'Ducks thrown vegetables' I'm sorry this took so long, I won't do it again, I swear!
Disclaimer:I don't own Pokemon.
"Amazing!" said Professor Oak looking ecstatic. "So this is the mystery of the GS Ball!"
Long time story short, Ash and his friends had found that Celebi had been placed in the GS Ball a long time ago by herself, Lugia, and Ho-oh, in the hopes that a extraordinary trainer would find her and release her.
"So I guess I'll send back another Pokemon to the lab to keep her on my team then, huh?" said Ash looking kind of down sending another of his Pokemon.
"Actually Ash, you may not have to this time," said Oak.
"Huh? What do you mean?" asked Ash.
"Lately I've working on a system that will allow trainers to carry a maximum of twenty Pokemon," said Oak grinning.
"Wow! Really!"
"Yes, but you'll have to put your Pokedex in the slot there, for it to work," said Oak pointing at said slot.
Ash did as he was told and put his Pokedex in the slot and after a minute or so, Oak said,"It's done! Now you can carry up to twenty Pokemon! In fact, would you like to send over any Pokemon right now?"
"You bet I do, can you send over my...uh let's see... Azuril, Bulbasaur, Butterfree, Noctowl, Quilava, Bayleaf, Pidgeot, Corphish, Squirtle, Swellow, Heracross, Primeape and Lapras?"
"Very well Ash, just wait a few minutes, I have to go round them up," said Oak. After several minutes Prof Oak transferred Ash's extra Pokemon to him and he ended the transmission.
With that, Ash turned over to Yuri and her Pokemon and said."You guys ready to go home now? Celebi can take you back your time."
"Yeah, we're ready to go now," said Yuri. "Bye, thanks for the adventure!"
"Okay," said Celebi who started glowing green. "Hang on, we're going to the future!"
"Bye Yuri, and good luck!" said Ash.
"Yeah, what he said," said Brendan sheepishly.
They disappeared in a flash and Ash said,"I wonder if we'll see her again."
"I just hope I don't land in her chest again," muttered Brendan.
-Year 2065-
"Okay, here we are," announced Celebi. "Year 2065!"
"Year what!" shouted Chuka. "You fool! We're from the year -insert year here-."
"Oops," said Celebi blushing.
"Hey...look," said an elderly voice. "It's us."
The four turned around and saw another Yuri, Chuka, and Kairi...only they were old!
"EEK! I'M UGLY!" shrieked younger Yuri.
"I'M BALD!" screamed Kairi.
"You didn't have hair to begin with, you idiot!" growled Chuka, looking somewhat relieved that age seemed to have been kind to her.
"Uh, let's just go back," chuckled Celebi who warped them back to they're proper timeline.
"So how did it go?" asked Ash when his new legendary got back.
"It went well," replied Celebi.
"Well, now that every thing all resolved, I assume we should head back to Hoenn?" asked Mewtwo.
"Yes, all right then, Mewtwo, use teleport to get us back to Mauville City," commanded Ash.
Mewtwo spread out his arms and teleported them away to said city. They traveled northward to Route 111 where Ash decided to go and reintroduce and train all of his Pokemon to Brendan.
"Holy crap!" said Brendan. "What a branched out set of Pokemon you've got, Ash!"
"Hehehe, thanks," said Ash. "Hey, do you feel like having another battle with me? You can choose which six of my Pokemon that you want to fight to make it more interesting."
"Actually, I was wondering if I could battle against your Celebi?" asked Brendan hopefully.
"Huh, me?" asked Celebi who was resting on Ash's shoulder. "Yeah," said Ash looking confused. "Celebi's a strong legendary, and even without fighting experience, it'll be nearly impossible for me to take town."
"I know," Brendan sighed. "I've realized for a while that between your three legendaries-"
"Wait," cut Ash. "Three? I've only got two, Mewtwo and Celebi."
"Your Charizard's a legendary," said Brendan dryly.
"He's right you now," said Charizard resting on the ground.
"What makes you so sure?" "That thing took down a Gyarados, Aggron, and a Salamence last week." "Point taken."
"Anyways, with Yuri confirming that your the champion, I've practically given up on trying to win this year's Hoenn competition-"
"Hey wait a minute," said Ash frowning. "Just because I've got a lot of powerful Pokemon doesn't mean you should just give up."
Brendan smiled be musingly and said,"So your just gonna throw away the match to me, that's how I'm gonna win?"
"No way, I've never thrown a match before in my life!" declared Ash.
