Kili's laughter filled the area as he shook his head. "No! No, a dragster is specifically for drag races while a street rod, well the name should tell you everything."

Fili shook his head, concentrating on the task at hand. "Drag races are on straight streets, yes?"

The young brunet, still grinning, shrugged. "One's legal and on custom built drags. The other is just a race on the streets and you can get busted."

"He's tickling you. He knows what a hot rod is." Legolas leaned against the trunk of the shade tree, eyes closed as he smiled and patted his stomach as it growled.

Kili's eyes rounded while Fili grinned sheepishly. "Bofur and Dwalin snuck me out to the stock car races last year. It' the new thing. They used a converted old greyhound track. Uncle Thorin didn't even get that angry. I think he was jealous he'd missed it, being out of town."

The young brunet nodded sheepishly. "I want the 55' Chevy flatty with top chopping, channeling with frenching so she runs smooth and can blow off."

Fili's blue eyes stared a moment, then he snuck a quick look at Legolas. Both boys took a beat and then started laughing at themselves. "That's Greek to me." The older brother admitted rather ruefully.

Legolas snorted. "I speak and write perfect Greek, thank you. That meant nothing to me!" He sighed, while his stomach growled once more. "I'm hungry. Built up an appetite today."

"You ditched sailing." Faramir was lying back in the grass, his hands laced behind his head, the very picture of relaxation. "Dodged it entirely and we've done as little as possible."

Legolas grinned with pleasure. "Yes, I did. That doesn't mean I didn't build up an appetite. As for sailing, I simply don't like the sea."

"You live on an island." Scoffed Ori as he sketched on a large pad, peering out over the landscape. "And you're at camp …on an island."

"I'm haunted by islands." The blond Greenleaf heir groaned lazily. His stomach made its presence known yet again. "I wonder what's for supper, we missed dinner."

Kili looked up from where Fili was awkwardly trying to fletch an arrow, his tongue caught humorously between his teeth. "We haven't had dinner yet."

"That's what I said. We skipped it." Legolas nodded, his eyes still closed.

"No, I mean we skipped lunch. Dinner is in about a half hour." Kili said, then shook his head as his brother reached for the glue.

Fili sighed, realigning the small shaft he was working on. "I hate archery." He groused. "Give me a good smithy and a hammer."

Kili looked startled. "You work with metal?"

"Made all my own blades. Thorin taught me, none better!" Fili announced with no little pride, his chest puffing out. "Balance is the thing."

"I wish I could make my own blades." Kili said wistfully.

Legolas frowned, ignoring the talk of metalworking. "Dinner is the main meal of the day, then a later repast is supper. The evening meal."

"Got it backwards. Mate." Ori said in a fake British accent, drawing a chuckle from Faramir.

The teen from Gondor shook his head, still lying on the ground. "I don't care what it's called, I'm hungry too."

"What'd you dodge?" Legolas asked, the very picture of relaxation.

"Canoeing." The younger teen said before sighing. "Boromir will ask me why. Later."

"Tell him you were helping us." Kili said, trying not to laugh as the fletching fell off of his brother's arrow in a glued together clump.

Fili groaned and dropped the shaft in frustration, holding up his hands in the traditional sign for giving up.

"No, you were almost there!" Kili encouraged.

The blond laughed and threw the clump of feathers at his younger brother, where they stuck to his nose for a second before falling to the front of his shirt. Ori laughed at the sight.

"I hope they have a nice curry tonight." Legolas said, his mind still clearly on his empty stomach.

"What's a curry?" Kili asked idly, swiping the clump of feathers off of his shirt and trying to flick them off his fingers but they were clinging stubbornly.

Legolas' eyes popped open in surprise while Fili simply stared unblinkingly. Unconsciously together they turned their gazes toward Ori, who merely shrugged under the scrutiny. "Never heard of it." He admitted ruefully.

"Indian food, though Britain seems to have adopted it." Faramir said, still redolent on the soft grass and stretched happily.

"Indians?" Kili crinkled his nose with surprise. "As in buffalo and jerky and fish?"

"Indian, as in from India. Curry. You know …curry." Legolas seemed to be at a loss as how to explain what simply was a staple food group in his home country.

Ori smiled and turned the page in his sketchpad. "I'm putting that on the list of things Kili has to try once he's in London."

