Speed blurred the city into a smudge, bright glimmers bouncing off the rearview mirror. The seatbelt was tightly strapped so that Kida could hardly breathe. Izaya drove with one hand, the jacket trailing in the wind that swept over him. Kida felt that they were flying above the asphalt. Izaya turned corners, clipping the angle to the point he nearly got out of the road. He hummed some popular tune and was altogether breezy. The famous black motorcycle passed them but Kida almost did not notice it. Izaya swerved in between cars, took an overpass and sped into a tunnel. Lurid orange illuminated the darkness.
"Are we leaving the city?"
Kida had the disorientating feeling of being lost. He glanced at the speedometer, the needle steadily creeping beyond the speed limit.
"Masaomi-kun, are you afraid of death?"
He held the seatbelt and tried to remain calm. The world was spinning wildly.
"Everyone is, I think."
"Oh? Is that so? Let's check."
Vertigo made Kida sick with dread as Izaya turned the stirring wheel and without breaking the monotone melody burst through the opposite lane. For a split second Kida could see the liquid-like road running too close to him as the car tipped on two wheels alone and then they were dashing headlong into a flood of incoming headlamps. Kida had the vague idea that he screamed.
"Izaya- what are you doing?"
"It's an experiment."
Izaya zeroed in on a van and locked his trajectory so as to unswervingly lead to collision. He finally bothered to use both hands to drive but the song, Kida recognized it now, still lingered on. Izaya smiled with narrow hard eyes.
"You'll die!"
"Such selflessness truly touches me. He'll back off soon enough."
Kida wanted to close his eyes but somehow he could not. He now knew the blind panic that possessed some animals to stand frozen to the spot even as they were about to be mowed down. At the very last moment the van gave up blasting its horn and swung out the Ferrari. Izaya chuckled and after a few more death defying moves returned to the right lane, resuming the soundtrack without a hitch. Cold sweat dampened Kida's skin. Nausea overtook him.
"No throwing up on the seats, Masaomi-kun. I mean it."
Kida vomited over the window, the restraining belt keeping him from losing his balance and falling to a rather painful demise. Bitterness worked its way. From the rearview mirror he caught Izaya's smile. It was as smooth and full of mirth as Kida was fearful and ill. Izaya patted his head, fingers soothingly caressing hair.
"There, there. We're here."
It was with surprise that Kida realized that were in front of Izaya's apartment. He did not know when they had returned to Tokyo. Izaya parked underground and hopped out of the car, his step as light as ever. He opened the passenger's door in a mock invitation of sorts.
"Aren't you coming?"
Kida needed help to unbuckle and his legs were so wobbly that without Izaya he would have sunken. With some effort Kida managed to walk on his own. Surely there were ulterior motives to this kindness of Izaya's but whatever they were Kida could not guess. Izaya led him to the living room and Kida found himself sitting on the couch. Shortly after some hot drink was offered to him.
"Just a little something to steady you. Now, I could be mistaken but by the looks of it you haven't been getting much sleep as of late."
Kida nodded. He took a sip and the unfamiliar burn was oddly recognizable at the same time.
"There's a bit of alcohol in that. I guess you shouldn't have it, then. Since you are a minor after all."
Of course Kida could only down the rest of this liquid fire, the initial distaste replaced by comforting warmth as he kept drinking.
"Izaya-"
"You keep impressing me when I least expect it. When push comes to shove you are more concerned about my life than your own."
There was indeed a note of interest in Izaya's voice.
"Is that why you did that?"
Izaya shrugged and sat next to him.
"Who knows. Call it 'calculated risk', if you will. But this much I will tell you, Masaomi-kun. That which you cannot possibly bear to lose is what you truly do love. It's a flawless litmus test for human emotion."
Kida started. It was as if Izaya had somehow managed to eavesdrop on the previous night.