My sweethearts! I missed you sooo much, you have no clue! I would like to say, however, that I was partially motivated to update because I know I failed my Pre-Calc test as well as my Latin so...yeah, my life sucks. Oh well. The second reason is, although this chapter has NOT been edited yet, its just been way too long! This is the longest I have ever gone without updating and I feel horrible. _ I actually went through withdrawl and had to go back and re-read reviews and my a/n *tears* it was so pathetic! So, since I cant wait any longer, I tought I'd just give it to you unedited and re-upload it all shiney and new at a later date. Please excuse any errors for now. I'm really sorry for the delay. If it makes you feel better, I spent about two weeks obsessing over the plot and rewriting one chapter THREE TIMES. It wore on my nerves. I'm actually not even done writing that chapter yet...shame. Anyway, I'm rabbling and there is a story you guys want to read (idk if you've even read all of this 0_0 lol) so here is chapter#...(I cant remeber the number)...blah blah of Lock and Key:
~~Meet and Greet~~
Although Gin and I had been trying to keep afloat in lover's paradise since he told me about his past, as April rolled around things were beginning to feel very strained and he had become increasingly…edgy.
"Hime, I need yah ta promise me yah wont leave the house fer a while," Gin told me one afternoon as we sat on the living room couch, me between his legs as he ran his fingers through my hair.
"Psh," I snorted "Like you'd let me out of your sight long enough to go anywhere. The most I could do is take a walk in the backyard. How perilous."
"I'm serious, not even that. No goin outside period. Don't answer the door, any phone calls, take out the garbage, nothin. Got it?"
The way he said it made me freeze and crane my neck to look at his face over my shoulder "Why? What's wrong?"
"Nothin yah need ta worry yer pretty lil head about. Just…don't go anywhere."
"…Gin," I said in a low voice. "This is about Aizen, isn't it? What's going on? Did he call again?"
"What part o' 'don't worry about it' don't yah understand Hime? Just do yer part and do not go outside o' or even show yer face fer the next couple days."
"I thought we were past all this mysteriousness. I already know about it so why not just tell me what's going on…unless there's something else you're keeping from me."
Gin pulled me back closer to him, voice snapping harshly over my head. " Yah don't need ta know anymore than yah already do. Now shut up with all the questions and do as I say."
The old flame of resistance in me flared up and I pulled away, turning to huff at him in annoyance. "And if I don't? Who knows, I might just want to take a walk. If there's nothing to hide and nothings wrong, a walk in my own backyard cant hurt, right?"
"Toshiro if you disobey me and leave this house" he hissed menacingly " make sure you know you got somewhere to go cause the door will be locked if you try and come back. Or I could call your parents saying you desperately miss them and send you on a little flight, do you understand me?"
Knowing he wasn't joking, I simply lowered my head and glowered at his chest "Yes sir," I mocked, quickly hoping off his lap and walking away without another sideways glance. See? Edgy.
Since Gin's unbending will when he made a decision wasn't knew to me, the way the conversation had turned wasn't surprising. I wasn't mad because he was being as incorrigible as ever but because he was being too paranoid. Which proved my theory that he indeed was hiding something from me and made me think it was Aizen he had meet in the city that day I went to the mall and that he was much more deeply connected to the man and woman following us in the museum than I had assumed. All very disturbing conclusions.
The conversation had happened just yesterday and my annoyance had effectively put ripples in our tentative truce. If he entered a room, I left. When he tried to kiss me, I turned away or put little to no effort into it. If he grabbed my hair or pulled my arm too hard I just looked at him with dead eyes. The classic silent treatment. I knew it was childish of me to behave like this but I couldn't help it. Things needed to change between us and if I didn't push for it, nothing would ever happen. Part of me knew no matter how many years passed, Gin would still feel that he had the right to control me, which I had gotten used to. I could deal with an overbearing boyfriend; however it was the hitting and well plotted lies that I didn't want. Ever since I had that minor breakdown when we had sex after Momo was here, Gin had been extra careful with me. Gentle touches, soft kisses, the constant murmurs of 'I love you' - which wasn't new but I knew it was a contentious effort -plus the increasingly gentle sex had thrown me for a loop until I realized what he was doing. As much as Gin liked to deal out punishments, it was obvious that at some point I would need some tender loving care. Thus, it had been nearly a whole month since I was last hit and with the decrease in bruises, I couldn't be happier. But there was one problem: I knew it wouldn't last. Just like I needed love, Gin needed to hurt me. It wasn't always physical but a little mind fuckery and rough sex could do the trick too. Even that wasn't so bad. It was when the whips and belts came out that I absolutely lost it. Everything had been piling up too quickly at once with me trying to escape, my punishment, the basement, Gin's lies and Momo…my life was spinning out of control and I didn't know how to stop it. Worse yet, I didn't think this was the end but the beginning of a long line of problems to come.
