Things Never Change II

Chapter 13

DISCLAIMER: The characters depicted, setting, and various terminology used in this fan based work are property of Masashi Kishimoto. The views and opinions of this fan based work in no way reflect the views or opinions of Masashi Kishimoto. This fanfiction was written purely for entertainment purposes and the author of this fan based work receives no monetary gain in writing this.

WARNING: Contains content NOT suitable for children under the age of 16, and readers are strongly cautioned. The following contains but is not limited to, light sexual situations, non descriptive rape, inappropriate language, violence, character death, and male on male relationships.

There are many flashbacks here for Naruto I tried to cut them out, but I couldn't.

AN: Did my best for a quicker update please let me know what you think of this chapter. I appreciate every review I receive trust me, it helps keep my spirits up at a time when I'm not doing so well. So thank you all who have been reviewing. : )

Naruto sat behind Shibuki's desk and stared at the carefully piled papers, and personal effects that cluttered the desk. This was the desk of Kage? The desk looked like any other desk. It was hard to believe when he sat down behind this desk he became Takikage. He warily pulled out the chair and sat down gently. He instantly felt overwhelmed.

"Taki….kage… …Ho…kage…" he whispered sorrowfully.

His mind was torn between the past and present. He placed his head in his hands and sat there. His fingers gripped at his hair, and his heart thudded painfully in his chest. He knew he should be doing something, but he couldn't move. His whole body fought against his every attempt to move. He was so conflicted just to be sitting there, that he could hardly breathe.

The whole village was his responsibility now, but not just the village and it's buildings but the people's lives who inhabited this village, were now his responsibility. They were all counting on him to keep them safe. These thoughts did nothing to aid the blonde's mind and caused his heart to race and his head to ache more than before. Although the pressure he felt was nothing compared to the guilt he harbored within. His blue eyes reflected his mood no matter how hard he tried to hide it. His memories rendered him incapable of movement as they flooded his mind.

"Say, Naruto can I ask you something?"

"I guess."

"Why didn't you tell me you were next in line for Takikage?" asked Shikamaru.

Naruto frowned, but answered anyways. "Because, I already refused the position." He replied flatly.

"But back in Konoha you were always going on about how you wanted to be Hokage! Why now would you give up on your dream?" Shikamaru nearly yelled.

"My dream?" Naruto answered hollowly, "My dreams died a long time ago."

"Naruto…." Shikamaru said softly staring at him. "But why?"

The blonde's mouth curved downward into a scowl, and he shook his head slowly trying to stop the memory from replaying in his mind, but his efforts were in vain as another memory washed over him.

"To be Hokage, that is my dream!" echoed in the blonde's mind and caused his eyes to widen with shock due to the memory.

The blonde recalled the countless times he put his life on the line just to get a chance to obtain this ONE dream. Back then it was a chance to protect everyone, a chance to prove his worth, and a chance to be someone else. Half of his life so far had been devoted to the pursuit of this one day, this one dream, but why now was his wish granted? He'd given up on that dream. The day he left Konoha is the day he truly let this ambition die. He imagined fate was laughing at his cruel situation.

Today really should be such a happy occasion for most. He was titled Takikage and was respected by all the villagers, but it felt like he cheated. He felt like he didn't deserve to be sitting behind this desk, nor to have the village trust him so not when he was harboring such a foul secret.

The cold morning air bit at his wet cheeks as he ran, but it didn't matter all Naruto could think about was running as far from Konoha as his feet could get him. His lungs ached and his legs pulsated painfully by the time he reached the outer rim of trees that surrounded the village. He collapsed on the ground gasping in air through sobs.

As he hit the ground he could feel the strong suction of chakra pulling rapidly back into his body, back to the wretched fox within him. The pure force of the chakra took his breath away momentarily. His face wrinkled up as he screamed loudly in his anguish.

"I'm truly a monster now." He muttered aloud.

He held his arms up and cringed at the blood stains that covered them. The thick coppery smell made his stomach wretch and he almost threw up where he kneeled. His eyes spilled over as he realized the severity of his actions. His body shook and tears slid down his face leaving streaks of pink down his cheeks.

Konoha was no longer a place he could call home.

'I can't ever come back.'

He stood clenching his trembling fists tightly and waited for his tears to dry, and began running again. Running as fast and far as he could.

Today it seemed he would inevitably relive many upsetting memories, all from sitting behind this desk.

