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"Dead Man Walking"
Pacing back and forth, I mentally counted the seconds that it would take to pass within ten minutes. Ten minutes...ten whole fucking minutes. How could I have been so stupid to just let her go like that? I should have had more of a backbone and told her I was going regardless.
The whole car ride she had been mute, occasionally she would mumble different random things about Jackson, or so I was assuming. Nothing she said when put together made sense. One hour she was muttering about green and blue dinosaurs, another few hours passed and she spent it in complete silence. After that, she started shaking her head, eyes still closed, talking about somersaults and baseball.
I was left feeling more confused then I had at the start of all of this. All I could really deduce was that Jackson meant a lot to her, and for one reason or another, he was incapable of taking care of James by himself necessitating Bella's involvement.
Three hundred Mississippi, three hundred and one Mississippi, five minutes had managed to pass and still no sign of anyone from the house. I started to get even antsier than I was previously, starting to pace faster than before, not that it helped anything. What would have helped was telling Bella hell no and marched right up to the door with her.
In the middle of my mental bashing, I heard a noise off in the distance that made my heart stop. Looking off to the left, I could see in the distance a door open illuminating the yard before it. A figure made its way outside and was walking into the yard.
I started to jog the tree line towards the house, along the opposite side of the road. It wasn't very well lit, but I made it there faster than I had expected. Standing in front of the house on the other side of the road, I saw someone who looked to be a little less then three feet tall sobbing, head down, slowly making there way to the road.
Ok so Jackson was a kid. I had no clue how to get him to come to me.
The only light was coming from the windows in the house that he had just come out of. From the dim light, I could only really make out how tall he was and that he seemed to be crying hard. I made my way across the road towards the yard he was walking across so that I could grab him and run him back to my car. The sooner I got him to my car, the faster I could get back and get Bella.
Approaching the small form, I still couldn't make out what his face looked like in the dim light. I held my hands out and crouched down; I was doing everything completely on instinct.
"Jackson?" I saw his head instantly shoot up and he started to quicken his pace towards my voice. "Jackson, come here, your mommy sent me."
He was now running towards me and was in my arms before I knew it. I was thrown back by how perfectly he fit in my arms, and how familiar he felt, even though I had never met him before.
"My mommy, my mommy..." the innocent little voice crooned while rubbing his head back and forth on my shoulder.
"Shh, Jackson it's going to be ok. I will get her back I promise, ok?" I rubbed at his back and he nestled his little face into the crook of my neck, his hair tickling me.
Scooping him up, I held him tightly to me. I ran back towards my car and threw the back passenger door open. Climbing into the seat, he still had his little hands securely hooked around my neck. I slammed the door shut and looked around; making sure that there wasn't anyone else around. The interior light was still on. Jackson lifted his head from me and looked at me, finally giving me my first view of his face now in the more substantial light.
I felt my mouth fall open as I stared back at green eyes that mirrored my own. Pulling my head farther back, I looked at him closely. He looked identically like me, the only difference was that his hair was the same chocolate tint as Bella's; he even had a black eye that matched my own. My stomach turned at the idea of how a small innocent child got such a shiner.
"He is going to need you, you'll see, please."
The words that had finally broke my resolve, helping her get her wish of me staying by the car, kept playing over and over again in my head. Of course he was going to need me; there was no denying the paternity once you looked at him, "you'll see."
I have a son, a boy, who I don't even know. I had to quickly squash the anger that was bubbling up in me when I thought of how much I missed with him. If only I hadn't been a complete douche and had gotten off of that bed and chased Bella, I would know my son. I'd know his favorite color, his favorite meal, every little thing that was simply him, I had no clue. I lost out on so much with him because I was an idiot.
Headlights shinning through the windshield broke my gaze that was locked on Jackson, my son. I quickly moved him so that he was sitting in his own seat and started to pull his seat belt across him. I was intent on getting him out of there and then getting Bella, my papa bear instincts instantly kicked in.
There was a quick knock on the passenger window and I instantly shielded his body with my own. I looked over my shoulder, ready to kill James or who ever it was. Once my eyes finally adjusted back to seeing in the darkness, I saw that it was Emmett.
