Edited:5/28
"Jesus, this shit is expensive," Jax exclaimed in the middle of the baby store causing a few glares to be sent his and Delilah's way, which Delilah returned to them as Jax continued, "I don't understand this crib is $400 and on top of that I got to buy the mattress what kind of shit is that?"
"Kids are expensive, Jax," Delilah replied turning her attention back to Jax, who was leaning over the rail of a crib and proceeding to check how sturdy it was.
Jax wasn't in his usual leather kutte for their trip in pricing baby furniture. He was just in a simple white t-shirt and jeans. It was almost weird for her to not see Jax in his omnipresent kutte. It almost made him seem like a total different person. It made him look softer.
"Just wait until he is older. He is going to want every toy he sees, a dog, fish…the whole toy store, really," Delilah added on as she watched Jax's tone arms flex with his movements as he wrote down the details to the crib they were interested in.
Jax placed the small notepad back in his pocket and walked back over to her where she was standing behind their cart. With his signature smirk plastered across his face totally aware of the fact she was ogling him, he bent down and gave her a quick kiss on the lips before he placed his arm around her shoulder letting her direct where they would be going next.
Since that whole episode and her telling him she wouldn't be the one to turn a blind eye to the other girls she felt their relationship had improved if it had only been two weeks since. She wasn't saying that everything was perfect. She knew they still had many more issues that they had yet to discuss and she knew once Abel was actually here it would truly test their relationship. A part of her was a little frightened what would happen to them with Abel being in the picture. There was a difference in anticipating something than when it arrived. She didn't think Jax would bail on her and mostly that assurance came from the fact she knew Gemma would castrate her own son for even thinking about abandoning his family.
Delilah could admit it was partly mostly her. She felt that maybe she would jeopardize this relationship. She knew Jax told her to stop overthinking, but maybe it was those maternal instincts that were growing stronger and firmer every day. She wasn't going to let herself be ignorant in what she was possibly going to raise her son into. Being ignorant would only crumble her family in the long run.
Delilah's thoughts were broken by Jax stopping and looking at baby monitors, not just any baby monitors, but the video monitors that were really expensive, "You know it would be less expensive if we were only buying one of each instead of pairs."
"Jax," Delilah said in a lite warning tone as her grip tightened on the handle bar to the cart. She had notice Jax had been treading lightly on this subject of them living together for the past week. She knew it was a logical topic they needed to discuss and she knew why they were having this conversation was because of their situation. She knew her and Jax's relationship would be on a different realm – different track of asphalt road. They weren't just a typical one night stand that resulted in a baby – they were a one night stand who knew each other's surface backstory that new couples slowly divulged over time in the first few months. Yes, she and Jax still needed to learn more about each other has there were layers of each other they needed to peel of one another and especially on her side; Jax didn't know the six year of history she had written like she knew his.
It was just moving in together was a big step that if it happened prematurely could really break them. It was a big sign of commitment she had never once made in her life with anyone. So it wasn't just overthinking making her cautious it was just her life experience with this one.
"Have you thought about?" Jax asked her ignoring her tone as he looked away from the monitors and focused fully on her.
"All I do is think, Jax, and this isn't something to decide on a whim. This is a very monumental decision that affects our son – our family."
"It's not like we are strangers, Del."
"I know."
"So what are you exactly afraid of?"
Delilah looked at Jax and she thought the answer would be obvious as she looked him with thoughtful eyes, but their conversation was interrupted by a sales associate asking if they needed help or if they wanted to sign up for a baby registry.
Delilah and Jax walked back to her jeep with their minimal purchases that included a few clothes, toys, and some breastfeeding accessories that led to Jax becoming very curious and worried if the electric pumps were even humane for her to use causing Delilah to have a loud fit of laughter in the store much to Jax's embarrassment.
Of course, Delilah wasn't allowed to help Jax load the back of her car that he had no problem in complaining how he hated driving cages even though she offered to drive, but Jax being the Alpha man he is refused as if being pregnant made her invalid in such a mundane task.
Delilah walked to the back of the Ford where Jax was unloading the car to bring the bags into his house. "So do you have another vehicle because a newborn can't ride bitch on your bike?"
Jax looked over to Delilah with an amused smirk as he grabbed another bag, "Yeah, I got a truck in the garage, but I might trade it in for a four door so there can be a back seat."
"Hmm," Delilah replied as she closed her trunk and went to unlock his door.
"What's that for?" He asked as walked through the door and placed the items on his kitchen table as Delilah came in after him and shut his door.
