A/N: Hey ho, here I am with another chapter. I tried to move faster than last time, and it is a slightly shorter chapter, but still over 10,000 words. It won't contain that much action, because it's only a... preparation for the next one. But this one explains the lives of the others before Akatsuki, that's why I called it "History".
I would really need a nice feedback on this one, it's the first time I actually wrote the way I wanted to, meaning I described all the feelings and all the fear going on in detail. I just want to know if it's not boring for you, I can give it up if necessary. Other than that, this is where the story will start with the total angst. No more fun, no more childhood. Of course, i'll still put some funny comments and situations, but not that often, we're in war, ne? Okay, please read and review!
History
(Sasori POV)
"Kisame's dead-" That's all I heard before a loud thud caught my ears, and Naruto shouted 'run!' A huge explosion followed, even Deidara was staring from behind the car. It made quite the blast. I could see Naruto trying to hold Itachi from running to the now in flames bunker. Tobi was there, with Sasuke.
"Let me go! What if something happened to them? What if Sasuke was caught in the blast? I've gotta go find him!"
"You're not going anywhere," Naruto said, struggling to keep Itachi from moving. Soon, though, he couldn't anymore. Itachi overpowered him easily. I contemplated on going with him, but decided against it.
"Come back, he's fine! Itachi! I expected the explosion…" Then why did he send Sasuke away? It was obvious that the safest place from the blast was right here, where we were. He couldn't have risked Sasuke's life just to be able to talk to Itachi in private!
"Tobi… did he take him somewhere safe?" Itachi blurted out fast. He really looked enraged, with bloodshot eyes, because of fear. He tried to conceal the fear with anger. He fooled Naruto, who was now scared shitless of him, but not me.
"Of course, I told y-you, he's my friend, and I'll take care of him. I just hope they got to the place I've indicated in time. Either way, in the worst case scenario, he'd end up with only a couple scratches."
"Why didn't you tell me first thing? Where is he?"
"I didn't have time to. And he's… well, somewhere near the ruins."
"What ruins?"
"The ones near the bunker. He'll be safe there. I asked Tobi to tell him that the entrance to the bunker is under the ruins, so that he won't suspect a thing."
"WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT, UN? THAT'S SUCH A PATHETIC EXCUSE FOR AN EXPLOSION! I WOULD'VE MADE IT 5 TIMES BIGGER, UN!"
"Not again…" Naruto muttered, then looking at me. "How can you stand him?"
"I got used to it. So, Itachi…" But he wasn't there with us anymore. I could still see his running figure, the wind blowing in his hair, as he was getting farther away from us. "Is he going to be okay?" I asked Naruto.
"Why wouldn't he? There's no danger in that place. Well, no real one."
"Hey, un! A car's coming!"
"Can you see if it's Pein's or Hidan's?"
"Dunno, un. It's too dark! But I can hear talking, un!"
I stopped to stare at the approaching car, even though I could only see the lights. We all hid behind my car, waiting. The car stopped not far away from us. If they're the yakuza, we're pretty much fucked. How could we just forget to conceal our presence? I hear whispering, but couldn't make out what they were saying. Deidara started shivering already, and honestly, I would mock him if I could afford making any noise. He said to me in a low voice "I'm scared, Sasori…"
That moment, he opened his mouth to say something else, but Naruto quickly covered it with his hand. He'll have to do a lot of explaining once Deidara realizes that he knows something. The next second, I heard shouting from behind my back.
"Put me down, damn it! I can walk on my own just FINE!"
"No, you can't. That rock fell on your ankle."
"And it scratched the skin! It didn't break my bone, the ankle isn't twisted, I'm all right, okay? Put me down!"
"No."
"Why?"
"I have to take care of you. It doesn't matter what happens exactly, I'll take care of you, big baby. Right now, I'm still in shocked and scared mode, let me pamper you until I'm sure everything's fine again."
"You make me feel like a 5 year old, Itachi! Hey, why are those hiding and looking terrified at me?"
And then, Itachi saw the car. His eyes widened the slightest bit before rushing at the car where we all were. I could also see Tobi coming, a bit behind Sasuke and Itachi. Sasuke though, didn't see the car and continued talking.
"Hello, Itachi! What happened, cat caught your tongue?"
"Shut up. Be quiet." He sounded rather harsh, and Sasuke picked that up.
"Don't talk to me like that!"
"Sorry. Now keep quiet."
"And what if I don't want to?" Then, Itachi slapped him. Not that hard, but intense enough so that Sasuke would get the idea. Right now, he's in business/serious mode, and if he says 'keep quiet' and you don't… well, yes, you'll end up regretting your decision.
"I told you to stay quiet. I'm not kidding, and if you don't want to die, you better listen to me. This is not child's play. This is my world, and you'll do as I say, because it's for your own good." Sasuke still looked hurt, like in 'I can't believe you're talking to me like that' hurt. He's probably never seen Itachi so straightforward before.
In truth, Itachi never acted like that towards Sasuke. It would be both inutile and it would lead to endless fights, which Itachi dreaded. But when the situation asks for it, Itachi would even slap his mother, if necessary. (If she lived…)
"Wh-what happened?" whispered Sasuke, looking at me with questioning eyes.
"A car. We don't know who it is. Until we find out, we need to hide. I've been stupid enough to park the car in such a visible place. If it weren't for the darkness, we'd be doomed." I heard him whisper a silent 'oh…'.
My phone rang. And I thanked God it was on vibrations. But, it was Leader, and I couldn't exactly speak… Itachi took the phone from my hand and hung up, and then standing and walking towards the car we were hiding from. It means it's Leader's car; Itachi is no idiot, and he's always right. I took Sasuke's hand in mine ad walked to the car as well.
"Aren't we hiding anymore? Sasori, wait…"
"That's Leader's car. Well, that's what Itachi thinks, and he's always right."
"Who's Leader?"
"Pein."
"Come here, it's Pein." That was Itachi, who was already at the car, leaning on the window.