So, I was silently waiting, counting the days until the dark Gin came back - the one who made me cry and wish I had never been born- and trying to mentally prepare myself for the intense rush of feelings that would come with his return. As of right now, though, I was pretending to watch T.V. as Gin sat in the den office, preparing his curriculum for next year's senior class. Besides pondering Gin's seemingly multiple personalities, my mind was still running in circles over two things: Aizen and the key to Gin's private office. As much as I tried to convince myself that the whole 'Taicho' statement over the phone could have been innocent enough, I knew that I was lying to myself. My initial conclusion along with the coincidence of people trailing us in the city had made me nervous that my coincidences were in fact all connected: to Aizen. Gin must have been in contact with Aizen, but why? And why in the world would he meet him? My gut was telling me that just because I knew a little about Gin's past didn't mean that I still didn't need to get into that private office. Which meant I still needed the key and I didn't know where it was. Searching for it had been virtually impossible since Gin had me under close personal surveillance 24/7 and he was in no rush to leave the house since our date. I was no closer to finding it than I had been when I got caught looking on Valentines day.
"No, its not going to happen" a low murmur from down the hall pulled me from my thoughts and I realized the it had become quite quiet in the den. Turning up the T.V. I quietly got off the couch and tiptoed down the hall to the wall of the den office. Putting my ear as close to the door as I could without being seen, I strained to listen to Gin's low voice.
"No, yer not gonna meet 'im. Gomen Taicho I aint bein disrespectful but…this thing don't got nothin to do with 'im!" Gin suddenly snapped, and I heard him move from his chair to pace the floor. "…That was a long time ago Taicho and he's safe now so its got nothin ta do with 'im anymore. I'm askin yah ta leave it alone." A pause. "Do I ever ask yah fer favors?" Another pause and he answered in a tense voice "That was one favor and now I'm askin yah to keep it that way! Look, yah got what yah want so leave us alone. Just let me do my job now." Gin sighed and I heard a shuffle of papers. "Hai, when he delivers the next package, consider it done," he said and snapped his cell phone shut.
Quietly, I made my way back to the couch and sat there blankly for a minute or two. Truthfully, I didn't know what to make of what I had just heard. Most of it didn't make sense since it was out of context but at least I knew that another package was being delivered, whatever the hell that was. And my suspicion about the Taicho being Aizen was basically confirmed. Gin seemed to take careful measures to make sure he never used the man on the phone's real name plus, he had said "yah got what yah want so leave us alone" a statement that would make perfect sense to ward off Aizen. But what had he wanted and what was Gin's 'job' that he had done? Once again, the secrets were bubbling up only this time I didn't want to fake happiness and beg Gin to hold me, I wanted to know the truth. I had put this off for long enough and now I wanted to know…what the hell was going on?
"Oi, Hime yer zonin out again," I heard Gin chirp from the living room doorway and I turned to stare at him openly. He titled his head to the side with a dip in his grin "What's that look fer?"
Biting my lip and turning away I answered lowly "I don't really feel like talking right now."
"Mah, mah still goin with the silent treatment, eh? Its getting kinda old," he hummed but I didn't answer. I was too upset to speak. "Toshiro, stop it," he commanded when the silence stretched on for too long. "You're starting to annoy me. Don't be a baby, its not like you had anywhere to go in the first place."
"…Do you love me?" I asked out loud and closed my eyes when I felt him slip into the couch beside me and wrap his arms around my waist.
"Always."
"Do you want to see me happy?"
"O' course."
"…Then why do I get the feeling you're still lying to me…about Aizen?" Now it was his turn to sit in silence and I looked up at him, hands digging into his arms at the closed off expression on his face. "I'm right aren't I?" I hissed "You're still keeping something from me!"
"No I'm not. Yer makin up stupid ideas in yer head again."
"Am I really? Then tell me, whose been calling you every night?"
"You already know who it is Hime."
"Do I? Do I even know what you say to him? I don't even know why I cant leave the house for god sake, so how do I know what's really going on?"
The snarl that ripped through his chest startled me. "Yah don't need to know what's going on. I know that yah haven't forgot how it is between us just 'cause I've been going easy on yah recently: I tell yah ta do something, yah do it. Since when do I have ta explain mahself?"
"Since you begged me not to leave you when you told me about your past!" I snipped, making him glare at me behind closed eyes. "Did you really think that just because you told me a little bit of information I was going to let all the other weird things happening around here slide forever?"
