Sorry if the excessive swearing in this bothers anyone. In my defense, the rating is t for teen. The swearing is why hahah.
It took Beatrice 30 minutes to find the console room this time.
The upside was, now the Doctor was going to introduce her to the Ponds! Which could go good or bad. Or worse.
Beatrice's anxiety must have shown on her face because the Doctor turned to her from where he was piloting the console and smiled.
"You'll get along wonderfully, don't worry!"
"Are you sure?" Beatrice asked, hanging onto the side railing to avoid getting flung to the floor during flight.
"Yeah," he enthused, "I'm sure of it!"
The TARDIS landed with familiar wheezing. Beatrice's heart couldn't help but skip a beat.
Before, when she'd met the Doctor, she hadn't had any time to think about meeting him. Everything had happened too fast to worry about what he would think of her. Now, with the Ponds, it was completely different. Beatrice had watched their lives for years. She knew intimate details about them. They knew nothing about her.
What would they think about her?
The Doctor went to open the doors, then stopped. He turned and quick as a cat bounded down the hallway.
"Doctor?" Beatrice called after him, freaking out a little.
"Hang on, I almost forgot, I'll just be a moment!" He responded, voice growing smaller and smaller.
Beatrice hung onto the railing for dear life.
Should she… wait here? Or go out?
No, absolutely not. She's having trouble standing.
Then, the unimaginable happened. The door opened and Amy and Rory Pond walked in. Rory was eating toast. They were talking about something but trailed off when they noticed Beatrice standing there, looking at them like a deer in the headlights.
"Uh, hi?" Rory asked, a little unsure.
"Hi," Amy said, less unsure but still confused.
FUCK! Beatrice thought.
"Um. Hi." Beatrice said.
Hi? HI? You sound stupid. Fuck!
"Who are you?" Amy asked, Scottish accent as strong as it was in the show. Something about her outfit looked familiar.
"Beatrice," Beatrice said, unable to say anything else.
"I'm Rory, and this is Amy." Rory said, "Do you… know the Doctor?"
"Why would she not know the Doctor?" Amy asked in slightly hushed tones.
"Well, I don't know," Rory responded, also hushed.
OH DEAR GOD THIS IS GOING HORRIBLY. Beatrice thought.
Miraculously, miraculously, the Doctor ran back into the room.
"Oh, good, you've met!" he said, acting oblivious to the personal crisis Beatrice was having in her head, "Bea's going to be tagging along for a while."
"Where did the two of you meet?" Amy asked, jumping up to the console.
"Kansas." Beatrice blurted.
Rory looked confused. He mouthed to himself, "Kansas?"
"Kansas?" Amy asked.
"You know, Unit, monsters, the usual." the Doctor explained, not really explaining anything at all. He continued before anyone could get a word in edgewise, "But anyways! I know just where to go now. How does everyone feel about the Day of the Dead festival, Dia de los Muertos!"
Beatrice perked up, "I like Day of the Dead!"
The Doctor winked, "Attagirl! But it would help if you don't get crumbs on my console, Rory!" he snapped, and shooed said culprit away.
Rory shoved what was left of the toast in his mouth.
The TARDIS whooshed into flight. Beatrice tried not to pass out.
It wasn't Mexico. Or at least, it wasn't Dia de los Muertos. Dust stretched out as far as the eye could see, speckled by the random cacti and tumbleweed. The sun beat down mercilessly.
"This… isn't Mexico." Beatrice mumbled to herself.
Amy heard her, "Definitely not."
"I wonder where, though," Rory added.
"Good question, Rory!" the Doctor bounced out of the TARDIS, "I wonder what will happen if we go explore."
Alarm bells went off in Beatrice's head. She didn't say anything.
The four of them (because it was the four of them now that Beatrice was with them, not three like it was supposed to be) wandered down a hill and over to what looked like a road. The Doctor and Rory started bickering about Rory getting crumbs on the console.
And then they got to the town.
"Mercy," the Doctor read the large sign, "Eighty-one residents."
Beatrice froze. She remembered; the TARDIS malfunctioning (or maybe not), the wild west town. The robot sheriff.
This was an episode.
MOTHERFUCKER.
Beatrice scrambled to keep up with the Doctor, Amy, and Rory as they crossed the small wall of sticks and stones and wandered into Mercy. Should she say something? Anything? Or would it make the Doctor angry?
God, what happens in this episode? Beatrice had only watched it once when it was originally released. How could she have been so stupid? She should have watched it a million times.
