How is it going? I come to you with a new chapter. It is like a week late, but I have the conviction that it will worth it. It wasn't easy to write at all and the following could not be rushed at all.
You probably have noticed it since then, but I had the wild idea of making some part of the dialogues in Japanese and I decided to go fully with it for the final part of Fitz and Sophie. It forced me to really work on the dialogue. I have not studied this language for that long and I have no senpai to proofread it, but I believe that it is quite accurate. If you really feel like reading those lines (even if it is only to please the writer that worked hard on it ;P ), you should know the letters having an accent, like ô, have long pronunciation.
So, let's just put a Disclaimer for Oda's greatness and you can now enjoy.
Lloyd the Renegade
Chapter 14
The waves inside the walls that surrounded West Blue Headquarter harbor were still shaking from the terrific explosion that happened when Lloyd took care of the canal. Numerous pieces of flaming debris were still floating around and sending a heavy cloud of smoke hanging in the air. The water was also tremendously cold. The two men that were expelled into the water, when Lloyd daringly jumped over the debris, experienced it firsthand. They tried to swim back toward the pier, but the crashing of the boat and the impressive weapon barrage that followed Lloyd's arrival kind of tempered their will. Even after it ceased and afterward when the sound of the battle that happened at the top went silent, they were still doubtful about getting any closer. At some point, they looked at each other while their teeth were chattering and decided that it was about time.
It is halfway through their progression that they heard a puzzling ruckus behind them. A loud sound of breaking debris and scrapping metal was coming closer. They instinctively turned toward it and tried to gaze through the smoke while being tossed harshly by the waves. The curtain of smoke was pushed toward them before breaking down to reveal the tip of a giant ship. A row of cannon was located on front and metal plates were covering the hull. The smoke was sticking on the upper structure and slowly dissipated. The ship had almost reached the swimming men when its smoke veil finally cleared. A wide blue seagull was flapping along with the white sails.
The large structure could not be mistaken. Such an enormous ship was as famous as the man that was standing on the tip of it. The Martel's Justice that was lead by the great Captain Jackoms. The pair almost momentarily stopped swimming from total stupor. They barely got over their stupefaction that they hear a loud explosion coming from the headquarter. Their surprise only increased when they saw flying pieces of concrete coming from the center of the tall building that soon started to hang into the air. The current visibility was quite bad, but they had the impression that small figures were emerging from the large fissure. The fighting were not done yet…
/ For those of you that wish to listen to a song while reading this chapter, here's one that I listened over and over again to put myself in the mood. It is composed by Daisuke Ishiwatari, sing by Dale Paris Sanchez with chorus from opera singer Sachi Kitazawa, taken from the game Blazblue: Continuum Shift. It is the theme of Tsubaki vs. Jin. The lyrics and the background behind it make a lot of senses for the following.
It is named Childish Killer. Make sure you are not listening the version 2, it has less dramatic feeling. /
The rolling of a revolver's barrel that put itself into place before the expulsion of the next bullet. The hissing of lead that cleared the distance between the two engaging party. A sharp scrapping sound as the bullet came into contact with the widest blade of a dual-scythe. The stamping of steps that quickly covered the area in a confrontation for gaining the best position. Multiple whistling of wind that was cut quickly chained before ending with the clashing of the scythe against the rifle. It was then followed by gapping breath after this long exchange.
Fitz took this opportunity to ask: «Nande, Sophie… Nande futari wa kettô iru ka (Why, Sophie… Why do we fight each other!?)» He did not any answer and she simply took a step back while quickly spinning on herself. She then tried to stab him with her bayonet. He did not try to avoid it and focused on catching it with his hand. She tried to pull it back, but he increased his grip even if it severely injured his hand: «Ôi, kotaete kudasai (Eh, answer me!)» He then lowered the gun in emergency. He held with moderate success a grunt of pain. He was not fast enough to pull the gun to a safe angle when she shot and he received a bullet on the upper leg. He released the bayonet and used his bloody fist to throw a punch on her face. She was sent on the ground under the strong impact and blood stained her face. It came from his bleeding hand and not the hit. He was not able to gain the will to hurt her seriously: «Nande… (Why…)»
She stood up slowly will reloading her pistol that she lifted toward his face. She kept her face pointing down, her hair now undone and covering her face, and said with an empty voice: «Koi (Come.)» Fitz quickly jumped out of the way, even if his injured leg hurt like hell when he jumped, to avoid her attack. He tried to take cover behind one of the pillar of the room: «Muekina (Futile.)» She lifted her rifle with her other hand and quickly calculated her shot. She fired at a seemingly random spot, but the bullet ricocheted and came right at him.