"Nothing," she replied as she looked into the bag and placed some bottles in his cabinet. "Do you mind if I stash the pump here for now?"
Jax gave an indifferent shrug as he walked passed her to pack away the items and he thought for someone that was being indecisive about moving in with him she sure did know her way around his kitchen – his house.
Jax wasn't pushing her, but he felt he had somewhat a very good read on her. Delilah even though she was strong willed and smart for some apparent reason she seemed to not be that way when it comes to personal relationships. He highly suspected it was because of her parents' ill-fated love and she didn't really have an example of a good relationship where love didn't ruin. Yes, she had his mom and Clay and Luann and Otto, but they weren't her blood family, Otto was locked up, and he couldn't even recall Del really being around Clay. He knew she was around his mom, but his mom lost his biological father and he was pretty sure that tainted something within her that he was steadily trying to peel away without being overbearing.
On the living situation, he just thought most importantly it was practical for her to be here with his son under one roof. It saved them from the traveling back and forth and from buying so much baby shit because the price tags were already adding up and he didn't even factor in the medical bills if Abel's CHD turned out to be worse than predicted.
However, Jax's thoughts zoned back on Delilah, who seemed to be taking out supplies for dinner, and he didn't even realize there was chicken in his sink she must have set out to thaw while they were on their shopping excursion.
Jax hadn't dared to make a comment, but in the past few days it seemed her pregnancy body or boobs he should say developed overnight. Since she took off her long grey open sweater her swollen abdomen encased in maroon V-neck was very visible along with her boobs. He had a hard time not looking at it and he was thankful that sweater hid some of it.
Jax never thought about pregnant women, but now he could now understand why Opie thought Donna was so attractive during her pregnancy. There was nothing hotter or sexier than a woman carrying your child. It was a major turn on he didn't expect to ever have and he wanted nothing more than to take Delilah against the kitchen counter, but despite a few heated kisses exchanged between them Delilah seemed to be hesitant despite what her stomach says elsewise.
"Hey, Jax," his eyes quickly went to Delilah's face where she looked at him with a knowing expression before she continued, "Can you take these bags back to Abel's room and I am making blackened chicken with mashed potatoes, is that alright?"
Jax walked up to Delilah giving her a smile before pressing a kiss to her lips before he spoke, "I'm fine with whatever you know that."
"Well now I feel like I am spoiling you."
"Well I have to get all the attention before the little guy steals it," Jax joked as he grabbed the bags to take to Abel's room.
Jax took a final bite of his second plate of food as he patted his overstuffed belly, "Shit, Del, that was fucking delicious," Jax complimented as Delilah gave an airy laugh.
"Thanks, Jax, I am glad I made a lot you have some leftovers, too," Delilah said as she got up to grab his plate.
He immediately grabbed her wrist to stop her movement, "Shit, Del, you don't need to cook and clean, I bet you do that enough after Don."
"It's fine, Jax, it's no bother, plus you have a dishwasher and my uncle is on his fishing trip til tomorrow with Piney."
"If you insist," Jax relented and Delilah planted a swift kiss to his cheek before she grabbed his plate to rinse it off and then begin cleaning his kitchen that she promptly kicked him out of with a beer to watch TV.
Jax was flicking through the channels when Delilah emerged from the kitchen and Jax set the remote down. "You done being a mother hen."
Delilah shook her head with a smile. "Never, being a mother is a 24/7 job."
"You leaving or staying?"
"Leaving."
"You can stay," Jax offered and he knew that she was going to deny him and no matter how much he was prepared for the refusal it still stung, but he remembered it had to do with the layer of her he couldn't peel back.
"Maybe at a later time plus I have work tomorrow don't think it's the best time for a sleepover."
Jax placed his half full bottle of beer on his table before walking over to Delilah. He was leaning against the wall bringing their bodies as close as her growing stomach would allow, "So I take it that's a promise."
Delilah gave him a cheeky smile, "Maybe."
Jax bent down and his lips descended upon hers as his hands buried themselves in her soft thick blonde hair and just before the kiss could get deeper Delilah pulled away with a flush face and smile, "I'll call you tomorrow. Don't forget Lamaze starts tomorrow."
"I'll be waiting," Jax replied and was rewarded with a quick kiss before Delilah grabbed her things and he watched her leave.
Jax was nursing a beer at the bar trying his best to ignore the teases the guys were sending his way as they got wind of him attending baby classes with Delilah. For the past hour, the guys had been making baby noises and what he believed breathing patterns. Jax, himself, still was uncertain what exactly these Lamaze classes were as Delilah specifically told him it was for his benefit more than hers.