"Give over." Fili groaned. "Not that again. No way can we switch places. Though I'd love to see America and eat steaks as big as plates."

"You keep going on about the steaks." Kili said, his attention on the arrow shaft his brother had abandoned, basically a stick since it had no fletching nor any sharp head. He held it up with and poked Fili's shoulder with one end. "What you need is a good pizza."

Fili's blue eyes blinked, unsure. "Pizza?" He asked, looking at Legolas to see if the other youth knew the word. The blond practitioner shrugged, also at a loss.

"Don't tell me you've never had a pie!" Ori looked horrified.

"Fruit or kidney?" Faramir asked, finally sitting up, intrigued.

"Pizza! Pizza pie." Kili said with great deliberation. "And there's no such thing as a kidney pie." He scoffed.

"Yes, a piece of pie." Legolas spoke with a confused look on his elegant features. "We have pie in the UK. Have you ever tried kidney pie? Or pie and mash? Jellied eels?"

"You've eaten those?" Fili asked of the dish peculiarly for Londoners. Legolas shrugged and shook his head that he had not.

Ori laughed at first, then sobered as the Brit simply raised his eyebrows. "Really? That's not a joke? Kidney pie?" He made a face at the very idea. "Eels?" His voice dropped into a whisper.

"Put kidney pie down on your list of things for Kili to try." Faramir pointed at his friend.

The fourteen year old brunet immediately protested. "Hey! Don't bash my ears and give me gross stuff while I give you paradise on earth! Pizza is boss!"

"It's not gross." Fili said soothingly. "Seriously, you've got to try it. I'll try your pizza pie if you'll try a steak and kidney pie."

"When we switch places?" Kili mocked and pointed at his brother with the arrow shaft. "You said it would be impossible."

Fili shook his head sadly. "Not impossible, but very difficult." He grabbed the end of the wooden arrow and tossed it away from his brother's reach.

"Names on your passports are only one letter different." Ori commented, having been mulling over the idea all night and day. "You just take your tickets to the counter and say the issuing airline got it wrong. They'll fix it for you. Easy as …"

"Don't say pie." Legolas deadpanned, drawing a laugh from everyone.

Fili rolled his shoulders, a bit depressed at the thought of the end of the summer camp. "Look, if we could make it work I'm all for it."

Faramir tilted his head to the side, eying the older teen. "Where are the problems?"

The blond Ereborean prince nodded as he spoke. "Okay. It takes about nine or ten hours to fly from here to London, right?" Everyone but the two American's nodded. "But Ori, you told me it only took about six hours to get here from Los Angeles." He grunted as if the answer was obvious.

Kili shook his head, his braids swinging with the movement, the point lost on him.

Legolas though, groaned as he collapsed back against his tree. "I get it."

Fili smiled sadly over at his younger brother. "Frerin will figure out we've switched the moment he sees me and not you. All he has to do is call London and have solicitors and private guards and the such stake out Heathrow and wait for your arrival. Intercept you as you get off the plane. Throw you on the next States bound flight. Boom. He's got both of us. Worse? What if Thorin is actually there to meet me? What would they do if they saw each other?"

Kili paled. "Uncle Frerin wouldn't do anything like that." Speaking with a suddenly hoarse voice.

"Wouldn't he?" Ori said morosely, suddenly looking deflated. "Bad custody battle? Fighting for both of you for fourteen years?"

"He's not like that." The young brunet closed his eyes tightly, then shook his head. "I thought he wasn't. Then again, I never thought he'd lie to me my whole life either."

"No worries. Uncle Thorin would do the same if your plane got in later than mine." Fili sounded rather bitter as well. "It's not like we're identical twins or some such nonsense. Even if we dyed our hair, I'm not shaving my beard and …"

"I get it." Kili interrupted rudely, looking sullen and cross all of a sudden. "But I really wanted to go to Britain and meet Uncle Thorin."

Ori tapped the stub of his pencil on his list. "No. There's a way, and we will come up with it. In the meantime, I'm making this list. Kili needs to try kidney pie and Fili needs steak and pizza."

The other boys fell silent until Kili shook himself deliberately, forcing a grin. "And hotdogs."

Legolas sat back up, a strange look on his face. "Hot …dog?"

Faramir laughed at the blond's lost look. "Sausage. It is an American sausage I think."