"You should've recognized the car from the start, Itachi."
"No, you should've. It's dark, do you really expect me to see the car when I can barely see Sasuke or my hands?"
"I'm sorry, it's just that… tonight we're too distraught, really."
"I'm not. Only you are. Pay attention or you'll kill us all. I can't take care of everybody. Pein also has to pay attention to Sakura, so that only leaves you and me."
"Sakura? What is she doing here?" asked Sasuke with a hint of concern in his voice.
"Helping us, obviously. She's the only medic we have. We need her."
"But, Itachi… What if something happens to her?"
"It's gonna be your job and Naruto's to keep her safe. Now, I have to go talk to Pein. You stick with Naruto, deal?"
"Fine." But he didn't go to Naruto, he came to me. He started asking all sorts of questions, like 'What do you do in Akatsuki?' and 'Is Itachi really that important to the organization?'
"Well, in Akatsuki, my job is pretty much the same as Itachi's. We fight, we are weaponry masters. Also, we're infiltration agents. Sometimes, even the bait. We have all sorts of attributions, it depends on the situation. And Itachi, well… he is the most important member and he fights heavenly, although most of the times, Kisame was the one doing the fighting while Itachi extracted information. We almost never let Itachi do the torture, or anything violent."
"But why? You said he's good at this kind of stuff."
"He is, but…he's too extreme. His torture is on a whole other lever than Hidan's, for example. He kills anyone he has to interrogate, even though he gets the information he wants. Itachi tortures people on two levels: physically, but also psychologically. You don't know how much of a genius he is when it comes to this… It's almost like he's psychic or something. I was once in the same room, when he did the interrogation. He didn't bother to beat the guy up, only enough so that he could see blood. But as he was asking, I could see the distress on that guy's face. All Itachi was asking were personal things, and he said them in a terribly confusing manner for me…"
"I always knew he's a very… complex person, but he never enjoyed thinking too much when he was around me."
"Maybe he didn't find the need to think all that much. Once Itachi begins to actually think a situation over, prepare to have at least 5 ways it could turn out, and also 5 plans for every single eventuality. If Itachi's mind was a labyrinth, I swear I would never be able to get out. And back to what I was saying, Itachi doesn't need someone to voice his answer for him to know what that person wants to say. He reads faces and hearts immediately. And he does this naturally. He often has trouble controlling himself when friends lie to him, because he instantly knows. It's not a nice skill to have, if you ask me, although it comes in handy at times"
"But what about the fights? Why does Kisame fight if Itachi is better?"
"Blood. When Itachi sees blood, something happens to him. It's like he's a vampire, all his feelings start and end with blood. When he sees blood, he can feel from terror to insane anger. We have a problem with the latter. When he fights against the yakuza, he strongly believes that those bastards deserve to die, and somehow wishes to bathe in their blood. You know fairly well that Itachi's a sadist anyway. This is just a bonus. Why do you think he almost never refuses to cut slash torture Hidan? He also enjoys it. Whatever… The idea was that when he's fighting, there is no stopping him. And he is too drastic."
"He has no right to decide whether somebody lives or dies! It's not his choice, he's no God!" he shouted back at me. How naïve he was… Itachi is as close to a God as you can get between humans. He decides what you feel only by looking at you (whether it is a glare, an alluring look or pure rage). But, then again, it's not like he would ever do that around Sasuke…
"That's what I also told him, and that's why he doesn't fight anymore. He decided I'm right, but they still deserve a coma."
"I thought he was a peaceful person…"
"He's just thinking of how many lives the yakuza took, and the rage is what's making him do this. Behind all that emotionless façade, he has his own intense feelings. He was never one to show his emotions, I doubt he would be able to even if he tried. But he doesn't even like to fight all that much. He only wants a better world, or something like that. He has his own selfish motive, though. I joined him because I believed in what he was saying. And Pein also respects him, and his goal. Maybe we'll never succeed, but as long as we manage to destroy the yakuza little by little, it's fine with me."
"When will this end?"
"When we'll grow old or die in mission. Once you're in, there's no way out. Especially Itachi, he will never give up. This is his life. He told me once that his life would never be the same without Akatsuki. He's addicted to danger."
"But I don't like to know him doing this! He could die in the blink of an eye! Doesn't he think about me? I'm more or less helpless without him protecting me!"
"Trust me, he's doing all this because of you. I told you there's a reason behind all this. It's just that you might never find out. Even I only know half the truth."
"Tell me! Please, Sasori! I really want to understand what's going on around here, and you're the only one around here who seems to have an idea!"
"I can't tell you all I know, Sasuke. I'm sorry. But I'll warn you: stay as far away as you can from the yakuza. You'll inevitably have to face them, as much as Itachi tries to avoid this. Don't listen to a word they say, and just… don't go anywhere near them, or you'll end up dead."
"I already knew that, Sasori. It's painfully obvious that those guys are deadly, duh."
"You don't understand… Look, their leader wants something from Itachi. In other words, he wants you. I can't tell you why, since Itachi never told me. It's just that, this time, we are trying to protect you from them with all we have, because you can't fend yourself. Do you get it?"
"Yes and no… Why does the yakuza want me? Do they even know who I am? I've got absolutely no importance in this whole act. I don't even know who they are."
"Neither do we. Only Itachi knows their identities. He told us that names are not important. Well, the point is that you have to take very good care of yourself. Itachi can't protect you all the time, as much as he tries."
"Okay, I get it. Looks like my childhood's over, huh? I wish I had a normal life."
"If you had a 'normal' life, you wouldn't be with Itachi, as lovers."
"True. I don't know what I want myself, really. I feel little, in this big world of yours… I've been raised as a normal teenager, I had friends all the time, and I went out to parties, even though I always stayed in a corner, I finished high school. And suddenly, I find myself being thrown in all this mess, where people die and everybody seems to expect it, and you always have to fear for your life. It's like going to sleep uncertain that you'll ever wake up. It's confusing, and it's making my head spin. I don't know how you and Itachi and… all of Akatsuki can live like this. The stress is almost too much for me!"