He came out of his hiding spot and decided to head straight for her. She came back to her pistol, but she stopped her move while opening her eyes wide with stupefaction. He was keeping his arms wide open and waited for the shot. He took a fierce glare while asking: «Kimi no tôki doko ni iru no (Where is you fighting spirit?) Senchô ga tasukete de kochiradesu de wanai (It's not this way that you will help the capt'n.)» That seemed to raise a deep anger into her and she emptied her revolver toward him. Those shots were not taken with any accuracy and he could easily dodge them will progressing toward her. He must have managed to shook her up pretty badly because she tried to shoot him even when the barrel was empty before trying to reload. Until now, she was keeping a perfect watch of her ammunition count. He took this opportunity to grab her by the collar and asked her: «Nani ga okotte iru. Ore ni setsumei (What is happening? Explain to me!)»
She was avoiding his look and she was not fighting back at all. Fitz was wondering what had happened to this strong desire to save Lloyd that manifested sooner and why she was trying to kill him. Couldn't they speak this out? There has to be a better solution. Soon after they started to exchange blow, she took this strange cold facade and it was impossible to obtain more than two words from her. She was definitely not the same than a couple of minutes ago. She had been looking straight at him when she started to fight once more, but this time she was clearly avoiding eyes contact. She seemed very frail right now between his hands. She was not giving the same aura. Fitz noted her shaking lower lip and could feel an uneasiness in all her move. He had been wondering what kind of emotion he was feeling from her… «Kowei ka na (Scared "question" "to himself"?)» He said to himself, but she was proximate enough to hear it and she violently took a step back to break free of his hold. Fitz was not focused and she was already gone before he could react.
«Urusai (Shut up! "You are noisy")» She tried to shot him at point blank with her revolver, but she have not reloaded it. During that moment that she was dazed by the outcome, Fitz had already caught the gun with his wounded hand and twisted it out of her grip. He threw it far and looked at her directly in the eyes. She immediately turned her head and said with a low voice: «Atashi wa kowagatte inai… Kowakunai yo (I am not scared… Not scared!)» She tried to lift her rifle, but Fitz had already anticipated it and grabbed her extended arms. He made a leg slide behind hers and twisted his body to make her trip over his hip. She crashed loudly on the ground and rolled a little to end on her belly. Before she could fully recover, he kicked her rifle out of her reach. She tried to crawl away, but he grabbed her by the shoulders to force her to return on her back and held her down. She commanded him with a sharp voice: «Kaihôshite (release me!)» But she then took a darker tone and said without any doubt in her voice: «Mushiro kuroshite. Yoku naru yo. (Instead, kill me. It will be better.)»
«Uso da (It's a lie!)» He immediately answered her with deep anger. He unconsciously increased his grip on her while he explained her: «Shinitai to kowagatte to iu uso da yo (It's false when you say that you want to die and that you are not scared!)» Her face was now twitching with pain from the pressure he was applying. He got aware that he was getting carried away to the point of hurting her and he removed his hands: «Gomen na… (I'm sorry)» He dropped a sharp glance on her and she finally held his gaze. A lone tear was hanging from the corner of her eyes. It was clear that she was trying to act in a way that displeased her. However, she already made her mind on saving Lloyd and was pretty serious about it. With such determination, she did not have to be scared at all. He was not getting sense from any of this. Since he was uselessly breaking his head about that, he gave up in this final plea: «Boku ni setsumei… (Explain to me.)»