Ori shook his head. "No, it's …a hotdog. On a bun with chili and cheese and onions."

Fili went pale, his jaw dropping. "Onions on a cake?"

"Cake?"

Faramir groaned and rolled his eyes. "Bun. Cake."

"Bun. Bread. Roll." Kili clarified to the great relief of his brother. "You'll need to drink coffee and soda too, very American."

"Alright, I know about soda at least. We call them fizzies or pop, but same thing." Fili nodded, then smiled. "You'll need to try cottage pie and bangers and mash."

Kili shrugged gamely. "Not sure what those are, but they sound better than kidney pie at least."

"Bubble and squeak." Legolas said suddenly.

"Definitely!" Fili turned to his friend with a grin. "Love that, and toad in the hole."

"Peanut butter and jelly sandwich." Ori muttered, writing it on his list for the blond.

"We have jelly." Faramir frowned while both the British youths nodded. "Never thought to put it on a sandwich."

"I've heard of peanut butter." Legolas sounded clearly unsure of the substance. "Ground peanuts, on bread?"

"Never had a jelly sandwich?" Kili seemed appalled.

Fili shook his head silently while Faramir furrowed his brow. "Aspic molds, yes?"

Ori blinked and shook his own head back at the boy from Gondor. "Aspic?" Suddenly he grinned. "Jello! They're thinking it means jello!"

"No?" Faramir asked.

Ori shook his head. "Peanut butter is a near perfect food and jelly is just mashed up berries and such."

"Jam." Fili closed his eyes and nodding. "But if I have to try peanut butter, then Kili has to try marmite."

Legolas grinned evilly.

"Clotted cream." Faramir chimed in. "He'll like clotted cream."

"Of course!" Legolas suddenly groaned, licking his lips. "Oh, and he'll have to have roast beef and Yorkshire pudding. Shepherd's pie."

"Cottage pie!" Fili announced, getting excited.

Ori shook his head, busily scribbling down all the suggestions. "You already mentioned that one."

"Butterfly cakes and jam tarts." Fili laughed. "Not jelly. Jam."

Legolas shook his head. "Add piccalilli and Branston Pickle."

"I like pickles!" Kili grinned.

Faramir laughed. "Branston Pickle is made from a variety of diced vegetables."

"You'll love it." Fili promised, crossing his chest with one finger over his heart like a schoolgirl.

Kili crossed his eyes at his brother. "You're having me on!"

"Am not." Fili avowed then sniffed suddenly as he pointed over at Ori. "Turkish delight! Can't miss that one."

"Truth!" Legolas grinned at his friend. "Walnut whip, scones, and apple crumble, and spotted dick!"

Ori started to write it all down, then furrowed his brow. "Very funny." He groused sourly. "Pull the other leg why don't you?"

Fili laughed, delighted at the reaction as Legolas grinned. "It's a dessert. Spotted dick. Delicious."

Kili glanced at Faramir who shrugged, his palms up as if to say he had no clue. He shook his head as his expression darkened. "Not for an instant." He glared at his brother's cabin mate.

"He's telling the truth." Fili said, shoving his younger sibling's shoulder. Kili shoved him back as he stuck out his tongue. "Very mature."

Ori's eyebrows rose. "You're bringing up maturity after your little dick joke?"

"Did you just call him little?" Legolas said with a haughty expression which badly masked his amusement, as he gestured vaguely at his lap.

Fili pushed Kili again, harder this time though still laughing. The young brunet set his jaw and then grinned right before tackling his still seated sibling. The blond roared with laughter as he rolled on top of Kili, patting his cheeks tauntingly in mock slaps. "Spotted dick!" He crooned, baiting his brother. "You'll eat it and like it!"

Kili growled even while he laughed and tried to throw off his brother unsuccessfully.

A sharp whistle had them all stopping, looking up. Boromir and Eomer were watching them all without expression. "Problem?" The counselor from Rohan asked politely.

Ori shook his head. "Discussing American cuisine …and what the British pass off as food." He paused, gauging the two counselor's expressions, then smiled gamely. "Just joking."

"Spotted dick." Legolas' eyes sparkled with humor, his lips twitching as he enunciated each word precisely.