He didn't understand why if she had all the knowledge why couldn't he learn by doing, trial and error, instead of spending 40-60 minutes in a class room he hadn't done since he dropped out of high school. But he wasn't going to verbally complain as this was what Delilah wanted and it would help him to be somewhat prepared on to actually change a diaper.
Jax gave his fellow brothers the middle finger salute as he dug for a cigarette before he left when he turned his head to the telltale sound of his mom's arrival in the clubhouse from her high heels.
"You shouldn't smoke that, Delilah will be able to smell it on you and definitely those prissy moms to be," Gemma wisecracked.
Jax left the cigarette in his mouth, but made no move to light it as he raised his eyebrow at his mom who looked at him more sternly, "Hey, did you just tell me that Delilah freaked out over your deodorant. Pregnancy equals heightened senses, baby." Gemma told him as she plucked the cigarette out his mouth. "But I wanted to discuss something with you before you leave."
"Yeah."
"I was thinking about throwing Delilah a baby shower here." She told him with a smile on his face.
The blonde biker merely shrugged his shoulders, "Well, I think that is something you have to talk to Del about, but I don't think she will mind just be mindful of the help."
Gemma snorted, "Well the only leaves me you guys to help set up and clean."
"That's what the prospect is for," Jax said grinning.
"Well can you just mention is to Del and let me know how she takes it before I talk to her about it?"
"Of course, ma."
Jax didn't even know where to begin in trying to digest what he just learned and experience in his first Lamaze class and it was just the introductory class. Even without the leather kutte, he kept locked in Delilah's Ford, all eyes were on him. Even the instructor couldn't hide the surprise that Jackson Teller was in the class and was having a baby with Delilah Carmine; it seemed this made what they thought were rumors true. So, he had to seat in there for an hour with people side eyeing him and it didn't help that he recognized a few of the mothers to be as they made an appearance in his former dorm room bed. Luckily, Delilah didn't seem to pick up on the tension although that was because she was so engrossed in what their instructor was saying like now as Jax leafed through one of the handouts she gave out while Delilah said she wanted to talk to her about something.
Jax rubbed a hand down his face and tugged on the growing hairs on his chin as he contemplated if it was time for a shave as Delilah had yet to complain about his growing stubble as he read over what a "doula" was. He didn't know how explicitly complicated birth was and it even made him question why females even had multiple kids because so far he was put off and he had the easiest job on the maternity spectrum.
As Jax read more about a doula which he thought was unnecessary as they were attending this class it did make him start thinking about "postpartum". He already knew the club life would sometime intervene. He wasn't worried about it so much as the club was slow at the moment and god he hoped it stayed that way, but he was becoming worried that he might not be fully prepared for when Abel was actually born and how the whole dynamic between him and Delilah would fully change.
"Well I would have never expected to see Jax Teller learning about breathing techniques," a snide feminine voice called out to him breaking his thoughts.
Jax turned to the voice and took in the pregnant female who seemed to not be trying to come to terms with her pregnant figure, but Jax remembered her. She was a clingy one. Clingy Cheyenne he and the guys dubbed her as it took weeks for her to get it in her airhead that he wasn't interested in a full blown relationship. It should have been a neon sign as he was legally still married even if everyone knew in Charming the relationship was a dead end.
He actually felt sorry for the guy who got her pregnant. Jax gave a tight smile as he greeted her, "Cheyenne."
"I didn't know you and Delilah were a thing," Cheyenne asked with a tilted head.
Jax looked over to where Delilah was still at being chatty Cathy before he looked back at Cheyenne who was still standing there waiting for an answer, "We've been together for a while now."
"Was that before or after you punched Sebastian Fields?"
Jax looked at Cheyenne with narrowed eyes as he tried to decipher exactly why she was over here talking to him and the point of this reluctant conversation she was trying to have, "What do you want Cheyenne?"
Cheyenne opened her mouth to respond but another female voice came out startling them both, "Hey, Cheyenne, wasn't it?"
Jax looked to his side where Delilah appeared with a friendly smile as she stood somewhat protectively – possessively – in front of him and Jax couldn't hide the smirk that appeared on his face as Cheyenne plastered her own fake smile as she looked back and forth from him and Delilah.
"No, just making friendly conversation. Well I will let you two be."
