Just Like Heaven
A/N1: Here's a little something that was inspired by a recent Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductee, The Cure. The lyrics to Just Like Heaven were written by their frontman Robert Smith who says, "The song is about hyperventilating—kissing and fainting to the floor." Hmmmm…..
The lyrics were inspired by a trip with his then-girlfriend (and later wife) Mary Poole to Beachy Head in southern England. Smith said the opening line of the song refers to his childhood memories of mastering magic tricks, but added "on another [level], it's about a seduction trick, from much later in my life". Ahem… and we all know that Chuck is a Magic Man … (he's got the magic hands…..)…. But that's a song for a different day. And you should be warned that this story is suggestive – some might even say sultry – but everything is left to the imagination.
I like The Cure and loved that one of their songs was featured in Chuck vs The Ring. They missed the boat on this one though, 'cause every time I hear this song, I think of Paris – and The Train – and The Honeymooners – (which aired just over 9 years ago, btw) - and how this song could potentially fill in some of the gaps and show us some fun and reflective moments of them becoming a couple. (MmmmHmmm….. ) and fun is good. (mmmmmHMMMMMM)
I'm not making any money off this and I don't own Chuck or Just Like Heaven, but I wish I did 'cause it'd be just like a dream.
Show me, show me, show me how you do that trick
The one that makes me scream she said
The one that makes me laugh she said
Threw her arms around my neck
Show me how you do it and I'll promise you
I'll promise that I'll run away with you, I'll run away with you
April 25, 2010
An opulent Parisian hotel room overlooking the Eiffel Tower
Sarah rolled off Chuck onto the king size bed, gulping huge breaths of air to try and steady herself. Her eyes were unfocused and her heart was hammered wildly against her ribcage. Her entire body tingled, from the tips of her fingers down through her toes. She had lost herself completely in him, engulfed in a feeling of bliss unlike anything she had ever experienced.
For the first time in her life she experienced being truly loved.
Truly cherished.
Safe.
The cool, buttery soft sheets of the bed were excruciatingly comfortable, offering sharp and welcome contrast to her overheated body and sending shivers through her. Her mind still in a pleasant jumble, Sarah idly wondered what the thread count was and where she could get them for their bed at home.
Wait. What?
Get them?
Their bed?
Home?
She was thinking with possessive pronouns! She hadn't ever done that with any other man … ever.
And she wasn't freaking out.
And it was … okay.
Actually it was more than okay.
It was …. amazing.
That's because Chuck is amazing she thought.
But she always knew that. She just didn't admit it to herself.
Admitting it and not doing anything about it would be much harder, and painful and she didn't think she deserved it – him – and he certainly didn't deserve to carry all her baggage, and how could he love me, I don't love me – how can he? – and she almost waited too long, and it was almost too late ….. but it wasn't and she was not going loose this, she would do anything, go anywhere to keep it and…..
….. and she realized she was spiraling.
Taking a deep breath she focused on the most important of all those thoughts.
He loves me.
He. Loves. Me.
And God, did he do everything he could to show me.
The events of the last hour or so came flooding back into her mind, spreading warmth and shivers simultaneously throughout her body once again. Turning to Chuck, shyly she asked
"Where did you learn that – that – you know – that ….. thing…"
Turning to her with the cheekiest grin she had ever seen, his answer…
"Google"
… earned him a smack on the chest, a giggle and a smirky "Nerd" in reply.
He returned the smirk with "Well, you told me to shut up and kiss you. You just didn't specify wh - mMmhhhfff"."
He never finished. It was impossible with Sarah's on top of him, hers lips firmly attached to his.
Several minutes later, Sarah reluctantly broke the kiss but stayed close leaning her forehead against his with a deep, contented sigh.
"You know," she said "we are in Paris. And you always wanted to see the Eiffel Tower."
Chuck gave her a soft quick kiss on her lips "It's right over there. I can see it through that window. Magnificent." His kisses started to wander, making a trail to her jaw, down the nape of her neck until he reached her collarbone. That elicited a gasp followed quickly by a moan. "We … ooohh ... we should …mmmmm ….. go for a ride to the top ….. Ooo!"
"On top. I like that idea" and with surprising quickness, Chuck flipped Sarah on her back. "Let's go for that ride."
Spinning on that dizzy edge
Kissed her face and kissed her head
Dreamed of all the different ways, I had to make her glow
Sometime later found the two of them intertwined on the bed, hands softly stroking, always touching each other as if they would fly away in opposite directions if they let go. Sarah was snuggled so tight, they would have fit on a single bed and had room to spare. And Chuck was in heaven. The past few hours had been …. Amazing.