He then slowly lowered his face until his chin rested on her forehead. She could feel it in his breath and the way his hands was holding her; That powerless fright that came from incomprehension… and also the pain of not understanding someone that you cared for. Fitz was delivering all his feelings to her, for her, with the simple wish to help her. He was so simple and honest, yet she had been purposely making it so difficult for him. She had to be honest with herself, she was running away from this. At least trying. Trying to forget the terrible conclusion that she stumbled upon. To forget what her heart could be wishing and to act for what she stood for. To act in accordance to the value she defended. But in order to do that, she had to negates her emotion. To get as much mentally detached that she could… To turn into a heartless warrior like Lloyd had actually taught her. That was probably the only of his lesson that she never got good at. While she might be a big sentimentalist, to become so cold was simply awful. What broke her resolve the most was when she was considering that her mentor was maybe accomplishing it without problem: «Mô… Wakata. (Sheesh… Fine "Understood".)»
She carried her hand to Fitz shoulder and pushed him back so she could look at him once more. His look was a spear right to her heart, but she had to face that gaze if she wanted to be totally honest. She took a deep breath and forced herself to not simply apologize. Apologies would not be enough. Not when she knew what she had to do. «Kyohi o ikirute iranai (I will not live in denial.)» She closed her eyes for a moment to build up her resolve: «Atashi wa Kaigun no heishi desu (I am a soldier of the Marine.)»
«Masayoshi ga hôshi suru yakusoku… (I promised to serve Justice.)» She was now at the conclusion that she arrived after believing that she could save Lloyd. She probably knew ever since she learned of his betrayal, but her mind constantly denied that outcome: «Roido-sensei… iie, Roido ze Renegado wa shinanakeraba naranai. (Lloyd-sensei…No, Lloyd the Renegade cannot be allowed to live.) Atashi wa kare o kurosu (I will kill him.) Atashi no gimu desu (It is my duty)»
Fitz simply stared at her for a while before standing up slowly. He currently was in a state of shock and he did not know how to react. Such a confession did not make any sense to him after she told him how much she cared for Lloyd. «Uso deshô ne… (You're lying, right…)» He felt like he needed to hold on to something or else he would simply fail into a void. Sophie was standing once more in front of him with her full confidence, but this time her goal had changed drastically. She pulled a small knife that she was hiding in her boot from all this time and pointed it toward her. She started to walk toward him, her hand gripping tightly the little blade, and closed the distance quickly. She was lowering her head and Fitz was unable to read her expression. She then took a swing at him and it was more his instinct that made him take a leap back.
She continued to swing wildly the little blade, driving the stupefied pirate back, and said aloud in an effort to justify her act: «Tsumibito wa shobatsu sa rerubekidearu (Criminals ''Sinners'' must be punished.)» She took a little pause in order to gather her breath and then joined both of her hand on the knife: «Seigi ga aru koto (It is Justice!)» She then rushed at him while aiming at his heart. The short blade pierced the flesh quite easily and soon blood started to run along its handle. She then lifted her head, her red hair stock on her face from her tears, and looked at the blood that started to taint her hand. She then started to whimper and was unable to move from the shock. She stared at the wound and could not get her eyes off. Her fingers then slid from the handle as her arms felt powerless.
Fitz then lowered the hand that he used to block the blade and removed it in a gush of blood: «Seigi da? (justice?)» He dropped the knife on the ground and said with a voice filled with wrath: «Nan Seigi no chikara kara kurosu tame ni (What Justice will force you to kill)» He tightened his fists, only causing blood to roll on his finger and to drip from his knuckles, before yelling at her: «Imiwonasanai (It makes no sense!)» He took a step forward he she started move back: «Omae ga sonkei suru… Kurosu (Those that you have respect for… Kill them.) Omae ga aisuruhito… Kurosu (Those that you love… Kill them.)» He looked at her severely, but his hatred was not in fact directed to her. It was directed toward the nonsense this world could create: «Nani o… Seigi. Kono Seigi ni kimi wa naku (What… Justice? You cry in this Justice.)»
Sophie hit the corner of a table while stepping back from Fitz's harsh words and almost lost balance. She laid her hands on it to be able stay on her shacking feet. Soon after, tears started to slam the wooden surface. Fitz had stopped and he was looking at her sorrow, which made his anger drop quickly. Sophie was sobbing loudly and kept her head hanging above the table. She was unable to carry it through the end… Unable to follow her life long belief… Unable to do what was right. All of that because she was weak. She asked while making her palm running over her eyes to push back the hair and the tears: «Nani o subeki ka (What should I do?)»
