I'M BACK! A/N at the bottom guys :)

DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. All the lovely characters belong to Stephenie Meyer—unfortunately. The OC's however, I do own *muahahahaha* .

Would someone care to classify
Our broken hearts and twisted minds
So I can find someone to rely on
And run to them, to them
Full speed ahead

-Misguided Ghosts—Paramore

Alex POV

POUND.

THROB.

SCRATCH.

POUND. POUND.

THROB.

SCCRRAATTCCHH.

You know you've had a bad day when your mental stability has drifted so far into the deep end that it is making up percussion beats to your ailments. Everything was synchronized, the throbbing of my countless bruises—really more like my entire body, the pounding in my head, and the slight drag of my left leg every time I took a step. And to be perfectly honest, it was quite a catchy tune.

It had taken me about a mile, but I finally managed to let my mind go blank. After that I blocked out everything. No more Caleb, no more evil revenge tangents, no more Edward, no more Nessie, no more Cam, no more wolves…scratch that, there was still one of those. At least that's what I think my left side is leaning against at the moment. Ok mind, you're blank, not stupid. Of course Seth was still there. It's not like I could ignore him, not when he's this close. I had become almost hyper aware of him in our short time together, I didn't even need to see him…I just knew.

And it was starting to freak me out.

I shook my head to try to scatter the feelings away but no matter how hard I tried they kept adding together in an equation that I could not even begin to understand. It escalated to one point; the only point that had managed to infiltrate my mental blocks. The one little detail that Caleb just couldn't leave alone:

Mated at seventeen.

Mated? Me? I felt my eyes roll on their own accord. No, not possible. First off, it doesn't work that way, not even with supernaturals. You don't just look at someone and go, "POOF! I am your soul mate MUAHAHAHA fear me—love me!" Ok, so maybe that was a little overboard but my mental intelligence has deflated for the day so sue me. But all that aside, it's a process. Love at first sight doesn't exist. It scientifically can't.

Take the particularly fuzzy specimen to my left. Werewolves choose mates based off the survival of the species. It's quite simple: the strong mate with the strong to better and maintain the bloodlines. Vampires are special of course and it's not because of their sparkles. They can actually afford to be selfish and lovey-dovey. After all, "mating" in their terms is simply finding someone whom they can tolerate for eternity. Werewolves are a little more animalistic so to speak.

So the fact that my formerly-good-turned-evil best friend was suggesting that I am mated to Seth of all people is about as plausible as Satan making snow cones. A strong match my ass. I'm a stray he picked up in the woods not someone of fantastic native bloodline that will produce bomb-proof werewolf babies. Hell, the two of us are so complete opposites that if for some impossible reason the werewolf species depended on us…well let's just say Seth would maybe last a day before I killed him.

Conclusion: my evil best friend is an asshole who likes messing with me.

I let out a long sigh. This was one seriously fucked up situation. Here I am fresh out of a showdown with my all-but-deranged past. A showdown in which evil vampires pretty much threatened to kill me, and the one thing I'm dwelling on is whether or not I have the prospect of an eternal boyfriend?

What the hell is wrong with me?

Seth's abrupt stop sent me toppling to my left. I didn't even try to stop myself as my side made hard contact with the forest floor. It was just way too much energy to even attempt to get up. So I just closed my eyes and lay there. Breathing… I think.

"Hmmmm," I cracked my eyes open to find Cam perched over me. "I give you a solid eight out of ten for formation… the landing, however, needs some work."

I snorted in response.

"Do you want me to help you up or are you content in your awkwardness?" The smirk on her face told me she already knew my answer.

"Content, thank you," I said in mock politeness and closed my eyes again.

"Fair enough," she retorted and I could feel her walking around me. "But I do feel somewhat responsible so I had to ask. It was Brady's fault Seth stopped so technically speaking we made you make out with the leaves."

She was rambling. If I had to bet I would almost say it was on purpose. Like she knew I had no energy to respond, so she might as well keep going. Creepy.

