Chapter 14
The Away Mission
Zara watched from the sidelines as the team prepared to go through the stargate to bring some much needed supplies to New Athos. It was explained to her by Colonel Sheppard that Teyla's people had had to relocate to a new planet due to the Wraith.
She really wasn't sure what Wraith's were, but she was told that they were extremely dangerous and would not hesitate to kill any human.
This new planet was still at risk, but at least somewhat safer for the population that survived. She saw a similarity between Teyla's people and the ragged band of Colonists fleeing from the Cylons.
She sat on her little rolling seat, and wondered what it felt like to once again walk on dirt. She'd spent only an occasional amount of time on planet while she'd been with Gaion, and zero time since she'd been with Adama. The city of Atlantis was on a planet, but she didn't count that, as the city floated on the ocean.
"Will you stop?" McKay grumbled.
"What?" Ronon answered him.
McKay gave him a glance and then just shook his head. "Nothing."
"That's what I thought." Ronon looked over at Zara. "Come on."
Her head came up in surprise.
"Come with us."
Now her mouth hung open.
McKay turned around. "What? Are you nuts? She can't bring that thing. It won't roll."
"It's safe enough, and the wheels are big enough."
"She'll slow us down! She's not coming."
Ronon turned to Sheppard. "We're just bringing supplies. Why can't she come? We'll be home before supper."
"Well…" Sheppard began. He was trying to think of an argument either for or against the idea.
"She'll be in the way." McKay protested.
"I'll be responsible for her."
"I actually can't think of any regulations that forbid civilians from coming on away missions."
"She's not a civilian!" McKay's voice rose in pitch.
"Yes, she is, and so are you and Beckett…" Sheppard began. "Come to think of it, I'm the only military guy going."
"She doesn't have permission."
"Adama is up on the ship and he did say he trusted me with her. Since he's not here, that puts me in charge. I say it's fine."
McKay grimaced at Sheppard, who in then turned to Teyla.
"We were in contact with my people just yesterday, and all was safe. I think it will do her good."
"Ummmm, okay. She can come."
"Come on Zara." Ronon called.
Smiling from ear to ear, she hurried over.
McKay glared at Sheppard, but held his tongue.
Beckett came over. "You walk between us love, and you'll be just fine. Okay?"
She nodded and bent over to pick up a couple of cases. Before anyone could stop her, she had them slung over her walking device.
"You're clever lass, now aren't ye?"
"See? Less for you to carry McKay." Ronon couldn't help the smile that came to his face.
Beckett strolled over to Teyla to see if she needed a hand.
"I've got it, thank you."
"Do you see how he smiles when she's around?" Carson tilted his head towards Ronon and Zara.
"Yes, I have noticed. She's doing him as much good as he is for her."
Sheppard shuffled over, and smiled. He did a radio check and after looking around for acknowledgments, deemed them ready to go.
"Dial up New Athos."
Up in the OPS control center, the address was dialed and activated. A large whoosh sprung from the gate and receded, leaving a 'puddle of shimmering water' on the surface.
"Move out." Sheppard commanded. He took the lead and the group moved into the gate.
As Zara approached, her heart rate increased. This was the first time she'd ever gone through the gate as a freed woman.
On the other side, dawn was breaking. The sun was barely above the horizon. The early birds were in the trees chirping, and the last of the nocturnal creatures were scurrying off to bed. Dew clung to the meadow grass and taller weeds.
In front of them was a beaten dirt path, and Sheppard lead the way. Zara was positioned between Carson in front and Ronon taking sweep.
Zara took in deep breaths of the fresh crisp, morning air and sighed. It was as sweet as could be.
She rolled along without much difficulty, even with the added weight of the supply cases. The path was just wide enough.
As the sun began to peek above the horizon, she started to quietly hum an old melody from her childhood. She actually hadn't thought of it for quite a while, but the sunrise stirred the memory from her mind. The words came easily back.
"Sun Arise! She bring in the morning. Sun arise; bring in the morning, fluttering her skirts all around.
Sun Arise! She come with the dawning. Sun arise, come with the dawning, spreading all the light all around.
Sun Arise on the kangaroo paws. Sun arise on the kangaroo paws, glistening the dew all around.
Sun Arise filling all the hollows. Sun arise filling all the hollows, lighting up the hills all around.
Sun Arise come with dawning. Sun arise, she come every day. Sun arise bring in the morning.
Sun arise every every every every day.
She drive away the darkness, every day drive away the darkness and bringing back the warmth to the ground.
Sun Arise! OH ohhh!
Sun Arise! Oh, ohhhh, spreading all the light all around.
Sun arise bring in the morning.
