Part II: CHAPTER 11—The Past is Never Dead
Finn gazed out the window of the Resistance shuttle as they left D'Qar behind. The entire fleet had vacated the base and was about to make the jump to lightspeed together. Finn didn't know where they were going. He wondered if anyone knew. No one talked after the funeral, so he just stuck with Captain Rex and ended up on the General's ship. Poe was flying his x-wing, and Chewie took the Falcon. Cass' ship was in the fleet as well, along with countless other fighters, shuttles, freighters, and miscellaneous craft.
After they hit lightspeed, Captain Rex came into the passenger area and joined Finn by the window. "You ever been to Bellistrie?" he asked.
Finn shook his head. "Is it safe there?"
"We have an ally in the queen. She goes way back with Rey's grandmother."
"You guys know everyone, don't you?" Finn crossed his arms and tried to get comfortable in his seat.
"Something bothering you, Finn?" Rex eyed him suspiciously.
"What?"
"You know she'll still be able to find us, right?"
"Yeah, you said that. It's just... everything seems all wrong. Han shouldn't have died and... I don't know."
"I knew a lot of guys that shouldn't have died. But they did. You wonder why you're still here when they're gone. There's no right answer. Just a lot of questions."
"I thought you were still here because you're just that talented."
"You got that from my story, huh? Well, you're not wrong." Rex smiled, nudging Finn's leg to make room on the bench.
Finn stared out the window, avoiding eye contact. "I shouldn't be here. I should have died."
"Have I mentioned you're an idiot? Death may find you soon enough; don't be eager for it."
Finn glanced at Rex in surprise. "What does it matter?"
Rex glared back at him. "I've seen enough people die to know it's never easy. You might think your life means nothing, but trust me, as someone who's been there to watch it go down more times than I can count, it always means something. Always."
Finn looked away again, feeling vulnerable and self-conscious and wishing he could crawl into a deep, dark hole. He hadn't meant to open the door for this conversation, to confess the dark thoughts that had always plagued him. Somehow, Rex brought it out of him without really trying.
"You know, until I rescued Poe from the First Order, no one ever so much as looked at me like I was human," he said, not knowing exactly why. "If my life means anything it's because of people like Poe and Rey and Han."
"And if you hadn't rescued Poe, we might all be space dust right now. Still think your life doesn't matter?"
Finn gazed out into the swirling space around them. "Why me? How did I get mixed up in all this?"
Rex laughed as if he found something very funny. "I'll let you in on s secret, Finn: I've been asking myself that question for 50 years. After a while, you just accept your role and do your best. If there's some greater purpose, it'd take someone wiser than me to understand it."
"That'd be great if I knew what my role was."
"Well, you're young. What are you in normal years? I can never tell."
"Uh, I'm not exactly sure. Nineteen, twenty."
"Young by most standards, anyway."
"Speaking of that..."
"Oh, I guess we have time for the rest of the story."
~oOo~
16 BBY
It was raining the day Cody left the Vengeance. Rex and Ahsoka stood under the wing of their small ship as Cody said goodbye to everyone. Luke was the hardest as he clung to Cody's neck and cried. Eventually, Captain Aurea was able to pull him away. Cody didn't appear to have a much easier time taking leave of the general, but he kept his composure and made a quick farewell. He ran the short distance through the rain to join Rex and Ahsoka.
"Just a little homecoming atmosphere," Rex joked as Cody wiped the water from his face.
"Yeah, I hate rain," Cody replied, ignoring Rex's attempt to lighten the mood.
"We'll try to make this as quick as possible," Ahsoka said. She turned to climb into the ship.
It was tight quarters, but no one complained. They all had the sense they were doing the right thing, but none of them liked it. Rex found that after weeks of searching with Ahsoka and considering the reason he was doing it, he wished she had never found him. Every time he looked at her, he was reminded of General Skywalker. Sometimes, his mind would play tricks on him, making him believe they were back in the war when everything made sense. It only made the realization that the general was dead more jarring.
It was different with Leia somehow. She still reminded him of her father, but Rex kept a firm grip on reality where she was concerned. He knew the reason he had to protect her in the first place was because her father wasn't there to do it himself.
The trip to Kamino was several hours long, leaving little to do but talk. At first, Ahsoka told them of her investigations into Palpatine's schemes. She seemed to have accomplished a lot in the past three years, though perhaps she'd been looking into the chancellor before the rise of the Empire. Rex had his own doubts after what happened with Fives, which was why they both removed their inhibitor chips.
Until now, Rex hadn't really done anything to fight the Empire. He still believed protecting the kids was the best thing they could do, but he had to live long enough to see Leia grow up. It wasn't a sentimental thing: he needed to keep her safe as long as he could for the future of the galaxy. Rex remembered a conversation he'd had with her mother years ago on the subject.