Boromir sighed while Eomer nodded. "Love it. My younger sister makes a great one and yes, I'm aware of the unfortunate connotations. And if any of you tykes decide to make a joke about my sister be aware I will make you eat the grass you're lying on."

Kili blinked rapidly, losing his grin for a moment as he stared up at the tall blond Rohiran. "You mean it's a real thing?"

"Absolutely real, and absolutely delicious and on the list for you to eat when you …" Legolas coughed as he tried to cover the almost slip. "Er, when and if you ever get to visit London."

"Indeed." Boromir gave them all a friendly smile, then held a note out to Fili. "Here, there was a call for you at the main camp office."

Kili looked over the area, then grinned mischievously. "Look! There's the headmaster. Hard to make us eat grass when Gandalf is right there." He waved enthusiastically thought the gray-maned male was too far away to hear them talking. "Your sister stuffs you with …."

"Say it and die." Eomer interrupted while poor Faramir's face went red, then purple and he burst out laughing.

Boromir sighed, shaking his head. "Okay. We can't make you eat grass at the moment. But on your feet. It's time for a course."

Faramir slowly rolled over on the ground, looking up at his brother. "It' time to go eat."

"Not anymore." Eomer said ominously, he glanced behind himself. Straightening as he saw Gandalf approaching, having been summoned over by Kili's waving at him. "Sir."

"And a good evening on you all." Beamed the headmaster, looking at ease. "Ready for a good meal?"

Boromir gave an engaging smile and shook his head. "Actually we're heading for the obstacle course."

"Oh?" Gandalf queried, more than aware that most of the campers used 'The Gauntlet' as it was called as a mean to settle disputes.

"Kili made an unfortunate reference to my sister's honor." Eomer said will ill grace.

"No, really?" Gandalf peered down at the still supine young brunet.

"Is spotted dick a real dish?" Kili asked bluntly, still grinning from ear to ear.

"It is. And quite a good one too." Gandalf announced. "With custard is best."

Kili and Faramir descended immediately into unfortunate giggles.

Gandalf sighed. "Happens at least once in every summer." He shook his head chidingly. "American humor."

"There's no such thing." Eomer pronounced coolly.

"Not American, actually." Faramir held up one hand weakly as he struggled to bring his laughter back under control.

"And you should know better." The Rohiran nodded, looking toward his own friend for support. But Boromir's eyes were filled with mirth and he was fighting his own battle not to start laughing. Eomer sighed. "Not you too."

The older brother from Gondor shrugged, shaking his head as if he couldn't help himself. "Remember the kid from last summer who said, 'you are what you eat' and then he …."

Gandalf held one hand up. "Let me stop you there, before the joke gets the best of you. All of you, to 'The Gauntlet', now if you please."

Legolas moaned. "I said nothing! And we're hungry."

The camp's headmaster just nodded and sent them on their way, but not toward the mess hall. "Perhaps it is best if you all run off some of that unfortunate energy and humor."

o.o.o.o.o

o.o.o.o.o

"You're up to something." Lord Peredhel said, quietly announcing his presence as he walked up beside Gandalf from behind.

The gray-maned male puffed on his pipe, sending up a perfect smoke ring. He watched the misty vapor rise and widen until dissipating before answering. "Who me?"

A slight scoffing sound escaped his employer. Elrond watched as Erestor finished packing the large baskets with foods. "An evening picnic?" His tone left his doubt evident.

Gandalf shook his head, smiling fondly. "Boys being boys. Sent them to run it off on the obstacle course. They missed the evening meal."

"Ah." Elrond nodded. With young men that sort of event happened more frequently than he might have liked. "Who? The Dutch lads? I had to send them out that way myself last week. Don't tell me they are still at it?"

"Greenleaf, both Durinsons, Rison, and Boromir's younger brother."

Elrond stilled for a moment, then sighed. "Now I do know you're up to something. I thought it would end with young Beorn away."

Gandalf heard the slightly sour tone of voice and responded. "More troubles and travails with Azog's lawyers?"

"The authorities are satisfied that Beorn had been released by us without incident. That his disappearance took place at the airport and not on camp grounds. With none of our personnel anywhere near."

The headmaster made a soft noise of satisfaction in the back of his throat, drawing once more on his pipe. This time the smoke ring looked vee shaped. A not so subtle symbol for victory.