Beyond amazing he thought.
It was everything he dreamed of and more. But he always knew it would be because she – Sarah – was beyond amazing. He just never thought it – this – would happen. He didn't think he deserved it - her - and….. and …
….. and he certainly didn't deserve to be as happy as he was right now because, seriously, and
how could she be into me? Why would she want to be with me when she could have any man she wanted, even someone who looked like Superman, and when he finally told her he loved her – finally – it had lifted such a weight off his shoulders he didn't know he was carrying
But I almost waited too long. I was almost too late.
….. but it wasn't and he was not going loose this, he would do anything for her, come up with different ways to let her know, always know, always be certain that he loved her and….. and …
….. and he realized he was spiraling.
Taking a deep breath, Chuck focused everything on one thought, the most important thought.
I will make sure she knows that I love her. I will prove it every day.
Why are you so far away she said
Why won't you ever know that I'm in love with you?
That I'm in love with you?
Lying across Chuck's chest she could feel the gradual change, the tightening of his muscles, the clenching of his jaw. He was being pulled away from her by his thoughts and she had to rescue him before he was sucked down the vortex.
"You're thinking too loud."
Her words startled him back to reality "Uhhm, what?"
"I said you're thinking to loud." she mumbled into his chest, too comfortable to even consider moving. "You can hear the buzzing and clanking on the other side of the room. I'm surprised there isn't smoke coming out of your ears."
"Ok, first, you haven't moved off my chest for the last 30 - 40 minutes so you have no idea if you can hear it on the other side of the room. Second, Smoke? Really?"
Sarah lifted her head to look at him saying with a twinkle in her eye "So, you admit you were thinking for the last 30 to 40 minutes which means you were probably spiraling because you were so quiet. That and the smoke of course…"
Chuck just shook his head with a chuckle, pulling her in tighter "you're trouble" to which she nodded yes. The two fell into a comfortable silence until, after a couple of minutes, Chuck quietly asked,
"Do you remember Prague? Wait, no, of course you remember Prague and the dumbest thing I ever did except for asking that question and …" taking a deep breath "and anyway, you got us train tickets and, well,they never got used and … and .. well, I realize what a waste that was 'cause I'd really like to get on a train – with you – and just….."
"Just be" she finished
"Yeah. Just be."
After a beat, Chuck continued "I realize there are no backsies on that, no matter how much I wish there was, but honestly, I don't want to go back so" lifting his head up to look at Sarah, making sure he had her attention, that she saw how serious he was "– how about we go forward? How about we take that train ride, just you and me."
Fully turning to face her he said "Look, I meant what I told you in Castle. You were right in Prague. You and I, we're perfect for each other. And I wanna spend the rest of my life with you away from everyone else, and away from the spy life. This just seems like it would be the perfect opportunity to see what that would be like for us."
Sarah was quiet for a couple of minutes but before Chuck could go into full panic mode she looked at him with such openness it took his breath away.
"You are wrong Chuck" she answered and his heart started to sink "Not will be, not would be –it is the perfect opportunity …. and for the record … it will be amazing."
Chuck looked at her in amazement "Did, did you just say yes?"
"MmmmHmmm. I think it will be just like heaven."
**********
You, soft and only, you lost and lonely
You, strange as angels
Dancing in the deepest oceans
Twisting in the water
You're just like a dream
You're just like a dream
April 26, 2010
Train. Somewhere outside of Paris, France
Sarah was not a romantic. She did not know what it really meant to be romanced or to romance someone else. She was first and foremost pragmatic. Her life demanded it from the time she chose to run cons with her father through her career in the CIA. She trained herself to see things as they really are and deal with them sensibly.
And I almost lost Chuck in the process.
And while she didn't have first-hand experience with romance, she was well trained in seduction. Romance requires an intimate relationship and sadly, Sarah had never had one. She wasn't sure she knew how.
But Chuck made her want to try, to learn … and the notion - the romance of train travel - was not lost on her. It was something she witnessed in the old movies she would watch in run down motels while her father was off working another con. She could picture the scene. A girl runs frantically down the platform, as the conductor's whistle blows, and the doors slide shut. She misses getting aboard by a fraction of a second, throws her hands up in the air, and retires to a railing along the edge of the platform. A nearby man raises a consoling eyebrow, and they strike up a conversation.
Years later, they tell the story of how they met, due to a microsecond of fate.
Those romantic notions were crushed in Prague.