Taki now had a murderer for a Kage. Naruto looked down at his hands and grimaced as though they were still stained with blood. Even after all these years he could still smell the blood when he recalled the day. He closed his eyes with disgust. He took the life of a fellow Leaf shinobi that night he fled Konoha. He had killed a 'comrade'. There was no way if the villagers knew they'd be so accepting of him now. He never even told anyone about killing the ANBU that night of the storm. He hadn't even told Shibuki about that. No, he kept that painful secret to himself along with guilt.

"I don't deserve to be here." he spoke quietly to himself allowing his head to hit the desk with thud.

Naruto lifted his head as he heard a knock on the office door, and called out.

"Yes?" he asked.

The door immediately swung open revealing a disheveled shinobi of Taki. He was bent over panting loudly. Naruto looked at him with a look of apprehension in his eyes. He watched trying to remember who he was while he caught his breath. He hadn't had time to look into who had gone on missions and there estimated return times. The man looked up to see Naruto and his eyes shone with confusion.

"Naruto-sama? Has Lord Takikage passed on?" he asked in a state of shock as he assumed the worst.

"No, but his health is declining, and he asked me…to…" he struggled with the right words. "I'm filling as takikage until he recovers."

"I see."

The shinobi nodded and Naruto took a closer look at him, and recognized this man. He was part of a four man squad sent out to gain intel on the current status of Konoha and Suna. He looked ragged and his presence alone bothered Naruto. Where were the other squad members? Naruto's stomach flopped.

"I have something report." He stated gravely.

Naruto nodded listening vigilantly to the shinobi who stood before him.

"The fighting between Konoha and Suna has already begun."

Naruto felt his chest tighten. So it had finally come to war. Things were not going well at all. Two of the five great shinobi nations have declared war against one another, and it would only be a matter of time before the rest prey on their weakness and drag these smaller countries into their war. It's possible Takigakure could be turned into a battle ground. Naruto frowned.

"Where is the rest of your squad?" Naruto asked hesitantly.

The shinobi before him looked to the ground and shook his head. Naruto's pulse quickened watching the downcast look he had. Naruto knew without him stating so, that he was all that was left of his squad, but he hoped it wasn't the case.

"They're dead."

"How?"

"We were attacked by Konoha's ANBU." He replied.

"I see." He replied with down casted eyes and a pause. "We'll hold a memorial service in their honor, but in the mean time go have Shizuku look over your wounds."

"Hai, Takikage-sama."

Naruto watched as he left with a sense of dread. ANBU of Konoha killed three of his comrades. He unconsciously clenched his jaw and his fists shook at his sides. His first day as Takikage, and he lost three men not to mention Konoha now knows Taki was spying on them. Naruto knew he couldn't ensure the village's safety anymore.

They may be attacked at anytime, by Konoha. What would he do then? He gritted his teeth. There would be no way to win against Konoha without an alliance with another one of the great nations. He immediately thought of Gaara, but dismissed it. The Sand Village was in shambles and even with the help of this small village would be destined for ruin. Allying with Suna was impractical.

Another knock at the door sidetracked him from his thoughts.

"Come in." Naruto requested.

"Taki…ah…Naruto-sama, I think you should publically announce your promotion to Takikage." Tenteki stated uncomfortably.

"No, today we'll be holding a memorial service for three devoted shinobi who died yesterday while away on a mission."

"Who?" he asked worriedly.

"It was Tansui's team. Konoha ANBU caught and killed them."

Tenteki's face dropped. He knew the state of the great nations from Shibuki, and knew this would be a hard time to be Kage of any village and by no means envied Naruto. Tenteki knew soon Naruto would have some difficult decisions to make.

"I'll make the arrangements right away." Tenteki replied bowing before leaving hurriedly.

After Tenteki left to make arrangements Naruto headed home to rest and think about his next move. He couldn't stand to be at that desk and he couldn't visit Shibuki right now. He couldn't tell him all the unpleasant news from today. He couldn't stand to see the disappointment or worry in Shibuki's eyes. Shibuki had such high hopes in him, and right now he couldn't face Shibuki without a plan to fix things.

Naruto sighed. He needed a plan. He couldn't afford to act recklessly. Normally he wouldn't mind just rushing in, but it wasn't just his life on the line anymore, now the weight of the whole village was on his back. His trembling back.