Elrond wafted his hand through the lazily rising smoke, turning on his trusted friend. "I want to know what you're up to and …" He paused, his eyes blanking for a moment. "Both Durinson's and Rison? They're done hiding their names from each other?"

Gandalf tapped the stem of his pipe idly against his bottom lip even as he nodded. "Happy and snug, learning all about each other." He announced.

Lord Peredhel's left temple throbbed for a second, then he looked away with a stifled curse under his breath. "You won't rest until the world map is changed, will you?"

"Mordor will rise." The gray-haired male said with deliberation. "That despot needs to have no friends, no allies."

"You think Smaug will align with Mordor?" Elrond asked, a bit surprised. "I thought him more the solitary type."

"Is that even a chance worth taking?" Gandalf at last turned his earnest gaze onto his employer. "Smaug is letting Mordor station troops. No matter his words of neutrality, it is too close for comfort."

Elrond couldn't help the shiver of unease that rode over him at the thought. "Indeed. But …freeing Erebor will not be easy and could push Smaug even further into Mordor's influence."

"Perhaps." Gandalf said, hearing the warning clearly even if he did not take it to heart. "In the meantime, fate has delivered us two Durinson heirs. We did nothing to put them together."

Elrond sighed. "You had a hand in this, of that I am sure. How?"

Gandalf laughed. "Oh?" He asked, though not addressing his employer's question. He puffed away happily on his pipe, letting the moment go as easily as a smoke ring.

o.o.o.o.o

o.o.o.o.o

Legolas groaned as he laid back on his bunk when the knock on the door came. He waved one hand toward the entrance. "Come!"

Erestor peeked inside, then grinned at the muddy, dirty, exhausted young campers draped over bunks and chairs as if they were spent. "Food." He announced, putting down two large woven hampers.

Fili cracked open one eye, his sapphire gaze baleful as he considered his options. "Move or starve."

"Thank you." Faramir said to the ceiling, not even looking at Erestor as the man left them to their misery.

Kili leaned against Fili, letting his older brother prop him up and keep him from hitting the floor he was sitting on. "I wonder if they packed spotted dick?"

Multiple groans from the entire group.

"I think I pulled a muscle." Ori winced, trying to stretch out his leg while perched on Beorn's empty bunk.

"Only one?" Complained Legolas. "Wimp."

Faramir sighed and managed to sit up in a rolling motion, drawing protests from the others as they watched. He grinned proudly. "Boromir set a new Gauntlet time to beat."

"You beat the old score." Legolas pointed out as Faramir opened the first hamper. The blond managed to sit up as the younger boy pulled out thick ham sandwiches. "Here."

Faramir tossed one to Legolas and then held one out to Fili. "There's cold chicken too."

"Sounds great." Ori sighed, rolling onto his side as he toed off his shoes.

"Salad." Faramir announced, looking into a container. He looked up. There were no takers. Grinning, he tossed it aside with little fanfare.

"Chips?" Ori asked hopefully.

"Crisps." Fili and Legolas said in unison with Faramir as they shook their collective heads at American's odd way of naming things.

"Right. Have any?" Ori smiled as a bag was thrown his way. "Cloud 9." He said happily.

"I need a wash." Fili announced, pushing Kili aside to lean on the bunk post so the younger teen wouldn't fall. "Don't want to eat mud with my food."

Kili pushed off his dirt encrusted boots with a grimace.

"Do that in your own cabin, mate." Legolas groaned, pulling himself up to go and wash up as well.

"Why?" Kili groaned, wiggling his toes. "I think Eomer broke a few when he landed on them. On purpose."

"You insulted his sister." Faramir said rather snottily. "I would do the same if you insulted my brother."

"The same brother you were trying to knock off the balance support?" Hooted Fili with a grin.

"All's fair in love and winning." Faramir announced. "So says my father."

"My father feels much the same." Legolas said, drying off his now clean hands as he came out of the lavatory.

"Thorin."

"Frerin too, mostly."

"Dori, he's all about good manners. But not in letting someone walk all over you." Ori grinned, speaking around a mouthful of food. "Says someone is always willing to cheat you."

"Nori." Fili grinned. "Nori will cheat you every time. He's all about the winning."

Ori's eyes widened, but sensed nothing derogatory in Fili's attitude toward the brother he was dying to meet. Gamely he nodded to show he understood.