"You're still only 17. Just because Itachi was able to resist the pressure, it doesn't mean you'll take it just as well as he did. Nobody condemns you. We're not normal people, even if we seem to be. Yes, we do get drunk sometimes and do shit, but we're 'made' for this life. Even guys like Deidara or Hidan, who look so carefree, have a great potential."
"How so?"
"Deidara, who started by blowing up trashcans, is now a bomb specialist. Hidan, who's a total masochist, became a great Intel extractor. If you want information, he'll get it for you, no matter what. He'll laugh in front of death and complete the mission, even if it's the last thing he's doing. Kakuzu, a totally greedy person, obtains information with bribery. He works with money all the time. And even when he has to pay from his own pocket, if the mission is important, he will do it. Kisame… He was probably the most faithful person. He always kept us away from danger, and he refused to sell us out. He was a great guy, and we all care for him…"
"You seem to be friends with all the people in Akatsuki. It's great to trust the ones you're working with. I can't help feeling that you're all a big family, all friends. Both on missions and in private life. It's something I wish I had, Sasori. Friends that I would give my life for, friends that I can call my own. You're forever going to be Itachi's childhood best friend. Hidan and Kakuzu as well. Pein and Konan are grateful to him for introducing them. Those are real life friends… Itachi is lucky to have you all."
"You have your own friends, Sasuke. Naruto and Sakura, have you forgotten about them? They're ready to help you whenever you need it. Cherish what you already have. And you're talking so much about Itachi… You have Itachi! He's probably the best example of a person who'd give his life away for you without ever considering not doing so. You have more than you think you have, Sasuke."
"But you guys share interests! I mean, from what I've heard, Itachi along with you and Pein created Akatsuki! Also, Itachi was the one to bring new members around! This means he gave all of his friends the opportunity to be standing by his side. Akatsuki is a friendship-based organization, am I right?"
"Yes, it's true. Akatsuki consists of Itachi's friends, mostly. That's why we have such a big success rate. Being all friends, we look after each other. It's something special."
"And I thought Itachi was a solitary man. Seems like I was wrong. There are so many things that I don't know about him."
"And you actually assume that the others know him like the backs of their pockets? Only Hidan and me know him better. The others only know as much as he allows them to see. Don't jump to conclusions."
"At least he spends a lot of time with you! He doesn't really give me all that much attention. I'm like a luggage he's carrying around. Ever since he came back from Somerset, he's not the same. Even after that night when… you know… He still wasn't the same. He's cold, and too focused on his mission and the yakuza. He doesn't even pay much attention to me! I know he cares, I really do, but… sometimes, I just wish our life would be less complicated, less dangerous."
"He's focused because he wants to do everything right. He wants to get everyone alive out of this situation. He's tired, believe me. All this stress is tiring him out. That's why he can't find any more energy to deal with you as well. Even before Somerset, he was tired. But then, he had that problem with the internal bleeding. Only two weeks after that incident, you decided that you wanted something more from him. He only gave himself one week to decide what he was going to do. He had one night of, let's say relaxation, but 3 days later, we have to leave. Which leads to the current day. We are in Connecticut. Itachi's old disease is back. He's totally worn out, but he continues to worry over you and do as much as he can by himself. He can crack any moment now. He'd never say it to your face, but he doesn't afford spending time with you."
"Then, why the heck am I here?"
"Are you stupid? Because the yakuza wants to roast your ass and you're safer with us than home alone, you genius."
"I understand the fact that he's busy, but I still want a part of his time. Just a little bit, as much as I hate to have to share him."
"Oh, you hate to share Itachi with us? Then, tell me more about the way you wish to die. Get reasonable, Sasuke. He's not yours. All of our lives depend on him. And he's even trying to please both parts. Just how much more do you want from him?"
He started looking around, not answering my question. This was like a cold shower for him, I bet. Even so, he must understand the situation we're in. Itachi would never tell him how tiring his life is. He just wouldn't. Itachi knows, better than anyone, how it feels when people tell you that you're in the way. His own mother used to do that, while his father dumped all his work on him. Not even as a child, Itachi didn't have an easy life.
When he was barely 8, he used to come and complain to Hidan and me about all the chores his father made him do. I always offered to help him, but not once did he let me work in his place. And with all the stress his parents were putting him under, he regretted their deaths deeply. Especially his mother's. Even now, he's still dreaming of his father sometimes. Sasuke wasn't affected as much as Itachi, but he still felt guilty. All this time, and he continues to believe it's been his fault that his parents died in that car crash.
As far as I am concerned, the car crush was just plain odd. It almost seemed impossible. Itachi never commented on it as much as I would've liked. He was only 15 back then, and he wasn't even home when it happened. Sasuke was home alone and he called his parents to tell them to move faster, because he didn't like being alone for too long. When Itachi returned home, 2 days after, he already knew about his parent's deaths. He didn't talk to me much, he only told me to take care of Sasuke.
He spent all his time with Hidan. He was a bit depressed at that time, and I found out from Sasuke that he's been cutting. At first, I couldn't believe it, but it was a reality. He even ended up in hospital. Hidan, being the only one who was 16 then, used to drive Sasuke and me back and forth to the hospital all the time. Itachi only stayed in there for 3 days, and he was released.
After that incident, Itachi got back to normal. All the papers they had to sign exhausted him, also because of all the psychologists that wanted to make sure he wasn't crazy. He wasn't. He told me that, but I still don't know what determined him to do what he did. But Itachi had that flicker in his eyes that told me he knew more than he let see. And his reason for cutting was not late mourning, or maybe not only that…
The foster home was their uncle's, and Itachi had a hard time there as well. Him and Sasuke lived with their mother's brother. Well, to be precise, one of their mother's brothers. Their family was a very extended one once, especially from the mother's part. Mikoto had 2 brothers. They ended up staying with the younger of them, Izuna. Izuna, who was barely able to take care of himself, let alone two children.