Padmé lifted the crying child and rocked her back and forth, silencing her cries. Rex was slowly learning what came so naturally to the young mother. Clones weren't supposed to be nurturing. They weren't supposed to think for themselves either, and Rex seemed to be doing okay on that front. So far, he had changed three diapers, much slower than Padmé or the nurses did. In spite of his clumsiness, Leia seemed to like him.
From Rex's perspective, she grew rather slowly, but Padmé complained that she was changing too quickly. And indeed, she did grow. Rex began to notice a familiar look in her eyes when she was trying to figure something out. Normally, she resembled her mother and, therefore, brought about no painful memories. But in those moments, Rex saw her father. He would do everything he could to make sure Leia didn't turn out like Anakin.
Rex considered all the influence his former general had possessed and wondered at anyone managing to escape it.
"What are you thinking about?" Padmé asked, breaking Rex out of his thoughts.
"Ahsoka," Rex replied, not sure when exactly she had entered the equation.
Padmé nodded understandingly. "I never thought I'd be glad she left when she did."
A sense of relief washed over Rex at the realization that his commander had surely avoided Order 66. He smiled. "She's alive out there somewhere. I hope she found peace."
"Knowing the injustice she suffered, the injustice the whole galaxy is suffering... I sincerely doubt it."
Rex considered the alternative. "Then she's fighting. Wherever she is, in whatever way she can, she's fighting."
Padmé frowned and placed the now sleeping child in her bed. "That's what I should be doing."
Rex waited until they were out in the hallway to make his reply. "You've had other things to worry about," he said.
Padmé sighed. "I know. I didn't think it was possible to feel guilty for spending time with my daughter."
"You spent your political career trying to stop this from happening. It's normal you want to do something about it."
"I'll feel just as guilty if I leave. But somehow, I think she'll be safer." Padmé stopped in front of a window. They did a lot of staring out windows these days.
"I never had parents," Rex said. "None of us did, just brothers and trainers. I've been told I missed out, but I'll never know the difference, so I can't tell you not to go because she won't get by without you. She will. We all get by."
Padmé crossed her arms and gave Rex a weary look. "That's not exactly encouraging."
Rex put his hands on her shoulders. "Then maybe this will be: whatever you choose to do, know that I will not let any harm come to her as long as I'm still breathing. She'll be safe, she'll be loved, and she'll be ready to save us all when the time comes."
Padmé looked back toward Leia's room. "She's just a little girl. All those expectations on her shoulders..."
"Oh, I'd never tell her she's got a destiny. That's a well-documented method to screw a kid up." Rex smiled.
Some of the tension seemed to fade from Padmé's features. He knew she was going to leave soon and start her fight against the Empire.
Rex just hoped he was ready to be a babysitter for the next 20 years. If he even lived that long.
"You're quiet," Cody said, jolting Rex back to the moment.
Padmé was dead, Leia was world's away, and the high thoughts Rex usually had toward Ahsoka didn't apply in person. He was spending too much time in the past lately. He needed to focus on the future again.
"What's the plan once we reach Kamino?" Rex said. "I'm sure there will be Imperial presence there."
"There's an abandoned lab where my contact is conducting his research," Ahsoka said. "It's far from Tipoca City, so we should be all right."
"Don't they monitor ships coming in?" Cody asked.
"Yes, but the lab has access to the Imperial systems. They can block us from sight long enough to get in."
"How did they manage that?" Rex narrowed his eyes suspiciously.
"I have my theories," Ahsoka said. "But I guess we'll find out when we get there."
"You haven't even been there yourself?" Cody asked.
"No, I've been in contact with them for a while, but it was too dangerous to come and go often. We get one shot at this."
"It might all be nothing," Rex said. "But she seems awfully sure."
"I am sure," Ahsoka insisted. "I wouldn't have spent so much time on this if I wasn't sure. Even if it is a risk, it's worth it to stop the emperor. If his new Vader is anything like the old one, we need any advantage we can get." She clearly wasn't happy talking about this, but she didn't shy away from the topic either.
"This can't be easy for you," Cody said. "And we appreciate the effort."
Of course it wasn't easy for her. Nothing was ever easy for any of them. Rex almost longed for the days of following orders mindlessly. But he had seen where that would have led him. Cut Lawquane had it right; there had to be a choice.
~oOo~
As best Rex could tell, the lab really was abandoned. It was dark from the outside, and they had to pry the doors open to get in out of the rain. It was a rough landing in the dark, and Ahsoka nearly put them down in the ocean a couple of times.