"I am tryin very hard to remember that yer still a kid and yer probably just actin out-"
"I am not acting out, I want you to tell me whats going on!" I cut him off but he continued smoothly.
"But what you have ta remember is I don't got much patience Hime. Cut the incredulous bullshit and give it up. I told yah what yah wanted to know, now stop questioning me."
"That's not enough Gin, I want more than this."
"For the love o' god," He growled, jerking my shoulders so I could face him. "What more could yah possibly want from me? Yah say I'm too suffocatin, I stopped hittin yah. You want to go out, I take yah on a date all the way in the city. You freak out in bed and cry like a lil bitch so I spill mah guts and this is the thanks I get? Yer gettin mighty demandin Hime and I don't like it one bit."
"Demanding? Demanding!" I cried incredulously. "How can you sit there and call me demanding? When was the last time you took a look at yourself? I have given you everything I have to offer Gin and I never asked for anything besides love and honesty. But you cant give that to me, you have to lie through your teeth at every chance you get!"
"Don't make yerself the innocent martyr in all o' this, Hime. Do you know just how much love you ask for on a daily basis? When we got together I didn't just get a lover, I got a whole emotional sack of bullshit ta tend ta so don't try and tell me I'm too demandin because if anythin yer such a lil love starved puppy yah might be even more demandin than I am! I spend every wakin minute tryin to make sure yah get all the love you've been dying fer, and quite frankly its damn drainin. So I think the level of give and take is about equal, ne?"
If looks could kill I'm sure Gin would have died on the spot. I could feel waves of cold hatred and hurt seeping out from my pores as I painfully fought back tears. "Well," I grimaced, pulling myself from his arms to stand "I am so sorry for all the trouble…but if I remember correctly it was you who came to me. In fact, you promised to save me. I never asked for you to love me Gin, you made yourself do that. You knew who I was and what I wanted the moment you set eyes on me, so don't you dare act like it was some big shock to you to find out I needed to be loved! But you know what, don't worry about spending all your precious energy on me because you can just stop right now! I hope you and Aizen have many happy years together because I don't want to hold you back from what really matters to you, your family."
Even with all the gusto of my speech, I broke into tears, folding in on myself and clutching my own waist painfully. It was things like that that I feared the most, having Gin tell me that loving me was too much trouble and he had found someone much easier to love, who took all his crap without demanding explanations. That he would throw me out on the street the minute I became too much of a load to bear. Wiry arms clasped around me as Gin pulled me into his chest, rubbing his hands down my back but when he tried to kiss my face I pulled away, burrowing my face into my own shoulder and he growled in annoyance.
"Stop it!" he snapped, tugging me back into his embrace, roughly picking me up and heading for the stairs. "You know that's not what I meant." I struggled against his iron grip.
"No! L-let me go you bastard!"
Without another word, Gin stalked to the bedroom, kicking the door open as he still tried to kiss me. When I turned away again with a growl, he dropped me on the bed and began pulling off my clothes, not bothering to unbutton my shirt but instead ripping it hastily, to which I protested loudly. My pants met the same fate as they were tugged off quickly along with my boxers. When I was fully exposed he stopped to rake his eyes over my body, spreading my legs obscenely when I tried to cover my nakedness. His hand reached down to tease my nipples as his other teased my entrance, fingertips dancing across my opening.
"Despite that mouth o' yers, yer so beautiful Hime. Even when yah say dumb things ta piss me off, I still cant get enough o' yah," he mumbled into my neck as he nipped along my jaw line.
"Get off you jerk, you cant solve everything w-with sex.." my voice faltered as he slipped one finger inside of me, the digit moving expertly to find my prostate and hitting it with deadly accuracy. My back bowed and I bit my lip from crying out.
"I love yah, I love yah so much," he hummed, snatching my wrist together and pinning them above my head with one hand. Gin looked into my eyes as he licked his fingers, moving to slip another inside me and I wriggled in discomfort. "I never said I minded lovin yah Hime, even if it's a full time job. And I will save yah, from everythin in this world that could harm yah, even if yah fight me every step of the way because I love yah. I'd die before I let you go." Looking up at his burning eyes, I fought to control my emotions, knowing that Gin knew all the right buttons to push to make me swoon. I wanted to curse and scream and rave but I felt my resolve turn to jelly as he soundly kissed me, pulling away every now and then with my tongue between his teeth and a lick to my lips.
"S-s-stop, I don't want this. Everything you say is a trick and I don't want to hear it," I whimpered pitifully, turning my face away with my last ounce of will power. Gin raised a brow and frowned, moving away. When he raised himself off of me, I felt my body follow involuntarily and he walked to the closet, rifling through the many bags there and turned around with the Sensual Desires one at hand. "Gin…you better not be thinking what I think you are," I hedged, already moving towards the edge of the bed but he was faster.