"I mean Jacob stopped, so Leah stopped, then Brady stopped and it's this stupid pack thing that they play damn follow the leader. But apparently they don't 'cause Jake and Leah just took off to God knows where, but if I had to guess I'd say that went to rendezvous with Edward to discuss you're impossibly complicated predicament which inadvertently means that they trust in these two's ability to get us home safely way too much for my liking and—

"Cam," I spoke with just enough volume to get her attention but my mind was still reeling with her tangential masterpiece. I met her gaze, "I get it."

"Thank God," she huffed. "I didn't know how much more air I had to keep that damn thing going." She let out a whoosh of breath from her teeth and plopped next to a particularly tall tree.

"It was quite impressive though," I chuckled and felt Seth lay down behind me. His warmth pressed to my backside. The contact was making me drowsy.

"Noted," Cam smiled. "Soooo…"

She drew the word out in such a way that I couldn't help but roll my eyes.

"Yes, oh master of transitions?" My question was met by her half-hearted glare.

"Haha I am so talented, but alas there are more important things." She put a hand to her forehead dramatically and paused for good measure before unleashing a full-out glare, "Like for instance, what the hell is going on?"

As a last effort I hefted my body to the right and turned my back to my overly-enthusiastic companion.

"Smooth," I heard her grumble. "Fine then, you leave me no choice."

One intake of breath later and I was met with the most earsplitting version of Poker Face that even Lady GaGa herself would have keeled over. Brady actually howled in response.

"Okay! Okay!" I screamed over the noise, my hands clamped to my ears for good measure.

The nonsense stopped.

"Ah, so you have figured out resistance is futile?" Cam mused as she sat crossed-legged in front of me.

"Just so you know," I groaned as I pulled myself into a sitting position, "you are a horrid person. Taking advantage of my depleted mental state and all."

"Thank you," she said and I rolled my eyes again. "After all, I had to strike while the chance was there. It's not every day that Seth can get away with making you face-plant. You cuddling up to him instead of whacking him upside the head gave me just enough leeway to manipulate you into my clutches." Cam tapped her fingers together in that evildoer way as her mouth set into a wide Cheshire cat grin.

I shook my head before closing my eyes and telling them exactly what had happened between Caleb and I that afternoon.

"So long story short," my eyes popped open at Cam's voice though I found nothing but leaves in front of me. "Your best friend was turned into a vamp and now he wants to kill you to rid himself of the ghosts from Christmases past?"

"Pretty much," I said as I leaned back into Seth.

I was a little worried about how my overprotective guard dog would take the series of events, but he had been surprisingly silent throughout the whole thing. No growls or snarls just complete silence. And if I were completely honest, it freaked me out more than if he had blown a casket.

"Well," this time I placed her voice and my head shot up to see her dangling a good fifteen feet up a tree. "At least you know he will be sentimental about killing you," Cam insisted as she started swinging from the branch more forcefully.

I gaped. A fall from that height… Well, it would hurt to say the least. I heard crunching and turned to find Brady in a similar state of panic. His giant wolf head rocked back and forth with each of Cam's swings. Seth had even perked up enough to watch.

"How's that?" I questioned not taking my eyes off of her form.

"He's your best friend right?" She said as she swung and hooked her calves above her. Now she at least had four limbs attaching her to the tree. But there was the small detail that she was now upside down.

"For arguments sake, sure, he's my best friend," I hedged carefully.

"Then he still has some deep, dark, locked-away feelings for you. Therefore," she emphasized as she let her arms go and Brady just about died, "Caleb won't kill you just because he can. He'll kill you will some feeling, some purpose. And at least that's better than the alternative."

I honestly couldn't tell if this reasoning made me feel any better. Was it supposed to?

"Hey Cam?" I questioned at her dangling form, desperate to change the subject.

"Yes, Grasshopper?"

"Could you, oh I don't know, come down?" I sighed as her swinging slowed and I turned my eyes to her wolf. "Preferably before Brady has a heart attack?"

"Sure." She said it with such conviction that my brain registered one single thought.

That was way too easy.

My head snapped up and before I could blink Cam was plummeting to the ground.

And right into Brady.

I hadn't even registered what happened before I found my body sprinting over to the two tangled bodies, Seth right behind me. We stopped and gazed at the sight. Neither one of us had a clue as to what to do.