When Chuck suggested the train, she readily agreed, even though a part of her did flash back to the awful day at the station and she didn't want to spoil their time together with bitterness and resentment. The worry must have showed because Chuck noticed – Of course he did. He notices everything - and suggested they could reclaim the magic and romance that train travel represents to them by creating new memories. Good memories. Together. This would be their own personal Reconquista, their reconquering. The first of many.
Sarah realized that Chuck had helped her reclaim Paris from her awful memories right here in this hotel room. They had created some pretty awesome memories so far.
Oh God- are they awesome she sighed.
The two of them were able to secure a sleeper car. Novels and movies have long assigned romance and intrigue to railroad sleepers and they certainly fit that bill on both counts. It had become their very own private (and very compact) sanctuary for a unique and cozy bedtime experience.
A blush rose up her neck as she relived the – ahem – experience so far.
And when they actually used the bed to sleep, it was the most restful she could ever remember. The bed was like a cradle that gently rocked them back and forth into a deep blissful sleep. Having the freedom to touch each other and be in each other's arms at all times didn't hurt either.
It was just like a dream.
Riding the train brought them together physically and emotionally. Trains go where cars can and cannot: into canyons, along rivers, through mountains, sidling up to back yards and into town centers. Their conversation did the same, talking sharing and laughing together. Chuck had lots of questions. He had always tried to learn and file away little bits and pieces about Sarah. But for the first time, he had a (somewhat) willing participant in Sarah. There were still many areas she wasn't ready to discuss with him – yet - and realizing that, Chuck delved into her likes and dislikes – literature, theater, dance (she shared she wanted to be a ballerina but she was afraid she was too tall), TV – they were all explored. With each tidbit she shared, Chuck grew more excited and it was …. sexy.
Okay, to be honest, everything about him was sexy. So when they got to music, Sarah was ready to stop talking and explore her physical likes – the way only Chuck could.
Nuzzling into Chuck's neck, Sarah purred
"Do you really want to talk about music? Is that what you reeeeaalllllly want, Chuc-K?"
Chuck didn't know if it was the way she dragged out the word really to sound so sultry, making him all hot and humid, or the popping of the K in his name, but suddenly music was the last thing on his mind.
Leaning in, he nipped at Sarah's jaw, whispering "You're right. I mean, do we really have to talk at all?" He smiled as he realized his breath caused her to shiver. Moving his lips below her jaw, closer to her neck so that she could feel his breath on her skin, he started stroking it saying "There are so many …. other ….. ways …. to get … to know …. each other …. better….."
All the while, Chuck took his time, slowly moving from one side of his neck to the other, breathing slowly and seductively. He finished with a playful nibble as he finished talking, eliciting a deep moan and sending shivers throughout Sarah's body.
"Oh my God", she moaned, not for the first – or last - time that night.
Daylight licked me into shape
I must have been asleep for days
And moving lips to breathe her name
I opened up my eyes
And found myself alone, alone, alone above a raging sea
That stole the only girl I loved and drowned her deep inside of me
May 2, 2010
Chuck's (ahem…Their) Bedroom In Echo Park
Chuck lay in bed, waiting for Sarah to finish up in the bathroom and join him. She had stayed there every night since they returned to Echo Park, going to Maison 23 only to retrieve some clothing - which stayed packed in her suitcase on the floor of his closet. He wanted to ask her to move in, to make it official. But really, how much more "official" could it be then telling General Beckman that they were dating – exclusively. Chuck's smile at hearing her say those words was big, bright and full of wonder – and the smile returned every time he thought about it. It was the emotional highlight of a week that had been a swinging pendulum of emotions.
The utter relief of saving Sarah's life; the carefree and eager time of discovery in Paris; the contentment of commitment on the train – Chuck shook his head in wonder at the "vows" they had exchanged - the excitement and anticipation that come from finally coming together to have a shot at having it all; the after effects of these feelings would be felt to a long time.
Not all of Chuck's feelings were good. He still struggled with the desperation of trying to find Sarah in Paris, the panic of being unable to flash when he needed to most and the utter desolation of taking a human life. All these weighted heavily on him. He was able to push them down, but he knew he would have to learn to talk to Sarah about them.
Hhhmmphh, right – note to self – learn to talk to Sarah. he thought
With all they had learned about each other, they still hadn't figured out how to communicate – how to talk to each other about sensitive subjects. Heck it took a Basque terrorist to set them straight. His words were simple yet profound at the same time. "May I just say, I've been on the run for two years. And no matter how far you run, you can never run from yourself. And from what I've heard from both of you it's not what either of you really wants."
