Nick sat on the cold plastic chair clutching a crappy cup of coffee in a polythene cup, he grimaced at every sip but the caffeine kick was a welcome thing. He stared incessantly at the door he had been sitting opposite for an hour and a half waiting for a Caroline and her Mom to come through it, he wasn't family so he hadn't been allowed in. He had spent the first twenty minutes after he got there straining his neck trying to hear what was going on behind the door to no avail. This is how Nick had spent most of his childhood, listening to arguments and serious conversations through closed doors and muffled voices knowing he was never going to get the full story but knowing he was going to be expected to step up nonetheless. That's exactly what he was going to have to do now, step up and support Caroline and be there for her like any boyfriend would, but the truth was he couldn't get Jess out of his mind. Everytime he closed his eyes he could see her face and remember the feel of her lips on his, the thought alone made his chest tight and his toes curl. The guilt he felt for thinking about her was crushing but she wasn't a girl that a guy could easily get out of his head, especially when he'd finally had her in his arms just a few hours ago. But the painful truth was, right now he had to let this go, let her go. He wanted to call or her or even just text her but he knew he had to talk to her face to face, he had to make her understand because if he didn't he was going to lose her for good.

Jess had given up trying to sleep, it was almost four in the morning as she sat on the window ledge slowly sipping a cup of tea. She wished she hadn't run away from him but she had no choice, she couldn't stay with Caroline there. With the blood coursing through her veins the way it had been she would have given it all away for sure so she had to leave. Her phone buzzed repeatedly but she ignored it knowing it wasn't the person she wanted it to be, she was in no mood for Adam's drunken groveling tonight, she would face him tomorrow when she had her head a little more straight. On the tenth ring she turned it off throwing it hard on to her bed and leaned her head back against the cool, hard wall. As she stared out the window reflectively she brought her hand briefly and softly to her mouth remembering how it had felt to kiss him, she had never felt that way before and it was terrifying. No matter what happened how the relationship between her and Nick had changed forever.

Jess awoke the next morning to sounds of muffled yet somewhat raised voices coming from down the hall. Schmidt had many different colours to his personality and voices to match each one of them and she could tell when he was being firm and resolute. She knew he was talking to Adam, she knew he would show up at the loft when she hadn't returned his calls. As much as she wanted to stay in bed and sleep the day away she knew she had to go and face him and she had to rescue Schmidt, it wasn't his fight.

She pulled herself out of bed trudging over to her bedroom door, one hand on the door knob and the other pressed flat against its cool surface, allowing herself a moment to prepare and collect her thoughts. As she pulled the door open Adam was more audible now she could hear him trying to reason with Schmidt who was having none of it. As she rounded the corner from the hallway she could see Schmidt standing firm with one hand on the door and the other on the door frame, his legs wide apart not giving Adam an inch. She could see Adam's worried, pleading face which was quickly drawn to hers as she came to stand behind Schmidt. She rested her hand gently on Schmidt's shoulder giving him a nod of reassurance as he relaxed his arms dropping them to his side, he threw Adam one last look of disdain before retreating to his bedroom, making sure Jess knew that's was where he was if she needed him.

As soon as Schmidt was gone Jess turned her back to Adam without saying a word and walked over to the couch leaving the front door open behind her for him to follow her like a dog with its tail between its legs. He sat down shifting uncomfortably, unsure of how close to her he was allowed to sit, as he looked at her she had her head lowered in disappointment and her palms pressed together between her knees offering him nothing. She could see him struggling to get his words out but she remained quiet and sat patiently until finally he broke the silence.

"Jess I'm so sorry, I don't know what to say I was drunk and I was an idiot and I never should have treated you like that...I just...I don't want to lose you Jess and I will do anything to make up for this, anything. Just name it and I'll do it."

"Nobody has ever spoke to me like that Adam."

"I know, I know, it was disgusting and I'm so ashamed of myself it's just, I don't know I get so jealous sometimes and I don't handle it all that well especially when I've had a couple of drinks."

"I was just talking to David, you can't flip out every time a talk to a guy."