Again, Itachi was left to take care by himself of Sasuke and Izuna. From the moment I've seen Izuna, I've liked the guy. He was 25 then. He was what you would call a big baby. He used to ask Itachi to play cards with him all day, and asked Sasuke to cook. When the food turned out to be burnt or plain horrible, Izuna just sulked, and did nothing to provide any food at all. Funny, it was I ordering for pizza or other food in general, for them. Even if it seemed all-simple, it didn't last long. Only 3 years.
I've also met the second brother. And he was scaring me to no end. He wasn't funny, but sarcastic. And when he was angry, I literally wanted to dig a hole in the ground and hide. His name was Madara. He was especially close to Itachi and Izuna. Luckily, I wasn't on his black list, but I was still scared to be around him at times.
He didn't like Sasuke, for some reason. He always told Itachi to stop babying Sasuke, or he'll turn out as a second Izuna. And that's exactly what happened. Every time Madara was shouting at Sasuke, Itachi started to argue with him, like 'Leave him alone and go fight with your own brother instead, he's always more than willing!' As an outsider, it was quite funny to hear those arguments and be able to understand their points. Izuna and Madara fought all the time. And they were loud. I bet the whole neighborhood heard them shouting at each other. In the end, with all the chairs used as weapons, Izuna decided he was tired, and started laughing on how stupid the reason of the fight was.
I miss those two fools. Mostly Izuna. Madara had a mixed personality that always managed to confuse me to no end. With Izuna, he was either joking or shouting, or kicking. When he was with Sasuke, he started PMS-ing. When he was with me, he was serious. He was serious when he was with Itachi as well, but at the same time, he was more like a father. A lot kinder, somehow. Although he was kind to him, Itachi always preferred not to talk about Madara, almost like he was hiding something.
When Itachi was 16, Akatsuki was formed. I still don't know how he managed to go unobserved with this. Pein was 21 then, and was proclaimed leader by Itachi. I was the second one to join. Me, Itachi and Pein were the executives. Pein talked with the police and settled a quiet and not so clean contract with them. Even the police does illegal stuff sometimes, if it helps for their cause. Illegal, because some of us were minors. But Itachi's father worked in the police forces, so we were trusted.
At first, we've only been 4. Me, Itachi, Pein and Hidan. After 3 months, Itachi brought Kisame, who was older than all of us; he was 23 back then. When Itachi turned 17, he brought Kakuzu, as an old friend that he trusts. Pairs were already formed. Hidan has been paired with Kakuzu, Itachi with Kisame, and I with Pein.
1 year later, Itachi found Konan in a brothel. She was there against her will, but was too afraid to run away. The second Itachi got into the room, she liked him. After one month of trying to lure him in with no success, she told him she wanted to escape that place. Itachi accepted to get her out of there, and offered her to join Akatsuki. She had great knowledge in the art of seduction, but she also knew how to immobilize one person. And maybe some potions nobody ever heard of, that she used to put her clients to sleep when she was not in the mood to even try to fight. Alas, she could be very useful to us, and it proved to be a good idea.
This way, Konan and Pein met, and only after 5 months, they married. This way, I worked alone. It only took 3 months, and Deidara joined as well. Again, it was Itachi the one to find him, as an explosions fanatic. Deidra was one year younger than us. He was only 17 when he joined, yet he had a courage I've always admired him for. He glued himself to me, and that was it.
Ever since last year, when Itachi and I were 19, Naruto appeared under the pseudonym 'Kyū-nine'. None of us knew who he was, not even Itachi. It was him who contacted Pein. Only two weeks after Naruto joined, Tobi appeared out of the blue. I still don't know from where he came from and how Itachi trusted him enough to let him join, but all of us accepted his presence pretty fast. He never seemed the trustworthy type to me, and not even Itachi trusted him with important matters. But he was never arrogant, and never tried to get where he didn't belong. Which again reminds me of Madara, who was the most arrogant person to walk on earth.
It must be hard for Sasuke to accept all this, so suddenly. Itachi never told him anything about Akatsuki. Also, apart from me, Deidara, Hidan and Kakuzu, he didn't even know the members. Sasuke has finally become curious about some things. Why is he wanted by the yakuza? Why does Itachi pull all the strings here, and not Pein, the official leader? Why are we all friends? There are many things Itachi wants Sasuke to never find out, one of them being yakuza's obsession with him.
When it comes to this subject, Itachi doesn't trust anyone. Not me, not Hidan, not Sasuke. This seems to be the only secret that belongs to him. It's his to protect and avenge… There are so many things I wish I could ask him myself, but I know he'll never answer me. In the past months, I've revived my friendship with him, and we're close again. I do realize he's never lost faith in me, during those years.
So much time has passed since we've had the occasion to talk like good old friends, rediscover each other and so… Although, I can see that Itachi hasn't changed that much over the years. He's almost identical. His IQ's much higher and he's a lot more mature, but his heart will never change. And I'm able to realize things that maybe nobody can about him. Itachi is the perfect combination between a child and an old, wise man.
When it comes to taking decisions, he always considers every single possibility, analyzing the pros and cons to every strategy. He's a chess master, in all the means of the word. He's not one to drown in self-pity or anything close. He always trusts himself more than anyone else, even thought he says he's doing everything for his friends. He's one for 'If you want something done properly, you've gotta do it yourself'.
He chooses the orders and he's the one to execute them. When things go wrong, he never mopes, complains or anything, because he knows it's his own fault if something wrong happened. In the end, though, he seems to pull an Ace out of his sleeve, making everyone think that he planned everything from the start. Wait, maybe even before it started!