It wasn't.
Oh, they wanted each other, no doubt about that. They also wanted to be spies. Neither wanted to risk losing the other again. Like the husband and wife in The Gift of the Magi both were willing to give up something important for the sake of the other. Luckily Juan Diego's words were a wakeup call and the two agreed to not quit the spy life and be with each other.
More vows Chuck mused.
Chuck was snapped back to reality when Sarah said his name in a low, husky tone and walked into view – and Chuck's brain froze.
Sarah was standing at the foot of the bed wearing the lavender negligee with the see-through slip.
THE lavender negligee.
The same negligee she wore the first time she slept over. That night, that experience had been burned into his brain. The memories of that night, of the stupid things he said, of Ellie being poisoned, of Sarah dashing his hope for a relationship while under truth serum were a painful reminder that their relationship was not real …. and that it never would be. He would never see her in that ….. that … well, THAT for real.
And now, there she was wearing …. THAT …. and it was for real. All he could do was stare, his jaw slightly unhinged while his heart began to beat stronger and louder by the second. It wasn't that this was the sexiest outfit he had seen her in - Lord, some of the things she had worn on the train, wuufffff! No it wasn't the sexiest – but it was the most unattainable. Now, now it was attainable! Accessible, obtainable, getatable, handy – and boy do I want to get handy now – and hell, it was right in front of him.
"So" Sarah said, her voice still low and husky, "I see you remember this."
Chuck had to swallow thickly before answering "Ah, yeah, yeah. I, ah – I kinda – maybe – ah, yeah. Yeah I do." squirming in place as he answered. "Wh – where did – ah, where did you – you, ah you …kept ….it?"
Sarah couldn't help the giggle that escaped. He was just so adorable when he was flustered and it didn't hurt her ego that after all they had done the last few days,
"MmmmHmmm"
that just standing in front of him like this would make him so flustered.
"I kept it." she said, as she got onto the bed on all fours and started to slowly crawl her way up Chucks body "It was in the back of one of my drawers. Underneath some other clothes. Haven't worn it since that first time."
"Our first time" she purred, emphasizing the our.
Chuck shook his head in confusion, maybe a little disbelief
"But … but we didn't – didn't, ya know, we didn…"
Sarah put a finger over Chuck's lips "Didn't do anything? No Chuck, we didn't. But that doesn't mean I didn't want to. I couldn't. But I wanted to give you something, show you in some way how I felt. I guess subconsciously I wanted you to react the way you did tonight. And I kept it. For you. Only for you."
Sarah began dotting his face with kisses "I wanted … something …. to happen – and …. tonight …. I'm reclaiming it."
Stopping at his ear "Tonight … its … happening." she breathed.
"Reconquista" Chuck whispered
"Reconquista" Sarah purred
With that, Sarah sat up, straddling Chuck but never breaking eye contact.
"I had a lot of time to think about what I would do if I ever got to wear this for you again." she said with a mischievous twinkle in her eye "I came up with a lot of different ideas."
"I plan on trying them all – but they all start with the same thing…."
as she grabbed the bottom of the slip and slowly, provocatively pulled it up over her head.
"Oh my God" he moaned, not for the first – or last - time that night.
You soft and only
You lost and lonely
You just like heaven
*"Just Like Heaven" – third single released by The Cure from the album Kiss Me, Kiss Me, Kiss Me – released October 5, 1987 – Written by Robert Smith, Simon Gallup, Porl Thompson, Boris Williams, Lol Tolhurst – their eleventh top 40 hit in the UK, peaking at number 29. In the United States, "Just Like Heaven" became the Cure's first top 40 hit when in January 1988 it reached number 40 on the Billboard Hot 100 for one week.
A/N2: Whew. Anyone else think it's hot in here? I wasn't planning on doing this Cure song first – I actually have another started that was slated for the beginning of the year, but eye issues derailed the timing. I'll get to it when the timing is appropriate. Many thanks to the King of Fluff, David Carner for the inspiration from his cool story The Talk. Thanks also to Whiskeyflips for letting me reclaim Reconquista for Chuck Fanfic.
So, I do have another update to this one started and I'm kinda-almost-maybe thinking about two new (that's right, new) fics – at least one is a multi chapter that lays down a little blue eyed soul…. the other may (or may not) be a one-shot that looks at a nerd watching nerds …. so who knows….
And hey, I'd love to hear from you so leaving a note on the way out would be encouraging and much appreciated.
Till next time….