Like lightning he was over me, handcuffing my hands together with the red chains from Valentines Day through the headboard. I cursed and tried to tug away but it was too late. Placing the bag on the floor besides the bed, he took my half hard cock in hand and slowly stroked me, making me writhe in pleasant agony. The wet sloshing of his hand on my body made me squirm as I imagined all the different positions he could maneuver me into to produce the same sound, amplified by my cries. Just when I thought he would release me so he could pound me into the bed, his head dipped and the brush of silver hair against my thighs was the only warning I got before I felt his flat wide tongue lap at the sensitive head of my cock.
"Ughnn! A-a-ahh argh, oh my-y go-ah! Noooooo, don't!" I moan helplessly beneath his skilled tongue as he went farther, massaging the underside vein with his lips, the head of my erection hitting the back of his throat.
"Yessssss," he hummed happily around me. "Why not? Yer mine. I think yah fergot that so I'll make yer skin burn till yah cant remember anything but the way I make yah feel, that hot helpless feeling you want so much."
"N-uhhh! You ass-" I cut short my heated insult when I felt something tight slip around my dick and Gin's long fingers slid it to the base. Craning my neck up as far as I could to see down my own body, I saw a bright pink circle snuggly sitting against my balls: a cock ring. "….Take that thing off!" I ground out in anger "I cannot believe you actually bought that piece of- argghhhh!" I was cut off again when I felt another sharp pinch to my nipples.
"Shhh, yah complain too much. But look, its pink ta match those pretty lil nipples o' yers. Nice, ne?" he grinned, bending to lick the same nipple he had just treated so harshly.
"No, not nice you deceitful jerk!"
He said nothing but slid down my body, firmly grabbing my hips when I tried to wriggle away. Using both hands, he hefted my legs up onto his shoulders, settling between my legs for an up close, full view of my most private areas. I vainly tried to clamp my legs shut but he only tutted and bent them back further, spreading me wide at the same time.
"Yer twitchin Hime," he breath and I felt his breath skim across my anxious entrance and leaking dick. "Tell me what yah want and I'll give it to yah, I'll give yah everything."
"I want you to tell me the whole truth about Aizen, but you just cant seem to say it! Fuck, why are you doing this? I hate you, don't even touch me!" I cried.
Gin didn't answer but dived in, swirling his tongue around my entrance before drawing lazy patterns across my thigh in saliva that cooled and made me shiver. When he sunk his teeth into my inner thigh, I wailed, jerking away in pain and pleasure. Trailing his way back to my opening, he kissed my balls and rammed his tongue into me as far as it would go. Over and over again he tongue fucked me while I squirmed above him wishing we were chest to chest so I could rub my aching nipples against his own or buck my neglected cock into his stomach. As he poked against my prostate with his wide tongue, my cock bobbled in the cool air of the room, occasionally hitting my stomach. I was in hell, as I tried to impale myself even further but remain angry at Gin. He knew me too well.
Suddenly, I felt two slick fingers enter me, prodding my prostate while scissoring my tight entrance. "Ugh…more," I whined, moaning wantonly before I could stop myself. My brain was turning to mush and I felt his smile against my thigh. He slipped in another two fingers and I screamed in ecstasy as he used them to stretch me open. Just when I thought I couldn't take it anymore and was about to beg him to remove the cock ring, he moved away completely, leaving me to stare bleary eyed at him in confusion. "Wh-wha…please?" I asked hopefully.
"Please what? I thought you didn't want me to touch you, that you hated me."
"P-please Gin, I-I-I lied…" I said on the verge of tears but he backed away, leaning away to pick something up from the bag. I felt something cold and slippery pressing against my prepared ass but when I opened my mouth to ask, it turned into a wild cry. The toy Gin had pushed into me felt wide, digging into my prostate harshly, making me moan every time I shifted, and had something that stopped it from disappearing into me. A butt plug. "Ahh shit, take it out, take it out, take it…." I chanted, head rolling from side to side.
He just grinned wider, getting off the bed completely to pull off his own top. All this time he had kept on his clothes, choosing now to finally undress, when I needed him most. My eyes followed down every inch of skin he exposed, falling on his throbbing penis that sprung up to slap against his stomach when he pulled down his pants. A smear of cum trailed across his navel and I felt my mouth water to lick it up. Looming over me, Gin snapped the handcuffs open to pull it from the headboard but quickly locked them again. He moved my hands to my own erection and knelt in front of me, pulling me to sit up and giving a little show as he stroked his own excitement.