"It wasn't David I was jealous of."

Jess swallowed hard as her face started to heat up, she was sure Adam would be able to see it written all over her face and he would figure out that she had kissed Nick. She lowered her head again and raised her hand pretending to adjust her glasses as she shielded the embarrassment on her face.

"Look Adam..."

"I know it's ridiculous, I just feel likes he gets this part of you that I don't, that maybe I never will and that scares me a little but that's my insecurity Jess and I'll deal with it. I know that you and Nick are just friends, I know that now. I just want you to forgive me Jess, please forgive me because I really want to make this work. I will apologise to Nick to I swear, I know he didn't deserve it and I'll make it right with him too."

Jess looked at the sincerity in his face and her heart ached for him a little but she knew what she had to do.

Nick was working on autopilot at the bar, he had dropped Caroline at her mother's and come straight to work and the lack of sleep was really catching up with him now, even the regulars knew to keep their distance from him today. The one luxury he had was that it was the first time he had been truly alone since yesterday morning and he had some time to breathe and think, at least that was the plan anyway but he was exhausted so his focus was a little off and his mind just kept drifting idly back to Jess. He was still finding it hard to process what had happened between them and he knew he needed to talk to her but as simple as it had all been for those few moments they had kissed, it had all become equally as complicated now. As Nick's mind wandered trying to figure out what he was going to say to Jess he knocked a row of shot glasses crashing to the floor, snapping his attention brutally back to earth. He sighed grabbing for the dust pan and brush as he knelt down on one knee to clear up the mess groaning and ranting to himself. As he rose to his feet checking he hadn't cut himself on any of the glass his eyes were drawn immediately to the bright yellow dress behind the bar which hadn't been there a couple of minute ago, and then swiftly to the bright blue eyes of the woman wearing it.

As they stared at each other the whirlwind of tension stirred back up taking them back to where they had been the night before, it took all Nick's power not to jump over the bar and pull her into his arms again. She looked so nervous he desperately wanted to go to her but he knew he had to be careful, he had to deal with all of this in the right way.

"Hi"

"Hi"

"I was wondering if I could talk to you for a second" Jess asked hushing her voice so the people around wouldn't suspect anything, not that it mattered.

"Sure, let's go..." He pointed behind the bar with both hands encouraging her to follow him as he whispered something quickly in Bob's ear on the way.

The walked back into the room where they had fallen into each other's arms hours ago and Nick was trying desperately to read her face and figure out what she was thinking, the silence was killing him so he steeled himself ready to speak when Jess beat him to the punch and began to unleash everything that had been on her mind for the past twenty four hours.

"I broke up Adam this morning and it was, not entirely, but in large part because of you, because of last night. Look Nick I don't know what it meant to you or for us but I know I've never felt that way before Nick and I would like to try and find out what it means, what's going on between us."

"Jess..."

"I'm not assuming anything Nick I just think we both need to take some time alone to figure this out."

"Jess...I can't."

He immediately edged towards her as he saw her face crumble.

"Jess it's not that I don't want to it's just I have to be with Caroline right now. Her Dad had a heart attack last night as he's in pretty bad shape and I just...I can't leave."

"Ok um ...I understand" Jess scratched the side of her head nervously as her eyes darted around the room desperately trying to avoid crying.

"No Jess please let me explain..."

"No Nick you don't have to, I get it. I do. I'm just gonna go, I shouldn't have said all that I'm sorry. Tell Caroline I'm sorry"

Before Nick could reach her once again she was out the door but this time he ran after her right to the front of the bar before she had the chance to get outside. He ran in front of her grabbing the tops of both her arms to stop her from running.

"Jess please wait I don't want to leave it like this. I don't want to lose you Jess. You have to understand that if things were different right now..."

"But they're not" Jess sniffed, trying so hard not to cry in front of him. She didn't want him to know how much this all meant to her. She just needed to get away. She wriggled gently out of his grasp and kissed him lightly on the cheek then she was gone.

Nick stood alone, watching her until she disappeared out of sight and piece by piece he could feel his heart slowly shattering.