The three of them entered a long corridor, dripping in the silent space. There didn't appear to be anything living, but Ahsoka was on alert as if she sensed something. She reached for one of her lightsabers, using the silver blade to light up the hallway. The colorless light felt out of place in her hand, but it served to reveal the path ahead. There was damage to the walls and some doors as if the Separatists had attacked near the end of the war, and nothing had ever been repaired.
"It looks deserted," Cody said cautiously.
"Shh!" Ahsoka said, stopping in the middle of the hall. She swept around with her lightsaber, illuminating every dark corner she could reach. Nothing.
The silence was too deep. Something was out there.
A flash of movement from above drew Ahsoka's attention. She swung her lightsaber, but the figure twisted mid-air and kicked it out of her hand. It landed on her, knocking her to the ground in the dark. Rex's helmet lamps had broken two years ago, and he hadn't gotten them fixed since he hadn't needed them until now. He jumped at the figure in the dark, trying to find something to grab onto. It felt human and probably male, but he wasn't wearing anything loose enough to get a hold on. Ahsoka let out a sharp cry, and Rex resorted to grabbing the man around the waist and pulling him off her.
Ahsoka ignited her second lightsaber, and as his eyes adjusted, Rex came face to face with Cody's rifle aimed at the assailant stilled writhing in his arms.
"Stand down, soldier," Cody said, slipping back into his authoritative voice with ease. "We're not here to hurt you."
The man stopped moving, and Rex let him go. He was a clone but younger than Rex and Cody by at least a few years. He wasn't wearing any armor, just a tattered cadet uniform, and he had a pair of sharp knives still in his hands. He was stronger than he looked in the pale light of Ahsoka's blade.
She called her other lightsaber to her hand with the Force and put it back on her belt. "Didn't you know we were coming?" she asked.
The cadet shook his head. "I patrol the exits. I like the quiet."
"Where is your commanding officer?" Cody asked.
The cadet seemed hesitant.
"What's your name, kid?" Rex asked. "How long have you been here?"
"They call me Zed," he said. "I've always been here."
"My name is Rex. That's Cody and Ahsoka. We're looking for whoever's in charge around here."
Zed nodded. "This way." He retreated further into the dark corridor and they all hurried after him.
Ahsoka's breathing came in uneven gasps, and Rex thought he'd seen some blood on her tunic from Zed's blade, but they could see to that once they reached whoever ran this place.
The hallways wound back and forth into the heart of the lab. Rex kept a mental list of all the turns they took so he would be able to find his way out again if it turned out to be a trap. Gradually, the corridors began to lighten, and there were no blaster burns or broken doorways in this part of the facility. Ahsoka put her lightsaber away and focused on keeping pressure on her side where Zed had cut her.
The cadet led them into a cramped room full of medical equipment where they found another, slightly older clone hunched over a desk with test tubes scattered in front of him. He had long hair with a stark white stripe down the side, and he wore partial armor with blue markings.
"I found them at the west entrance," Zed told him. "They said they were here to see you."
The other clone looked up in surprise as if he hadn't heard them enter. "Oh, yes, you made it," he said. "Good, good. But you're injured. Here, sit." He stood and ushered Ahsoka over to an examination table. "Zed, get back to your patrols, and don't stab anyone else if you can help it," he snapped.
Zed nodded and left the room like a scolded child. Rex felt a little sorry for him, though he didn't entirely care about the feelings of someone who had just hurt his friend. Even if looking at Ahsoka still made him vaguely sick.
"I'm sorry about him," the clone continued. "We usually only have unpleasant visitors, and he's very good at protecting the lab."
"Who are you?" Cody asked.
"Well, that's rather obvious, isn't it?" The clone laughed as if at his own private joke. "But my designation is JX-4181—or Jax if you prefer."
"How long have you been here?"
"Oh, a long time. Well, long for us." He laughed again. He worked on patching up Ahsoka's wound as he spoke. "And you're the Jedi?" he asked. "The one who contacted me about the aging process? I take it these are the patients, then?" He nodded toward Cody and Rex.
"I'm not really a Jedi anymore," Ahsoka said. "But yes, they're the reason we're here. You said you were close to a cure."
"That's a funny way of putting it. It's more like unravelling a few strands of DNA and stitching them back together with different stuff. I am close. Very close. But it's a delicate process." He finished applying a bandage to Ahsoka's side and started putting away his supplies.
"How long have you been working on it?" Rex asked, wondering how close "very close" actually was.
"Oh, forever. Well, no, I was in the science program at first, then got into some trouble, asking too many questions, you know. I was going to be reprogrammed, so I ran and found this place. It was abandoned after a Separatist attack. Zed is one of mine. I incubated him here without all the brainwashing. Gave him some extra strength and fighting instincts. It was an experiment, but it paid off. He's green of course, but he keeps the lab safe while I continue my work."