"Good, there would be no honor in that," said Brendan. "I know I've got great Pokemon on me. The three Hoenn Starters are all formidable in they're own right, Flygon's Dragon abilities give him great power, Amber's strong as well, and don't get me started on Slaking. But you've got the experience, the ubers and destiny. What do I got? This hat!" And with that Brendan took off his hat.
Ash however let out a scream and said,"THAT'S A HAT?"
Brendan who was sporting black hair spluttered,"Of course it's a hat, I just rarely take it off!"
"I thought it was real hair," said Ash somberly.
"Hardy har har, now that the tension has been broken, let's battle!" said Brendan.
"Yeah, I need the training," said Celebi jumping off Ash's shoulder and floating in mid-air.
"All right then, Go Blaziken!" said Brendan throwing a Poke Ball to reveal Blaziken. "Time to kick some ass!" he yelled wrists blazing in fire.
"And Ash chooses Cele-GACK!" shouted Celebi who was shoved aside by Charizard. "Alright Blaziken, let's rumble!"
"Charizard! Celebi's supposed to battle, not you! Return!" called Ash calling back his fire dragon. "Now then, you can have the first move Brendan."
Three or so minutes of owning later...
"GAHH!" screamed Brendan. "That wasn't a battle, that was an embarrassing thrashing!"
"Sorry," mumbled Ash. Celebi yawned and said,"That was a good workout-hey!" Suddenly she was snatched by a rubber glove followed by evil Saturday villain laughter.
"Prepare for trouble, it's been a long time!"
"Make it double, we're getting our moment in the sun!"
"Who the!"
"Don't tell me..."
To protect the world from bad fanfics!"
"To unite all good writers within our nation!"
"Jesse!"
"James!"
"Team Rocket, blast of at the speed of light! Surrender now or prepare to read bad fanfiction!"
"Meowth, that's right!" Wobbu- Wobbuffet!"
Ash sighed and said,"I thought they were gone for good."
Brendan blinked and said,"Who are those poorly dressed people, and why do they look like Team Aqua rejects?"
"WHAT?" exploded Jessie. "I'll have you know we've been around long before those rip-off's showed up!"
"Whatever," said Ash. "Bulbasaur, use Vine Whip to get Celebi, and Charizard use Flamethrower to send them flying!"
Bulbasaur swiftly grabbed back Celebi and Charizard let out a blast of fire from his mouth at Team Rocket who were caught up in a explosion and sent blasting off.
"OH COME ONE!" screamed Meowth. "We just showed up again to get blasted off!"
"THIS IS BEYOND BASHING, THIS IS TORTURE!" yelled James.
"WE'RE GOING ON STRIKE!" The rockets all yelled as blasted off.
Brendan was flabbergasted and said,"Dude, what the fuck, you just killed them Ash!"
"What are you talking about?" asked Ash looking confused. "I've been sending them blasting off for years, and it never seems to hurt them."
"It's true," Mewtwo said. "They seem to have superhuman resistance to injury."
"I think they might be immortal," said Pikachu. "Anyways, Ash have you fixed Jigglypuff yet?"
"Uh, no," admitted Ash. "I haven't let her out in a while."
"What?" shouted Pikachu. "What if she tries to pull that same act of evil again on me?"
"I guess we better start therapy with Jigglypuff, huh," said Ash looking nervous. "Well, Jigglypuff, come on out!"
Jiggylpuff came out of the ball, opened her eyes slowly, and then let out a terrible shriek!
"BLOOD! THE BLOOD GOD DEMANDS BLOOD!" Taking out her microphone, she leaped and attempted to club Ash on the head with it, but luckily Mewtwo stopped her with Confusion and restrained her.
"LET ME GO! FOUL BLASPHMERERS! I WILL CUT OF YOUR ARMS AND LEGS AND BEAT YOU ALL TO DEATH WITH THEM!" screamed Jigglypuff.
"Ash, I think we're going have to have a Pokemon Center euthanize your Jigglypuff," said Brendan seriously.
"I can't kill one of my Pokemon!" said Ash indignantly.
"If you don't, she's gonna kill us all," said Pikachu.
"ALL I WANTED WAS TO MAKE PEOPLE HAPPY WITH MY SINGING TALENTS! BUT ! YOU HAD TO FALL ASLEEP ON ME, SHUN ME, AND INSULT ME! WHEN I BREAK OUT OF THIS GODDAMN PSYCHIC'S GRIP, I'LL RAPE YOU ALL IN THE ASS AND YOU WON'T LIKE IT ONE BIT! ESPECIALLY YOU PIKABITCH!"
Pikachu looked offended and yet somewhat hopeful that Jigglypuff would do such a thing. Celebi gave Pikachu a distasteful look and said,"You can seriously condone her doing that you? Your not that desperate?"