Sun arise bring in the morning.
Sun arise bring in the morning, spreading all the light all around."
"What is that noise?" McKay turned around. Zara stopped humming.
"I don't hear anything." Ronon countered quickly. "You must be hearing things."
McKay opened his mouth to retort, but Sheppard gave him 'the look', and he closed his mouth without a word.
It didn't take long to reach the village, and Zara was disappointed to see little more than tents and shacks. The people came out in droves to greet them, however, and took over carrying the load. Teyla herself was greeted by the village leader, Halling.
Zara watched in fascination as they drew together and touched foreheads. It was gentle and respectful. Halling was introduced to Zara and he told everyone they were welcome to eat with them.
The tent was jostling with people, all talking at once, regaling one another with new stories, and laughter. Zara sat between Carson and Ronon. Both of them giving her advice on Athosian table manners. It felt odd to be among so many people, all jabbering at once, but she saw the relaxed, jovial faces and it helped her feel better.
The fact that these people had so little, and yet welcomed the Lanteans with open arms and shared openly what they did have gave Zara a sense of their good-hearted nature.
She suddenly was overcome with emotion and put her head down to hide her face. Her heart ached with longing. That's all she really wanted; a place she felt she belonged. Home.
Memories assaulted her mind. Images she tried to shake off. She played with her food to cover any signs of distress. She felt a tear build up and threaten to fall. She toyed with her hair and discreetly wiped it away. She forced herself to focus on the food on her plate. They were a poor people, but they shared so freely.
Zara was reminded of times she'd gone hungry. Her Master punished her for every little thing. Denying her food was a favorite. He'd taunt her with tiny bits too far from the cage for her to reach. It would sit there until the rats came by and ran off with it.
She squeezed her eyes closed at the painful memory, trying to force it to go away. It refused.
Other memories began to surface. Her throat became swollen and it was hard to swallow.
She held her breath. No, go away! Go away! Not now…not now… She cried in her mind.
She grabbed the hot tea and gulped it down so it burned her tongue and throat. She choked and coughed. It covered her distress.
Both Carson and Ronon leapt to her rescue, and were none the wiser of her pain.
She'd become a master of concealing her feelings when it suited her; well, almost.
Once her two companions were convinced it was just the tea, she asked Ronon where she could relieve herself. He guided her over to the designated area, and moved away to give her needed privacy and space.
Relieving herself was as important as collecting herself. Sometime she had trouble pushing the bad memories away. The pain was just unbearable at times. Her chest felt tight. She was having trouble breathing. She knew it was just the fear that had gripped her so tightly, and not the sickness inside her.
Still, she feared this sickness. Jennifer and Carson had explained it best to her, but she had questions. She didn't ask them. She was too afraid of the answers. She knew that the sickness would one day claim her. At least they were honest when they told her they could not tell her how long she would live with the sickness, but that if she took her medicine, it would help to prolong what time she had.
It was the uncertainty that frightened her, the not knowing. Yet, she was afraid of knowing too.
Heaving a deep breath, she forced down the fear, licked her hand and like the cats she'd watched, "washed" her face until there were no traces of tears left.
She re-joined Ronon, and they walked back together. As she settled backed into her seat, her stomach roiled just enough to remind her of the lurking shadows of her past.
Ronon seemed to sense her unease and he put his arm around her shoulders for a reassuring squeeze. It helped. When she looked into his brown eyes, she saw within him a troubled, painful past, a haunted soul, and a tormented mind. They were so much alike. It gave her strength when she felt her own failing. She gave him a little smile before turning back to her food. She didn't want her troubles added to his.
The day went fast; breakfast time turned into lunch time, and finally towards dinner.
Zara had helped where she could. She sat and snapped beans for cooking later with some of the women. She was glad for the work, but whispers caught her attention here and there, and it made her uncomfortable. She did her best to ignore it, and focused only on her work.
The Lanteans helped with some labor to reinforce housing structures, fix equipment, and other physical stuff. McKay of course, managed to weasel out of some of it, and moaned and groaned when he couldn't.
Dr. Beckett saw and treated patients for anything they complained of; minor sprains to inoculations to a broken leg. Zara sympathized with him. It's no fun. Hers still hurt. Carson told her it was better, but she didn't believe him. She nodded at him, but she knew better. She wasn't going to….. Loud voices broke into her thoughts. What's going on?
People ran to fetch Dr. Beckett, and then a whole bunch of people crowded into the medical tent. Zara leaned over, but couldn't figure out what was going on. Excited voices all talking at once didn't help.
People came rushing out of the tent and the flaps were closed over. Teyla went in to help with whatever it was.