"Touch yerself."
"Wha…" I whimpered, head falling back against the pillows.
"Since yah hate me so much, why don't yah do it yerself," he taunted tightening my hold on myself with his own hands and beginning to jerk me off. But as soon as he moved his hand I stopped and rolled my hips up experimentally, sighing in relief when my cock bumped against his own.
"No, I want you…" I cried, running my hands over his nipples, rolling my hips again.
"Yah sure? How can you know fer sure, I'm a good fer nothing liar."
"Damn it, I'm sure! Please Gin take it out of me."
"Tell me what you want. Clearly."
"I want you," I moaned tears at the corner of my eyes. "You're a liar and you hurt me and make me cry but I love you, I cant help it! So please…please just take it out."
He pushed me back on the bed and yanked out the toy, leaving me wide open and twitching to have something inside of me as a spasm of lust ran though me "I don't hurt yah Hime, yah hurt yerself. All those damn questions o' yers always backfire and leave yah more hurt than I ever wanna see yah," he whispered and slid into me quickly.
"FUCK!" I cried, jerking up to loop my chained wrist together over his neck gracefully. Gin started a fast pace, holding us up with one arm, the other still latched onto my waist and I screamed as each stroke made me twitch in pleasure. "Take off the goddamn cock ring! Shit-t-t. Please. Take. It. Off."
He growled low in his throat when I pulled him down into a searing kiss, slamming into his mouth so fast our teeth clanged painfully on contact. When I bucked again, slipping my now purple erection against the ridges of his stomach I felt his hand deftly dip to remove the cock ring and I hollered into his mouth, cumming almost instantly. I clenched tightly around him, legs falling loosely to the side as my body spasmed irregularly, trying to ride out my orgasm to the last but Gin was still hard. He pulled out quickly, flipping me over onto my knees and I bit into the pillow when he slammed back into me with enough force to skid us across the bed. Rolling my eyes back into my head I cried out nonsensical sounds as he pounded me back into hardness.
"Enough, enough! I cant take it anymore…Gin" I mewled, slumping towards the bed but he pulled my hips right back up, slapping me on the ass sharply in punishment and I yelped.
"That's right, keep moaning fer me Hime. It's the sweetest sound in the whole world when yah call mah name," he rumbled, each thrust echoing the hard slap of skin through the room.
Desperate to end this before I lost my mind, I reached back, pulling his lips to mine and yanked on his hair until he opened his eyes. "Oh god yes, fuck me Gin….just like that. Harder! Oh my-shit! Yes, Fuck me. Fuck me. Fuck me….!" I whined slipping my tongue into his mouth and within the next hard thrust he was digging his palms into my sides and cumming deep inside of me which triggered my own orgasm as well. We stayed like that, sucking face passionately until my knees began to tremble. Gin gently pulled out of me, spreading my cheeks under the pretense of checking for any damage but I knew he just liked to see me flushed, well fucked and dripping with cum; It always creeped me out when he stared for too long so sighing I, rolled onto my back and closed my eyes, ignoring when I felt him lean over me, one elbow beside my head. When he tried to kiss me I groaned, turning away but he held my chin tightly until I opened my eyes.
"Take these off me," I said gesturing to the handcuffs, which he slowly unlocked and threw to the floor.
"Are yah still mad?" he asked quietly, running a hand down my torso.
"I don't know. Maybe if you promise to wear the cock ring next time, I'll forgive you." He chuckled, kissing my face but I continued in a low voice. "One day all this is going to kill me. You're no good for me Gin, you drive me fucking crazy," I whispered stroking his face with a look of confusion.
"But you love me."
"…Yeah. You're probably the only man I'll ever love."
"Probably?"
"Well," I grimaced closing my eyes "A guy like me with so much emotional baggage cant be lucky enough to have you forever. Who knows what you'll do in the future."
He frowned, pulling me close. "That's not what I meant Toshiro. I would leave the world before I leave you. You're perfect the way you are, its just… you have to learn to obey me."
Obey… I echoed in my head, hating how the word sounded, hating how he sounded saying it. When it all boiled down, underneath the 'I love you's' and heated stares, Gin was still a possessive control freak and I might never be able to change that, no matter how hard I tried. "Sure…" I whispered, looking up at him in anger "Its not that hard to obey. But I'll do that right after you explain to me why that man and woman were following us at the museum the other day" Gin stilled, eyes flashing open in what I knew was shock; a hundred different emotions flashed in his eyes before they settled into a closed off stare that gave nothing away. It was as still as the silence in the room. "Yeah that's what I thought. Tell me Gin, can you learn to tell the truth?"