Wait, what comes after Mercy?
Dammit, why couldn't she remember? There was a town with a cyborg. The Doctor becomes sheriff, maybe. Or… not? He leaves town at one point, on a horse named Susan. Rory loses his charger. And… the townsfolk might turn on them?
Beatrice didn't need to remember the episode to know that things would go wrong.
The residents of the town were already staring at them with acidic glances from the safety of the wooden buildings. No one approached the four time travelers. Nobody offered an explanation for the electric street lamp outside the post office that sat sparking ominously.
"That's not right." the Doctor snapped his fingers and stated the obvious.
"It's a street lamp," Rory said.
"An electric street lamp about ten years too early." the Doctor countered. Okay, Beatrice didn't remember this part.
"It's only a few years out," Rory said.
"That's what you said when you left your phone charger in Henry the Eighth's en-suite." the Doctor said, slipping his sonic back into his coat pocket.
"Hey, Amy, didn't you marry him?" Beatrice said without thinking about it.
Amy and Rory didn't really take notice of the comment, Amy going "What?" without looking at Beatrice. The Doctor, on the other hand, turned with an alarmed look on his face.
"Beatrice," he said. "You can't do that."
What?
Oh. Oh, fuck.
Dread flushed through Beatrice's limbs. "Sorry," she said.
The Doctor rubbed her on the shoulder and looked her in the eye, "No future business, okay?"
"No future vision," Beatrice said.
"Wait, what? Future vision?" Rory asked.
God, this definitely wasn't supposed to happen. Why did Beatrice have to open her big mouth?
Amy noticed the people staring at them from dark corners, "Doctor, um…"
The Doctor didn't notice, instead still looking at Beatrice intently. She avoided his direct eye contact.
The wind whistled and swept dust into everyone's hair.
"Doctor." Amy insisted.
The Doctor didn't listen. He turned, one arm around Beatrice's shoulders, and sauntered off, in his own thoughts. Somehow, he'd gotten a toothpick and was gnawing on it, like they did in old cowboy flicks.
Beatrice worried. Where did the electricity come from? Was it important to the plot? Could she say anything now? Definitely not. Not after the Henry the Eighth mess up.
Everything felt a little like an amusement park, like stepping into the wild west version of Disneyland. Nothing felt real as the Doctor strolled up to the saloon and sauntered in, Beatrice right next to him.
Conversation stopped dead when they entered. The Doctor, ever oblivious, went to the bar.
"Tea. But the strong stuff. Leave the bag in." he drawled. He played with the toothpick in his mouth and got it stuck under his lip. Beatrice wondered if she focused hard enough, she might disappear.
"What're you doing here, son?" the barkeep, a pretty blonde lady, asked.
"Son?" the Doctor laughed, looked around, noticed nobody was laughing with him, and turned back to the lady, "You can stay."
"Sir?" an African American man in a nice suit stood, "Might I inquire who you is?"
"Of course, I'm the Doctor, this is-"
Everyone in the room stood up. Beatrice's heart skipped another beat. All this stress couldn't be good for her.
"No need to stand," the Doctor continued, "You see that? Manners. Oh," a bearded man in a ratty suit was measuring the Doctor's shoulders.
"Thank you. Er, But I don't need a new suit." the Doctor said.
"I'm the undertaker, sir." the undertaker said.
"Oh, fuck," Beatrice whispered.
"Language." the Doctor responded.
A young man in a brown suit and a bowler hat stepped forward. He said, "I got a question. Is you an alien?"
"Well, er, bit personal. It's all relative, isn't it? I mean, I think you're the aliens, but in this context, yes. Yes, I supposed I am."
The saloon erupted into movement. The Doctor was hoisted up and away, out into the sunshine, and Beatrice, Amy, and Rory were dragged after him.
Yeehaw, parders, welcome to mercy. i cant wait to make cowboy puns for the next few weeks and have absolutely zero people judge me, YEEHAW
Reviews:
That's Balderdash - I'm glad you liked it! I was worried it would be too weird hahah. I'm glad it landed.
Catlorde - the doctor was in it too, yeah! Shared camera hallucination hahah. I'm glad you liked it!
NoVacancyMind - omg i LOVE rory, he's so relatable. Were their reactions accurate enough here? And i should defs give britbox a try, i deeeefinitely want to watch the old eps omg that would be so much fun. Throwback to the time i was a baby fan and googled 'doctor who episode 1' and DID NOT get any good results lmao