Zara jumped when she heard a woman scream. She shot up out of her seat, and nearly fell. What is going on?
After a few more screams Zara bolted away. She left her walking thing and just hobbled away as fast as she could. She had to get away from the screams! She didn't care where she went or how far she had to travel, she had to get away. Panic fed her energy.
Exhausted, and finally out of earshot, she clumsily lowered herself to the ground. She didn't care that she was uncomfortable. She labored to catch her breath. Her chest was tight from anxiety, but it would pass once she calmed down.
The sun was waning and it was cooler, but not to Zara. She was sweating like crazy.
An hour later, back at the camp, a new baby was born, a little girl. Mother was fine and her baby was healthy. Daddy was a bit nervous, but all had turned out well.
John was calling everyone together now that the excitement was over and that's when they realized Zara was nowhere to be found.
No one from the village could recall seeing her once their attention had been drawn to the medical tent. John organized search teams and sent everyone off in different directions. Village men accompanied the Lanteans in their efforts so make the search more efficient.
Zara had closed her eyes for what seemed like only a few minutes, but when she opened them she saw how dim the light was. She struggled to her feet. It took a lot of effort, but she managed to stand up. She looked around, but couldn't figure out which way she had come! OH NO! Her heart sank. Where am I? Where's the village? She couldn't answer those questions. She'd never been this far away from anywhere familiar…
A memory came back. Falling. She remembered falling. That planet Gaion took her to. She remembered having a wonderful day there and then….. she was at the bottom of the hill. She was scratched up, dizzy and bruised.
Frantically, she looked around. Nothing was familiar! Inside her a voice cried, "RUN!" Her body was frozen with fear. She was hyperventilating. She couldn't help it. She didn't know what to do! Tears started coming down. What do I do? What do I do? She tried to get her breathing back under control. Panicking wouldn't help. Scream! Her inner voice said. Scream as loud as you can. I can't, I can't! Yes, you can, yes you can. What would Ronon do? Ronon would shoot his gun into the air. I don't have one. Make noise!
She scrabbled around on the ground looking for rocks, but in the meadow there was only grass and dirt.
Sticks! She looked over towards the horizon and saw the edge of the forest, but she didn't know if that would bring her closer of further from the village. She looked at the setting sun. Would she make it to the tree line before it got completely dark? Wait! Which side was the sun coming up on? She flapped her right hand. And now the sun is over there… she flapped her left hand. Then the village must be that way.
Going as carefully as she could, she started off, in the direction she thought the village was. Daylight was rapidly disappearing and she felt the fear rise up again. When darkness engulfed her, what then?
The search teams called her name, hoping she would respond somehow. John was wondering how far she could have gotten. She didn't take her rolling thing, and she was still limping. She couldn't have gone too far, could she?
McKay was annoyed at having to go around searching for her. His partner, Halling was up ahead of him, sweeping his torch side to side.
Ronon peered intently at the ground. The grass left little to track. Animals, people, had all left imprints. He tried to determine how old the signs were, but it was a jumble.
Adama's shuttle touched down and all aboard disembarked. Mr. Woolsey met them on the pier. He had only ever done that once, when they had first arrived. As soon as he saw Commander Adama, he headed straight for him.
By his straight posture, and no nonsense expression, he felt something was wrong.
"Mr. Woolsey."
"Commander Adama."
"What has happened? Is it Zara? Is she hurt?"
"She's…..slightly missing."
"What? How can she be slightly missing?"
"Sheppard took his team on an away mission to bring supplies. By all accounts, it was a safe trip off planet…"
"OFF PLANET?" Adama boomed. "She's not even on this planet?"
"She was with the team, but something happened and she ran off. They are looking for her right now. If you'll come with me to OPS, I can get you more information."
Adama followed.
"How could you let this happen?"
"Ronon was watching her and Sheppard okayed her inclusion. There was no imminent danger."
"No imminent danger? She's lost on a foreign planet! How is that not imminent danger?"
Mr. Woolsey cleared his throat. "Apparently, there was an incident."
"What kind of incident?"
"A medical emergency and we think she panicked and took off."
"If anything happens to her, I'll…" He was too angry to even finish the thought.
Ronon pulled out his blaster from his holster and fired it into the air. The booming sound shook the air and the night birds in the distance flapped angrily out of the trees. But it was just what Zara needed. She found her voice and let out a high pitched wail. She hobbled off towards the sound.
The team closest to her headed off in her direction and found her. She was cold and shaking, but unharmed. Teyla radioed that they were heading back to the village and that Zara was fine. "You gave us quite a scare, but it's over, and you're all right. Let's get back and get you some tea."