Rex was beginning to notice that Jax didn't give a straight answer to anything, specifically with regards to how long he had been hiding in this lab and working on his accelerated growth antidote or whatever it was.
"I can't tell you how glad I am you're here," he continued, looking at Rex and Cody. "You're perfect candidates for the process once it's perfected. With just me and Zed, well, it would be more difficult to test the effects since we're younger."
"What do you need from us?" Ahsoka asked.
"Well..." Jax gave her an awkward look. "Nothing from you. You're neither clone nor human, so I can't say you'd be much help. However, I could do with a blood sample from these two." He glanced back at Cody and Rex. "And you could help me organize my research."
Ahsoka jumped down from the table. "Let's get started then."
~oOo~
The general's ship came out of hyperspace with a slight jolt. Finn glanced out the window to see a green planet approaching fast. At the same moment, Rex fell silent as if he'd reached a point in the story he didn't want to continue.
"I take it there's more to the story than just 'the process was successful, the end'?" he said.
"You got that, did you?" Rex replied, but he didn't elaborate.
"Thought you said there was time for the rest?"
"I must have overestimated the length of the trip."
The general's ship broke through the clouds to reveal the surface of Bellistrie. Hills covered in trees filled the landscape as far as Finn could see. The ship sped along parallel to the treetops until a city came into view. It sat amid the forest, seeming ancient with its brown stone buildings. One rose higher than all the others with towers and banners waving in the breeze. The ship docked in a hangar next to the castle.
Rex stood and picked up his helmet. "Ready to meet the queen?"
Finn observed the change in subject, but he didn't know how to challenge it. "Is there a choice?" he asked.
"Not really. She's quite friendly. I'm sure you'll like her."
That seemed a strange way to describe a queen, but Rex was a strange man if Finn's brief acquaintance were any indication.
General Organa led the way out of the hangar toward the castle as other Resistance ships began to dock behind them. Finn stared in awe at the high stone walls and ornate gates. Each guard tower was decorated with a blue flag featuring a bird in flight. The guards let them through the main gate, and they crossed a wide courtyard, paved with smooth brown stones and full of trees and flowers on either side of the pathway. Birds sang, and insects hummed. Finn didn't think he'd ever seen a place so beautiful.
A sense of sadness crept in, and he wasn't sure why. Maybe he was thinking of how beautiful Takodana and D'Qar were before the First Order showed up and made everyone have to run. He worried that might happen here too. The queen was taking an enormous risk allowing the Resistance to set up a base on Bellistrie. She must have been as remarkable as Rex seemed to think.
The ascended the stairs and walked inside. Finn felt strange walking with the general and Rex and other officers. Poe and Chewie were just landing, so he was on his own with all these important people. He hoped no one noticed him.
After a long, wide corridor, they came to the throne room. It was big, but the decor was only a few simple banners in the official colors. The queen sat on a low throne which was basically a chair with a high back. She had dark skin and thick hair piled on her head, and she wore a voluminous blue gown. Next to her, in an identical chair, sat a woman who must have been an adviser in simple clothes. She was a little older than the queen with gray hair and startling blue eyes.
The queen and her adviser stood and welcomed the visitors. "I'm glad you're safe," the queen said to General Organa. "We feared the worse until we heard from you."
The adviser scoffed. "Nothing can keep this lot down," she said in a voice that reminded Finn of a brasher version of Rey. She looked at Rex with a frown. "And just when are you going to convince your brother to come back to us?" She raised her eyebrows.
Rex shrugged. "His daughter might have more luck," he said, smiling.
Then, to Finn's utter astonishment, the woman stepped forward and hugged Rex as if he were an old friend.
"Your majesty?" General Organa said, drawing the queen's attention again. "I think I may have found what you've been looking for." She gestured toward Finn.
Suddenly the subject of a conversation he did not understand, Finn felt very small. "Y-your majesty," he said, attempting an awkward bow.
The queen approached him and put her hand on the side of his face. "Are you sure?" she said, scanning his face as if searching for a mark of familiarity.
"I sensed he was connected to you," the general said. "I can't be certain what it means, but..."
"He does look like Arturon," the queen finished.
Finn wanted to ask what they were all talking about. Everyone was staring. But his mouth had gone dry, and he couldn't form words. He could only stare back at the queen and wish she would stop looking at him so sharply.
She dropped her hand from his face and took his hand, gripping it tightly. "I see you don't understand," she said. "My name is Queen Janda, but my friends call me Birdie. I must ask you to do something for me. Then everything will be clear."
Finn seemed to remember her name from one of Rex's stories, but he couldn't put the pieces together right now. He merely nodded and hoped someone would explain all this.
I apologize for the unannounced hiatus. I ran out of new chapters and life got quite busy around the holidays. I will try to update more regularly in the new year.