I let out a huge breath that I was holding and moved to open the door, lifting myself off of Jackson and reaching across for the handle. I felt a little hand grab my arm. Instantly, I locked eyes with him. He looked scared senseless, as he began to sob again.
"Shh, it's ok," I rested my hand on his head and tried to reassure him that I'd make sure that he never had another worry. "He's a good guy, I promise, he's friends with your mommy."
He began to nod his head. He seemed to be starting to trust me, but there was also a fresh batch of un-shed tears at the mention of his mommy, Bella. I felt like shit mentioning her, but I didn't know how else to show him that he could believe in me.
Reaching across the car, I opened the door and began to slide out to talk to them. As I climbed out of the car, I turned and looked back, watching Jackson curl up like Bella had done earlier. My heart broke all over again.
"Dude, what the fuck is going on?" Emmett kept looking at me and then back at Jackson.
"Where is he?" Alice came rushing over out of nowhere.
"Is Bella here?" Rose was running right behind Alice, heading straight towards me.
Alice shoved me out of the way and crouched down in front of the still open passenger door.
"Aunt Al, Aunt Rose he got mommy."
I pinched the bridge of my nose, hearing his voice made me want to either go on a murderous rampage, or curl up next to him and cry my eyes out.
"Aw, I know baby but don't worry." Alice said, her voice cracking at the end trying to keep her own emotions in check. She climbed into the car with him and held onto him.
Rose gently closed the door so that there was a little bit of a sound barrier, "You know he is yours ri-"
"Yes, of course." I quickly cut her off. I would never be able to go back to a life without Jackson after I saw him. There was no way.
"Did he do that to him?" she ground out between her teeth.
I knew what she was asking. She wanted to know about the black eye that the poor boy was now sporting. All I could do was nod my head, the thought of it still made me want to murder someone and get sick simultaneously.
"Jesus, Fuck," Emmett started to pace back and forth.
"I know Em, try having it be your son that got hit and the love of your life still trapped in that fucking house with him." I pointed towards the house in the distance that was still lit.
Emmett clasped a comforting hand on my shoulder while Rose slid into the car with Alice and Jackson.
"We will fix this."
I nodded my head agreeing, there was no way James would get away with what he did, but first and foremost, I needed to get Bella safely back in my arms.
Jasper materialized out of the darkness, "There is only one way in. We better move now."
He was always the tactical one when it came to playing hide and seek when we were younger, or when we got older, when we used to break into parks at night so that we could drink.
I opened the door to the car and was met with three sets of sad eyes.
"Stay here and lock the doors. We will be right back. If anything happens, honk and we will be over here as fast as possible."
"Ok." Both Alice and Rose said simultaneously.
Jackson looked down at the floor of the car. I could tell he was on the brink of breaking down again.
"Remember my promise, little man."
Little man seemed to be a fitting nickname for him. From what I could tell, he acted wise beyond his years, and physically, he was a smaller version of me.
Alice mouthed 'thank you' to me. I saw Jackson bob his head up and down, a small smile played at his lips.
I nodded my head, closing the car door. I started walking towards the guys who were standing on the corner, pointing towards where James was hiding out with Bella.
"Hey," I let my presence be known once I made it to where they were.
"Hey," they both said back in unison. Standing there next to them, gazing at the house, I started to rub at the tattoo of Bella's name. The material above it was soaked in Jackson's tears.
"I have to get her back, we need her back." I quickly threw a glance over my shoulder at the car.
"I know," Jasper stated while starting to walk down the road towards the house.
I started to follow, but was quickly stopped by Emmett's over sized hand grabbing my shoulder.
"Congrats, I think, I don't know if it's the right time to say that but-"
I nodded my head, cutting him off from continuing. I wasn't sure if he was congratulating me over being back with Bella or the fact that I had a son, the main thing on my mind was getting Bella back. He slid his hand off my shoulder, understanding that there was a bigger issue that we needed to get settled.
We both jogged over to where Jasper was walking down the road.
"The door is right in the front. I don't know if he has any weapons, but that is our only way in."
Once we approached the front yard, we avoided the parts that were lit up from the light emanating from the lit windows of the house. Creeping alongside it, the world was eerily silent. The mission impossible song started to play in my head as we tip toed along the wall, working our way to the front door. Everything seemed like something that should have been in a blockbuster film, not actually occurring in real life. We were following each other, single file, towards the destination, Jasper in the front, me in the middle, and Emmett was bringing up the rear.