She raised supplicating eyes at him; asking directions since she was totally lost. Her distress was palpable. She wished to act in accordance with her belief. To bring justice and to follow her honor. Yet, this was only bringing suffering to her. Fitz had a simple answer to her: «Dôkô… Issho ni iku. Nakama to shite. (Accompany us… Let's go together. As Nakamas.)» She wished to help Lloyd. She was a friend of his capt'n. This was a way simpler and logic choice. One that was without pain: «Sore wa kimi no kokoro no negai desu ka (Isn't that what your heart wish?)»
Her tears seemed to have practically stopped when he asked her this. Her doubt however was still easily perceivable. Was it truly what she wished? Of course, her feelings for Lloyd were real and she sincerely hoped to return to his side. However, Lloyd was showing his true face and she was certain that she would not love him anymore. From what she knew of his current self, he had become something that was going against what she believed. The good sides she knew of him, his stubbornness, quick-wit, strong self-confidence and his desires to make things better… They will all be twisted to serve his wrong quest. And she also knew that he carried enough darkness inside him to become a monster. She could be by Lloyd's side to make sure that he would not fall into the wrong path. However, she had doubt. This doubt itself was served by a single certitude. She was weak. Since she was facing so much hardship only to make her mind, she had no right to try and change someone strong belief. She could not tolerate herself if she had chosen the easy way and then only lived in regret as she watched the man she loved fall always more into madness: «Sumimasen. Ukeirenai. (Pardon me. I don't accept.)»
She quickly perceived the incomprehension that filled his look. What seemed like an easy choice for Fitz held a much deeper meaning to her: «Atashi wa… Kaigun no hôhô o shinjite. Roido ni sayû suru koto ga atashi no shin'nen o kyohi suru kotodesu. Sore wa sayû ni akudearu. Atashi no Seigi ni hanta suru tame ni. (I believe in the Marine's way. To side with Lloyd is to reject my belief. It is to side with evil. It is against my justice.)» The Marine had so much meaning to her. She could not simply threw it away. Even if some of the atrocities that were linked to it were right, she firmly believed that it was something good for this world.
This was of course hard to comprehend from the point of view of Fitz that exploded: «Mada Seigi da (Again with Justice!) Chûsei o jisshô tame ni shine… Kono baka (To die in order to prove your loyalty… You idiot!)» »The damn stubbornness of that girl was getting on his nerves. The boy always been the direct kind and this riddling constant change of heart was leaving him in confusion. When she started to walk toward her rifle in order to take it back, he did not know what to do. His mind was not able to make a decision, to clear his doubt and to make a choice he would not regret. How could he fight someone that was blinded by a stupid misconception of Justice. He was however surprised by her answer.
She stopped at her rifle and turned toward him. If she wanted to act strong for once, now was the time. She took a deep breath to build her resolve and explained. «Atashi ga baka desu ka. Mâ, so desu na. Demo, atashi wa aho de wanaidesu. (Am I an idiot? Well, it is the case "from my point of view". However, I am not utterly stupid.)» She took a pause to look at her weapon that was lying by her feet: «Kaigun no Seigi wa aho desu. Shikashi, jibun de Seigi o shinjirô. Watashi no Seigi da… Kono sekai wa kenen kara sakusei sa remasu. Soshite, sore wa futô desu. Sore ga… Kenen to abaku o tôshite henka sa seru koto ni arimasen yo (Marine's Justice is utterly stupid. However, I want to believe in my own Justice. My Justice is… This world is created by fear "concern". And that is unjust. That is why… Change shouldn't be brought by fear and violence!)» She then picked up her rifle and readied it without taking aim. «Dakara… Teishi suru hitsuyô ga arimasu. (So… It's necessary to stop you.)»
Fitz took a moment to assay Sophie's determination that reflected perfectly in her calm look. He believed that he had witnessed her determination before, but now that she arrived at a decision taken all by herself, he was simply impress by her current energy. His anger and confusion easily vanished and it turned into a positive vibe. He was proud. Proud to see that she did not gave up in her belief even with the pain that this brought her. Satisfied to know that before they ended this, she could finally express clearly her position. She could fight for her own belief, something that himself was not sure that he was doing. One more look at her confident stance brought a smile on his face and he walked to his own scythe: «Tashikani. Kimi wa baka. (Indeed. You are an idiot.)» He realized a flip to quickly grab his scythe and putted it on his shoulder: «Junsuina kokoro to baka ni wa sonkei ni ataisuru. Anata wa tsuyoi hito. (Idiot with pure mind deserves respect. You are someone strong.)» He then lowered the scythe by extending his right arm and leaved it to hang beside him: «Sore ga riyûdesu… kôkai sezu ni tatakai e yo. (That is why… I can fight without regret.)»