And he accepts to go through almost unimaginable things in order to get the mission done. It's not self-sacrifice, even if it seems to be. No, Itachi is not one to sacrifice himself just for the heck of it. It's just his conscience pushing him to do all these things, from pure devotion to his mentality, for the world he created. A word built in lies and half-truths, but a balanced world nonetheless. Just like him…
Itachi is never going to be a man of extremes. Never too excited, never too depressed, never too in love. It wouldn't be Itachi otherwise. Give him tragedies, and he'll always say it could be worse; give him a fortune, "It could disappear right in front of my eyes. Besides, you know what money makes out of the man." And, give him love… "Love is fleeting and it leaves deep scars…"
No wonder Sasuke can't adapt to this. Sasuke wants action, but not danger. Sasuke wants that passion and all the empty promises that Itachi dreads to make. Itachi is not like Sasuke anymore. He's got problems, people depending on him, he knows how hard life is, and he's had too much of reality to be able to surround himself with petty illusions of what it could be like if not for this or that.
Sasuke never liked to share anything, with anyone. His mind doesn't comprehend life yet. In all his badass-ness, Sasuke is untainted. He can't understand what Itachi is telling him, even though he is trying. For a moment, he can act like he understands, but he will never be able to hold that act up for too long. He cannot see the real danger everyone is aware of, because Itachi is shielding him from that. Itachi has decided that Sasuke's safety is far more important than understanding.
For an instance, Itachi's been misunderstood for most of his life. He's used to it. It still hurts him, but he decides to bear with it rather than seeing Sasuke leave him just because it's all too much. If there is any exception to Itachi's 'rules', that one is Sasuke. He would kill for Sasuke, he would suffer for Sasuke, and he would die for Sasuke. Both because of their 'special' relationship, but mainly because they're brothers. Itachi always loved his family, despite the fact that he was regarded more like a prodigy rather than a son. He felt guilty for not being able to protect his family, and thus he now wants to protect Sasuke, whatever it takes.
Right now, as he's talking to Pein, Sasuke's trying to distract him, to get his attention. Sasuke has been seeking attention his whole life. He's almost narcissist, when it comes to it. He thinks he's more important than anything else, and deserves all the attention he can get. When he's suffering, the whole world has to suffer with him; when he's happy, he wants everyone to share his joy. Itachi never realized this about Sasuke, because he naturally shares his brother's mood, like they were twins.
The night Sasuke was waiting for Itachi to return, he's gotten a taste of what life really is. He learnt that not everything works the way he wants it to. He understood that Itachi was the one pulling the strings, not him. Subconsciously, he has tried to bind Itachi to him, from the very moment they entered the house. He managed. For Itachi, not the tie itself is important, but its existence. Sasuke will never be able to restrain Itachi from doing what he wants. He just can't… Sometimes, even I can't. Only one person was able to tell Itachi what to do…
"Hey, Sasori! Itachi says he wants to talk to you, together with Pein!"
"Okay, Sasuke. Thanks." I looked at him again. His face was simply bored, his hair gaining once again a blue shade in the moonlight. Totally oblivious to what's going on around him. He doesn't even care enough to ask. Maybe that's what Itachi likes about him. Maybe, for once in his life, Itachi wants something that has nothing to do with Akatsuki. Someone to let him forget who he really is and allow him to be what he wants to be, allow him a moment of peace.
Now that I'm getting closer to the car, I can see Sasuke talking (arguing) with Naruto, just one meter away from Itachi, Pein and Konan. Deidara is also near them, with Tobi. Poor Dei, he looks bored to death. He's probably still disappointed with the explosion at our said hideout. When Deidara has nothing to do, he gets easily bored, unlike me.
Sasuke was constantly trying to get Naruto away from the trio, but he wasn't succeeding. Of course Naruto would want to know what's going on. His life is on the line just as well, and unlike Sasuke, he wants to know exactly what we're going to do next. Well, he must be fed up with being excluded from the 'group'. He's been our spy for quite some time, yet he never really got anything out of this, because we couldn't contact him. It was his own fault. He stayed 6 months in Japan, only to spy on the yakuza. He was risking his life to do this. And he is only 17; it's a surprise how young he is, considering how skilled he is in not being spotted.
"Sasori, do you have any ideas on what we should do?" Pein started the second I got near them.
"We leave this place, that's for sure. I wonder why we haven't already, actually."
"For 2 reasons: first, we have no real need to rush. Sakura told us that they always retreat after 'planting' one of those bombs. And second, Hidan and Kakuzu are yet to be here, so we have to wait for them." Sakura? I almost forgot she was with us…
"Well, in that case, Itachi, I think we should go to Philadelphia. We have to talk. Alone. Just the four of us: Me, Leader, you and Konan. It's important."
"And how do you suggest we do with the others?"
"Let Sasuke drive my car, together with Sakura and Naruto. Hidan and Kakuzu are fine as they are, and Deidara will go with Tobi. This way, we have Leader's car for ourselves."
"I'd rather let Naruto drive your car." Itachi stopped me. "I really don't trust Sasuke with driving at night, especially because every single time he's driven a car, he has more or less drunk."
"Whatever works. The important thing is that the 4 of us are in the same car. We have important matters to discuss."
(Sasuke POV)
"Let them talk alone, dobe! If you hear anything, I'm sure as hell you'll tell the yakuza without ever realizing it!"
"Oh, but Sasukee, I want to know where we're going on vacation next! Oh, did you see that huge firework? I want to see another one, please!"
"That wasn't a firework, you moron, it was a… Never mind, you don't need to know. And you probably won't see another one, I believe everyone here wants to leave."
"Right! Big bro said it was dangerous, remember? I like danger!"
"Stop calling him Big bro, he's my brother, not yours! And yes, he did say it was dangerous, but you don't have to worry about it."
"If you say so, Sasukee…" This is unusual for him…he would normally argue with me for hours! But he looks tired, like in 'I've had enough adventure for a day' tired…
Maybe it was the car ride that exhausted him. He didn't even shout as he always does! Something is off with him. I know Itachi talked to him while I was away with Tobi, but I don't know what he told him exactly. I wonder if the conversation has anything to do with Naruto's sudden change in behavior. The guy has never been quiet, as much as I always try to shut him up.
