Previously;
"We need to talk. Tell me everything that happened today." Carlisle told me seriously before he sped away in the direction of the hospital. Leaving me stuck in a car with a vampire determined to get answers.
Chapter 14- Balcony
After dropping Bella and Edward at the hospital they rest of us drove home, but Carlisle kept firing questions at me, I explained everything that has happened; twice. Even the part where I revealed killing many people, but this only sparked more questions.
"Why did you kill people?" He asked me strangely curious but not angry.
"They were only human and I had to, I was under orders and before that it was in battle- self-defence." I explained to him already bored of this conversation. This caused him to mull over my answer it was a while before he spoke again.
"Who was Cam?" He said sorrowfully. Tears sprang to my eyes I was going to snap at him but I couldn't.
"Leave it alone. He's dead. Don't make me relive it." I choked out. Sadness over whelmed me, drowning my every thought, every motion. I clung tightly to the door handle; denting it slightly, debating whether to run or not. But thankfully he left at that and moved onto another touchy subject.
"You feel hardly any emotion except when he is mentioned. Tell me, why is that?" Carlisle spoke again snapping my out of my sadness like a slap round the face. Suddenly I was back to my normal self, mood swings and all.
"I can switch certain emotions off, like a lock and key per se." I explained completely unbothered.
"What do you normally have turned off?" He pried.
"Happiness, sadness, fear stuff like that but love is permanently shut off, since… since…" I wavered not wanting to say it in words. "So much so, I don't even think I could unlock it now; even if I wanted too." I gave him a sad smile and left the car as we came to a stop on the drive. I walked straight into the house and sat on the edge of the balcony; where the tree over hangs, perfectly balanced. Everyone was here except the two love birds, I heard footsteps and I immediately knew from his stride and gait it was Jasper. I flashed him a smile, which is rarely seen and he came and sat next to me. I loved Jasper, he understood me in his own sort of way, but I could never be in love with him, my heart was taken along with Cam.
"Hello, Jazz." I nudged his shoulder playfully to see if he would lose his balance but he didn't.
"Howdy, Beezus" Jasper was from Texas and he liked to let it show every now and then. He wasn't the same around the others; they see him frigid, struggling with control, weak. But he was perfectly at ease around me and he was quite funny when he put his mind to it.
"What did I say about the nicknames?!" I playfully scolded him.
"Nawww, but it suits you, Beezus. What was up with Bella anyway? She seems weirder than usual." He stated casually but whenever he said her name a faint scowl danced across his lips, it seemed only I ever noticed it though. We both disliked Bella and humans in general, that's one of the reasons we are great friends because we don't understand all the fuss over one insecure human.
"She found out I have killed people." I chuckled.
"Haven't we all? What's different about you?" He asked, running a hand through his blond curls when his golden eyes pierced into me.
"James told her which apparently makes it so much worse. I mean, you've killed as much as I have." I stated.
"You killed more humans than me, except for food." We discussed casually as if a normal person talking about points their team has won in a football match.
"They were only human." I said mildly.
"You never said; why do you dislike humans so much that you don't care about their deaths?"
"What? And you do?" I answered his question with a question he just shook his head.
"Because they have what I never did." I told him disdainfully, but I continued "You see them waste their little lives instead of living it. We would kill to have a life, a family, a home. Just to worry about the little things that makes them human." A shrugged my shoulder in an I-couldn't-care-less fashion. "What about you?" I asked him.
"All I can see them as is food, I can't help it. They tempt me and it only brings back bad memories." He said hinting at his torturous life with Maria. "What is this? The Jeremy Kyle show? Tell me your darkest secrets and problems!" He joked trying to impersonate a mediocre American. I gave him a playful smack on the arm.
"What else do you want to talk about? The weather?" I laughed.
"You know I think a storms coming in, we could play baseball." He said I quirked an eyebrow at him.
"Do you think Edward would bring Bella?" I said and suddenly blurted out "It's dangerous for her."
"Probably, they are inseparable. A baseball game isn't dangerous, Beatrice." He replied.
"That's not what was taking about." I shot back. "No human could survive this." I said including hand gestures.
"This?" He enquired copying my hand gestures .
"Our life, the vampire life. She or her family will die; it's only a matter of time for someone as fragile as herself." I stated matter-of-factly.
"Your right, especially if the Volturi gets involved. Just don't tell Edward, he is quite sensitive about that topic of conversation." He ended up whispering the last bit. We didn't care about Bella in the slightest, but Edward is a different matter entirely.
"I had a vision if she dies, he will try and kill himself via the Volturi."
"Let's just hope it won't come to that." He said giving me a reassuring smile.
Thank you for reading! A special shout out to RoyalLady9099, Natalie, Danielle Osborne and a random guest- you know who you are. THANKS GUYS! YOUR ALL AWESOME! Got something major coming up, stay tuned for my updates! Also a special thanks to my amazing editor, Elena!