"Never play cards with Nori." Fili said, settling back down next to his brother. Kili moved to lean against him again, making the blond grin at the affectionate display. "Make note."

"Never play cards with Nori." Kili parroted.

"And go wash your hands." The blond told him.

"And go wash your hands." The fourteen year old deliberately repeated with a small smile, waiting for the response.

Fili jostled his shoulder, making the younger boy mumble a protest. "Too tired. Besides, dirt is natural. Healthy."

Legolas rolled his eyes as he watched Faramir get up to clean himself off. "Lazy bones."

Fili held his ham sandwich out in front of his younger sibling, taunting him with it just out of reach. Kili groaned and made a grab, missing.

"Go." The older blond told him.

Kili opened his eyes fully, glaring at his brother as he stood. Then he flashed a quick grin and grabbed the sandwich, rubbing it with his filthy hands and dropping it back into Fili's lap. "I'm going, I'm going!" He yelped as his brother made a grab for his legs.

"Ew." Fili tossed the sandwich aside. He leaned forward onto his hands and knees and drew the second hamper toward him. He peered inside. "Frosted." He pulled out the chicken with a sigh of pleasure. As he sat back, a piece of paper fell out of his pocket.

"What's that?" Kili asked, coming back to join them having washed not only his hands but his face as well. He sat down next to his brother as the blond picked it up. "Your message."

"Forgot about it." Fili opened the folded piece of paper, curious. His face suddenly clouded.

"What?" Kili asked, immediately alarmed.

Fili looked up, his expressive eyes going from his brother to his new best friend. Legolas' eyebrows rose in inquiry. "Thorin. He wants to know how I'm doing. If I need anything."

Legolas gave him a questioning look.

Fili shrugged almost guiltily. "I didn't write him last week."

Kili nodded, letting the moment go.

Legolas, however, sent his friend a piercing look. The Greenleaf heir knew Fili was lying. They'd mailed their letters back home out together. Just like they had each week. "Of course." He said blandly.

o.o.o.o.o

o.o.o.o.o

Legolas managed to wait until everyone was back in their own cabins. The bugle call for lights out sounded right on time. He waited for his cabin mate to climb into bed in the dark, on the bunk below his. "What?" He whispered.

Fili didn't answer right away, letting the quiet sounds of outdoor living fill their cabin. Finally he sighed lightly. "Thorin heard about Beorn's disappearance. He's not sure it's a safe place for me."

Alarmed, Legolas stared up at the ceiling with a scowl. "He wants you home early?" He guessed crossly.

Fili shook his head, though his friend was on the bunk above him and couldn't see. "Wants my take on security. If I want to come home or think it's unsafe, to let him know."

"He lets you make the call?" Legolas asked, starkly surprised. His father would just tell him what to do.

"Thorin trained me." Fili said without further explanation.

Legolas nodded in the darkness, thinking it through. "Doesn't sound bad. Just let him know you want to stay."

"I will." Fili agreed rather sourly. "But what about when summer ends? I just found him."

Him. Kili. A younger brother. Legolas felt a pang of envy. His sister was great and all, but she wasn't here. "You didn't like him."

"Everything's changed." Fili said into the quiet of the night. "He's my brother. And …I don't want to lose him."

"What's the plan?" Came the immediate and supportive response.

Fili grinned, the flash of his teeth visible to no one as he realized Legolas would stand with him. Thranduil's son a friend, who'd have guessed? "If we did switch places, then we'd have to be switched back. Make Thorin and Frerin be in the same place at the same time. Talk to each other."

Legolas nodded even as his mind stumbled over the details. "You said it yourself, there are problems with that plan."

After a lengthy silence, Fili cleared his throat. "Beorn had problems." He said slowly.

Rather taken by surprise, Legolas rolled over and hung his head over his bunk to look at the other boy. Fili grinned to see the great fall of long blond hair hanging down from above, framing wide eyes. "Mr. Baggins?"

Fili nodded at the other boy with great satisfaction, pulling his covers up as he yawned. "It seems to me, that we have an opportunity. And a resource."

Legolas stared for another minute, then firmed his lips as he rolled back onto his own bunk. "Just who is Mr. Baggins?"

"I don't know who he his." Fili admitted. "I just know we need him."

o.o.o.o.o

o.o.o.o.o