Pikachu shamefully looked down, twiddled his thumbs and said,"No..."
"Wait a minute," frowned Mewtwo. "Perhaps if she is given the opportunity to sing and have a person not asleep, then Jigglypuff may return to her senses."
"But what kind of Pokemon can stay awake through her song?" asked Ash.
"Well, a Pokemon with Insomina, or Soundproof can," said Brendan.
"What?" asked Ash.
"They're abilities that prevent a Pokemon from falling asleep due to Sing," explained Brendan. "Actually, I think a Noctowl is capable of having that as a Ability."
"Noctowl? Hey wait, maybe mine will stay awake, go Noctowl!" said Ash sending out his shiny Noctowl.
The alternate colored Pokemon turned towards her trainer and said,"What is that you require of me, Ash?"
"Notowl, is your ability Insomnia?" asked Ash.
"Actually, to be accurate I do not know what my ability, Ash,' said Noctowl.
"Check your Pokedex," Brendan said. "It should tell you in the analyze section."
Ash took out his Pokedex and did what Brendan suggested and said,"Okay that's really weird. It says that Noctowl has Insomina, Keen Eye, and Tinted Lens?"
"Huh? I thought a Pokemon could have only one ablity, and how could a Noctowl have Tinted Lens?" asked Brendan looking confused.
"Well, you see, my mother was from japan in a special place located in dreams and my father was from America."
That just confused everyone more but Pikachu smirked and said,"Nice, a dream world shiny, obviously a masuda method, but how come you have a british accent then?"
"To be perfectly frank, I haven't the foggiest."
"Well good enough for me," Ash said. "Noctowl I need you hear Jigglypuff sing so she'll snap out of her insanity."
"But what if it doesn't work and she kills her and all of us," asked Pikachu.
"Please Neanderthal, I'm a accomplished drug dealer, I can handle a violent pink marshmallow."
"You four should go where you can't ear Jigglypuff sing," said Mewtwo. "I will stay to protect her if needed."
"But won't you fall asleep?" asked Pikachu.
"I will put up a Safeguard on myself to protect myself from the sleep condition status that the move Sing will bring," said Mewtwo.
"Okay, but if we hear something being mauled, we'll come rushing back in," said Brendan.
"Why do you bother?" said Jigglypuff quietly. "The same thing will happen as it has for years..."
"Well, we will all soon find out, won't we?" Ash said, as he, Celebi, Pikachu, and Brendan started running away.
Once they were a good distance away, Mewtwo released Jigglypuff from his psychic hold, and placed her gently on the ground. The moment he did, Jigglypuff howled and attempted to assault Noctowl who calmly bitch slapped her with Wing Attacks.
"Now, will you calm down and sing," asked Noctowl politely like she hadn't bitch slapped someone.
Jigglypuff growled and took out her microphone and began to sing.
"Lullaby, and good night, what sweet dreams you'll have, in your world of peace and hope, the next day will bring joy."
Jigglypuff opened her eyes and expected to see two snoozing Pokemon, but saw instead, Mewtwo and Noctowl smiling pleasantly.
Jigglypuff slowly opened her mouth, "Did you two hear it?"
"Yes, and you have quite a lovely singing voice, if I say so," said Noctowl.
Mewtwo nodded in agreement and said,"It was quite soothing and worth listening to."
Jigglypuff let out a girlish squeal and glomped both of them at once, screaming,"THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU! FINALLY SOMEONES UNDERSTANDS ME!"
"Think she will be restored of her sanity?" asked Noctowl.
"Hopefully so," said Mewtwo.
"I can't believe you two stayed awake and gave me a good review," cried Jigglypuff with tears running down her face. "I thought this day would never happen."
"Well perhaps people wouldn't fall asleep if your song wasn't a lullaby," said Noctowl in her usual moments of ingenuity.
Jigglypuff frowned. "What?"
"Your song was excellent, but it was sung in a form of a lullaby," said Mewtwo. "Perhaps that's the why humans and Pokemon alike all fall asleep when you sleep."
"But...that couldn't be..it's an attack...or is it...when I first sang after eating that fruit, no one fell asleep...I just said la la...have I been singing a goddamn lullaby all these years without realizing it?" she said in a extremely mortified voice.
"I would be appear so," said Noctowl. "Shame, all those years are wasted now."
Jigglypuff calmly took a deep breath, and then let out a horrible shriek! It sounded something a demonic animal being horribly maimed with glass being scratched.
Eventually she stopped and said,"I'm okay, I won't do any crazy anymore, I'll just retire to a life of training and battling for a human to fight for a cause that's almost impossible to do."