For a while we just stared at each other and for the millionth time and I wondered how it was possible to love somebody so much and despise them at the same time. But eventually, I was too tired and too confused to continue our staring contest so I closed my eyes and nodded off next to Gin's warm chest and his rapidly pounding heart.
~l~
Patience was something I prided myself on, I definitely needed a lot of it to live the kind of life I did. But when Gin began sneaking out late at night, I felt the strings of my sanity begin to twitch. I discovered this several time since the whole M.U. argument but I had chucked it up to him going out for a drink or something. Yet, I knew better. He always left in the dead of night, in black clothes, came back, went into his locked office and left wearing something completely different to come back to bed. And no matter how hard I searched, I could never find those clothes he was wearing anywhere in the house. It didn't happen every night but last night it did, leaving me angry, curious and a little scared. Apparently, his disregard for my intelligence had reached new heights. Did he really believe I wouldn't notice that he had left the bed for hours on end, or did he just not care? Better yet, where the hell was he going? My mind instantly flashed to the idea of him having an affair but I squashed it almost immediately. There was no way Gin would do that (or more like there was no way I would even imagine he would do that because I didn't know if I would kill him or myself first if he did). Currently however, it was midday and Gin was wrapped up in our sheets, sleeping soundly since he clearly hadn't been doing that last night. Sitting up next to him, I glared at his sleeping form heatedly. This giant ass. I hate him. I definitely hate him…who am I kidding, I love him…why do I need him so much? I buzzed angrily in my head. After some time, I realized being next to him was making me feel crowded and much too frustrated to function so I slipped into some jeans and an old sweater, walked downstairs to the backdoor and out the house.
As I pattered barefoot across the yard to the small pond behind the bushes, I vaguely felt a thrill of fear run though me knowing I was disobeying a direct order from Gin. But hes not your mother, a drill sergent, or your master. Listen to how you talk: a direct order. Who the hell gives those to their boyfriend? Gin does, I reminded myself dryly, chuckling in annoyance. Gin orders everyone around, at least everyone I had ever seen him interact with. He was always prodding and poking, finding someone's weak spot and using it to break them down and mold them back into whatever he wanted. And I was frankly tired of it. He always got what he wanted, but what about me? When would I get what I wanted from him? I wanted the truth, not the edited, polished version of what he wanted to tell me; his choice picking of events that showed him in the best light. I wanted to know what I needed to know not what he wanted to tell me. Would he continue to lie to me forever?
'Forever.' Looking down at the golden band on my finger, I felt the urge to chuck it into the pond as I sat on a bench in front of it. The pond was still slightly frozen over and I absently wondered if I jumped in, would I die with a smile as the icy water froze over me in a glacial casket? True they were morbid thoughts but a little part of my mind cheered that for a moment, until Gin found my body, I would be free from him, completely isolated and at peace. It was this ring on my finger that symbolically represented his hold over me at all times that I hated most these days. When someone proposes, which was basically what he had done, isn't there supposed to be some level of joy and ecstasy at the idea of forever with them? When I looked at the ring, it didn't represent our future but out sordid past, of the chokehold he insisted on having over me. My heart is in your hands. Truer words had never been spoken when it came to Gin and I. At some point we had put our heart, lives, and well being into the other's hand; I had done it through blind trust while Gin had probably unknowingly slipped his to me. Was that really even healthy for us to be doing? Probably not, but unhealthy actions were what we did best.
Sighing, I thought to myself The truth shall set you free…right? Doesn't he realize that this could all be over if he stopped lying? I just want some piece of mind! Peace of mind that Gin and I were on the same page, and that we knew the same facts. But despite how hard I tried, he kept locking me out even if it was just a tad bit of information. Truthfully I didn't need to know everything about Gin; that was just an amazingly ridiculous request during arguments to match his demand for complete control over me. But I did need to know crucial things, the kind of things that were making him increasingly violent and possessive, moody. I raised my eyes to the cloudy springtime skies and frowned; well looks like the honeymoon period is over. I knew it wouldn't last.
Only god knows how much time passed as I watched ripples play across the surface of the pond. Somewhere along the line I got lost in my musings and forgot to stay alert. The crack of a twig behind me was all the warning I got before I felt someone yank me up by the back of my shirt. Twirling me around violently, I came face to face with my attacker.
"Gin," I said with a modicum of surprise. "You're awake."
Out of reflex, I had anticipated the slap so I didn't flinch much when he backhanded me. "Are yah crazy o' have I hit yah so many times yuh've lost yer damn mind!" he bellowed, clearly enraged by seeing me outside.
"Neither. I just thought I'd let you sleep a little longer by yourself since you…came in so late. Which is funny since I don't remember you leaving," I said gently.