"Hey, dobe…"
"Yes?" Again, a short answer, and a tired, somehow lost gaze.
"Are you okay? You're not your usual self, you're too quiet."
"Itachi told me to keep quiet, that's why." He never calls Itachi by his name! Even earlier, he called him 'Big bro' as usual. With every sentence, he's acting stranger!
"You never listen to what other people tell you, Naruto!" I could almost see the irritation in his blue eyes. Does he know more than he lets me see?
"Quit it already, Sasukee… I'm too tired to argue."
"You don't look tired, you look concerned, and uneasy. Really, what's wrong with you?"
"I said it's nothing, Sasuke! Leave it at that! I'll be okay tomorrow."
"So something actually is wrong with you!"
"Leave me-"
"Hey boys, listen here!" Sasori interrupted Naruto with a whistle. It's only been 20 minutes and they're already done talking? "We'll do some re-grouping, okay?"
"What do you mean by re-grouping?" I asked him, even though I had a fairly good idea of what he meant.
"We'll do some arrangements on who is going with whom and in which car. For example, Sasuke, I won't be in the same car as you anymore now."
"Well then, tell us the 'arrangements', I guess."
"Dear Sasuke, you'll go in my car, with Naruto and Sakura. And message from Itachi: Naruto drives. I'll be with your brother, Pein and Konan. Hidan and Kakuzu are still together, and poor Dei will be going with Tobi. Got it?"
"Why poor Dei? It sounds funny when you call him like that." Naruto chuckled.
"He gets easily bored, and it's not like he actually enjoys talking to Tobi. And sorry, but his name is too long, I had to shorten it somehow."
"Why does the dobe drive? We'll end up in the first tree, if he drives the way I think he does."
"That's what Itachi said, who am I to argue or question his motives? Oh, and take care of Sakura. She is important for our mission."
"Sure, you can count on me."
"Where are we going?" That was Naruto, who was looking at Sasori with genuine curiosity. He really is changed; and I'm starting to believe that Itachi told him about the mission. Otherwise, he would've said something at the 'Sakura is important for the mission' part. If I'm right about this, then why does he try to make me think that he doesn't know a thing? It's not like him at all… He's only had a 'serious' moment before, when we were in 12th grade, this year, and he disappeared for 2 months, after his 'weird acting' period. I hope he doesn't decide to evaporate again, this time.
"We all decided that we're leading to Philadelphia. At least it's safe. We'll go to a hotel most probably. Do you know any hotel in Philadelphia?" Oh yeah, Naruto and knowledge, those just don't mix.
"Yes, there is the 'Four Seasons', in Logan Square. It's easy to get there, once you enter the city. But the road to Philadelphia takes a lot of time, and it's already night."
"Then, we'll go there. It's only temporary, anyway. Naruto, we need to get there tonight, so I hope you can keep yourself awake for all the way there."
"Fine. If anything, Sasuke will replace me. Where is Sakura, then?"
"Right away. Here are the car keys, take care not to wreck my car. Oh, wait… Sasuke, can you excuse us for a second?"
He pulled Naruto after him, and I couldn't hear what they were saying. I decided to go to Itachi and ask him where Sakura was, so we could get going faster. Itachi wasn't very far away from me, but before I could get close, Naruto rushed to him and started talking and gesticulating a lot. Itachi was listening, and only sporadically saying something.
Even if I was too far away to hear what they were talking (more like whispering), I could see Itachi's pained face. It was like he was given some awful news. Sasori was only looking at them from behind, with the same burial face. What happened?
"How are you, duck butt? I haven't seen you in a long time."
"Not long enough… It's barely one month. Things happened very fast, actually. I feel like my whole life is on fast forward."
"I'm used to it, what can I say… It's nothing new or exciting. Only more dangerous, if anything. I'm surprised about you, though. I thought you'd have a warrior spirit within you."
"I don't know, Sakura. I just have to get a hang of everything that's happening around me, and I'll be alright."
She smiled at me. Sakura always managed to make me feel confident. I don't think I mind all the pressure, if I come to think about it. Itachi's doing an excellent job at keeping me out of this whole… thing. I miss him, though. I thought he would accord me some more time after… 2 days ago? Almost 3. Geez, so many things happened in such a short time. It's 11 PM. I'd normally be sleeping by now, or spending more quality time with Itachi, that would normally lead to sex if not for Itachi's stubbornness and new-found passion for always hugging me from behind. Ugh…
But right now, Itachi's not here with me. He's not trying to tell me not to worry, and he knows I don't like this situation and our positions. Mostly mine. He can survive no matter what form what Sasori said, but ME? I only know how to use that knife from our father. But against some bloodthirsty, professional-swordsmen yakuza members, I'm a sure victim, and I can't do anything about it.
Even Naruto talks to him more than I do. Sakura is also involved into this… I can't help but feel that even though Itachi has all the Akatsuki as friends, he wants to steal mines also… First it was Sasori, now it's Sakura, and even Naruto! I know he has a right (and even reason) to do so, but I feel like I don't have any friends of my own left. Nobody to complain to, nobody to be there exclusively for me. It looks like I can say goodbye to my normal life and be here, in this world where I don't belong, in order to support Itachi and try not to get killed. I know he wants to protect me, and that he does care, and maybe if I give it enough time, he'll return to being my older brother once again.
"Sasuke, what's Naruto doing here, by the way?"
"Itachi brought him to be my guardian or something of that sort. Why?"
"He seems to be very familiar with everyone here."
"Well, he met all of them at Sasori's place, earlier today. Tobi was the only one who he didn't know."
"But, he came with Tobi."
"No, he didn't. He came with Pein… wait…"
"I came with Pein. Pein and Konan came at the cottage in Somerset, and I switched places with Naruto. He came here with Tobi."