'I'm not cut out to Takikage.' Naruto thought.

Shikamaru slowly picked up his head from the table where Shizuku had left him some time ago. He held his arm at eye level and looked over his healing appendage. The dull ache and slight itching sensation proved it was healing finally. It seemed she'd done a good enough job even if her heart wasn't into it.

He sighed letting his arm fall to the table in despair although he immediately regretted doing so as pain shot up his arm causing him to hiss audibly.

Shikamaru was so focused on the pain in his arm he hadn't heard the front door open or close, nor had he seen the troubled blonde walk in.

Shikamaru's gaze fixed on the grains of wood in the table. This isn't how things were supposed to be. He clutched his fist as tightly as he could to stop the tears he felt welling up in his eyes. He released his grip and sighed after a few moments.

"I really don't deserve to be here do I?" Shikamaru asked aloud once more expecting to be met with the same silence again.

"Shikamaru…?" the blonde managed to say.

Shikamaru's eyes widened with the surprise of hearing Naruto's voice so unexpectedly. He gradually turned his head to look at the blonde standing there in the kitchen. He noticed Naruto's eyes reflected sorrow, and in turn it made Shikamaru plummet deeper into his own shame.

"It's not true!" Naruto snapped childishly. "Why would you even say that?" the blonde yelled.

Naruto watched Shikamaru waiting for an answer to his question, but the brunette didn't provide one. Instead he looked away from Naruto, causing the blonde's heart to beat rapidly in his throat. He immediately felt as though he'd done something wrong. Maybe he should've pretended not to hear Shikamaru's words.

"Because it's true." Shikamaru replied forlornly.

Naruto now stood next to him and had slammed his fists down on the table causing the brunette to look up at his face. Shikamaru felt awful to see the blonde's anguished face.

"You deserve to be here!" he yelled.

"Do I? Then why did you bring me back here with you?" Shikamaru yelled.

Naruto looked stunned as Shikamaru stood from his chair and was within inches from his body. Shikamaru's feelings have gotten way out of hand and his longing for Naruto to love him back were too intense at that moment.

"I….uh…" Naruto stammered looking away from Shikamaru.

"How do you feel about me? I need an answer." Shikamaru asked desperate to hear Naruto returned those feelings.

The blonde had hoped this wouldn't come up again, because now especially he was unable to allow himself to admit how he truly felt. Not after being reminded just how unworthy he was of happiness. He looked away with scarlet cheeks and teary eyes. Things seemed to be falling apart. His heart raced and his palms were sweaty.

"I'm sorry, I don't feel the same." Naruto answered softly.

"Damn it! Stop lying to me!" Shikamaru shouted.

"I'm not lying." the blonde answered still unable to look Shikamaru in the eyes.

He'd waited so long and searched far too hard to find Naruto to give up this easily especially when Naruto seemed to be hiding something. But what could he do other than tell Naruto how he felt? The brunette's eyes widened in realization, and he decided it was now or never.

"Look me in the eye and tell me you don't care about me." Shikamaru declared seriously.

Naruto felt a hand on his chin tenderly pulling his face to look at Shikamaru. Naruto instantly felt his cheeks heating up with the brunette's touch. It was then their eyes met, and Naruto hated the look in Shikamaru's eyes. The look alone made the blonde's stomach flip flop, and made him forget the past briefly. They revealed his feelings of desire and love. Being able to stare into his chocolate eyes this closely meant the world to Naruto, even if he couldn't allow it to last much longer.

"Stop, I can't do this." Naruto said staring at the floor.

He knew what Shikamaru was about to do but he was helpless to stop it, and before he could say anything else their lips met in a gentle kiss. The warmth from his lips and the feel of Shikamaru's trembling hand sent tears to the blonde's eyes.

'Shika…don't do this….'

He never wanted this kiss to end, but he knew it had to, so with a grave heart he pushed Shikamaru breaking their bond quickly, but most definitely not painlessly. Naruto felt like dying but he couldn't show it. He had to keep Shikamaru away from him.

"Stop." He muttered once again.

Naruto felt like his heart shattered like glass at that point. Shikamaru looked so hurt by his lies. He wished with all his being that he could make things between them work, but he couldn't or rather he felt undeserving of his love. It was his punishment, his penitence.

"Fine." the brunette said as he turned heading towards the front door.