"Shut the hell up," he hissed, looking around the yard anxiously like he was expecting to see someone jump out of the bushes. Turning his attention back to me he yanked my hair harshly "You are in so much trouble right now…you have no idea what I'm going to do to you."
I couldn't stop the outraged snort that followed, raising a brow daringly "Is that right? Please tell me how I'm the one in trouble when you're making secret phone calls and sneaking out at night! I just assumed that since you were doing whatever the hell you wanted to I might as well join you." He opened his eyes menacingly, grabbing me by the neck in a vise grip but somehow I couldn't bring myself to feel the right amount of fear.
"Hime…I'm going to count to five and pray that you apologize by the time I'm done or so help me god I just might permanently damage you today."
"You know what Gin," I growled, grabbing the ends of his hair and making our faces inch closer as we glared at each other ferociously "Don't hold your breath cause because I'll be apologizing right after you tell me what's really going on between you and Aizen. Come on, tell me about your latest package, or are you too scared to give it to me straight?" I didn't know where this boldness was coming from but lately I had been snapping back at Gin more and more. It was like I couldn't stop my mouth. His nostrils flared as he looked at me in shock and fury.
"I think you really must have lost your mind to speak to me like that. So, I'll just have to spend the day beating some sense back into you."
"Then we should get started right now…" I snapped and he simply backhanded me again, then began to drag me across the yard by my hair.
"Gin," a familiar deep baritone voice cut through the yard in a mocking tone that made me jump in surprise " Do tell me that you do not seriously intend to hurt that boy?" It buzzed and I felt Gin freeze. Unable to see the speaker, I pushed myself from his grip whipping to turn around and gasped in surprise. It was the tall handsome, brown haired man from the mall.
"Pedophile… what are you doing here?" I asked in shock and Gin openly balked at me.
The man laughed richly "Ahh I see little Hitsugaya-kun has not lost his spunk. Are you hurt little one?"
"Little one?" I barked in anger as he edged closer, his white coat billowing behind him as he walked right up to us. A sharp pain in my arm made me look up as Gin tightened his grip on my arm, pulling me into his side and slightly behind him. "Ouch, what the hell is going on? How does this guy know you?"
"Oh," the man chuckled "Do not tell me that he does not know of me Gin."
"How do you know him?" Gin sneered pulling me completely behind him.
"No need to be so protective. We met at the mall, did we not Toshiro?" I nodded yes completely uneasy. "Well, Gin I believe that its time for you give the proper introductions to your little friend here," the man said smoothly but I felt the command behind his words and was confused by it.
"…..Toshiro, I'd like yah ta meet a very old friend o' mine. Aizen Souske."
For a moment, I felt the world stop spinning on its axis, then all the blood rushed from my face. How had I not noticed before? Simple, this man looks nothing like the boy in the picture I had seen. In it he had been much younger and soft around the eyes, hair falling freely about his face. There was nearly no resemblance between the two images besides the glowing, warm brown eyes. Although Aizen was notorious in the country, I had never actually seen him since apparently privacy was something he coveted and now the man was standing right before me. I shuddered and gripped onto Gin's hand tightly.
"Ah, recognition" Aizen buzzed, " So it appears that you do know me Hitsugaya. Did you know that your boyfriend has been hiding you from me for a very, very long time? It would seem he was deathly afraid of us meeting. But I think we get along rather well."
"Y-you're Aizen Souske?" I stuttered. He frowned playfully and leaned towards Gin.
"Perhaps you were mistaken Ichimaru. It seems this one is not so bright."
I snarled, pulling the two away from each other. "What do you want from us ?"
"My my Hitsugaya that was very rude of you. I see why he complains of having to punish you so often."
"What?"
"Alright Taicho," Gin said quickly and I nearly screamed in frustration as my fears were confirmed. "Yuh've got what yah wanted, yah got to see Toshiro. Now I think its time yah leave."
"How cold Gin, am I not invited in for tea this time?"
"This time?" I sneered, moving to stand between the two, looking at Aizen "What the hell do you mean he complains to you about me over tea? Just what are you to Gin?"
"So he does not know, Ichimaru…"
"Aizen-sama, don't…"
"How long do you intend to lie to him Ichimaru? Do you think you can hide it forever?"
"Hide what!"
"Shut up Hime!' Gin roared, pointing at the door. "Get inside. Right. Now."
"Ah, ah ah I don't think so. Starkk is waiting in front with your package so perhaps you should see to that while Hitsugaya and I have a little talk."
"Don't think I don't see what yer tryin ta do here Taicho! I'm askin yah ta go."