"Why? So he was here before us? Why did you two have to switch places?"
"Tobi said something about a mission he had, but I can't figure out how Naruto fits into that picture. I thought you knew some more about it."
"I don't. Itachi doesn't tell me anything at all. I didn't even know we're leaving until 6, when Sasori called me and ordered me to pack, because we're leaving to Connecticut."
"Same happened to us. Only it was Konan who has called and told us to pack and be ready to leave. It all happened suddenly. Tobi said it was because of some old member of Akatsuki who appeared out of the blue from Japan and gave us new information that determined the grand departure. Hey, look! Another car!"
"Must be Hidan with Kakuzu. Another member? And where is he, then? I thought the whole Akatsuki gathered here. And Kisame's not here… where is he?"
"You didn't hear? Kisame is dead. Well, more like he was killed by the yakuza. Naruto was the one to break the news. He said he discovered the body, alongside with Tobi. It must've been tough for a guy like Naruto…"
"That's why he was acting weird earlier! Kisame… why did it happen like that? How did Itachi react?"
"I only saw his face, and he looked rather upset, but at the same time… I don't know exactly, his face was sad, but his eyes showed that he was expecting it to happen. Pein didn't even react at it, he didn't seem to care, or if he did, he is one hell of an actor. But everyone there seemed to have expected it."
"Itachi was expecting it? What do you mean he was expecting it? If he knew this was going to happen, he would've helped him! They were good friends from what I saw."
"You don't know how things work over here, duck butt. Kisame got caught, you know that, right?"
"Yes, I do. Sasori told me 2 days ago."
"Well, if he got caught, especially by the yakuza, there are 80% chances that he would talk. In other words, betray, against his will, because of the continuous torture."
"Yes, but how does that…?"
"Akatsuki could've been in great danger if they got Intel from Kisame. Itachi, but mostly Pein, could have given Tobi a mission to finish him off, or 'silence' him. Not out of hatred, but out of necessity."
"Itachi would never do that, Sakura! He cares about his friends too much to do that!"
"Sasuke, it's not about friendship here. He had to choose between your safety and the other members' and Kisame. Really know, he would always choose you over anything. Do you understand?"
"He still wouldn't do that!"
"Maybe you're right, and Tobi acted on his own. But it still sounds strange to me…"
"And Naruto saw the body?"
"That's what he said."
"But, the body would still be… at them! He would have to go inside to see it."
"That's right. So, you're saying that Naruto got into the yakuza's nest with Tobi? Our Naruto?"
"Yes, our Naruto. Our retarded, noisy and carefree Naruto. I can't believe it! No wonder he looked so tired earlier… I feel sorry for him, he didn't even know this is a mission, he thought we were going on a vacation."
"You're wrong. He knew what's going on. I can't prove it, but the look in his eyes meant that he knew more than he let see. Maybe you didn't realize it, but I did."
I was way too confused to say anything else, and Sakura was also trying to put things together. I looked into Itachi's direction and I saw him talking to Pein and Naruto. Konan held a laptop and was reading something. I wonder where's Sasori, he should've been with Naruto…
Only a couple meters away, I spotted Hidan and Kakuzu's car, where Tobi was talking to them, probably giving new instructions. Wait, Deidara's also missing! Very funny, what can I say, when both Sasori and Deidara are missing, you don't want to go searching for them…
Philadelphia… I've never been there before, I bet Itachi hasn't either. Thank God we're actually gonna stay in a hotel and not some filthy bunker or a cottage this time. Not that I would mind… If Itachi's there with me, I guess anything's okay. Although I'm very attached to the house, I'll never be more attached to anything compared to him. I've made a decision ever since that internal bleeding he had: I'll always choose him over friendships, houses or the normal life I crave. I just hope I can keep my promise.
Even if I don't want to go back and forth through Somerset, Denver and Connecticut, I know he wants me to. It would be foolish to think that he needs me. All those years he's loved me silently, and he somehow managed to 'survive'. I've only developed this sick love for him for 3 years, and I've been moping every single time he decided to ignore me. I can't believe myself; I don't even know what I want! When he ignored me, I complained. Now that he is trying to give all his best and spend his free time with me, I complain. What's wrong with me?
Anyway, I'm not Itachi; I don't have his resistance and toughness. He almost got himself killed one month ago, yet he continues going on missions and leading the action. He still takes care of me, as much as he can. Yeah, keep telling yourself that. I only want all this to be over, so we can live a normal life! As normal as it can get, anyway. Our relationship itself isn't quite normal…
I suddenly realized that Itachi was heading towards me. The simple idea of him coming to me put a smile on my face. Silly…
"Sasuke?"
"Yes?"
"I'm sorry, we have to go separate ways for a while. Sasori probably already told you where to go, right?"
"More like Naruto suggested, but yes. The 'Four Seasons', from Logan Square. You're coming as well, right? I don't want to go there if you're not!"
"I'll be coming, but later. I still have some unfinished business over here. But I think it won't take too long."
"What do you mean by business?"
"Discussions, with all sorts of people. Also, I have to talk to Pein about Philadelphia. It's not as simple as it appears to you."
"Why do you always beat around the bush, Itachi? Hiding things from me won't help, especially when I find out from other people instead!"
"You said you didn't want to have anything to do with the mission, so I didn't think you would want me to tell you about it in detail. But you wouldn't understand anything at the moment, even if I told you. Be patient. In time, you'll get answers to most of your questions."
"Will you be fine, then? Is it not dangerous if you're staying? Please, Itachi…"
"Of course it's not. Don't worry about me, little one. I'll be just fine. I'll never allow anything to happen to myself as long as you're depending on me."
"You're a big liar, brother. How can I know if you're not once again lying? You had absolutely no problem with letting yourself get beaten up half to death in Somerset. And you knew I would be broken if you ever died!"