The singing in my head eventually started to crescendo the closer we got to the door. Jasper turned and looked at me with a 'what the hell?' expression on his face. I just shrugged, I had no clue why he was looking that way at me. And then, as I listened closer to the singing, I realized it wasn't in my head at all. It was coming from behind me. I turned and glared at Emmett with a look that I'm sure could have been murderous.
"Emmett, Jesus!" I growled out at the singing idiot, somehow managing to control the volume of my voice to an extent.
"What?" He whispered, trying to feign innocence.
I felt my eyes bulge out of my head at him.
"Fine, fine, I'll shut up. Sorry, it was just too tense for me."
Jasper scoffed out loud and started slinking along the side of the house again, making sure to avoid the windows. Eagerly, I followed along, my heart hammering harder the closer we got to the door. Finally, we stopped, crouching right next to the stairs that led up to the front door. Luckily for us, there was no window in the door.
We all quietly stalked up the steps and I put my hand on the door knob. Letting out a shaky breath, I looked to Jasper and Emmett to make sure they were ready. Once I saw both of their heads nod in confirmation, I turned the knob. Thankfully, the door wasn't locked. Pushing it open, it let out a slight groan and a small squeak. We all jumped at the noise.
Stepping into the place, I looked left and right quickly, seeing that I was in the middle of a living room that opened up into a small kitchen on the right hand side. At the far end of the living room, I could see I single hall that must have led down to a few other rooms.
Quickly, I walked in. Emmett and Jasper followed right on my heels. Emmett went into the kitchen and started to look around in there, as I started to tear apart the living room looking for anything that could help us. Jasper went down the hallway and I could here him kicking a door open. I followed right after him.
Much to my dismay, there was no sign of anyone in the house other than the lights being on. Jasper headed back down the hallway shaking his head. Emmett was standing in the living room, looking as confused as I felt. We didn't see one single car leave, nor did we hear one. They had to be here, there was no other place they could have gone.
Looking around the living room, I saw a teddy bear dressed in a sports uniform thrown in a corner. I walked over to it. Crouching down to pick it up, I noticed that it looked well worn. I could have only assumed that it was Jackson's, something that he had before all of this shit happened. Picking it up, I clutched it close to my chest, inhaling. I couldn't help but notice it smelled like Bella.
"Arghhh!" I let out a guttural growl, I felt absolutely primal.
James broke the last shred of patience I had. He punched me, led me to believe he was with Bella, kidnapped her son...no kidnapped our son, hit him, and now, to top it all off, he was missing with Bella. I internally made a promise that when I set eyes on that man again, he wouldn't remain alive for long. He was a dead man walking.
"I don't know Edward, I swear we would have heard a car. It doesn't make sense." I looked over towards Jasper with an incredulous look. I didn't want to hear excuses, I wanted a resolution.
"Oh, oh I know!" Emmett was practically jumping up and down with the idea that had popped into his head.
Jasper looked at him expectantly, and I motioned forward trying to urge him to continue.
He turned and started to head down the hallway. Once he got to the start of it, he held his hands out mimicking a gun with his pointer fingers. Looking over to Jasper, I saw that we both seemed dumbfounded.
"Police! Come out with your hand's up!" Emmett yelled down the hallway, his voice echoed and resonated through out the shack. Looking over his shoulder he shrugged, "Hm, worth a shot."
"Really!?" I gritted out through my teeth. I wasn't angry at Jasper or Emmett, but they were there, a complete case of wrong place wrong time. "Are you fucking serious Emmett?"
I tightened my hold on the poor innocent stuffed animal in my clutches. I started towards Emmett intent on doing what, I wasn't sure, but I had the feeling that if I got the chance to smack something, anything around, I could potentially feel at least slightly better.
When Jasper noticed me moving, he put his hand on my chest, stopping my advance, and turned to face Emmett. He pulled the hand that he had used to stop me off of my chest, and clenched it into a fist, cracking Emmett in the jaw.
"You are lucky I punched you and not him," Jasper said while shaking out his hand that had just contacted with Emmett's chin. "He would have fucking killed you. Think before you act."