He lowered his stance and stretched an arm toward her:
«Kurogane no Tsuki (Iron-Crafted Moon! Litt: Black-mineral "relation" Moon)»
His comprehension of her feeling also brought a smile on Sophie's face that took her aim. She whispered to herself "ii na (Good.)" and shot once Fitz had started to move. He had made a quick spin on himself while dashing toward her. He used that moment to conceal his scythe behind his body. She could not read his move from there on. He was already in front of her before she could confirm that her shot had hit. It then became a flash of light as he slashed his way through her and pain filled her being.
Once he had finished his rush, Fitz released his scythe that flew through the room and quickly turned around to catch Sophie. She felt in his arms with a wide cut through her body. Even so, she was still smiling. Fighting the pain, she lifted a hand to catch his cheek. Her resolution hasn't fade from her eyes as she said to him: «Shine koto wanai. Roido o mamoru suru hitsuyô ga imasu. Jishin kara kare o sukuu. (Do not die. You must protect Lloyd. Save him from himself.)» Fitz joined his hand to hers and kept listening: «Omae ga… Hontô sugoi. Kage no naka ni maigo ni shinai. Moshi Roido ni tatsu… Shin'nen ni shigatte kudasai. Junsuina kokoro o motte iru… mo. Onegai… Reikon ni uso o tsukanai. (You are… Really strong. Do not loose yourselves inside the darkness. If you are to stand by Lloyd… follow your belief please. You have a pure heart… Too. I beg of you… Do not lie to your soul.)»
Her vision seemed to cloud as life was slowly leaving her. She seemed to be somewhere else as she whispered: «Chichi wa… O'nii-sama. Issho ni… Sugu. (Father… Dear big brother. We'll be together… very soon.)» A pure smile, without any regret, formed on her lips as she turned her look one last time toward Fitz: «Arigatô, Fitsu… Eien ni… Suki da. (Thank you Fitz… Forever… I will love you.)» She closed her eyes while keeping her smile and it pushed the tears out of her eyes. With tears running from his own eyes, Fitz lowered his head to kiss her. He could feel her lips forming "sayonara" before her hand started to slide from his cheek.
Fitz did not know how much time he stayed clutched to her. He could not admit Sophie's death even if he brought it with his own hand. He had brought death before. Even often. He killed a lot of peoples when he was under the Blossom's Pirate rule. He could comfort himself by saying that he grew up surrounded by death. That it was a normal part of his life. That in its unavoidability he did not have to fear anything.
Yet, he was still feeling so utterly powerless in front of it. That with every person that was taken away, he too was also torn apart from his body. That he was cast into darkness. That anything could not make any sense anymore. That he was also facing the end.
However, this time… It probably was the first time that Fitz created such a strong bound with someone. Even if they spent very little time together, the managed to deliver their feelings to each other. They used this opportunity to free their heart of a weigh that was chocking them. They managed to understand each other's pain. Yet, they were forced to kill each other. All of this because of their position and wishes for this unfair world. After this, does life seems a lot more meaningless.
They both had nobody important left to them. They managed to create a bond, one that would allow them to see the life in front of them with a lot less darkness. Yet, she died… He killed Sophie with his own hands. He sent himself back into solitude. In this absolute void where no one could understand him. A place without any warmth. A place where silence ruled. He was destined to roam this land of nothingness by himself. Death was the only destination available. We shouldn't fool ourselves, this world is owned by death. We are only momentary struggle that are even not able to held the weight of absolute silence.
Fitz hoped that he could also fall into that silence. That all his current feeling and even his life-long pain could be dulled and lost into the endless ocean of silence. Opening his eyes would be useless; he was certain that he was already surrounded by complete darkness. His bleeding heart should turn cold soon. Nothing was holding him to life anymore.