"Come here," he pressed me to his chest in a warm and tight embrace. He was so warm and so… gentle. Even his heartbeat was gentle and soothing to my ears. I could probably listen to his heart forever… "Do you hear it, Sasuke? Can you feel my heart beating?" I nodded, and wrapped my hands around his waist. "Remember what I've told you… As long as you can feel my heart beating, you know I'm still with you. And you know I'm never going to leave you alone, in all this mess, all by yourself. How selfish would I be to do that? I swear, nothing will happen to you, Sasuke."
I looked into his eyes and saw those black irises watching me, watching my every move, genuinely afraid if anything was to happen to me. He never looked at me like that. He did look at me lovingly, brotherly, even with raw passion, but never with so much concern and doubt. He doubted himself… he doubted his capacity of being able to keep me close? Is he concerned that I would leave him, is he concerned about the fact that I could be in danger? Why was he thinking this much? I only needed him to tell me it was going to be okay, not let me see him like this! I loathe seeing him like this! If he's not strong, how the heck does he expect me to be?
Why are you so damn insecure? Stop it, for god's sake! Stop all these sentimentalisms for once! You're making me feel like crap for not understanding what you're feeling! Stop doing all that I tell you to do! Just because I said something, it didn't mean I was serious! Stop trying to please me, gosh! Unless you bring me back home, you won't have me satisfied, so stop trying! It feels horrible to know you're trying this hard!
"Sasuke, you know that, right?" huh?
"I know… I know, of course. I guess I was just scared. You could've just comforted me, you know?"
"I told you there is no danger yet. Now go, and book a room for both of us, okay?"
"Yes sir! Itachi…" He was once again looking at me with a serious face on, but his eyes were the same. Same doubt was floating in the air. Ugh! "I wanted to tell you that… I know I'm probably a pain in Akatsuki's ass right now, but… I know you want me to be safe… And I know you doubt me, and I'll try my best, really! Just, finish everything fast, okay? I trust you… I'm always gonna follow you, it's not like I have a choice…"
I saw his eyes darken in a split of a second. What did I say this time?
"Yes, you're right, I guess. You don't have a choice, right? Anyway, thank you." He bent down and kissed me on the lips. "Thank you…"
"You don't have to thank me. It's not like I'm doing you any favor. I'm just admitting that I'm dead meat if you don't take care of me. It's a reality, not a bunch of nice words. Even if I wanted to run away from you and your dangerous lifestyle, I wouldn't be able to. The fact that I love you is just a freakin' bonus..." Unfortunately.
"I know what you meant," he answered with a sad smile. "Still, thank you. I'm glad that you're with me." Cut the crap, Itachi. Just say what you want to say or leave it like that…
He just patted my shoulder and left. He went back to Pein's car. Sakura was already in Sasori's car, waiting for me and Naruto. Where should I sit? Stay in the front, with Naruto, or in the back, with Sakura? I guess I'll just ask Sakura if she doesn't mind me staying with Naruto in the front.
"Sasuke, shall we go?" Naruto asked, coming towards me.
"Yes, let's go…" Here goes nothing…
(Sasori POV)
"They left. What now, Itachi?"
"Did the others leave as well? Only the four of us can be here."
"Yes, they're all gone. Why was it necessary that we were here all alone, anyway?"
"Come with me. Pein, Konan, you stay here. If we're not back in one hour, you leave."
"Where are you going, Itachi?" Konan looked really concerned at him. Pein was impassive as usual. I'm just as curious as she is, actually.
"We're going inside, of course. I want to talk to someone."
"But Sakura said they always leave, didn't she?"
"They're still here. I can feel it. Indeed, some of them left, but the one I'm looking for is still there, hidden somewhere and waiting…" I could see rage flash in his eyes, and Kami, it was so intense! I've never seen him look so full of life. His usual emotionless poker face was long lost. His face was full of emotion, full of anticipation.
"Who are we looking for, exactly?" I asked him, in a low voice.
"Their leader. I bet he knows I'm here and he's waiting for me. Maybe he's even spying on me? Don't you agree?" He suddenly threw his pocketknife in a bush. All of us heard a gasp and a thud. I rushed there and looked behind the bush.
"Right in the chest, Itachi. He's dead, unfortunately. Why do you always have to kill them?"
"We couldn't have found out anything new from that rat. I know all I need to know. Get the knife back and let's go."
He's got again that killer aura that scares me about him… I got the knife and handed it to Itachi. It was still bloody, but he simply wiped the blood on his back jeans. Konan got back in the car and opened her laptop again. I wish I could stay with her and Pein. I didn't want to go with Itachi. Whoever this leader is, he's busted. When Itachi's eyes start flashing red, you know you're dead.
All the time while we approached the tunnel that led to their underground hideout, I decided to walk behind Itachi. I always were shorter than him, but right now, I feel minuscule. Even his walking pace seems threatening. I'm not scared; I know he'll be fine… I'm more concerned about his attitude. What if something happens to him and I can't help? Why did he have to take me with him?
"Itachi?"
"Don't ask. You'll see with your own eyes, soon enough." That must've been his signal for 'keep quiet'.
In a pretty short time, we reached the tunnel. It was dark, and we had no lanterns or matches with us. I felt him take my hand in his and lead me. I feel like such a 5 year old right now… He held my hand tight; he felt my fear, but he knew he couldn't do anything about it, except for letting me know that he'll handle the situation.
The tunnel was long, and I almost tripped when Itachi stopped. There was a door, with a lock on it. Wow, Naruto actually managed to open the lock, but closed it back when they left…
"Itachi, the lock…"
"No problem." Then, he did something that shocked me to no end. He knocked on the door.
"Are you insane?" He smirked and then pointed at the door. I didn't even notice that it was now opened, and a boy around 18-19 was standing in the doorway.
"We have been waiting for you. Come in."
A/N: That was it, my friends. I hope you enjoyed. Now... I don't know what to say.:) Geez, I'm retarded. Never mind. Just tell me how it was and review! The next chapter will be "Runaways", so... until next time!
Kisses, Ioio-Chan 3