Emmett began to rub at his jaw. His shoulders were shaking with laughter, easing the tension that had been collecting in the room.
"You know dude, Robin would have never hit Batman."
I started to chuckle, I couldn't help it. Leave it to Emmett to be the comic relief in this situation. Jasper, shaking his head, started to laugh as well.
"Yeah, and you know Batman would never say the stupid shit you do."
The sound of a car horn echoing through the woods broke the lightened mood that seemed to be forming. We all piled out of the place, sprinting towards where Alice, Rose, and little man were. My arms were pumping up and down trying to will my legs to run faster.
Skidding around the corner, I was the first one to make it to the side road where the car was parked. Looking around, I saw that the doors were still closed. Alice was in the front seat honking the horn. I didn't notice any foreign cars or anyone standing by the car. I was confused as to why she honked.
Sprinting faster then I ever thought possible, I slid on the gravel, stopping in front of the driver's window. I started to impatiently pound on the glass while Alice fumbled with the door handle, clutching onto a still illuminated cell phone.
The door popped open and she thrusted the phone into my heaving chest. Crouching over, one hand was on my knee, I looked at the display of the cellphone clutched in my other hand while trying to catch my breath.
phone off txt u asap wit loc. Idk ~B
I flipped the phone closed and looked at Alice who was biting her lip, trying to keep from crying. I hadn't even seen Bella grab her cell when she got out of the car, but at least there was some way of having contact with her.
"What is going on?" Emmett's voice rattled the trees. He had just rounded the corner and was almost to the car. Jasper was a little ways in front of Emmett, making it over to the car before him.
"Is everyone alright?" Jasper asked clasping a hand on my back, trying to gain control of his breathing.
"Yes!" Alice shrilled while flinging herself out of the car and onto Jasper, "God I was so scared. I didn't.. I didn't know.."
He pushed her head closer to him and played with her hair while she sobbed, trying to comfort her. I had to look away, the scene making me feel insanely jealous.
I walked around the front of the car to the other side and opened the back passenger door. Kneeling down, my knees hit the road and loose gravel. A few random stones poked and stuck into my knees, but none of it really registered when I looked at the tear stained face of my son. Reaching out my hand, I gently cradled his little head in my hand. He jumped at first and I held my breath, afraid I had done something wrong, but then he relaxed and closed his eyes. I could feel my heart surge. I had never felt so in love with anyone before than at that moment, right then and there.
My thumb wiped across his cheek and gently removed the tears that seemed to have formed a stream, freely flowing down his face.
"Jackson?"
His eyes slowly slid open. Looking at my face, his little lip started to quiver again. Suddenly, I remembered I still had a hold of his little bear. Holding it up, his eyes suddenly lit up.
"Ardan!!"
Jackson sprung forward, grabbing the bear from my hand and pulled it into a bone crushing hug. Instantly, I smiled. Seeing him so happy made me feel happy.
"Can I pick you up?"
When I saw that he was nodding his head, giving me silent approval, I reached in and pulled him towards me. The little beloved bear never left his grasp. Grabbing a hold of him, I stood up and shifted him to my right hip. I kicked the car door closed and headed towards the loose grouping everyone was standing in.
Joining the group, they all looked at me. Alice sighed and rested her head on Jasper's shoulder. He looked at me with what seemed to be a proud look on his face. Emmett held a thumb up in approval while Rose looked over at us with a very caring and concerned look.
"Aw Jax, I didn't know Martin was here."
Alice and Rose looked down at the bear that I had previously thought was named Ardan. He must have meant to say Martin, but just couldn't pronounce it correctly.
"Yup, he found 'em." Jackson said proudly while removing one of his hands from the bear and slinging it around my neck. I leaned my head into his, the corner of my lips pulled up into a small smile.
"Well isn't he a good guy?" Jasper said in a sing song tone to little man.
I felt Jax's head nod up and down. "Wait!" he all but screeched out.
We all looked straight at him, wondering what had suddenly popped into his head.
"Who you? Aunt Ro, Aunt Al, why they huggin' you?"
I had to suppress the laugh that was beginning to come out of me when I saw the little hand that was holding onto his bear point out a little chubby pointer finger and motion between Emmett and Jasper. Alice and Rosalie covered there mouths, giggling quietly into their hands.