"WE'RE HERE!" screamed Pikachu. "Don't worry Mewtwo I know a place where they can reattach your balls and make them almost as good as they once were!"
"No one was castrated, Pikachu," said Mewtwo. "Jigglypuff made that noise after gaining back her sanity."
"So she's okay now?" asked Ash.
"Yes," said Jigglypuff who started walking up to Pikachu who flinched and ran behind Ash's leg, scared much of another attempt on his manhood.
"I won't try to do that again, it's just wrong unless it's done against someone who really deserves it," said Jigglypuff.
"She won't hurt you," said Mewtwo reassuringly. "I read her mind and we've restored her sanity."
"Well, if you say so," said Pikachu looking at Jigglypuff with mistrust in his eyes. She sighed and said,"If you want to Thunderbolt, just do it if it makes you feel better."
Pikachu cheek's sparked for a moment, and then settled as he said,"No I can't do that. Part of me wants to Thunder you until till your dead, but I'm not that kind of person, if it the offense was...evil..."
"Great," Ash smiled. "We're all friends."
"Now that's settled," grinned Celebi impishly, "Let's start a band!"
"A what?" was what come out of the everyone's mouth. "Since Jigglypuff can sing now, it only makes sense that we start a band to celebrate and get fans!"
"Didn't we do that already? Or was that in a one-shot book that wasn't considered canon?" thought Pikachu.
"I don't know if I can still sing," said Jigglypuff not looking up to it..
"Don't worry, we can create lyrics and I believe that Squirtle has plenty of musical instruments he can lend us to use," said Pikachu.
"He does?" asked Ash in shock.
"Yeah, Squirtle and his Squirtle Squad were also a band part time between they're drug dealing and mischief," explained Pikachu
"I can assist by playing a piano," said Noctowl. "How?" asked Celebi. "You don't even have fingers." Noctowl smirked and sneered,"A peak, feathers, and determination can bring you far."
"But where can we go play and don't we need money and a agent to do all that?" asked Brendan. As if to respond to his question, Squirtle popped out of his Pokeball and grinned victoriously. "Finally, I have a reason to use my old stuff!"
"Huh?" asked Ash clueless as always though he wasn't alone. "Ash," started Squirtle. "When we get to Lavaridge Town, get me a Bagon, three piles of Victoria Secret underwear, a May, a Thunderstone and a Moon Stone, a frozen human head, ten pounds of Charizard dung, an old character of the day, an interesting plot point, a Rocky 3 dvd, and meet me Lavaridge next chapter at the hotsprings!" Squirtle then started walking off while Ash was even more confused.
"Squirtle! What are you talking about? I don't know where to catch a Bagon, and what's this secret about Victoria? Who's May, and what do you mean a Thunderstone and Moon Stone, Pikachu refused to evolve a long time ago and what do I need a Moon stone for? Squirtle? Squirtle? Ah, here it goes!"
Yes, fellow reviewers, May comes into the story next chapter so eager fans of May can finally stop begging her to come. An old character will come as well, but he's no friend, and he will bring a powerful opponent to Charizard that will strengthen the bond between him and Ash even stronger.
Omake:A reboot?
"HELL NO!" Sceptile roared. "THIS IS BULLSHIT! COMPLETELY FAKE, A COMPLETE FARCE, A RUMOR, SOMEBODY'S IDEA OF A SICK JOKE!"
"Sceptile," Pikachu said calmly. "We don't know for sure if this really is a reboot."
"Well, of course your not worried, your in every freaking episode and nothing's gonna change it," Sceptile said bitterly.
"I know Iron Tail and Volt Tackle in Black and White, which I only learned in Hoenn and Sinnoh respectively, so you probably still exist in Black and White.
"That's only the thing that's ticking me off my replacement is terrible!" growled Sceptile.
"Hey, Snivy's a pretty strong battler, and her attract is really useful," defended Pikachu.
"When a dream world ability makes a Pokemon so much better than having it with it's normal ability, especially when it's supposed to be a starter, it sucks!" stated Sceptile.
"Yeah," Charizard said in a disappointed tone. Emboar's Dream World ability makes it outclass an in game starter one and using a special is kinda outclassed as well."
Squirtle and Feraligatr grinned triumphantly and said,"But Oshawott isn't outclassed by it's Dream World ability, which in both it's general awesomeness in game and the fact that one use a Samurott in the metagame and do perfectly fine with, means, the Water Side wins this generation wins!"
"We'll win next!" Charizard challenged. Pikachu blanched and said,"Do you honestly think they can stretch another generation? I think they capped themselves out with this one!
Somewhere a Farfecth'd cried and said,"One day, I'll evolve and slaughter the entire OU metagame.