"Shikamaru wait!" Naruto shouted as he watched Shikamaru's retreating back. "I'm sorry! Please don't leave! Not like this!" Naruto yelled frantically.

"Alright." Shikamaru replied entirely drained of emotion in his voice.

The brunette looked back at Naruto with a fake smile, but his eyes weren't smiling. They were dead. Shikamaru didn't want Naruto to know how terrible he really felt right now. He saw the pain that crossed Naruto's features a second ago when he tried to leave, and knew he caused it. He just couldn't do that again. He'd caused the blonde enough pain for a life time.

"I'm the one who should be sorry." He whispered and walked away into the living room.

Shikamaru threw his body down forcefully on the couch, and scrunched his eyes shut. He heard the front door slam shut but made no attempt at movement. Naruto made it quite clear he didn't want Shikamaru around.

'So this is how things end for those who seek what they don't deserve…' he sighed sorrowfully.

Naruto ended up in his usual spot gazing down at the clear water below with downcast eyes. His shoulders slumped and his knees were drawn up towards his chest. He rested his head on his knees.

'Why did I bring him here?' he asked himself.

He knew bringing the brunette here could only end in misfortune, so why had he done it? He sat for a long time contemplating, and eventually realized how selfish he'd been by bringing Shikamaru here without the intention of returning his feelings. He grimaced.

"I'm the one who should be sorry." He recalled the brunette's whispered words.

He groaned knowing well this was his fault and the blame rested solely on his shoulders. It was he who should've been sorry not Shikamaru. Naruto couldn't get the brunette's crestfallen face from his thoughts. He scowled at his reflection on the clear water's surface.

Just like the rest of his troubles he didn't know what he should do. It's hard to believe so much could happen in one day, but maybe it was his punishment. It had to be. He couldn't stand to believe this was just how things were meant to be.

'Shikamaru…I'm so sorry…' he thought as tears threatened to fall.

He kept his eyes lowered even as he felt someone sit beside him. He already knew there was only one person who would casually sit next to him like that. He couldn't look at her right now with eyes about to overflow with tears. He felt like no matter what he was supposed to be strong around her.

"I'm sorry I just found out about Tansui's team." She said aloud with a frown.

"Yea, the memorial service is later this evening." He replied matter-of-factly.

"Tansui's injuries weren't serious and he'll make a full recovery."

"I'm glad to hear it." he smiled halfheartedly.

Shizuku leaned back on the tree and gazed up at the sky. She tried to smile but it was no use she could feel Naruto's pain within her own heart. She'd watched over Naruto for years, and she knew much more was on his mind. She usually stood by and waited for Naruto to talk to her, but this time was different. There was this feeling in her gut that told her to talk to him. It was obvious he was hurting, and his pain caused her pain.

"You know I've been watching over you for a long time, and I've never seen you this way."

Naruto looked up at her for the first time since she sat down next to him. He wasn't sure what to say to her, he had known her presence all along. He knew she watched over him a lot especially when he first arrived here in Taki. He knew her feelings well, but they were feelings he'd never be able to return.

"I've loved you all this time." She said quietly.

"Shizuku-chan…I…" he tried to find the right words to let her down easily, but she interrupted his attempt.

"It's okay. I finally understand."

"Understand what?" he asked confused.

"After talking to Shikamaru, it's clear I never even had chance to find a place in your heart." she replied with a weak smile.

Naruto's wide eyes watched Shizuku. Her face was red with embarrassment, but she didn't let it stop her from revealing her true feelings.

"You're in love with him." she confirmed.

"You've got it wrong he's… just…just..." he paused with a sigh trying to think of a lie.

"He's just your true love…" she finished for the blonde teasingly to lighten the mood.

"No, it's not like that. He's just a friend."

"I can tell he loves you by the way he talked about you when I was fixing his arm."

"I think you're mistaken."

"No, I could tell. He feels the same as I do for you." She said looking into Naruto's eyes.

"I'm sorry Shizuku-chan, I've known of your feelings for a long time now, and I just didn't want to hurt you, but I should have told you sooner."

"It's okay I've known for a while you weren't ever going to return my feelings, but at least I know why now." She replied.

The two sat in silence for a while, but surprisingly it wasn't an awkward silence. Shizuku sat wondering just what happened for them to end up like this.

"What happened between you two?"