Jax and Delilah watched Cheyenne make her hasty retreat and Delilah turned to him with narrowed eyes, but he quickly distracted her by wrapping an arm around her shoulder, "You ready to leave?"
"Yeah, I guess so," Delilah replied as he steered them to the exit. "So did you like the class because if you don't we don't have to go. I just thought it would be beneficial to you – us."
"It's just a lot of information and it makes me wonder why you women decide to have kids."
"Ha, you remember that when I am pushing out this baby and then have the nerve to ask if your son can have a sibling."
Jax couldn't help the wide smile at Delilah's slip of words because if she was at least thinking about their little boy having a sibling she was thinking long term in regards to their relationship. Jax just pressed a kiss to the crown of her head as he led her out to her car.
"So, I take it you and Cheyenne have history?"
Jax paused his walking that caused Delilah to stop too and she looked at him curiously.
He exhaled a deep breath as he itched for a cigarette, "It wasn't really history. She just misread things." Jax honestly didn't want to tell her that he openly was seeing other women while he was married to Wendy, but he didn't want to lie to her either.
"Look, the only reason I am asking is because she could barely keep her eyes off you during class."
"So you were jealous that she was eyeballing me?" Jax teased.
"Well I wasn't going to punch her if that's what you're suggesting," Delilah quipped. "Also, she was just trying to goad you in mentioning Sebastian."
Jax couldn't help the frown that settled across his face at the mention of Sebastian. Delilah hadn't spared any details and he didn't really want to ask. Somehow he was lucky that the incident didn't make its way back to the clubhouse however he did see Captain America give him a few mean mugs as if his hands were twitching to arrest him for assault.
"You know you have no reasons to be jealous?" Delilah told him playing with the edge of his white t-shirt.
"Who said I was jealous?" Jax countered.
Delilah barked out a laugh as she placed a chaste kiss on his lips, "Whatever helps you sleep at night, Teller."
"So you and the boy…seems serious," Don casually mentioned to Delilah as she took out the baked mac n cheese she was making them along with fried chicken.
"We're not getting married, if that's what you're wondering," Delilah replied.
Don looked at his niece who was preoccupied in making their dinner. Since whatever Jax and Delilah decided to end their mini argument, he had remained quiet on his opinion of the blossoming relationship.
He had no objections per say on the relationship on the surface. Jax was a good man and he had a good heart and he felt it was hypocritical for him to really have any objections since he was friendly with the club. There was just something in his gut that couldn't help but second guess if he was letting his niece- his daughter – walk into something. That something he knew was giving her reservations about committing herself fully to Jax and his world.
"So you're his Old Lady?"
"I think it is a little too soon to be throwing that term around."
"But that's where it is leading to," Don countered and he watched as Delilah stopped all her movement and pursed her lips in thought before she turned to face him.
"I…I'm scared that I won't be able to be the Old Lady that he may need. I've been trying to wrap my head around this new transition – phase – in my life." She revealed to him.
Don frowned at his niece and he didn't like the feeling he got with his niece's turmoil she had stewing in her head. He knew it was there, but he didn't know how deeply it could be affecting her. He itched to take a swig from his flask, but he had been trying to ween himself off since there would be a baby in his house on occasion because despite what Delilah may be thinking, he knew Jax would somehow get Delilah to move in with him by time Abel was born, but first he needed to deal with the roadblock that would give Jax problems.
"Del, Jax just wants you to be you. Don't try to be Gemma or Luann in what you think an Old Lady should be. Sure Gem and Lu will give some advice that you should take into consideration, but your relationship with Jax is yours. Also, these uncertainties – indecisiveness – you are obviously trying to come to a solution on, I will just tell you straight it's not good. It will be bad for your relationship, but it seems like you are trying to prepare yourself for something bad to happen."
"Well I need to, don't you think? There is always the threat of an angry feud with another gang or club and what if the ATF catches wind of something, I – my son – could lose Jax to jail or bullets and it would be stupid for me to ignore that until it slaps me in the goddamn face and that would ruin us - me."
Don looked up at Delilah who was doing everything in her power to be distracted by the sight of her hands as she played with the pot holder. He didn't know what to tell her because her fear was real and practical, but the what ifs would just make her paranoid and miserable. But there was something more and it was the unspoken doubt that he knew her mother planted in her that was keeping her from Jax. She didn't want to become like her mother who became so enthralled with her father that she didn't even know how function. Niall was like Lily's oxygen supply and once he was gone…well they saw what happened.