"And I'm telling you that its time Hitsugaya and I had a little one on one conversation."
"Ne, Taicho I don't think that's such a good-"
"That wasn't a suggestion Gin, it was an order. Now get moving." Silence fell as Gin stared at him heatedly before moving away from me slowly and my jaw fell slack. For someone to speak to Gin like that and…actually get their way was unimaginable. Without another word, he quickly rounded the side of the house, as though in a rush to return.
"Now Hitsugaya," Aizen hummed "just how much do you know about what's going on?"
Scowling I replied, "Apparently nothing at all."
"I find that hard to believe. Surely you are not so foolish as to not notice that there is something… very off about Gin."
"Tell me the truth, he's working for you again, isn't he…"I whispered.
"Again? Is that what he told you, that he quit? I don't recall him ever stopping."
"What!"
Aizen smiled warmly at me, ignoring the question. "Your lover is probably fast on his way back here as we speak so lets make a deal. The next time Gin takes one of his midnight trips we can finish this little chat, Hitsugaya-kun."
"…Why in the world would you want to talk to me?"
He smiled brightly and his eyes glowered. "Because child, you are so naïve that ultimately, you are in my way," my eyes widened at his menacing tone. "And the longer you stay with Gin under the misguided pretense of love, the more you become a bigger burden to him and our future together."
"What are you talking about? Gin's future is with me, so get him out of whatever sick plans you have in mind!"
"Do you really believe when it all boils down, he will choose you over me? I'm not sure you know who you're boyfriend really is, if you want to even call him that. After all, who do you think was his true love before you showed up?" My eyes widened in shock but he continued relentlessly. "I have been with Gin longer than you have been alive, have seen every side of him; sides you couldn't even fathom. Gin is mine Hitsugaya. You have no future with him."
"Y-you and Gin…were lovers?"
"Hime!" I heard Gin huff behind me but I was too busy trying to keep my brain from short circuiting to answer him.
"Ah, just in time Ichimaru, I am done here. Until next time Hitsugya, I know we'll be seeing each other again" Aizen murmured happily and rounded the corner.
Distantly, I heard Aizen and another man mumbling before there was the sound of a car door shutting and driving off but my mind was far removed from the situation. Something in my head was pounding, beating so furiously that it nearly drowned out the sound of Gin's voice calling me. Their future together….? The way Aizen had said it, he sounded so sure of himself and…seductive, hinting at something much more intimate between the two. Hell he wasn't hinting: he had said he was Gin's true love. What did it mean, what was he saying…what had just happened? I realized I was swaying and steadied myself, look at my feet but my glance was distracted by the glint of gold on my finger. 'My heart is in your hands…my heart…my heart…my…' the words swam in my head making me nauseous until I felt a cool hand on my arm.
"Hime, look at me! Toshiro are yah alright?" The swiftness with which I knocked his hand from me was shocking, seeing as I never remembered consciously moving to do so. Even as he called to me, I turned as if I a trance and walked away, heading up the steps and to the backdoor. "Damn it Toshiro, what did he say to you? What did he do? Talk to me!" Gin hollered but I ignored him, slamming the door in his face when he reached for me, and I laughed, thinking How odd…never before have I felt this hollow. Shaking in some boiling emotion I couldn't describe, I fell into a kitchen chair and tried to keep from screaming.
0_0 what is this? Aizen makes an apperance? Gin starts spazzing out again? Gin sneaking out? A BUTT PLUG AND COCK RING? *faints from drama*Yummmm, delicious plot bunnies running all over the place. I thought it was time for Aizen to get some more spot light, hes such a little egomaniac *eyeroll* And yes, I finally revealed what was in that Sinfully Delicious bag: butt plug, bright pink cock ring and some lube I forgot to mention. Gin's the best boyfriend ever, isnt he? Getting all those nice presents for Toshi...heheheheh. Well, its happened, mean Gin is back and Toshi is crying again, just as the world should be. Those two are really all about having a rollercoaster relationship. Next chapter means moorrrreee drama! Sidenote: I had that playlist on my profile but...dear lord I listen to too much music. Hence, I wont be updating it anymore, too much work and the soundtrack for Lock and Key would stretch on for days...but heres a song i think describes Toshi so well : Bruises by Chairlift. Listen to it, ne? Its a little mild but it describes him bending over backwards for Gin and still ending up black, blue and utterly defeated. T_T Please review. Please? it will keep my mind off my steadily declining GPA, which will keep my mind of SATs which will keep me from realizing that with each bad grade I get farther and farther from the Ivy Leauges. *Sigh* A day in the life of a student = never ending doubt. Dontcha just loovveee high school? =/ CIAO!