A loud explosion shook the entire building. Inside his cold dark silence, Fitz could hear once more Sophie's voice echoing with the shaking wall: «Shine koto wanai (Do not die.)» That's right… She entrusted her wishes to him. In the end, she wished for Lloyd's ambition to realize itself even if her belief could not make her do so directly. And she had trust that he was the right man to do that. Even in front of her death, she looked for the future. She did not saw a void, she saw a bright future; that even if she was gone, she would still walk by their side. Upon realizing that, he came to a bigger realization. That death was not the strongest force. Sophie's will was stronger than death. Haven't he heard that a man life end when his dream die. He got aware of the true weight of those words.
Finding strength within himself, he freed himself from the lethargy that death tried to encase him into. He knew that as a human being, he was hollow. He grew up to have no one to bond with, to respect, to love. He always ended up in empty relationship that he wished to flee. He had been fleeing his whole life. He simply wanted to be free. But nothing backed his quest for freedom. He did not have anything that could drive him into becoming a better man. He had become relatively strong, but there were no ambitions in his mind. He always followed awful leader because he did not have self-desires. He would change that.
He would take Sophie's strong determination inside his empty heart. He would become strong enough until he could take it all. He would take it and use it to accomplish what he would believe that was right. With no strength to be found within himself, he would use hers to find what he yearns for. He would not simply hers over, that was not what she wished. She hoped that he could help Lloyd by following his own beliefs. His capt'n had big projects that could only be accomplished by men with strong determination. To change the world… And he also had the responsibility to make sure that it would be for the better.
It was time that he went and helped Lloyd then. That explosion earlier had to be his doing. He took a last glance at Sophie. Her beauty was still to admire even in death. He could not simply left her here and quickly came with and idea. He brought her weapons to her, but decided to keep her rifle as a memento. He crossed her arm over her pistol and turned back before tears would become too strong to resist. He would cry when it would be the time. For now, he opened and broke a good deal of the bottles of the bar. He made sure to scatter the alcohol through the room.
He simply needed something to start it up. He turned toward the body of the man that followed him. Another death that he would take the weight. But to him, it was now holding a different meaning. He would take the weight of his dream. He did not mind. He would become strong enough to shoulder them all. That man, he had spent some good time with him. They were both part of Yluseff's crew. They both followed this mockery of a capt'n because they lacked the will to follow their own desire. With Lloyd, he had the feeling that he could have him all his trust. He was not facing the same the same kind of men. Lloyd had gained his determination long ago.
With a smile, Fitz popped out a pack of cigarettes from the man pocket. He had stopped smoking a little while ago, but he absolutely needed one this time. He picked back his scythe, putted the rifle strap on his shoulder and lighted his cigarette. He then made the lighter run on the tables and the fires spread rapidly with the alcohol. Taking a step out of the room that was turning into a blaze, he expelled the smoke while saying: «Sayonara, Sophie… Matte kudasai Senchô (Farewell, Sophie… Wait for me capt'n.)»
Finally, I got through this chapter. I thought I could get through the rest of the Headquarter's Arc, but Sophie and Fitz part became a lot more important that I would have initially thought. I'm pretty satisfied of how it turned out. A faced a bunch of hardship while going through this final part. It wasn't easy to write at all. At some point, I decided that I could never make it perfect and managed to write the rest. That explains the slight delay.
I wanted to save Sophie. For those of you that liked her, I can assure you that I really wished to save her and I am the most saddened by her death. It's just that she would never accept what Lloyd will do and she stayed true to her belief. It is also primordial to Fitz's development. Since I putted a lot into that OC, I would be really pleased to know your opinion of her.
Speaking of Sophie, I mentioned for the song the character of Tsubaki. She is amongst my favorite character of Blazblue (A game franchise that I really love) with a really tragic story. I discovered her after creating Sophie, but strangely they have similar look and of course, Tsubaki's story really influenced Sophie for some points. I invite you to discover more about Blazblue and Tsubaki.
Beside that, tell me if you liked the Japanese's dialogue. I don't plan making whole chapters again (I wanted this chapter to be really special), but if you guys liked it, I can still makes certain parts. Like it or not, I'm gonna use it for some expression. ;P
So, next time, it will really be the new characters introduction along with Fitz new determination. It will be mostly fight, so I should progress smoothly.