Disclaimer: I wished I owned the Twilight series but I don't.

Credit for the Rules go to Bruce Cameron

And will yall please tell me if you like long or short chapters, I'll do some of both but I want to do want yall like!

Review or PM me if you want to ask or suggest something for this story.

And i can't forget

Happy Labor day! :)

Now onward to the story!

Once we were on the road, I became nervous instantly. Paul tried soothing me by saying everything will be okay but it didn't help. My dad and brothers can and will do some crazy things. You don't even want to know what all happens at my house.

I called my mom to make sure that she knew we were coming. She was apprehensive at first but quickly agreed saying 'it was coming sooner or later'.

The next few moments returned to silence. 'Hopefully' I thought they won't make fools of themselves and be proper gentlemen like they ought to be.'

We pulled into my driveway, and I could feel the tension around me, so thick I could cut it with a knife. I could see my dad's face at the window watching Paul, like a hawk would to its prey. I resisted an eye roll at my father's Neanderthal behavior. Paul came around and helped me out of the car since I was too small to get out myself. And then we walked hand in hand towards the front door, I smiling on the inside because I knew it pissed off my dad.

We walked through the front door and there they were my dad and Bo. Standing there arms crossed looking intimidating.

"Rachel, do you mind telling me why in all get out is that boy here?" Bo said sourly.

"Rachelle," My dad said using the nickname he came up with for me when I was a little girl. "Please go in the other room with Bo, so I and your friend here can have a little chat."

"Okay daddy." I said trying to lighten him up before I left.

Bo and I excited the room, but hastily ran to the secret hiding place behind the vent where you could here everything. The only problem was it was really cramped in there.

"Ouch! Quit pushing me." I whispered-yelled.

"Shut your mouth before we get caught." He said irritated.

I huffed in annoyance and went back to listening.

"You know that you're going out with my little girl here right." My dad started out saying.

"Yes sir I do know that." My Paul said in utmost respect.

"Then you wouldn't mind following the seven rules I came up with for my oldest when she started dating." He said,

Then pulled out the list of the most embarrassing, horrifying, annoying set of rules ever created. He didn't wait for Paul's answer, and began reading of the list.

"Rule Number One, if you pull into my driveway and honk you'd better be delivering a package, because you're sure as heck not picking anything up." Dad said in a loud voice, making sure Paul knew he meant business.

"Rule Two, You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter's body, I will remove them."

"Rule Three: I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Please don't take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. However, In order to assure that your clothes do not, in fact, come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric staple gun and fasten your trousers securely in place around your waist."

'Oh dear lord, please tell me when it will end' I prayed. Paul tired to add in a word during my father's rant but he told him that his time to talk will come.

"Rule Four," he continued on "I'm sure you've been told that in today's world, sex without utilizing a "barrier method" of some kind can kill you. Let me elaborate: when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I WILL kill you.

"Rule Five, and my personal favorite." He said in high spirits "In order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is "early."

"Rule Number Six, I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make YOU cry."

"Rule Seven, the following places are NOT appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool. Places lacking parents, policemen, or nuns. Places where there is darkness. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka zipped up to her chin. Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which feature chainsaws are okay. Hockey games are okay. Old folk's homes are better."

"And last but not least my final rule number Eight" My dad said in a proud voice, like he actually accomplished writing the Declaration of Independence.

"Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a potbellied, balding, middle-aged, dim-witted has-been. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless god of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the house. Do not trifle with me."

I literally smacked my head on the wall so much I couldv'e got brain damage.

"Are we clear on these rules, if not you could recite them to me next time you come over or not." He said in an arrogant tone.

"Yes sir, I fully understand the rules you have given me and I will abide by them." Paul said respectfully.

By the look in my father's eyes, I actually think he likes Paul! I mentally did a happy dance inside my head. Bo started grumbling to himself about how dad shouldn't have gave in so soon.

"Rachel?" My dad called out for me.

"Coming!!" I nearly shouted out.

I ran all the way down the stairs and into the living room and slide right in front of them.

"Yes daddy?" I said in a vioce I know will get him ever time.

"It's late, why don't you go walk Paul out to his truck. We have Church in the morning though so be quick." He said with a defeated look on his face.

"Thankyou daddy." I said politely, but was absolutely glowing.

I tired grabbing Paul's hand while we wakled out, but he pulled away mouthing 'Rule Two.' I rolled my eyes at his idiocy but didn't push it.

"Goodnight Rachel" He said then kissed me, while his hands caressed my face.

"I'll call you tomorrow, when I can." He said, then kissed me once more, twice, then a third. He looked back at me with pure happiness radianting off of him.

I watched him drive away thinking to myself, 'Wow, God had a fun day planning out my life.'

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xoxo--Chasity *