worse than either of us ever thought!'

Standing, Carole walked zombie-like into her bedroom. She picked up the picture nestled on the back corner of her dresser and stared at it, longing to go back in time. The photo of the Cutter and Hardy families had been taken almost twenty years earlier. It was fading and ragged around the edges. Carole stared at it for a long time. Her eyes roamed the faces, stopping on the smiling face of her younger sister.

'Oh, Laurie… no wonder you hate me…'

oooOOOooo

Joe lay in bed, staring at the ceiling. He could hear Vanessa, beside him, breathing softly; she'd fallen asleep hours ago. He wanted to fall asleep too, and put this miserable day behind him, but his mind was spinning with thoughts and emotions and showed no signs of slowing down anytime soon. He thought back over the evening and mentally kicked himself.

Vanessa had known something was wrong the second she got home from work. She could read him like a book and Joe always considered that a blessing and a curse. Today he'd felt cursed. He knew she was only trying to help but he was edgy and tense, knowing something was definitely wrong but unable to figure out what. When Vanessa realized he wasn't going to talk about it with her, she had innocently suggested he call Frank and that's when he snapped.

He'd apologized almost immediately, explaining he wanted to talk to Frank but just couldn't quite figure out where to begin. It wasn't really a lie; if he didn't know what the problem was how was he supposed to know how to explain it? She had forgiven him, as she always did, but Joe could feel her eyes on him the rest of the night, watching warily, knowing he wasn't being completely honest.

Rolling over, he wrapped his arms around Vanessa and gently pulled her close to him, careful not to awaken her. She sighed softly in her sleep and snuggled closer to him, making him feel a little less anxious. He smiled at the way she could calm his nerves even without knowing it. Despite the comfort and security he now felt, Joe knew sleep was still a ways off. He kept hearing Frank's voice echoing in his head…

"Call me, huh?"

And he wanted to – desperately – but something stopped him. Something he'd pushed below the surface, out of sight, out of mind, out of cognizant thought, but still always there, lurking, waiting for just the right time.

Joe had become all too familiar with this feeling over the past year and he hated it. It always started with the dreams; dreams he couldn't recall but that always left him with a feeling of terror when he awoke. Until the final dream, when everything would come barreling back to the surface. Holding Vanessa a little tighter, Joe finally felt his eyes grow heavy. As he drifted off to sleep, somehow he knew his subconscious had decided it was the right time. Tonight was the night…

oooOOOooo

The little boy huddled on the floor, cowering in the corner. Moments earlier he'd heard people yelling and shouting. The men who had grabbed him had been yelling at him off and on ever since they took him from the park and it scared him. Still he preferred their yelling to what happened when the other man came for him. He tried to be brave, but his small body could only take so much abuse. He hurt everywhere and he felt his eyes start to burn as he remembered what he had to do to avoid the beatings.

Another shout caused him to jump. He heard the sounds of pounding feet on the stairs. Pulling his knees in close to him, he tried to make himself even smaller. The running footsteps were getting closer and it sounded like there was more than one person. Wiping the tears from his eyes, he hoped with all his heart that one of those people was his brother. He'd been waiting and waiting, but with every hour that passed, he felt alone and forgotten, his hope slipping away.

'He promised. He'll come for me, I know he will.' The little boy had been trying to console himself since he'd been whisked away from the park. Keeping his eyes tightly closed, he pictured his brother in his mind. He tried to remember how it felt when his brother made that promise.

"I'll always come back for you."

The shouting got louder and the little boy jumped in fear, recognizing one of the voices as the man who had beaten him several times since he'd arrived in this awful place. He whimpered and squeezed his shut even tighter, wishing and praying for his brother. 'Please don't leave me here alone!'

Suddenly the door burst open, startling the child. The man who beat him ran into the room, looking around wildly. His eyes lit on the small boy and he lunged forward.

The boy pressed himself into the corner and cried out for his brother. "Frank!"

The man grabbed his shirt and dragged him a few feet, lifting him off the floor. Suddenly the man let go and he fell to the floor, hard. He scrambled back to the safety of the dark corner, terrified. The room was flooded with people, yelling and running in all directions. At first the little boy feared he'd be forced to do things with the men scurrying about the room; the same awful things he'd had to watch the other children do.

Huddled in the corner, shaking and shivering with fear, he noticed something – all the men were dressed alike. They were wearing uniforms. Sort of like the uniform his daddy used to wear before they moved. His blue eyes grew huge as it dawned on him – the police! The men who had run into the room and were now holding down the man who had beaten him were police officers!

'Frank brought them!' he thought with a rush of relief. 'He didn't forget me! He came back, just like he promised!' His brother hadn't let him down.

Anxiously, the boy watched the door anticipating his brother's arrival. Just when he thought he couldn't wait another second, his father ran through the door. The man looked around the room frantically. Finally he saw the little boy, still hovering in the corner. In seconds the man was by his side, scooping the small boy up in his arms.

"Joey! Oh, God, Joey!"

The little boy snuggled into his father's arms, all the while peering over his shoulder and watching the door, not wanting to miss his brother's arrival. He heard his father sniffling, his head buried in the boy's neck. Minutes passed and with them so did the little boy's hope. Tears stung his eyes; his brother wasn't coming…

Clutching his father's jacket with both hands, the little boy buried his face in his father's chest. Too heartbroken to cry, the boy simply whimpered, alone, afraid, forgotten and betrayed…

'Frank… you never came.'

Joe woke suddenly to what felt like a crushing weight in his chest. Long buried memories surrounded him and his biggest fear became a reality. For the past year, he had been afraid that he hadn't remembered everything from that horrible weekend. Now he knew he was right. The betrayal had been heartbreaking to him as a six-year-old boy. Tonight, it was devastating. Rolling onto his side, Joe curled into a ball. He felt as if he were back in that room, pressing himself into the corner, praying for Frank to arrive and rescue him from the monsters just like he promised he would.

Joe bit his lip, the reality just as devastating now as it was then. The memory he never wanted to remember grabbed him and refused to let go. Alone, afraid, forgotten…