Naruto didn't have an answer for her. It was just too long a story. He shook his head and glared at the water. Where would he even begin? It was far too painful to recount.

"Too much to fix now." he muttered.

"I'm sure you can fix by telling him the truth."

"I told you were just friends."

"I can tell you love him." she goaded him.

Naruto kicked the water to rid it of his own reflection. Shizuku jumped back startled by his sudden violent outburst.

"Naruto?" she said concerned for him.

"I…just don't know what to do." He admitted.

"Well, first why don't you try telling him how you really feel about him."

"I can't do that." He replied sadly.

"Why not?" she asked.

"I don't deserve him." he answered dismally.

Shizuku grabbed Naruto's hand tightly and pulled him to face her. He sat there unable to move shocked by her bold actions. She looked angry, and for a second Naruto was certain she was going to hit him.

"What are you doing?" he asked confused.

"You deserve to be happy." She said before she kissed his cheek. "Even if it's not with me." She added with a grin.

Naruto was too stunned to move even as she hugged him tightly. He finally regained composure and hugged her back. He was glad to have her around, and contrary to what she may think he always had room in his heart for his 'little sister'.

"Thanks."

Shikamaru decided he needed to apologize to Naruto and found him by the tree near the entrance to the village. He smiled seeing Naruto sitting there, but his smile was short lived as he saw Shizuku lean in and kiss him.

He stood there unable to move, unable process what he was seeing. His heart thumped loudly in his ears. That young kunoichi just kissed Naruto, and he didn't push her aside like he had Shikamaru. Tears formed in his eyes watching as Naruto hugged the young girl.

"I'm sorry, I don't feel the same." the blonde's words echoed in his mind.

The brunette's eyes widened as he understanding who Naruto's heart belonged too, and it all started to make sense. He regained movement of his legs soon after. It was over. He was in love with her. Tears ran down his face as he turned to run away from the scene before him.

Naruto looked up after hugging Shizuku to see Shikamaru running away. He jumped up quickly went after Shikamaru.

"Sempai, you have to tell him this time!"

Naruto nodded. "I will!"

He wasn't sure still if he deserved to be with Shikamaru or not, but maybe he'd give it a try. He caught up with Shikamaru just outside the village.

"Where are you going?" Naruto yelled.

Shikamaru stopped without turning to face Naruto. He couldn't let him see how hurt he was, but he couldn't hide the hurt in his voice no matter how hard he tried. He couldn't hide his trembling shoulders either. Naruto bit his lip. This was his fault.

"Leaving."

"Why?"

"There's no reason for me to stay."

Shikamaru had no idea how severely those words stung the blonde. His chest tightened, and his eyes watered. He began to wonder if he was too late. No, it couldn't be. He had to try!

"I'm sorry….I…" he started but was interrupted by a kunai thrown at him.

Naruto dodged the kunai with ease, but his senses were on high alert. He jumped back several feet. Shikamaru turned to see what was going on and sensed a familiar chakra. His eyes burned with a flame of hatred and blood thirst.

"What the hell are you doing here?" he called out angrily. "I'm not going back to Konoha!" Shikamaru yelled.

Naruto looked in the direction the kunai had come from. His chest suddenly hurt him. His hand subconsciously grazed the old scar on his chest. His eyes narrowed as the man who gave him the scar jumped down from the trees. They glowed red momentarily.

"I'm here for the jinchuuriki, but I can kill you too if you like."

Shikamaru jumped to Naruto's side ready to fight. Naruto stood his ground unafraid of the man before him. Shikamaru's heart raced seeing one of Danzou's men out this far. Shikamaru moved to attack, but Naruto blocked him.

Shikamaru stared at the blonde with a shocked expression. He noticed the fire in Naruto's eyes and backed down. He was confused how did Naruto know this man? He looked as though he had a personal grudge against him.

Naruto, you know him?"

"That's him, the one who scarred me." He replied lifting his shirt up slightly to show Shikamaru the scar on his chest.

The brunette grimaced at the raw look of it even though it had been four years since the wound had been inflicted.

"You mean…he's the one who…"

"Yea. He's the one who almost killed me."

"Don't worry I'll make sure your dead this time." The pale man responded with a smile.

Shikamaru lunged at the anbu but again. "I'll kill you!"

"Stay out of this." Naruto hissed with rage.

AN: Well that's it for this chapter! : ) Let me know what you think and if you have a title suggestion let me know.