Emmett pointed towards me. I could see the gears turning in his head, trying to formulate a way to explain me, himself, and Jasper.
"He actually happens to be yo-" I shot Emmett a death glare, silently asking him to shut the hell up, but my silent begging was answered by the little form in my arms.
"Noo, I know him." Jackson stated like he knew for a fact. I looked at him wide eyed waiting for him to continue. "He know mommy, and mommy said he take care of me."
My eyes began to pool with tears. I didn't know what to say to that, or how to react. All I could do was nod my head in agreement. I'd do anything for him.
"You an you." His little finger stabbed at the air towards Emmett and Jasper.
"Jax, they are friends of ours, and they are mommy's friend too." He seemed to be satisfied with the explanation that Alice offered to him. "We should head back towards home and file a report."
"Can we?" I didn't know how the rules for Florida worked when it came to a missing person.
"What's the worse that can happen?" Jasper added "They tell us no and we go back in a few hours."
I agreed. We needed to get the law enforcement involved. I was going to need help if I wanted to get Bella back, and I sure as hell had every intention to do what ever I needed to.
"Jazz and I will go with you. I can show you where to go." Alice and Jasper started to head towards my car.
"Emmett, you and Rose are going to follow us right?"
He said a quick 'yeah' to me.
I headed back towards my car, Jackson still wrapped around me. Jasper was waiting at the back passenger door and Alice was waiting to get into the front passenger seat.
"Jasper, can you drive?"
I wasn't ready to let go of Jackson. He was the closest thing I had to Bella and he was my son. I already had missed too much of his life. I was not willing to let this opportunity slip by.
"Of course." He didn't ask why, which I was grateful for. I didn't know how to handle my newly found daddy instincts.
Climbing into the backseat, I gently sat Jackson down next to me and put my arm around him. He looked up at me with a smile on his face, but his eyes looked tired. All of the events of the day had obviously taken their toll. I put a little pressure on his shoulders, encouraging him to lay his head down on my lap. He did so with out putting up any sort of fight.
I was even more horrible then I could have ever thought. I had made Bella leave while pregnant and so young at that. No wonder she works where she does and didn't go to school. I fucked up so bad, but once we get her back, things will change. She won't have to do this alone anymore.
I couldn't believe Charlie never told me. I would always go and talk to him and see what he knew about Bella. Why wouldn't he tell me she was pregnant? I would have been in Florida in a heart beat/ I would have done whatever I could to get her to come back with me, or at least let me be a part of Jackson's life.
We had to get Bella back. There were so many unanswered questions I had, so much I wanted to know.
"Sooo?" Jasper asked while catching my gaze in the rear view mirror.
Alice turned and put her head in between the two seats.
"She would have told you, she just didn't want to see him hurt."
"I understand. I was horrible. She had no way of knowing, but I want him in my life now. I need both of them in my life." Everything I said was true. I had been a stupid teenager who couldn't keep his hormones in check and screwed up. I wouldn't have trusted myself either.
"Were you there when she had him?"
"No," Alice started to shake her head, her eyes seemed to drift off, lost in an old memory.
"We met right before Jax turned a year old. She doesn't ever really talk about that time. She said one time that she was alone when she actually had him. Renee was off with Phil for one of his games."
"Dammit," I grounded out between my teeth. I quickly looked down at Jackson. Thankfully he was still asleep. I fucked up royally, worse then I could have ever imagined.
"Man, you had no way of knowing," Jasper must have sensed that I was becoming more and more pissed at myself.
"Still doesn't make it right, Jasper."
"Yeah, but you are here now. I think that should count for something." Alice added.
"I guess," I didn't know how to comprehend everything that was going on with me. My sad miserable life had been turned upside down, and given a good shake for added effect.
"We are almost to the station."
Alice pointed off to a road to the left and Jasper turned down it. I didn't even realize a whole hour had gone by. I always thought the saying was time flies by when you having fun, not when you feel like part of you is missing and stuck in hell.
Hope you all like!! I know you all wanted a bigger reaction from Eddie but no worries it'll happen.. he's just a little preoccupied worrying about Bella.
Review pretty pretty please! As with last chapter I'll send you a little sneak peek of next chapter.. maybe some good ole Papa Eddie and Jax time!