"You're not your mother, kid, and that paranoid shit you're going to drive yourself crazy. Yes, it's smart of you to be thinking about the risks and you would be stupid to not see the risks. However, you want to know what makes me feel settled and brings me security is that your taking these risks with Jax," Don revealed firmly. "I know that whatever shit storm that may lay on the club's doorstep, Jax would do everything and anything to make sure that shit doesn't go near you or that baby. He would move heaven and earth to make sure you two are taken care of. Yes, I know, there wouldn't a need for that if he wasn't in the club there wouldn't be any threat, but I trust Jax and maybe you need to start too." Donovan told his niece, who gave him a small smile as she was clearly trying to process his words.
He gave her a kiss on her forehead and tried to wrap his mind around the fact his niece – his little girl – was all grown up and was having a baby. Yeah, he seriously needed a drink.
It was Wednesday and a quiet day in the clubhouse. It was a slow day at the garage and club business was good for the most part. There was no heat with the ATF, they were good with the Niners, and they were still at a standstill with the Mayans, or the honeymoon phase, as he had coined it. They were not particularly looking to start anything with the Mayans, but the Mayans were always itching to use anything as bait to jumpstart a war. As for the Nords, Jax never really took them seriously, but at the same time he didn't underestimate them and even though they had Opie's back in Chino since he found out that they were dealing and that landed Wendy having another overdose there were a few feathers ruffled for sure.
But even though he was slightly waiting for shit to hit the fan, he was trying his best not to jinx the club business being downright boring and slow especially now that his mind was filled with baby chatter. He was still trying to slowly warm Delilah to the idea that she should consider by the time Abel is born she should make his home their permanent residence. However, Jax quickly took note that he didn't even consider that she may be put off on the whole thing since he shared that house with Wendy. He knew females were weird about that sort of thing, but he could admit he would feel some type of way living in a house Delilah shared with a significant other to a point.
Jax scowled at the thought of Delilah with any man and about how Delilah's past with any man besides Sebastian was like a ghost story, but he had no interest in talking about it.
Jax checked his phone and realized it was only 1 o'clock. Delilah still had one hour of work left before he could even drop by later on.
Jax politely accepted the cold beer handed to him by a sweetbutt when he heard a throat cleared next to him and he came face to face with Rosie, Delilah's best friend. "Rose," Jax greeted as he took a swig of his beer.
"How was your first baby class?"
Jax eyed Rosie from the side and spun on his stool to face her. Rosie didn't have a scandalous reputation per say, but she had a reputation and it made him seriously question how her and Delilah even were friends in high school and now. They were total opposites and he remembered back when she and Del were teens he heard Rosie a rumor that she had a one night stand with Sebastian and he wondered how that affected their relationship, or if it was even true.
He knew though that Del was oblivious to the habit Rosie picked up due to her classic daddy issues she claimed to have. Rosie wasn't as off as Wendy was, but Jax developed a low tolerance to junkies and he was skeptical if he could trust her with his son and how long he could keep this from Delilah, but Rosie seemed clean for the most part.
"Informative," Jax replied. "How are you and Juice?"
"Wonderful. How are you and Del?"
"What is this, twenty questions?" He asked before he took a sip of his beer.
"No, an interrogation," Rosie stated flatly.
Jax released an amused laugh, "Don't you think it is a little late for this? I mean I already got her pregnant."
"Exactly, because if you hurt her Jax. I swear to god I will vandalize your bike, cut your balls off, and use you for target practice," Rosie growled.
"You threatening me?" Jax asked still amused by little 5'6'' Rosie threatening him.
"Damn right I am," Rosie said grabbing his beer and finishing it off, "hell as no fury like a woman scorned applies to best friends as well. Keep it in your pants and don't lie or push her away if shit ever hits the fan."
Jax watched Rosie pin him down with a hard stare and he wondered what even triggered this conversation. Her last words giving him an uncomfortable feeling, "I'm not going to hurt her."
"But you will," Rosie muttered before her demeanor changed as she greeted Juice leaving Jax very confused and put off by her insinuation.
Delilah had just walked through the door of her house and was shuffling through the mail as it seemed her uncle forgot to take it out the mailbox before he left for the gym. Delilah worried how her uncle would survive without her and when in her absence Donna. Delilah walked into the dining room and set the two envelopes of bills to the side when a light pink envelope with "Redwood Manor" printed on top caught her attention.
Delilah tried to ignore it and just be content to just shuffle it in with her uncle's magazine, but she couldn't help herself as she sat down and tore open the envelope and read the contents inside.
Her mother wanted to see her.