A weird chorus of hysterical laughter and growling filled the air and I breathed a sigh of relief as I realized that Cam was at least still alive. From what I could gather from their current position it looked as if she had hit Brady right in the stomach. And unfortunately for him, said stomach had acted as a safety net. It was a good thing he was supernaturally durable. Cam on the other hand, couldn't stop laughing.

I glanced at Seth and saw his muscles tense in anticipation. His eyes never left Brady and I found my eyes following and they widened at the sight. Brady was livid. His face contorted in an emotion so potent that I wondered right then if this would be the last time I would see Cam alive.

"Uh, Cam…" I tried to get her attention all the while keeping my eyes on Brady.

Without warning he flipped. Literally. One moment Cam is lying haphazardly across him and the next Brady is pinning her to the ground with such force that I thought for sure he had hurt her.

"Brady!" I shouted, trying to distract him. A part of me knew he wouldn't hurt her, that he couldn't hurt her. But no matter how you twisted it, seeing someone pinned underneath a snarling thousand pound wolf sends just a slight jolt of panic through your system.

Seth moved in front of me then, slanting his body to use as a barricade between me and Brady. My eyes fell to Cam and every ounce of laughter had left her face and was replaced by something close to shock as she blinked up at her enraged werewolf.

For a long moment no one moved. We stood frozen, the only sound being that of Brady's growls. And suddenly it stopped. The silence was so complete that I chanced a glance around in wonder. Nothing moved, not even the trees swayed in the wind. My eyes fell back to the couple before us. Brady had stopped growling, but his breathing was still erratic. Cam had shaken herself out of the shock enough to grab his attention with her hand grasping the fur near his chest.

"I'm sorry."

It was so serious, so blatant, that I could not believe it had come from Cam. All her previous good-natured hyperness, all her comedy, was broken by that one sentence and for once I saw a glimpse of the Cam I was sure no one but Brady knew. The words broke the eerie calm and settled things back to normal. Seth and I breathed a collective sigh of relief as Brady stared her down for a few more seconds then moved off of her. I moved to help her up.

"I believe that's Brady 1, Cam 0," I chuckled without humor as I hoisted her upright.

She looked up at the branch she had perched on not three minutes before as she spoke, "I guess that wasn't the smartest idea." Her eyes shifted to Brady's form beside her.

"No, not really," I smirked at her returning glare. "But," I emphasized to grab her attention, "it was incredibly amusing. I thought for sure he was going to kill you, or at least maim you."

"Nah," Cam gave a noncommittal wave and I could see some of her humor returning. "It takes a lot more than an infuriated puppy to finish me off."

Brady rumbled a growl.

Cue Cam's return.

I smirked as she ruffled the fur behind Brady's ear before she hopped up onto his back. Not this again. My eyes rolled on their own accord. I started when Seth suddenly appeared in front of me. Waiting. Déjà vu? I think yes.

"Cam," I whined like a two year old.

"Alex do not make me force you," that evil glint was back, "or better yet," she mused, "don't make me make Seth force you."

I eyed the wolf in front of me and could have sworn he smirked wickedly in response.

Damnit.

"Fine." I consented, not seeing any way out.

As I eased closer to Seth, I tried to reason with myself. I liked speed. I had no problem with going fast. In fact, I had no problem with the riding part either. I used to ride horses, so it shouldn't be that different. Just lower and longer strides… and it was Seth. Some part of me knew he wouldn't throw me on purpose. But it was still a trust issue, which was utterly absurd. It was that stupid exercise where you fall back into your partner's arms and trust them to catch you. Except in this case your partner was a huge ass wolf with supernatural powers. I sighed. I had never been good at trust.

Almost as if reading my mind, Seth craned his head and nudged my arm. My eyes locked with his. I saw the same thing that I always saw. The thing he had been trying to get me to do since I first met him.

Trust me.

I took a breath and vaulted myself up onto his back.

Phew! Ok, so that took a little longer than I expected. I was going to lay down a heavy imprinting chapter on you guys but I figured what the hell I feel like some comedy instead.

And I want to THANK ALL OF MY REVIEWERS for their wonderful support and patience this past month. The pony is happy now and everything is sound and the way it should be :)

Hope you guys liked the Cam/Brady fiasco. I had fun with it *evil smirk*

Thanks for reading!—HV

**That button is looking a little blue—I think it needs some lovin'**