I walked around aimlessly for maybe an hour before heading back to the farmhouse. I stepped inside and walked into the kitchen.
Andrea and Lori seemed to be in a heated conversation, probably about the knife Beth had hidden.
"That wasn't your choice to make." Andrea was saying.
"So, just let her do it? Let her commit suicide?" Lori asked.
"Let her make her own decision. If she's really sure, she'll find a way to do it anyway."
I left them fighting and walked upstairs. Beth and Maggie were sitting on the bed looking at each other.
"Hey, can I talk to Beth?" Maggie looked at me.
"Watch her." She told me before she left. I shut the door behind her.
I sat down next to Beth and said, "If you want to slit your wrists, cut along your arm, not across it."
Beth stared at me.
"Ooh, or maybe I could go grab one of those guns and you can just shoot yourself." I laid back on the bed, thinking of all the ways a person could kill themselves. "But, that's not ideal because it's loud and disgusting. I mean, your dad and Maggie and Patricia and Jimmy are gonna have to scrape your brains off the there's hanging yourself, but that takes forever. Maybe your best bet is to slit your wrists. It's almost painless and feels like falling asleep. Then again, shooting yourself is quicker, if you have the nerve."
Beth's eyes were wide and her mouth was slightly open.
"Look." I said. I sat up and took her hands in mine. "A couple of years ago my little brother Jackson drowned in a lake. He was eight. He'd be ten now. I thought I wanted to die, and I almost did." I released her hands and showed her my arms. There were two thick, diagonal scars, one on each arm. "My brother Tyler found me and took me to the hospital. They managed to stitch me up and they had to give me a couple of transfusions. If Tyler had found me just one minute later, I would have died. I have never wanted to live more than after that incident. I just don't want you to make a mistake that may haunt you for the rest of your life, or take away your chances at a 'rest of your life'."
Beth reached out and wrapped her arms around me. I hugged her back and we just sat like that for a few minutes. I released her first and told her I was going to get Maggie. Maggie went upstairs and didn't come down for a few hours. I sat in the kitchen and listened to Lori and Andrea bicker. One thing I learned while eavesdropping was that Lori was pregnant.
"Why can't you just let me win?" Carl asked.
"Because that's not how life works." I replied. Carl and I were sitting on the porch and I was teaching him how to play the card game Egyptian Rat.
"But I'm just a kid." He protested.
"Well I was just a kid when I learned how to play this game. My dad taught me and he never let me win. Not once."
"Your dad sounds mean."
"He was actually the nicest person I've ever known. With every loss, the fiery, burning need to crush him into the ground grew until I finally won."
We threw down a few more cards and I won again. Carl huffed air out of his nose.
"If we ever leave, we need to take these cards with us so I can show my brother how to play." Carl said.
"So you know you're mom's gonna have a baby?" I asked. I split deck in half and we started up another game. "And you hope it's going to be a boy?"
"Yeah."
"Have your parents ever told you how babies are made?"
"No. Mom said I had to wait until dad got home and that he'd tell me." A few minutes passed and I won again. Carl groaned.
"We aren't stopping until I win." Carl stated. I laughed. "How are babies made, anyway? Do you know?"
"Why don't you just wait until Rick gets back?" I asked slowly.
"Because. He might not come back." Carl replied. I won again.
"He's going to come back." I looked Carl in eyes. "I know for a fact that nothing is going to keep that man from coming back to you and Lori and that baby."
We sat in silence for a little while longer. Carl was focusing all his energy on trying to win. I won all three of those games, but he was getting better.
"So, are you gonna tell me how babies are made?"
"Uh... well... nope." I laughed. "Your dad's going to come back and he's going to explain to you how their made."
"Oh c'mon! Is it really that bad?"
"You are a persistent little brat." I spat, still laughing. "No, it's not really that bad, but it's not my place. Now, if you want, we can keep playing and you can keep getting your ass kicked." He glared at me and I glared back and for the next hour we were locked in an epic battle.
Finally, Carl won. He jumped up and started cheering. Just then, a the green car came up the driveway. Carl stopped jumping and we watch the car park pull up and park. Rick and Shane stepped out and headed straight for the trunk. They opened the door and pulled a blindfolded Randall out and lead him to the barn.
What went wrong? Why did they bring Randall back? This was not good.
Author's Note: I'm sorry if Mel's naming all those methods of suicide touched a nerve about Beth or if Mel's talking about her brother was a little much but I wanted a different method of stopping Beth from killing herself and to help strengthen Beth's friendship with Mel. I'm a little iffy about this chapter, I feel like it's kind of dark, so I tried to brighten it there at the end.