Title: The Watson Files
Parings: Sherlock Holmes & John Watson (slash goggles optional)
Trigger Warnings: Canon typical violence and injury
Chapter 14 – Ensemble
None of the conference rooms at NSY were available so we were all crammed into Lestrade's Office; Sherlock, Mycroft, Not-Anthea, Lestrade and I. Even though it was decently sized for a single person government office the atmosphere was distinctly claustrophobic. This was primarily due to the fact that the Holmeses in the room were having an argument.
The whole thing had started when Lestrade had called Sherlock and I to help identify a body. All he had was a nude middle-aged male and a large amount of blood in a completely stripped and sanitized flat. Judging from the smell of industrial cleaner and the spotless nature of the room I could tell there wasn't going to be much, if any, physical evidence other than the body itself and the blood.
Sherlock had managed to deduce a number of details of the deceased's personal life and was starting in on the cause of death when Mycroft and his entourage arrived. While this solved the problem of identity quite handily, we were informed the deceased was a minor candidate for the House of Commons from Islington, it didn't do much to illuminate exactly how he had sustained the neck wound that resulted in his bleeding out on the floor.
Seeing both Holmeses examine the scene and the body was interesting. Sherlock would move, look intently, stop then move. Rinse and repeat. Mycroft on the other hand moved as little as possible, eyes scanning the scene intently as he leaned slightly on his umbrella. Sherlock ended up at the window and Mycroft turned to watch him. That, I think, is when the argument started.
In typical Holmesian fashion the argument began non-verbally. Mycroft sighed. Sherlock looked over his shoulder and raised an eyebrow. Mycroft stopped leaning on his umbrella. Sherlock exhaled forcibly and so on. Apparently Lestrade had been in a similar situation before because he somehow managed to get both Mycroft and Sherlock to agree to move to NSY and leave the forensics folks to do what they could.
By the time we had ended up in Lestrade's office the argument had escalated into partial sentences punctuated by insults both express, on the part of Sherlock, and implied from Mycroft. From what I could tell from the fragmentary conversation Mycroft was currently going on about maths and Sherlock's alleged lack of mastery of the subject.
That caused Sherlock to grumble "And I'm sure you know 'many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotenuse!'"
Mycroft looked insulted and Sally Donovan, who had just arrived with coffee all around, burst out laughing.
"Well if you are going there," she said as she put the carrier with the cups on Lestrade's desk, "I could round up the members of the office choral ensemble and have them do an impromptu performance of A Policeman's Lot."
I'm not quite sure what I was expecting from the brothers Holmes in response to that but it certainly wasn't what happened.
Instead of glaring at Sally, Mycroft and Sherlock turned to each other, "Epee!" they chorused together.
Author's Note: The quote and Sally's remark references the Pirates of Penzance by Messrs. Gilbert & Sullivan. Sherlock didn't delete it because it's all about pirates. Mycroft was in a performance of it during his schooling and played the role of Major-General Stanley. This, of course, explains Sherlock's comment in response to the insult. The original prompt was: Ensemble. Include or mention at least five canon characters in your fic.